Air signs (Page 2)

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Whimsy
@Whimsy
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Posted by blisss
Posted by Whimsy
I'm an air sign (Gem) married to a Scorpio, and I have some input about the "sneaky" thing.

My Scorp has never trusted me fully, although I've been completely loyal and have never given him a valid reason not to trust. He's so suspicious of everything under the sun that he SEEKS OUT reasons to be paranoid. It's frustrating.

I think this happens, in part, because Gems have so many sides to our personalities. He's not like that- he just is what he is. It's not that I'm hiding things from him, it's just that it's impossible for me to present all the sides of my personality at once. I'm sure he can tell that something is always being held back. This can be maddening for someone who always wants to get to the bottom of everything.

I have actually found myself becoming sneaky around him so that I can hide innocent behavior that I know from experience will be taken the wrong way. It's just easier than getting into an argument.



I don't believe you should have to change yourself by being sneaky because he's feeling insecure. Have you had talks with him about how you feel? How about going to a relationship counselor? It may have nothing to do with you personally. Something is making him uncomfortable and he's acting it out in the relationship (with being distrustful, insecure, paranoid) and it's not fair to the both of you.
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You are 100% on point, Blisss. He has deep-seated insecurities that were in place long before we met. Yes, there have been many discussions and fights. He has refused any counseling, but I try again every once in a while. I do try to catch myself when I'm being sneaky and immediately stop...because it IS unfair. Sometimes, though, I'd just rather sneak so that I can go to sleep (for instance) rather than staying up half the night being accused of infidelity because I did something as simple as check my phone email after a certain hour.
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PhoenixRising
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Posted by WaterCup
Posted by NotYourAverageAquarius
Posted by PhoenixRising
You made a statement that I found interesting and wanted to know more about your thoughts as to why. You always provide such evasive answers to very simple questions. I won't bother asking why. I'm sure that will be danced around as well. Peace.



Sorry :/
I thought you were trying to mock my response for some reason?
I think much like with how Scorpio is supposed to be all dark and mysterious yada yada... Aquarius being absolutely objective and devoid of emotion is a really big contradiction. If I had to guess I'd say Aquarius is probably one of the more sensitive signs in the zodiac. It's easily disguised by trying to love everyone. Hey you get rejected no biggie there's always someone else...defense mechanism #1 against rejection. Defense mechanism #2 is being as logical and objective as possible in an attempt to prove that emotions are silly. The truth is Aquarius I believe is just as sensitive as any sensitive sign you could think of. The only way to handle it I'd say is to be in a constant state of thought and detachment.

I think Scorpios particularly the women but the men too seem to have MUCH MUCH better control of how they let their emotions effect them. For me I lack this control. If someone really rattles me it's very difficult to concentrate and find my equilibrium again. I'm just shitty with emotions so I try to avoid it as best I can because I suck at expressing myself in an overly emotional way... My cap girlfriend swears up and down I was born without tear ducts LoL!



True, Aquas are very sensitive people deep down inside. We also hate dealing with negative emotions so we run if we sense something is going to hurt. It's hard for an aqua to get over & deal with emotional pain. We never forget it & never want to experience it again. That's why its hard for an aqua to open up again after being hurt...we emotionally shut down. No one ever gets that close again.
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Wow.
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aNEWday
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Posted by NotYourAverageAquarius
Posted by PhoenixRising

I think Scorpios particularly the women but the men too seem to have MUCH MUCH better control of how they let their emotions effect them.
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hmm i dont know how i feel about that sentence. the thing is scorps are aware of how deep our emotions are, so we must contain them from this world. i cant say that i have better control of how they affect me. i try not to, but usual my emotions are shown.
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aNEWday
@aNEWday
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Posted by IrresistableScorp
Posted by tiziani
Posted by IrresistableScorp
Aw. I actually love air signs and so many people around me have heavy air charts. We get along fabulously and our eccentricities complement eachother.

If I could wish for anything however it would be that air would try to 'get' water sort if intrinsically instead of having to discuss all the finer points about well everything.

There is a security in feeling understood or at least fully accepted. With air I always feel like the understanding is never, quite there. I was raised by an Aqua. I love her dearly. She still doesn't understand me. :/




Interesting because I've never had a big desire to be understood, myself. Accepted, yes. But people who place a heavy emphasis on emotionally connected with me creep me out, tbh.



air signs like to float on the surface of things. maybe thats why?
it may be uncomfortable to get too deeply connected and better to keep things all airy and light

Hmm. Interesting. Why do you find it creepy? I am fascinated. 🙂
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MrFirebird
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Posted by mermaid0315
Posted by Rabbit
You can use astrology to better understand a persons behavior.

But astrology won't teach you how to love or who to love.





🙂 True.
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I don't think astrology can really help you better understand a person's behavior because
one has to have a master's in psychology, theology, sociology, economics, for starters and
then have access to most if not all of the subject's childhood years - his upbringing
and education, hobbies and interests, religious beliefs and such things.

I doubt astrology works that way. Keep in mind, that the person in question may not live by
astrology and, in fact, violate all the dictates thereof. That's something else to consider.



