Patterns in rejecting women

Has anyone notice the more insecure a woman is the more brutal she can be after she feels like you’ve rejected her?

The last three women who mind you only at most wanted me for sex and not really dating

I noticed all went on the offensive /attack mode after feeling rejected.

Two out of the three women don’t fit current dominant beauty standards and I believe are deeply insecure …especially in regards to their weight…and from my experience were the most savage.

The most insecure literally just kept insulting me/ negging me for multiple days afterwards. Mind you she had a boyfriend of three years..so I don’t understand why she couldn’t be happy with what she has.



This last woman who is a Leo is literally dating someone right now but I think was maybe hoping to hook up with me while I was staying with her….even though I made it clear that i was on the asexual spectrum and was also clearly still hung up on one of her friends the last time we met up in December.

Anyway since feeling rejected…she’s literally been so insensitive and petty. She’s made it a point to flaunt her current partner and have loud sex but to her dismay I have only been responding in the affirmative and been cheering her and her new love interest on ( as a a good friend does…which is what i really wanted with this person because i admired and respected her so much). But anyway I suspect me not being jealous has led to futher pettiness namely her sarcastically bringing up her friend’s name / alluding to the history i had with her friend in front of the person she’s dating to get a reaction out of me on multiple occassions .( e.g Saying her friend for example sarcastically is the love of my life) .

So f*cking mean.

She always does it in front of this person so that I can’t exactly call her out on it.

The best I was able to do without looking like I was too bothered was ask her why she kept bringing certain names up? And what was her angle/intention

Of course she didn’t reply but smirked and looked so self satisfied.

men rejecting women just leads to the women wanting the men more.

women rejecting women becomes petty central.

its a very strange variable of dynamics.

Rejection breeds obsession. This is an issue for both men & women, with the difference being some women just simply are never told no.

Women only care about how THEY feel about you. This can pretty much sum up any irrational behavior or why women put themselves in strange positions.

This is a slippery slope, you better stop recognizing the unconscious shenanigans of women before it's too late.

don't know how other women operate but if i feel any semblance of rejection from someone i'm not that into, i'm more annoyed by it 🤷‍♀🤷‍♀

BUT if i was more into the person, i'm always wondering why he's not dropping me

Posted by StubbornSag
"Two out of the three women don’t fit current dominant beauty standards" - this sounds so miserable to say.

And yeah, I'm sure they should jave been thrilled for getting rejected cause everyone loves that in every way, both men and women. Applying for job and you're not accepted, what should you do? Well go celebrate! A guy/girl you like doesn't like you back, what should you do? Well, go out and celebrate!

Tbh you just sound like you're making stuff up out of pure boredom cause none if this makes sense.

I wish I was dude especially becuase I was realy interested inbecoming great friends with them as i really admire and respect them.

And yes I agree no one likes rejection but if it’s clear as to why it wouldn’t work out in the first place as in i say i am interested only in one person right now and it’s rare for me to be sexually attracted to anyone…then why still shoot your shot and expect a different outcome?

Posted by TXCowboy
1. Yes, definitely.


You should remove yourself ASAP from that situation and reevaluate who it is you're attracting and bailing out as soon as red flags/deal breakers present themselves.

You always have the most sound advice and yes I am definitely going to try and work on this in therapy.

Posted by Eggroll
Why were you staying with the Leo? What was the nature of the friendship/relationship for you to be staying with her? Did you pay rent?

She invited me to stay with her to recover at her place because I had surgery in her hometown.

I never asked…she volunteered. I had hoped that it was a pure act of friendship but deep down I knew that maybe it was because she was attracted to me.

She invited me when we barely knew each other..so I had a feeling. But also mind you she was also more and really into a mutual friend …so I didn’t feel like I had to take my suspicion that seriously.

Posted by virgoOPPP
don't know how other women operate but if i feel any semblance of rejection from someone i'm not that into, i'm more annoyed by it 🤷‍♀🤷‍♀

BUT if i was more into the person, i'm always wondering why he's not dropping me

yeah like in my head I don’t think these women ever really liked me liked me….

they just were drawn to the emotionally unavailiabilty and challenge.

But also I get the being annoyed when you simply weren’t actually interested in the first place.

I once hung out with this Taurus women about a decade ago who went out of her way to say that we were not on a date ( even though I didn’t ask her out on one)…and it did piss me off..but I wasn’t rude or petty.

I didn’t have the words at the time to tell her I was actually demisexual ( which is another way …more polite of saying I am not physically / sexually attracted to you..because that is rare for me)

but I was annoyed because it kind of ruined the potentional to be friends as it made it awkward.

