Scorpio love: I feel so ashamed that I cant let go

I read somewhere that when a scorpio falls in love our love can be so limitless sometimes bordering on obsession. This might sound weird but i've felt that "crazy obsessiveness", and i'm so ashamed of it. I am still in love with my ex after 3 years of being apart. We dated in 2008, broke up in early 2009 and remained acquaintances. But my feelings obviously got in the way, and hers... well maybe she just liked the attention. We fell out after a huge argument caused by a dramatic incident where she drunkenly kissed me in front of the person she was with. For a year we just fell out of each other's lives but due to a mutual friend, this year we got back into contact around june. I told her I owed her an apology, apologized and she accepted it. Our mutual friend later told me she still had feelings for me but I pretended that I didn't, as after everything that happened with her (I bared my soul to her one night, drunk, because of her mixed signals and got rejected because she was with someone else) I became deathly afraid of being vulnerable. Especially if her feelings for me were just fleeting, or only nostalgia. So she got over me and til now i'm still pretending, and she decided to stay with her partner. It drives me crazy that I feel this way because each time I give myself a reality check, I don't see it happening for us again. But I still love her and its almost impossible to let it go. I haven't been with anyone else since, don't know when I will again. I dunno, should I seek help?

You know the answer to "Should I seek help?". 3 years and you cannot let go? Yes...you should. If for nothing else, the screen name you have selected for yourself here "Iamnobody"? Obv, your self esteem is shot....you ARE somebody, you have just forgotten it. Please seek therapy....you are valuable and worthy.

Haha the name was a joke actually but I do agree that my self esteem has taken a massive beating. I guess its because what with my introverted quiet nature I feel like I will never find love again and I was just lucky that time.

Posted by FireDragonScorpio
yeah...don't take the fooling around with an older scorp option. we will break your spirit and your dick too and then keep you as a pet which we will take out only on occasions when you match our outfits and furthermore, you will become addicted to bad treatment very quickly.

in a sense that is what is happening with you OP. when scorps really fall for someone, it's like an addiction in that we aren't always realistic about the object of our desires. and if a love relationship finishes and we don't want it to, then our feelings become even more exaggerated and it becomes obsessional.

it seems we all love unattainable people. sometimes i think dating is like loads of circles of people chasing after someone who is chasing after someone else. it's worth considering a 360 degree turn to actually consider the person who is chasing us...the one we wrote off cos of the person we were too busy running after.

i think sometimes its cos of the comfort zone you get into when you're in a relationship. when it ends, someone has stolen your cosey slippers and no other pair will be the same cos you had worn them in to perfection.

have faith. you will find another pair of slippers just as good if not better than the old pair which let's face it, were getting a bit smelly and used and needed replacing!

🙂😢

Why isn't she, elle? She seems like a pretty nice person with good advice.

It is the Pluto mechanism at work. Someone with lots of Scorpio/Pluto in their chart perceives every separation as intense as the first, original betrayal he has experienced very very early. The reactions are tenfold, enormously intense, you feel abandoned, left alone on a field, lookind helplessly at the other just walking away. Why is it so intense? Back to the circle, because Scorpios choose their beloved based on something the Scorpio does not (think) he has. Ex. In the case of Sagittarius - honesty and light. scorp sees herself/himself as darker than the honest Sag, therefore when the partner leaves it's as if mom left me the baby and I'll just die in this cornfield.
The idea is that during this lifetime, subconsciously, we REPLAY the same pattern over and over and over and over again. Just when we think we've learned, to our horror, we react like that again.
Well, don't be afraid. Recognize the pattern, look at it passing by, acknowledge it, and then ... I don't know. I suppose it's necessary, that's why pluto is powerful in one's chart. But don't be afraid, just read more astrology, read books about the hades moon maybe

That's true. I guess in my case I admired qualities about her that I lacked. Such as her discipline and her logical way of thinking without emotions clouding over. Her social way with people. I'll just have to try because I don't see it working out for us again, even though I really wish it could.

Posted by beccy
and who knows, perhaps truly letting go of her will actually bring her back. right now, she's pretty sure of what's going on in your head and probably likes that you're always there on the backburner but that's crap for you. give her a wake up call. sometimes people have no clue how much they value someone til they're not around any more.


^
true!

Yeah once you have made your position clear.. let her come to you, or be in limbo because your ALWAYS there waiting for her to give you an in. Fuck that! Make her know what she's missing and save your pride a bit.