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CreoleGeisha
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Posted by MrFirebird
Posted by mermaid0315
Posted by Rabbit
You can use astrology to better understand a persons behavior.

But astrology won't teach you how to love or who to love.





🙂 True.



I don't think astrology can really help you better understand a person's behavior because
one has to have a master's in psychology, theology, sociology, economics, for starters and
then have access to most if not all of the subject's childhood years - his upbringing
and education, hobbies and interests, religious beliefs and such things.

I doubt astrology works that way. Keep in mind, that the person in question may not live by
astrology and, in fact, violate all the dictates thereof. That's something else to consider.



click to expand




A late relative of mine was really "into" astrology and took it quite seriously as a "science." Everytime a family member's born, he'd create a birth chart and make predictions concerning personality, behavior, etc. of the newborn. He was surprisingly accurate.

Still, I don't know how much of his accuracy relied upon his knowledge and study of astrology. He was a strong intuitive. I think the charts were more a "tool" he used in partnership with his own skills.

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GFY
@CancerOnTheCusp
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Posted by aNEWday
If you HAD to pick one to date, which air sign would you pick and why?

Or, if you've dated one, what has been your experience.

Just curious .. I have no answer to this

Oh and of course, if you are an air sign who loves us scorps please tell me why 🙂



I have dated several air signs, none Libra.
Interestingly enough, it was a Gemini with whom I had a very deep relationship. We went our separate ways-and you'll laugh--she got too clingy.
Have had a few Gem stalkers as well.
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CreoleGeisha
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I am dubious at best about Scorpio's reputation as the sex symbol of the zodiac. For Heaven's sake, how could people generally so hell-bent on controlling everything and everybody around them ever relax long enough to enjoy even moderate pleasures?

Nothing wrong with a little healthy paranoia. The Scorpio to whom I'm closest is very much a "big picture" person. The big picture is always something to be paranoid about, I suppose. I'm more the "little details" contributor in our team. I'm not sure how controlling my every move and limiting my activities helps with the little details, but clearly the man feels it does. I try to bear it gracefully, but it's not easy.
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WaterCup
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Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by WaterCup
Posted by NotYourAverageAquarius
Posted by PhoenixRising
You made a statement that I found interesting and wanted to know more about your thoughts as to why. You always provide such evasive answers to very simple questions. I won't bother asking why. I'm sure that will be danced around as well. Peace.



Sorry :/
I thought you were trying to mock my response for some reason?
I think much like with how Scorpio is supposed to be all dark and mysterious yada yada... Aquarius being absolutely objective and devoid of emotion is a really big contradiction. If I had to guess I'd say Aquarius is probably one of the more sensitive signs in the zodiac. It's easily disguised by trying to love everyone. Hey you get rejected no biggie there's always someone else...defense mechanism #1 against rejection. Defense mechanism #2 is being as logical and objective as possible in an attempt to prove that emotions are silly. The truth is Aquarius I believe is just as sensitive as any sensitive sign you could think of. The only way to handle it I'd say is to be in a constant state of thought and detachment.

I think Scorpios particularly the women but the men too seem to have MUCH MUCH better control of how they let their emotions effect them. For me I lack this control. If someone really rattles me it's very difficult to concentrate and find my equilibrium again. I'm just shitty with emotions so I try to avoid it as best I can because I suck at expressing myself in an overly emotional way... My cap girlfriend swears up and down I was born without tear ducts LoL!



True, Aquas are very sensitive people deep down inside. We also hate dealing with negative emotions so we run if we sense something is going to hurt. It's hard for an aqua to get over & deal with emotional pain. We never forget it & never want to experience it again. That's why its hard for an aqua to open up again after being hurt...we emotionally shut down. No one ever gets that close again.



Wow.
click to expand




What 😛? Maybe some arent like that, but I am like that. I fear pain. Plus I'll never repeat a painful situation, i put thick & high walls aro
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PhoenixRising
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*sigh*....I will try this again....

Posted by WaterCup


What 😛? Maybe some arent like that, but I am like that. I fear pain. Plus I'll never repeat a painful situation, i put thick & high walls aro



Ahh, sorry. I got cut off and I was too impatient to come back and type it out. I was trying to say, NYAA and your posts really helped me understand the dynamic between my Rising/Sun etc sign. It's like trying to run away from my own shadow.
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PhoenixRising
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Posted by WaterCup
-around my heart. Good luck trying to get in. I was hurt badly once, I thought I was going to die...I didnt like it at all. Will I ever repeat that by letting myself be vulnerable again? Hell to the no. I'm an emotional coward. If it burns I'm not touching it again period. I do love but with limits, not all the way to the skeleton. No thanks.



See and this is the push-pull aspect of my Rising/Sun sign. I completely get this^^^^ and would/do respond the same way, but as a water sign I desire/crave/long for the emotional connection and I am willing to take that chance again. I wouldn't say a person couldn't get past my walls. They simply need a plane and a parachute.
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WaterCup
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Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by WaterCup
-around my heart. Good luck trying to get in. I was hurt badly once, I thought I was going to die...I didnt like it at all. Will I ever repeat that by letting myself be vulnerable again? Hell to the no. I'm an emotional coward. If it burns I'm not touching it again period. I do love but with limits, not all the way to the skeleton. No thanks.



