Are Scorpios really controlling??

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JBG
@JBG
12 Years

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So I'm seeing a new scorpio guy. I met him awile ago, but we just started conversing more consistently recently. Any who, I know Scorpios can have a reputation for being posessive and sometimes controlling.

I saw him outside of a club, I had on shorts, they were kind of short. He immidiately tells me to "go out clothes on". He said it matter of factly, not mean or assertive. But I was wondering if this was an introduction of things to come. What do you all think?
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rockyroadicecream
@rockyroadicecream
13 Years10,000+ Posts

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Yes. Regardless of sign, any guy who shows a side of himself like that is definitely a sign of things to come. If he thinks he can tell you what to wear, imagine what else he thinks he can tell you what to do.

I've dated two Scorp Venus guys and they both had their little petty, controlling bits. One was worse than the other, though. Would say passive aggressive shit about what I wore and felt he could tell me what I should and shouldn't wear. He ended up being a grade A douche, tbh.


Fuck that noise, though. This instance you listed isn't enough to necessarily ditch the relationship, but you should start paying attention to see if this becomes a recurring issue that you should address.
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JBG
@JBG
12 Years

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Posted by Damnata
Maybe it was cold outside and he cared about you?
Maybe he said it because they were too short and you looked trashy? - not offending you just throwing a suggestion/idea
Maybe..

You've just started seeing him. See where it goes first.

That comment doesn't strike me as controlling. I would've laughed.



It actually did not strike me as controlling either. But I'm just asking bc sometimes we overlook things in the very beginning and later on realize that the warning signs were there all along. I was just trying to see what people who've DATED a scorpio or who ARE Scorpios thought of it. That's all. I thought I looked very classy. & we live in La, it was quite warm out.
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rockyroadicecream
@rockyroadicecream
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Posted by Damnata
Haven't dated nor am I one but I've run into men with controlling issues.

I gotcha.

Heed rocky's comment. It's too soon to tell.



I started to see it when he'd try to buy me clothes so early on, or wrinkled his nose at me when he saw what I was wearing post workout/practice. It always stood out to me because I thought it was stupid and hypocritical considering his usual attire was a t-shirt, jeans, and flip flops. Wrinkling his nose at my tshirt, soccer shorts, and soccer sandals was a bit ridiculous.

I let it go, but it was definitely a sign of things to come. To this day, I still see him doing and saying uber hypocritical things about others when he refuses to look at himself in the same light.
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JBG
@JBG
12 Years

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Posted by kindness
I dated a Scorpio once, and will never do it again. He was too intense, had something to say about everything I did... what I ate, what I wore, what I drank... you name it. My mom is a Scorpio, and is super controlling, I won't ever cook a meal in her kitchen, not worth the headache. However, my dad is a Scorpio, just 3 days apart, and he isn't controlling at all.



Did he have jealousy issues as well? Just curious. Like as it related to other men.
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Damnata
@Damnata
15 Years25,000+ PostsVirgo

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Posted by rockyroadicecream
Posted by Damnata
Haven't dated nor am I one but I've run into men with controlling issues.

I gotcha.

Heed rocky's comment. It's too soon to tell.



I started to see it when he'd try to buy me clothes so early on, or wrinkled his nose at me when he saw what I was wearing post workout/practice. It always stood out to me because I thought it was stupid and hypocritical considering his usual attire was a t-shirt, jeans, and flip flops. Wrinkling his nose at my tshirt, soccer shorts, and soccer sandals was a bit ridiculous.

I let it go, but it was definitely a sign of things to come. To this day, I still see him doing and saying uber hypocritical things about others when he refuses to look at himself in the same light.
click to expand




Yup, been there, got out in time.

But if she was outside a club, there's a leeway for that in my mind, depending on how she was dressed.

Too soon to tell in my mind. Then again I do give people the benefit of the doubt a lot.
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munchkin
@munchkin
11 Years1,000+ Posts

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Mine has a Cappy Venus, and Saturn conjunct Sun conjunct Pluto. Protective is an understatement. lol. It's nothing sinister as the term "controlling" implies. We just look out for each other, and are open about our concerns for each other.

Nowadays, it seems that the standard MO is that of absolute independence and freedom. Independence and freedom is necessary in a healthy relationship, but from my standpoint, as the relationship progresses, you become a cooperating team. Sometimes this means taking your partner's feelings into consideration, and making those feelings known. That's not being controlling.

/rant

Sometimes my guy gets a bit unreasonable (trying to give me a 9pm curfew even on Fri nights or weekends), but what differentiates this from being controlling is that he listened to and accepted my objections.