To this day that experience is probably why I never feel the need to go out of my way to reject a woman…unless they explicity try to get physical or something . I just won’t flirt back and or be forthcoming if I’m into someone else aka I will treat them like how iI would any friend.

Posted by StubbornSag

Posted by Adreamuponwaking

Posted by StubbornSag
"Two out of the three women don’t fit current dominant beauty standards" - this sounds so miserable to say.

And yeah, I'm sure they should jave been thrilled for getting rejected cause everyone loves that in every way, both men and women. Applying for job and you're not accepted, what should you do? Well go celebrate! A guy/girl you like doesn't like you back, what should you do? Well, go out and celebrate!

Tbh you just sound like you're making stuff up out of pure boredom cause none if this makes sense.

I wish I was dude especially becuase I was realy interested inbecoming great friends with them as i really admire and respect them.


And yes I agree no one likes rejection but if it’s clear as to why it wouldn’t work out in the first place as in i say i am interested only in one person right now and it’s rare for me to be sexually attracted to anyone…then why still shoot your shot and expect a different outcome?

Because people do that, they keep trying. Both men and women do that. Have been several times in that situation, men keep trying too despite being rejected. They may not get bitter about it as women do, but they can be extremely persistent. I know this one guy who chased my Virgo friend for years despite being rejected like hundred times. He would send her paragraphs, telling her to think about it really well and reconsider her options and stuff like that🤣 what's worse, they worked together and she couldn't just send him straight to hell or block him or be mean to him. Also Leos take rejection very hard. I had one hit me up constantly over years and I never even responded. Then even after like 10 years since we last talked he still tried 🙄

click to expand

There was this fellow pisces I met about 7 years ago who actually was the first woman I was attracted to ..so she will also hold a special place in my heart but since 2019 I always reached out to her 1- 2 times a year ( one being on her birthday) …but anywas long story short i think she still thinks I like her or liked her the whole time just because I kept bothering to reach out in the first place.

I never flirt and have long lost interest romantically ..especially since she’s married I think but geniunely wanted to catch up and be friends.

We had similar musical tastes which is rare… so it would have been nice to have a concert buddy.

—————

Question——

why is being mean a go to when rejecting someone?

I mean I guess theoretcially it would help the person to get oversomeone but I think it more likely would just make me feel worse for having feeling for someone who wasn’t kind…or in other words it would kind of compound the trauma.

Just my two cents.

Posted by Adreamuponwaking

Posted by Eggroll
Why were you staying with the Leo? What was the nature of the friendship/relationship for you to be staying with her? Did you pay rent?

She invited me to stay with her to recover at her place because I had surgery in her hometown.

I never asked…she volunteered. I had hoped that it was a pure act of friendship but deep down I knew that maybe it was because she was attracted to me.


She invited me when we barely knew each other..so I had a feeling. But also mind you she was also more and really into a mutual friend …so I didn’t feel like I had to take my suspicion that seriously.

click to expand

It's odd to take up such a request when you barely knew each other. You had to somewhat know, instinctively, there would be some sort of trading going on, if you weren't paying rent.

Nothing is free in life and people aren't this friendly.

Are you leaving her place soon? Because if she's making you uncomfortable, why are you still there?

Posted by saggurl88

Posted by Adreamuponwaking

Posted by Eggroll
Why were you staying with the Leo? What was the nature of the friendship/relationship for you to be staying with her? Did you pay rent?

She invited me to stay with her to recover at her place because I had surgery in her hometown.

I never asked…she volunteered. I had hoped that it was a pure act of friendship but deep down I knew that maybe it was because she was attracted to me.

She invited me when we barely knew each other..so I had a feeling. But also mind you she was also more and really into a mutual friend …so I didn’t feel like I had to take my suspicion that seriously.
click to expand

It's odd to take up such a request when you barely knew each other. You had to somewhat know, instinctively, there would be some sort of trading going on, if you weren't paying rent.

Nothing is free in life and people aren't this friendly.


Are you leaving her place soon? Because if she's making you uncomfortable, why are you still there?

click to expand

Yeah I leave in less than a week.

And I agree with you …mostly. I am however this nice and would do this.

I also know there are other peopole that are as altruistic as me . I am gathering that it is rare though…at least in the west.

There’s also lastly a semi legacy of people in the lgbtq community supporting each other in ways like this earlier on in forming strong family like platonic relationships ( e.g- think of the drag families/ the ball room culture of the late 80s/early 90s for example) because many of us don’t have a strong support network in terms of our family as many of us have been disowned by our families due to our sexuality and or being trans.

