lisabeth
@lisabethur8
13 Years50,000+ Posts
Comments: 4373 · Posts: 50653 · Topics: 564
Single mothers... (Page 2)
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Fertility Higher Than in Other Developed Nations
Another measure of birth levels is the total fertility rate, or number of children the average woman is predicted to have, based on current age-specific birth rates. That rate for the United States, 2.10 in 20081, is about what it was in 1990. The number is about or slightly below the “replacement rate” — that is, the level at which enough children are born to replace their parents in the population — and has been for most years since the baby bust of the early 1970s.
Compared with Canada, and most nations in Europe and Asia, the U.S. has a higher total fertility rate. Rates such as 1.4 in Austria, Italy and Japan have produced concern about whether those nations will have enough people of working age in the future to support their elderly populations, and whether their total populations could decline in size.
Why are fertility rates somewhat higher in the United States than in other developed nations? Some researchers contend that fertility rates are low in some other developed countries-Italy and Japan, for example-in part because of lack of support for mothers who also hold paid employment. Those countries also have a lower share of births to unmarried women. The religiosity of the U.S. population also has been suggested as a factor, because it is associated with a desire for larger families.2
http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2010/05/06/the-new-demography-of-american-motherhood/
Another measure of birth levels is the total fertility rate, or number of children the average woman is predicted to have, based on current age-specific birth rates. That rate for the United States, 2.10 in 20081, is about what it was in 1990. The number is about or slightly below the “replacement rate” — that is, the level at which enough children are born to replace their parents in the population — and has been for most years since the baby bust of the early 1970s.
Compared with Canada, and most nations in Europe and Asia, the U.S. has a higher total fertility rate. Rates such as 1.4 in Austria, Italy and Japan have produced concern about whether those nations will have enough people of working age in the future to support their elderly populations, and whether their total populations could decline in size.
Why are fertility rates somewhat higher in the United States than in other developed nations? Some researchers contend that fertility rates are low in some other developed countries-Italy and Japan, for example-in part because of lack of support for mothers who also hold paid employment. Those countries also have a lower share of births to unmarried women. The religiosity of the U.S. population also has been suggested as a factor, because it is associated with a desire for larger families.2
http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2010/05/06/the-new-demography-of-american-motherhood/
Posted by Gemoodeye1
I think you are using one example as a broad generalization of single mothers and about men, without considering the many different scenarios of both. I am divorced, with 4 children from one man, the one I was married to for over a decade. I'm educated, have a career that provides for my children and have always made at least an equal income to their father. We share custody equally and live close to each other and work together to take care of our kids. I'm not looking for anyone to save me, nor do I need them too. I'm looking for an equal partner who enhances my life and I enhance his with love, support (emotional), passion, etc. like anyone else who is dating for a purpose.
I was closed off to the idea of dating men without kids initially because I never wanted anyone to assume I needed their help or was looking to be saved, and figured they would not understand my life style . However, that was not a fair assessment because quite contrary to what you are saying, I think (from having these conversations with men I've met or dated) they do not think of it as a sacrifice to date a single mother...maybe they love kids and never had the chance to have them either because they couldn't in their prior marriage/RS or they never met someone they wanted to marry and/or have children with.
Although I'm very upfront about my kids and talk about them with who I am dating, I've never introduced anyone to my kids, nor would I unless the RS was serious enough that it was headed toward marriage. At that point the man loves you for you and your children are a bonus, not a burden.
I was concerned initially about dating at all with four children assuming that would be an immediate disqualification for many men, yet I've never had that problem, probably because the characteristics of a mother and the growth that motherhood brings to a person (added compassion, strength, time management, responsibility, life experience) can make a woman more attractive to many men.
@gemoodeye1, men too who haven't found someone compatible enough, have similar thoughts about being with a woman, child or no child.
i think though that you're stemming away from the original intent of the topic. It is rarer for a man to love a woman with a child, from my observation. but it is not impossible of course. it happens all the time. it's just not something a lot of men want in their life.
i see that.you both can have your children play together and spend time together, as a family unit.
i think though that you're stemming away from the original intent of the topic. It is rarer for a man to love a woman with a child, from my observation. but it is not impossible of course. it happens all the time. it's just not something a lot of men want in their life.
Posted by ParisianCappy
if i had child too maybe
i see that.you both can have your children play together and spend time together, as a family unit.