Hey i've libra bits in the mix as well. Thankfully I don't have the pmt part lol.

O-O

^ Right 😛

Its not healthy Iamnobody10 to be still hung up on this person 3 years on. I think it would different if you were married and it ended, an you were still pining for that person. At the end of the day only you can make the choice either take the risk or move. If was me I would keep walking. Peace!

How about if you overestimated this person, thought they had changed, but learnt that it was just an act. That they would seemingly forever be a flirt even when they were settled down. And that they were using you. How does one get over that? Especially if you fell hard for the person.

Good to know someone else has been through it and survived, what with our scorpio emotions and all. Currently this girl is giving me attitude for something that I have no clue about, probably something she thinks I did. And i'm getting attitude and all kinds of mean comments from her without even having a normal adult confrontation first. Jesus. Having that on off switch helps sometimes if only I knew how to utilize it.

Yesterday, the quickie in yahoo horoscope says "Let yourself let go of someone -- and let go of your disillusionment"..Yesterday I realized a guy that I have dreaming to be with was interested in me after all. Well maybe it was right. Haa

not interested* i mean

Posted by Scorporella
When we love, we love with an intensity and a depth that is beyond this world. When we take the chance and let go completely, open ourselves, our hearts, to another, it is forever. We never quite get over that one love in which we take that chance with and open up to. We continue to love that person, long after the relationship ends. In fact, when we love to that depth, I don't think we ever stop loving that person, but we do learn how to go on. And you will too.

You mentioned that you don't think you will ever find love again, but you will, when you are ready to. You may never find something that equals the love you felt for this girl, but it will be special and unique and deep. We can nurse a hurt though for a very long time. And it sounds like you opened yourself completely to this girl, and for a Scorpio, that's an amazing feat in itself, and not one that is ever undertaken lightly. You will eventually let go, but you will never stop loving her.

How come my Scorpio isn't so obsessive over me? And we're married. We're separated now... but the way I feel now, it's like our whole relationship was a lie. Why isn't he fighting for me?? I really thought he loved me. I'm a Pisces...so I believed that we were soulmates. But, I thought he would fight for our marriage more since it was him that messed up by drinking and getting violent on our wall. Will someone please explain why he's not trying to fix things with me?

Posted by Iamnobody
I read somewhere that when a scorpio falls in love our love can be so limitless sometimes bordering on obsession. This might sound weird but i've felt that "crazy obsessiveness", and i'm so ashamed of it. I am still in love with my ex after 3 years of being apart. We dated in 2008, broke up in early 2009 and remained acquaintances. But my feelings obviously got in the way, and hers... well maybe she just liked the attention. We fell out after a huge argument caused by a dramatic incident where she drunkenly kissed me in front of the person she was with. For a year we just fell out of each other's lives but due to a mutual friend, this year we got back into contact around june. I told her I owed her an apology, apologized and she accepted it. Our mutual friend later told me she still had feelings for me but I pretended that I didn't, as after everything that happened with her (I bared my soul to her one night, drunk, because of her mixed signals and got rejected because she was with someone else) I became deathly afraid of being vulnerable. Especially if her feelings for me were just fleeting, or only nostalgia. So she got over me and til now i'm still pretending, and she decided to stay with her partner. It drives me crazy that I feel this way because each time I give myself a reality check, I don't see it happening for us again. But I still love her and its almost impossible to let it go. I haven't been with anyone else since, don't know when I will again. I dunno, should I seek help?

I went through the same thing bro..Just not for 3 years, Mines lasted for about a year and a half..From there, I started doing my playa thang again but still couldn't make a commitment to these new chicks..I always found something wrong with them. But now, I have an amazing Aquarius (slightly bossy but if you ignore her, she comes around) Things get better..just get out there n mingle with people. Thats what really helped me, I got too busy to care about the ex I loved so much because I was so entertained with the new chick.

The best way to get over a girl is to get under a new one.

You'll probably take this cut to the grave and that's okay. I have some myself. Go out, get your "manhood" back. Go hog riding, get really drunk and sleep with some uglies. Whatever. Get some action first. Then get rid of everything that you have from her. First step of a reality check and really moving on is REALLY MOVING ON. No contact whatsoever. It will take time, but it will get easier. I realize it's been 3 years and you're obsessed. Well we are all sick in our own little way. I can't stress getting some strange enough!