That and we're getting married next month, so there's more leeway for these things. If you just met the guy, that's a little strange...see if it happens again. Maybe it was just a fluke. 🙂
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Bobbo92
@Bobbo92
11 Years

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Im a double scorpio with a leo rising, so you can imagine how intense I can be. But to answer your question, us scorpios are assholes because we have no filter. We tell the truth and it sucks because when we do we say it "intensely" just because thats our nature. We don't mean usually what we say, but when it comes out its going to be true. and damn right they are going to stand by it, because scorpio's temper is worse then any other sign, you can look that up. And when they are completely happy, you wont find a person you'd rather be with. This is what my friends tell me, its not just me saying this. Hope I didn't offend anyone.

Best,
Bobbo
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JBG
@JBG
12 Years

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Posted by Bobbo92
Im a double scorpio with a leo rising, so you can imagine how intense I can be. But to answer your question, us scorpios are assholes because we have no filter. We tell the truth and it sucks because when we do we say it "intensely" just because thats our nature. We don't mean usually what we say, but when it comes out its going to be true. and damn right they are going to stand by it, because scorpio's temper is worse then any other sign, you can look that up. And when they are completely happy, you wont find a person you'd rather be with. This is what my friends tell me, its not just me saying this. Hope I didn't offend anyone.

Best,
Bobbo



This is so true! I have. A close scorpio friend, & she is so honest with me about my flaws & I hate that. I usually take people as they are bc everyone has flaws that's just the way it is. I will only tell you about yourself if you 1. Ask or 2. Your behavior directly affects me in a negative way. THATS IT. & even when I do tell you about yourself, I have a way with words, so it will never sound mean or harsh. She is so blunt & it is hurtful. I sometimes have to take time off from our friendship. She is the only friend I've felt this way about. Most of my friends are fire signs.

So, dating a scorpio could be a challenge for me. Idk
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PrettyQueenBee
@PrettyQueenBee
11 YearsCapricorn

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Posted by GetMisted
Posted by PrettyQueenBee
Scorpios will ruin you.



For other men.
click to expand




Hahahaha ! Potentially.

Scorpios have an unexplainable magnetism. They draw you in .... only to sting the shxt out of you in the end.

But my granny is a Scorpio and she's the sweetest and most supportive person ever.

Most Scorpio women - I get along with... until they get jealous about something and start acting weird and sneaky. Instant cancellation. You really have to take Scorps on a case by case term
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JBG
@JBG
12 Years

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Posted by Arielle83
Posted by JBG
So I'm seeing a new scorpio guy. I met him awile ago, but we just started conversing more consistently recently. Any who, I know Scorpios can have a reputation for being posessive and sometimes controlling.

I saw him outside of a club, I had on shorts, they were kind of short. He immidiately tells me to "go out clothes on". He said it matter of factly, not mean or assertive. But I was wondering if this was an introduction of things to come. What do you all think?


It's more paternal. He's telling you to have some self respect
click to expand




I have plenty. My shorts didn't look like underwear, they were regular shorts. Baybee my middle name should be CLASS ACT.
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JBG
@JBG
12 Years

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Posted by CreoleGeisha
On a more serious note, a Scorpio acquaintance I trust and respect once communicated to me his distaste for some of my more figure-conscious clothing. He was very subtle and gentlemanly about it, though, to the point that I DID start dressing more conservatively for his comfort. I felt more like I was doing him a favor than he was controlling me.



See, I think I'm an appropriate dresser for whatever occasion. I was at the club in NOLA I might add. (Not the most conservative city. Howewer, if I was on a date with him or going to meet his mom, my attire would def be more conservative. That's why I didn't understand his concern. Short shorts, mini skirts & crop tops are regular nightlife attire. It wasn't like I wore something out inappropriate for where I was.
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JBG
@JBG
12 Years

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Posted by Whatu
Not very subtle, any Scorpio man worth his weight would tell you what to wear by making you feel amazing in the kind of clothing he wants you to wear, You would not even know that he was in control.

Don't date us.



WOW! Everyone says the same thing. Don't date scorpio men. Should I heed this warning? You all can't be that bad. Plenty of scorpio men have long lasting happy relationships with women. My daddy is a scorpio, we get along great for the most part, but I've never dated him either. Hehe. He wasn't controlling with my mom, but he was a compulsive cheater & still cheats on his new wife. & from the noises I heard from my parents bedroom when I was a child...I'm guessing he was good in the sack. Lol he's extremely handsome & VERY charming. I don't think he's ever met a stranger, he must have some fire in his chart. I've never noticed any scorpio intensity, although he does have a little temper, but I've never seen that displayed towards my mama or stepmom. EVER. He doesn't even like to argue with women.