Posted by PV&Jellayyour venus aquairus is showing a lot. (and 11th house sun?)
Its the whole saving thing that I find off putting. As if single women and mothers are charity cases in need of fixing and rescuing because they don't have a man. It's elitist, being married or having a man doesn't some how mean a woman has a better life, and is in a position to pity someone who is a single mom. I know a lot of married women who are still single mothers, their husbands are worthless.
To the original question, yes there are good men who have no issue with dating women who have children. But they usually don't go after the pathetic ones who need rescuing. It's more so the woman has the traits they are looking for and she just happens to have children.
i don't see it a problem myself, if a man loves a woman truly and shows it, by showing affection to both woman and child. that he makes an effort.
my cappy mother in law who has aquairus venus never wanted to feel that a man would complete her either, she loves her independence. She is one of the women at the party who mentioned too, how lovely it is for a man like the man we witnessed that shows love to woman who just recently had a child, which is not his. Also a few other women too.
would they in turn choose those types?? I have no idea, it never happened to them. but when they observed it, they al thought it was very lovely, including me.
Posted by lisabethur8Absolutely not. Not that my family culture doesn't support it (they don't lol), but personal preference. It's a complete clustertruck trying to blend yourself into a past man's family and raising and supporting another's man's kid while the kid looks at you like the enemy cause dad's on a fishing trip and mommy is always having with me. Nawh. A man who actively seeks single mothers.... dude in my opinion is looking to feast on her insecurity of being a single mother. And you don't date her, you are dating her AND the kids. It's a package deal you didn't even sign up for. I just seen so many guys go through it and get heartbroken because they break up and he loves the kids then since they arent his kids, never sees them again.
so we were at a party earlier this evening and we were all talking about a certain guy who had left the party, and he LOVES to get with women who have children, babies, ect.
he just is so sweet. The women in the group were all, soooo damn sweet, including me. It IS really.
that is a very special man indeed.
so the question is,
would you, single males, date a woman with children?
why and why not?
be honest.
http://halloftheblackdragon.com/reel/the-dos-and-donts-of-dating-a-woman-with-children/
and what type of man do you envision that loves and cares for a young woman or middle aged woman with children?? babies or teenaged children ect.
No, 2/10 wouldn't recommend to a friend.
Posted by Librasetting*raises eyebrow*
So I'm not trying to save the female I'm trying to save your little boy from more than you'll ever truly know or can understand...
You're just projecting yourself on every relationship. Be ready for lots of disappointment my friend.
Posted by Arielle83neither can i what?Posted by lisabethur8Neither can you.Posted by Arielle83maybe for you, you can hold your own. but not many women do still. that's the truth of it all.Posted by PV&JellayI watched a doco about the tactics pedos use and the whole chemical castration thing.Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Harukkalol
You are kind of "proud married female"
Good for you by the way lol
the topic is really about what I witnessed last night at a party.
actually what some of us ladies witnessed, and it's rare that there are men who go for a woman with children.
to be honest, those are not the types of men I go for though. I notice that.
but I can APPRECIATE them like the other women have.
it's just a sad fact of life.that it's rare and not everyone wants those types, yet there are women who really appreciate those types too!! there's something /someone for everyone.
If he primarily goes for women with children I find that shit suspicious, not sweet. **jaded social worker**
Some of the men admitted to targeting single mothers. Mainly because some single mothers are looking to love or be loved. They are needy and then the man acts like a perfect father figure. Grooming the mother and nurturing the kids.
Allowing him to babysit.
Developing trust.
Some women go through men quickly and let their guard down quick if they're lonely.
Some mothers are already aware of the creepiness of wanting to nurture another man's child, right off the bat.
This is why the biological father's are suspicious or territorial.
It makes no sense to want to step in so quickly.
"Saving" a single mom is one of the most fucked up thing I've ever heard.