I was hoping I think that her inviting me to stay was more reflective of the this more than anything.

Posted by Adreamuponwaking

Posted by saggurl88

Posted by Adreamuponwaking

Posted by Eggroll
Why were you staying with the Leo? What was the nature of the friendship/relationship for you to be staying with her? Did you pay rent?

She invited me to stay with her to recover at her place because I had surgery in her hometown.

I never asked…she volunteered. I had hoped that it was a pure act of friendship but deep down I knew that maybe it was because she was attracted to me.

She invited me when we barely knew each other..so I had a feeling. But also mind you she was also more and really into a mutual friend …so I didn’t feel like I had to take my suspicion that seriously.
click to expand

It's odd to take up such a request when you barely knew each other. You had to somewhat know, instinctively, there would be some sort of trading going on, if you weren't paying rent.

Nothing is free in life and people aren't this friendly.

Are you leaving her place soon? Because if she's making you uncomfortable, why are you still there?
click to expand

Yeah I leave in less than a week.


And I agree with you …mostly. I am however this nice and would do this.

I also know there are other peopole that are as altruistic as me . I am gathering that it is rare though…at least in the west.


There’s also lastly a semi legacy of people in the lgbtq community supporting each other in ways like this earlier on in forming strong family like platonic relationships ( e.g- think of the drag families/ the ball room culture of the late 80s/early 90s for example) because many of us don’t have a strong support network in terms of our family as many of us have been disowned by our families due to our sexuality and or being trans.


I was hoping I think that her inviting me to stay was more reflective of the this more than anything.

click to expand

Hopefully you find a safe place to go.

All I see is online jokes of lesbians bringing luggage on the first date, so I guess it can be pretty common for things to move fast, but I don't hear of this type of thing happening in poly relationships.

Usually there is pretty clear intentions of what is supposed to happen once a person is living there. But also, like you say, you were just supposed to be crashing for convenience.

As you can see, I don't have much value to add to your OP, but I don't know how this type of thing doesn't scare you. Hopefully there are more supporting people in your community who aren't like this and are helpful with no intent behind it.

I would be fearful for my daughter living like this. It makes me nervous just reading your posts. Be safe out there!

Posted by saggurl88

Posted by Adreamuponwaking

Posted by saggurl88

Posted by Adreamuponwaking

Posted by Eggroll
Why were you staying with the Leo? What was the nature of the friendship/relationship for you to be staying with her? Did you pay rent?

She invited me to stay with her to recover at her place because I had surgery in her hometown.

I never asked…she volunteered. I had hoped that it was a pure act of friendship but deep down I knew that maybe it was because she was attracted to me.

She invited me when we barely knew each other..so I had a feeling. But also mind you she was also more and really into a mutual friend …so I didn’t feel like I had to take my suspicion that seriously.
click to expand

It's odd to take up such a request when you barely knew each other. You had to somewhat know, instinctively, there would be some sort of trading going on, if you weren't paying rent.

Nothing is free in life and people aren't this friendly.

Are you leaving her place soon? Because if she's making you uncomfortable, why are you still there?
click to expand

Yeah I leave in less than a week.

And I agree with you …mostly. I am however this nice and would do this.

I also know there are other peopole that are as altruistic as me . I am gathering that it is rare though…at least in the west.

There’s also lastly a semi legacy of people in the lgbtq community supporting each other in ways like this earlier on in forming strong family like platonic relationships ( e.g- think of the drag families/ the ball room culture of the late 80s/early 90s for example) because many of us don’t have a strong support network in terms of our family as many of us have been disowned by our families due to our sexuality and or being trans.

I was hoping I think that her inviting me to stay was more reflective of the this more than anything.

click to expand

Hopefully you find a safe place to go.


All I see is online jokes of lesbians bringing luggage on the first date, so I guess it can be pretty common for things to move fast, but I don't hear of this type of thing happening in poly relationships.

Usually there is pretty clear intentions of what is supposed to happen once a person is living there. But also, like you say, you were just supposed to be crashing for convenience.


As you can see, I don't have much value to add to your OP, but I don't know how this type of thing doesn't scare you. Hopefully there are more supporting people in your community who aren't like this and are helpful with no intent behind it.

I would be fearful for my daughter living like this. It makes me nervous just reading your posts. Be safe out there!

click to expand

Thank you so much for you input and concern/well wishes regarding my safety…as well as trying to highlight my accountability. I am always striving to learn from my experiences and it’s always easier with other perspectives.

So in short your input /perspective is always deeply appreciated.