I don't think scorpio men are that bad, minus the cheating part.
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JBG
@JBG
12 Years

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Posted by GetMisted
Posted by Bobbo92
Im a double scorpio with a leo rising, so you can imagine how intense I can be. But to answer your question, us scorpios are assholes because we have no filter. We tell the truth and it sucks because when we do we say it "intensely" just because thats our nature. We don't mean usually what we say, but when it comes out its going to be true. and damn right they are going to stand by it, because scorpio's temper is worse then any other sign, you can look that up. And when they are completely happy, you wont find a person you'd rather be with. This is what my friends tell me, its not just me saying this. Hope I didn't offend anyone.

Best,
Bobbo



I really dislike those who mistake disrespect and vulgarity for "intensity". And when I say "mistake", I mean a total disregard for and/or an excuse as to why they will not accept accountability for the things they do and/or say.

There is a difference between being:

-Honest
-Tactful
-Respectful
-Intense
-Opinionated

And..

Being an Asshole for the sake of being an asshole.
click to expand




THANK YOU FOR THIS!
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rockyroadicecream
@rockyroadicecream
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Posted by Damnata
rocky, was your Libra ex one of the 2 venus in scorpio?

I know one Libra, Scorpio Moon, Scorpio Mercury, Scorpio Venus.

Awesome friend, batshit crazy in relationships. He also dated an Aries chick and his jealousy got to the point where he wired some tracking devices to her car. It went downhill from there fast.



Yep. He also had Scorp in Merc, apparently too. And he had Cap rising which probably didn't help much either.

Since the split, I learned a lot about him and how he functions in relationships from what mutual friends have shared with me off and on. Needless to say, had I known then what I know now about his history before me, I would have headed for the hills. Super unstable individual with relationships, both romantic and non romantic.

I have a Scorp friend shows similar tendencies that the OP mentioned too. He's a bit dysfunctional with relationships as well- controlling, jealous, double standards, and causes all sorts of drama. He seems to be calming down a bit though. ...he got into smoking weed. :/
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rockyroadicecream
@rockyroadicecream
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Posted by JBG
I'm a leo so if I like a man I do like a bit of extra adoration if you will. Maybe a slight obsession, but I don't want to be told how to run my life.



"I'm going to stick to this guy because he makes my lady bits tingle with his weirdo jealousy/possessiveness."

You know he was coming from a place of control freak, but your lady bits loved the fact that he reacted the way he did. You guys gotta get that stupid ego under control. You'd lead a much happier life in the long haul.

Leo + Scorp?

I take back what I said earlier. I have no idea how you two will fare with all that fixed craziness going on. :/ You're going to love his possessiveness because it makes you feel some sort of self worth, and eventually will grow tired of it when it becomes overkill. You start the stick poking and he starts the vindictive Scorp bs, and voil??, here comes the threads about how terrible things are.


...overall I hope things really do go well for you. No, really.

But from your responses here... Fingers crossed. :/
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JBG
@JBG
12 Years

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Posted by rockyroadicecream
Posted by JBG
I'm a leo so if I like a man I do like a bit of extra adoration if you will. Maybe a slight obsession, but I don't want to be told how to run my life.



"I'm going to stick to this guy because he makes my lady bits tingle with his weirdo jealousy/possessiveness."

You know he was coming from a place of control freak, but your lady bits loved the fact that he reacted the way he did. You guys gotta get that stupid ego under control. You'd lead a much happier life in the long haul.

Leo + Scorp?

I take back what I said earlier. I have no idea how you two will fare with all that fixed craziness going on. :/ You're going to love his possessiveness because it makes you feel some sort of self worth, and eventually will grow tired of it when it becomes overkill. You start the stick poking and he starts the vindictive Scorp bs, and voil??, here comes the threads about how terrible things are.


...overall I hope things really do go well for you. No, really.

But from your responses here... Fingers crossed. :/
click to expand




No lie Rocky...he just stopped by my house...
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lisabeth
@lisabethur8
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Posted by JBG
Posted by Whatu
Not very subtle, any Scorpio man worth his weight would tell you what to wear by making you feel amazing in the kind of clothing he wants you to wear, You would not even know that he was in control.

Don't date us.