It's 2016, women can hold their own heads.
you can't just rant and rave about other women like that cause you're not in their shoes. I mean yeah you can rant and rave, but then you don't know their lives, so it doesn't seem very empathetic.click to expand
Posted by Capri-sunwhy do you and koniuchaa think that? i honestly want to know.Posted by KoniuchaaCute picture 🙂
Pretty sure OP is trolling.click to expand
Posted by lisabethur8Honestly. The BEST way in my opinion. You have kids, he has kids. You both know how your worlds operate. You both have that understanding of the position you are in. You are more likely to blend because you both know what must be done in order to have a successful relationship with the spouse and the kids.
so we were at a party earlier this evening and we were all talking about a certain guy who had left the party, and he LOVES to get with women who have children, babies, ect.
he just is so sweet. The women in the group were all, soooo damn sweet, including me. It IS really.
that is a very special man indeed.
so the question is,
would you, single males, date a woman with children?
why and why not?
be honest.
http://halloftheblackdragon.com/reel/the-dos-and-donts-of-dating-a-woman-with-children/
and what type of man do you envision that loves and cares for a young woman or middle aged woman with children?? babies or teenaged children ect.
If one of the other party doesn't have kids. Be prepared for a lot of frustration.
Posted by AriesLovePosted by lisabethur8Huh?Posted by AriesLoveit's not very common in some areas, and most common in different regions, such as whether they are in the bible belt or in certain neighborhoods.
I personally think single dads have it harder. A lot of woman do not want to be in situations where they have to be a stepmother because a mother plays the more nurturing part. Also men are less likely to try and get financial support from the biological mother do to pride or just not wanting her to be a part of the child's life. I know men like this.
Me personally, I have never dated or married a man who had a issue with my kid or kids at the time or even now. Most have kids as well. Most people in their late 20's or early 30's have kids. It's so common.
As far as the "saving" no I can't relate to that because my ex husbands take such good care of our kids financially and physically. They want for nothing. Not only do they support them financially through me but they also by extra things for birthday, Christmas, school and they have double things when they go stay at their house. Any guy I date it's soley for my company only but of course I want them to be decent men for when I choose to allow them around my kids. But they don't need fathers they already have them.
I have known some woman who want that "father figure" due to their kids father not being around or needing help if the father wasn't supporting them financially because BOTH parents should be taking care of a child they BOTH created. I don't care if the mother has a job or not it's dumb to struggle and deprive your child of things because you don't want the father around.
the poorer the neighborhood, the more common it is where younger women who are single have children.
I think there's a statistics to this though.
Late 20's and early 30's are not young women. The 30's are the start of middle age. A lot of these people have been married and divorced. A single mom doesn't mean she was never married. It means she is "currently" single.
Most of the single moms I hear about now and days are these middle class older woman popping out babies with no husband. Half of these women now and days don't even want to get married first. They want to have babies and live together without ever being married.
But let's run down just SOME of the celebrity women who were never married to their baby daddy. Tell me if they were poor. You know this your specialty:
Kourtney Kardashian
Minnie Driver
Kate Moss
Padma Lakshmi
Jamie Lynn Spears
Vanessa Paradis
Bridget Moynahan
click to expand
they're not old either. jeeeez.
we can look online sources to find the middle age range. some sources say 35. some say 40.
Posted by KodakPosted by lisabethur8Honestly. The BEST way in my opinion. You have kids, he has kids. You both know how your worlds operate. You both have that understanding of the position you are in. You are more likely to blend because you both know what must be done in order to have a successful relationship with the spouse and the kids.
so we were at a party earlier this evening and we were all talking about a certain guy who had left the party, and he LOVES to get with women who have children, babies, ect.
he just is so sweet. The women in the group were all, soooo damn sweet, including me. It IS really.
that is a very special man indeed.
so the question is,
would you, single males, date a woman with children?
why and why not?
be honest.
http://halloftheblackdragon.com/reel/the-dos-and-donts-of-dating-a-woman-with-children/
and what type of man do you envision that loves and cares for a young woman or middle aged woman with children?? babies or teenaged children ect.
If one of the other party doesn't have kids. Be prepared for a lot of frustration.click to expand
yes i realize that, but the world doesn't work like that. it's not black and white, that you just have children with your one partner.
it's just so unrealistic when i see around me. and these people seem really happy when they found someone.