See and this is the push-pull aspect of my Rising/Sun sign. I completely get this^^^^ and would/do respond the same way, but as a water sign I desire/crave/long for the emotional connection and I am willing to take that chance again. I wouldn't say a person couldn't get past my walls. They simply need a plane and a parachute.
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LOL @ the last part. Yes it's not easy, I get what you're talking about as well...remember I have 4 scorpio planets. But, I get warning bells every time I crave to give it a try. I dont know if it's my sun or my moon, but I just cant let myself completely go after having my heart torn into shreads. A HUGE amount of myself is reserved, you know, just incase you hurt me. I'm a real coward. Get your 2% share of love or GTFOH, I'm not taking chances lol.
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WaterCup
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Posted by IrresistableScorp
Posted by feby16aqua
Posted by IrresistableScorp
Meh. Walls suck. So glad I tore those mothers down with a sledgehammer. People love. Sometimes you win. Sometimes you lose. Pretty much the same with everything in life. Go kick some arse in life. My two cents.



I feel the same way as WC and nyaa. My walls are definitely there. It's almost like I know they are there and I hate that they are there but i've come to know nothing else. I'd imagine that the tearing down of walls would be something quite freeing. I'm not sure even how to go about it...



One way to go about it is to realize that being hurt isn't the worst thing that can happen to a person in life. Hurt happens. 🙂

And you get hurt? So what? Does your world stop? No. Do you wither away and die? No.

Sometimes you get hurt. Sometimes you get joy. It all balances out in the end--said my leeb venus...
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Do you have an idea of how much it hurts? You're a scorp so living emotionally is your thing, you do it all the time. On the other hand I'm an aqua & my home is the mental plane...I rarely go out. Meaning its rare for me to be really affected by another person emotionally. So when that happens its a big deal for me & when that person happens to cause me pain then that pain becomes this massive wound that takes time to heal. I may go back to my own home, the head, but I'm still human & I need romantic connections...so every time I venture out into the emotional world there's that wound again staring back at me. Reminding me of what happens when I play in other's territory, the territory of the brave 😛 I'm not built for continuous hurt. It scares me.

Look at it this way...2 people, one drinks alcohol daily & the other one drinks once a year...which one do you think is going to be affected more by the alcohol?
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WaterCup
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Posted by feby16aqua
Posted by WaterCup


But, I get warning bells every time I crave to give it a try. I dont know if it's my sun or my moon, but I just cant let myself completely go after having my heart torn into shreads. A HUGE amount of myself is reserved, you know, just incase you hurt me. I'm a real coward. Get your 2% share of love or GTFOH, I'm not taking chances lol.



For me it's like I'm almost there and then I snap out of it of sorts and then just float away again. That spacey look in my eyes when I'm disconnecting (even in an intimate moment like holding someone and talking to them so close). Then I usually start smiling or laughing. Something with my attention span and fear of true intimacy.

Taking a look back and seeing my personal timeline so far, it looks like I have to do it on my own time and with great time. With time, everything grows.
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I understand exactly what you mean.
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CreoleGeisha
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Posted by IrresistableScorp
Posted by feby16aqua
Posted by IrresistableScorp
Meh. Walls suck. So glad I tore those mothers down with a sledgehammer. People love. Sometimes you win. Sometimes you lose. Pretty much the same with everything in life. Go kick some arse in life. My two cents.



I feel the same way as WC and nyaa. My walls are definitely there. It's almost like I know they are there and I hate that they are there but i've come to know nothing else. I'd imagine that the tearing down of walls would be something quite freeing. I'm not sure even how to go about it...



One way to go about it is to realize that being hurt isn't the worst thing that can happen to a person in life. Hurt happens. 🙂

And you get hurt? So what? Does your world stop? No. Do you wither away and die? No.

Sometimes you get hurt. Sometimes you get joy. It all balances out in the end--said my leeb venus...
click to expand




I'd say it depends upon the hurt. In the past I lost someone very dear to me, a bereavement I wasn't prepared to accept. The hardest, worst day wasn't the day he departed; it was the day, months earlier, that I REALIZED he was was departing, that I couldn't stop it, and that I wouldn't have him with me anymore.

And yes, my world stopped and I certainly "withered" for a much longer time than I feel good about admitting. It was as though something inside me died or went dormant, too.

Sometimes the high-walled tower is a very nice place. Safe, comfortable. But no one should ever stay there for too long. Leaving can be hard and once you return to real life, you're forever changed by what you DIDN'T live.
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CreoleGeisha
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Posted by IrresistableScorp
I lost my best friend to suicide, my favorite aunt to cancer, a baby in utero and three pets died in the span of 18 months...

I call it the winter of my discontent period and, yet, here I am.



I'm sorry for your losses. I understand your naming the age, too. I always refer to a period of years after my loss "the Babylonian Capitivity." It took a very long time for anything to make sense to me following that bereavement.