WOW! Everyone says the same thing. Don't date scorpio men. Should I heed this warning? You all can't be that bad. Plenty of scorpio men have long lasting happy relationships with women. My daddy is a scorpio, we get along great for the most part, but I've never dated him either. Hehe. He wasn't controlling with my mom, but he was a compulsive cheater & still cheats on his new wife. & from the noises I heard from my parents bedroom when I was a child...I'm guessing he was good in the sack. Lol he's extremely handsome & VERY charming. I don't think he's ever met a stranger, he must have some fire in his chart. I've never noticed any scorpio intensity, although he does have a little temper, but I've never seen that displayed towards my mama or stepmom. EVER. He doesn't even like to argue with women.

I don't think scorpio men are that bad, minus the cheating part.
click to expand




😕
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PhoenixRising
@PhoenixRising
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Posted by Bobbo92
Im a double scorpio with a leo rising, so you can imagine how intense I can be. But to answer your question, us scorpios are assholes because we have no filter....We don't mean usually what we say, but when it comes out its going to be true. and damn right they are going to stand by it,...Hope I didn't offend anyone.




Offend? No. Made me scratch my head? Yup. You do realize the above statement is flipping back and forth like crazy right? We don't mean what we say, but it's going to be true and we stand by it 😕?

First off, I mean every word I say when I say it. I also keep a lot of things to myself because I know it will either 1) offend the person or 2) the person is not interested or ready to hear my opinion. That would be considered a filter, no?

Also, let's not confuse "truth" with honesty. When you share feedback or an opinion with someone it isn't the "truth". It's your view of things filtered through your eyes. Are Scorps honest when they express their opinion? I would said yes.
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MoonArtist
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Posted by Bobbo92
Im a double scorpio with a leo rising, so you can imagine how intense I can be. But to answer your question, us scorpios are assholes because we have no filter. We tell the truth and it sucks because when we do we say it "intensely" just because thats our nature. We don't mean usually what we say, but when it comes out its going to be true. and damn right they are going to stand by it, because scorpio's temper is worse then any other sign, you can look that up. And when they are completely happy, you wont find a person you'd rather be with. This is what my friends tell me, its not just me saying this. Hope I didn't offend anyone.

Best,
Bobbo



Ha! Triple Cancer with an Aries Mars. My temper takes a while to build but when it blows it could give the Yellowstone Caldera a run for the money....mega volcano! Worse, I know exactly the worst way to hurt people with words and how to use their weakness against them. 😛

In my defense I'll say that I learned very early in life to keep a tight rein on that wicked tongue and to only use it when I need to and that's usually when I'm ending a toxic relationship, and to not lash out with it just because I'm mad/hurt/etc.
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lisabeth
@lisabethur8
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Posted by TwirlingStrawberry
Posted by Jynja
Posted by Juicysbaby214
I have one scorpio male friend, hes an attirney. Bald head, thick beard, and a father. Hes not controling but he is a MAN and when I'm around him I def tighten up LOL but really hes a softie underneath i call him Paddington bear!



This.


one more time for good measure.



+1million

Posted by Reincarnation
Posted by Whatu
Not very subtle, any Scorpio man worth his weight would tell you what to wear by making you feel amazing in the kind of clothing he wants you to wear, You would not even know that he was in control.

Don't date us.



Not sure about that, bud. I don't hint ever.

I told my woman "Cover up" and she did.

Sorted.

Hinting is more of a Cancerian thing.
click to expand


+1
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munchkin
@munchkin
11 Years1,000+ Posts

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Posted by Bobbo92
Im a double scorpio with a leo rising, so you can imagine how intense I can be. But to answer your question, us scorpios are assholes because we have no filter. We tell the truth and it sucks because when we do we say it "intensely" just because thats our nature. We don't mean usually what we say, but when it comes out its going to be true. and damn right they are going to stand by it, because scorpio's temper is worse then any other sign, you can look that up. And when they are completely happy, you wont find a person you'd rather be with. This is what my friends tell me, its not just me saying this. Hope I didn't offend anyone.

Best,
Bobbo



This sounds like mindless regurgitation of the caricature star sign descriptions from some random geocities hosted astrology site... Sorry, but you don't get to behave like a jerkass just because you're born around Nov. That's not being "intense", that's just being interpersonally inept.

As an aside, why do astrology people act like being "intense" is something to brag about anyway? Wow, you get overcome by your urges, whoopdy doo! What makes any one person think they're more intense than average, given that one can only know completely how *s/he* feels. 😐


...no offense. 😛
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