Posted by lisabethur8The world doesn't work like that? I'm not saying it HAS to be anything. I'm saying in my opinion, the best chance of longevity and happiness is common ground.Posted by KodakPosted by lisabethur8Honestly. The BEST way in my opinion. You have kids, he has kids. You both know how your worlds operate. You both have that understanding of the position you are in. You are more likely to blend because you both know what must be done in order to have a successful relationship with the spouse and the kids.
so we were at a party earlier this evening and we were all talking about a certain guy who had left the party, and he LOVES to get with women who have children, babies, ect.
he just is so sweet. The women in the group were all, soooo damn sweet, including me. It IS really.
that is a very special man indeed.
so the question is,
would you, single males, date a woman with children?
why and why not?
be honest.
http://halloftheblackdragon.com/reel/the-dos-and-donts-of-dating-a-woman-with-children/
and what type of man do you envision that loves and cares for a young woman or middle aged woman with children?? babies or teenaged children ect.
If one of the other party doesn't have kids. Be prepared for a lot of frustration.
yes i realize that, but the world doesn't work like that. it's not black and white, that you just have children with your one partner.
it's just so unrealistic when i see around me. and these people seem really happy when they found someone.
click to expand
@arieslove, i think your message and my message are getting MIXED.
Posted by lisabethur8I respect your opinion but I would adamently disagree with your assumption that it's rare, from my experience and my circle. I suppose it also depends on the age range. I'm 32 and date men who are ten years older. No shortage of men in the single mom dating pool around here. ?
@gemoodeye1, men too who haven't found someone compatible enough, have similar thoughts about being with a woman, child or no child.
i think though that you're stemming away from the original intent of the topic. It is rarer for a man to love a woman with a child, from my observation. but it is not impossible of course. it happens all the time. it's just not something a lot of men want in their life.Posted by ParisianCappy
if i had child too maybe
i see that.you both can have your children play together and spend time together, as a family unit.
click to expand
Posted by AriesLovePosted by lisabethur8I would never consider a 28-34 year old woman a "young" woman way below the age of conception.Posted by AriesLovePosted by lisabethur8Huh?Posted by AriesLoveit's not very common in some areas, and most common in different regions, such as whether they are in the bible belt or in certain neighborhoods.
I personally think single dads have it harder. A lot of woman do not want to be in situations where they have to be a stepmother because a mother plays the more nurturing part. Also men are less likely to try and get financial support from the biological mother do to pride or just not wanting her to be a part of the child's life. I know men like this.
Me personally, I have never dated or married a man who had a issue with my kid or kids at the time or even now. Most have kids as well. Most people in their late 20's or early 30's have kids. It's so common.
As far as the "saving" no I can't relate to that because my ex husbands take such good care of our kids financially and physically. They want for nothing. Not only do they support them financially through me but they also by extra things for birthday, Christmas, school and they have double things when they go stay at their house. Any guy I date it's soley for my company only but of course I want them to be decent men for when I choose to allow them around my kids. But they don't need fathers they already have them.
I have known some woman who want that "father figure" due to their kids father not being around or needing help if the father wasn't supporting them financially because BOTH parents should be taking care of a child they BOTH created. I don't care if the mother has a job or not it's dumb to struggle and deprive your child of things because you don't want the father around.
the poorer the neighborhood, the more common it is where younger women who are single have children.
I think there's a statistics to this though.
Late 20's and early 30's are not young women. The 30's are the start of middle age. A lot of these people have been married and divorced. A single mom doesn't mean she was never married. It means she is "currently" single.
Most of the single moms I hear about now and days are these middle class older woman popping out babies with no husband. Half of these women now and days don't even want to get married first. They want to have babies and live together without ever being married.
But let's run down just SOME of the celebrity women who were never married to their baby daddy. Tell me if they were poor. You know this your specialty:
Kourtney Kardashian
Minnie Driver
Kate Moss
Padma Lakshmi
Jamie Lynn Spears
Vanessa Paradis
Bridget Moynahan
they're not old either. jeeeez.
we can look online sources to find the middle age range. some sources say 35. some say 40.
A young woman below the age of conception would be under 21.
click to expand
oh my god. doctors even say it's much healthier for women to have children at least in their 20s and even below 35. but never in their teenaged years.
because they have much of a likelihood of having a child with serious disability just as a woman in her 40s and 50s would.
Posted by Foxlol now that i re-read, it does sound bad. *smh*Posted by lisabethur8That creeped me out a bit. Maybe it's the wording.
so we were at a party earlier this evening and we were all talking about a certain guy who had left the party, and he LOVES to get with women who have children, babies, ect.
It sounded as if he would get with them because they have children/babies.
Lolclick to expand
ok well i'm not eloquent at words. it's hard for me to communicate this unless i'm writing a story. ( i lack air in my chart so i have no eloquency, it's WORSE in person) i'm just glad my family, my husband gets me.
@gemoodye, where are you living? in the U.S.? east west?
@gemoodye, where are you living? in the U.S.? east west?
Posted by KodakPosted by lisabethur8The world doesn't work like that? I'm not saying it HAS to be anything. I'm saying in my opinion, the best chance of longevity and happiness is common ground.Posted by KodakPosted by lisabethur8Honestly. The BEST way in my opinion. You have kids, he has kids. You both know how your worlds operate. You both have that understanding of the position you are in. You are more likely to blend because you both know what must be done in order to have a successful relationship with the spouse and the kids.
so we were at a party earlier this evening and we were all talking about a certain guy who had left the party, and he LOVES to get with women who have children, babies, ect.
he just is so sweet. The women in the group were all, soooo damn sweet, including me. It IS really.
that is a very special man indeed.
so the question is,
would you, single males, date a woman with children?
why and why not?
be honest.
http://halloftheblackdragon.com/reel/the-dos-and-donts-of-dating-a-woman-with-children/
and what type of man do you envision that loves and cares for a young woman or middle aged woman with children?? babies or teenaged children ect.
If one of the other party doesn't have kids. Be prepared for a lot of frustration.
yes i realize that, but the world doesn't work like that. it's not black and white, that you just have children with your one partner.
it's just so unrealistic when i see around me. and these people seem really happy when they found someone.
click to expand
i don't think so.
I've seen too many couples researching, reading, that they have both what you mentioned and still divorced, or unhappy and had affairs, or live apart. ect.
Posted by lisabethur8Ok Lisa.Posted by KodakPosted by lisabethur8The world doesn't work like that? I'm not saying it HAS to be anything. I'm saying in my opinion, the best chance of longevity and happiness is common ground.Posted by KodakPosted by lisabethur8Honestly. The BEST way in my opinion. You have kids, he has kids. You both know how your worlds operate. You both have that understanding of the position you are in. You are more likely to blend because you both know what must be done in order to have a successful relationship with the spouse and the kids.
so we were at a party earlier this evening and we were all talking about a certain guy who had left the party, and he LOVES to get with women who have children, babies, ect.
he just is so sweet. The women in the group were all, soooo damn sweet, including me. It IS really.
that is a very special man indeed.
so the question is,
would you, single males, date a woman with children?
why and why not?
be honest.
http://halloftheblackdragon.com/reel/the-dos-and-donts-of-dating-a-woman-with-children/
and what type of man do you envision that loves and cares for a young woman or middle aged woman with children?? babies or teenaged children ect.
If one of the other party doesn't have kids. Be prepared for a lot of frustration.
yes i realize that, but the world doesn't work like that. it's not black and white, that you just have children with your one partner.
it's just so unrealistic when i see around me. and these people seem really happy when they found someone.
i don't think so.
I've seen too many couples researching, reading, that they have both what you mentioned and still divorced, or unhappy and had affairs, or live apart. ect.
click to expand
Posted by Capri-sunoh ok i just wondered cause you quoted her on that comment.Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Capri-sunwhy do you and koniuchaa think that? i honestly want to know.Posted by KoniuchaaCute picture 🙂
Pretty sure OP is trolling.
I don't think anything. I was just telling her that her picture looks nice.
click to expand
she thought i was trolling, when i observed something that happened last night, with my mother in law. she too mentioned, actually her and two other women mentioned it and i agreed with them that it's very sweet.
Posted by Capri-suni can see this too.Posted by KodakPosted by lisabethur8Honestly. The BEST way in my opinion. You have kids, he has kids. You both know how your worlds operate. You both have that understanding of the position you are in. You are more likely to blend because you both know what must be done in order to have a successful relationship with the spouse and the kids.
so we were at a party earlier this evening and we were all talking about a certain guy who had left the party, and he LOVES to get with women who have children, babies, ect.
he just is so sweet. The women in the group were all, soooo damn sweet, including me. It IS really.
that is a very special man indeed.
so the question is,
would you, single males, date a woman with children?
why and why not?
be honest.
http://halloftheblackdragon.com/reel/the-dos-and-donts-of-dating-a-woman-with-children/
and what type of man do you envision that loves and cares for a young woman or middle aged woman with children?? babies or teenaged children ect.
If one of the other party doesn't have kids. Be prepared for a lot of frustration.
I agree with this. I also view dating a man without kids like does he really know what I go through and what he's signing up for. Parenting takes patience and unless you've been there yourself it is hard for me to imagine someone having the ability to love my children as his own if he's never had any.
click to expand
Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Capri-suni can see this too.Posted by KodakPosted by lisabethur8Honestly. The BEST way in my opinion. You have kids, he has kids. You both know how your worlds operate. You both have that understanding of the position you are in. You are more likely to blend because you both know what must be done in order to have a successful relationship with the spouse and the kids.
so we were at a party earlier this evening and we were all talking about a certain guy who had left the party, and he LOVES to get with women who have children, babies, ect.
he just is so sweet. The women in the group were all, soooo damn sweet, including me. It IS really.
that is a very special man indeed.
so the question is,
would you, single males, date a woman with children?
why and why not?
be honest.
http://halloftheblackdragon.com/reel/the-dos-and-donts-of-dating-a-woman-with-children/
and what type of man do you envision that loves and cares for a young woman or middle aged woman with children?? babies or teenaged children ect.
If one of the other party doesn't have kids. Be prepared for a lot of frustration.
I agree with this. I also view dating a man without kids like does he really know what I go through and what he's signing up for. Parenting takes patience and unless you've been there yourself it is hard for me to imagine someone having the ability to love my children as his own if he's never had any.
click to expand
Posted by lisabethur8I'm in the U.S., west coast, one of the lowest crime rates in the country, less than 3% below the poverty line, average median household income of $ 89,000, 40% college educated, 90% high school graduation rate, and low cost of living. Basically a safe, suburban, middle class area. Lots of good men and none so far not interested once I tell them I have four kids.
ok well i'm not eloquent at words. it's hard for me to communicate this unless i'm writing a story. ( i lack air in my chart so i have no eloquency, it's WORSE in person) i'm just glad my family, my husband gets me.
@gemoodye, where are you living? in the U.S.? east west?
n see every situation. i'm highly mutable so what can I say? *shrug* I like to see people's perspectives and how they live, how they define happiness, ect.Posted by Gemoodeye1oh then that's different than say if you lived in the mid west, I read that over there you can buy a house really cheap, and the average income is much lower, but also the average house to buy is very low too.Posted by lisabethur8I'm in the U.S., west coast, one of the lowest crime rates in the country, less than 3% below the poverty line, average median household income of $ 89,000, 40% college educated, 90% high school graduation rate, and low cost of living. Basically a safe, suburban, middle class area. Lots of good men and none so far not interested once I tell them I have four kids.
ok well i'm not eloquent at words. it's hard for me to communicate this unless i'm writing a story. ( i lack air in my chart so i have no eloquency, it's WORSE in person) i'm just glad my family, my husband gets me.
@gemoodye, where are you living? in the U.S.? east west?
click to expand
@gemoodeye1,
Lots of good men and none so far not interested once I tell them I have four kids. "
ooh I bet they get wide eyed and turn around.
Lots of good men and none so far not interested once I tell them I have four kids. "
ooh I bet they get wide eyed and turn around.
Posted by AriesLoveuh yes I know that, from reading sources too.Posted by lisabethur8No you're just jumping from subject matter to subject matter and not making much sense.
@arieslove, i think your message and my message are getting MIXED.
There are single mothers---some married, some divorced, some never been married, some poor, middle class, upper class and even celebrities.
There are also some that have it under control and some that don't. Just like there are married people who can't even take care of their kids that's why social workers come and take them. Parents strung out on drugs, broke, or in abusive situations.
Point---all single mothers are not 16 and poor.
click to expand
Posted by lisabethur8Yes in the Midwest that is pretty true. Here the housing is very affordable but if you are educated (which is very much an option for hose that want it), with no criminal history and solid work experience you can make a very good living as well.
@Kodak, I can see every situation. i'm highly mutable so what can I say? *shrug* I like to see people's perspectives and how they live, how they define happiness, ect.Posted by Gemoodeye1oh then that's different than say if you lived in the mid west, I read that over there you can buy a house really cheap, and the average income is much lower, but also the average house to buy is very low too.Posted by lisabethur8I'm in the U.S., west coast, one of the lowest crime rates in the country, less than 3% below the poverty line, average median household income of $ 89,000, 40% college educated, 90% high school graduation rate, and low cost of living. Basically a safe, suburban, middle class area. Lots of good men and none so far not interested once I tell them I have four kids.
ok well i'm not eloquent at words. it's hard for me to communicate this unless i'm writing a story. ( i lack air in my chart so i have no eloquency, it's WORSE in person) i'm just glad my family, my husband gets me.
@gemoodye, where are you living? in the U.S.? east west?
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Posted by lisabethur8I'm not sure what your intention was by that comment. I'm not saying I am so amazing, just that single motherhood does not stop good men from being interested in pursuing. It comes up almost immediately and they are receptive and not scared, it's never been a deal breaker. I don't feel looked down on or pitied because I have my children. What I, as a woman bring to the table in dating or a relationship is what the potential in dating is based on. I'm sure there are men out there who are not interested in dating me or any woman with kids but I'm saying it's not rare like you're saying and that when conversation initiates (usually online dating) that hasn't stopped me from having offers for dates, nor ever made someone break things off with me after we have been dating.
@gemoodeye1,
Lots of good men and none so far not interested once I tell them I have four kids. "
ooh I bet they get wide eyed and turn around.
Posted by AriesLoveAgreed. Many times people base their assumptions on the bubble in which they live or what they read, or their own personal prejudices and judgment. If people are open minded then forums like these can help to see that there are many different scenarios and life style s and hopefully not be so ignorant about something they have never lived or experienced themself.Posted by Gemoodeye1I'm telling you it's a lot of ignorant people on DXP. They will try to tell you how YOUR life is. What you can, cannot, do, do not, will, will not have. They no nothing about you or your life. They base everything off of assumptions, how they grew up, or what they see around them. Especially those living in other continents with different cultures. All I can say is they need to travel and get out more.Posted by lisabethur8I'm in the U.S., west coast, one of the lowest crime rates in the country, less than 3% below the poverty line, average median household income of $ 89,000, 40% college educated, 90% high school graduation rate, and low cost of living. Basically a safe, suburban, middle class area. Lots of good men and none so far not interested once I tell them I have four kids.
ok well i'm not eloquent at words. it's hard for me to communicate this unless i'm writing a story. ( i lack air in my chart so i have no eloquency, it's WORSE in person) i'm just glad my family, my husband gets me.
@gemoodye, where are you living? in the U.S.? east west?
click to expand
Posted by Gemoodeye1Posted by lisabethur8I'm not sure what your intention was by that comment. I'm not saying I am so amazing, just that single motherhood does not stop good men from being interested in pursuing. It comes up almost immediately and they are receptive and not scared, it's never been a deal breaker. I don't feel looked down on or pitied because I have my children. What I, as a woman bring to the table in dating or a relationship is what the potential in dating is based on. I'm sure there are men out there who are not interested in dating me or any woman with kids but I'm saying it's not rare like you're saying and that when conversation initiates (usually online dating) that hasn't stopped me from having offers for dates, nor ever made someone break things off with me after we have been dating.
@gemoodeye1,
Lots of good men and none so far not interested once I tell them I have four kids. "
ooh I bet they get wide eyed and turn around.
click to expand
I was imagining how men are generally, because a lot of men would be, O___O holy cow!!! I don't have the money/finances to take care of her and her children, or if he is not thinking financially, he is thinking, "Holy cow!!! I don't want the responsibility"
but like I witnessed, there are men out there of course, plenty i'm sure, that would love to be with a woman with children.
Posted by AriesLovewell, its mostly the women who are answering, but I see a few men posting.Posted by lisabethur8Ok here's some more to readPosted by AriesLoveuh yes I know that, from reading sources too.Posted by lisabethur8No you're just jumping from subject matter to subject matter and not making much sense.
@arieslove, i think your message and my message are getting MIXED.
There are single mothers---some married, some divorced, some never been married, some poor, middle class, upper class and even celebrities.
There are also some that have it under control and some that don't. Just like there are married people who can't even take care of their kids that's why social workers come and take them. Parents strung out on drugs, broke, or in abusive situations.
Point---all single mothers are not 16 and poor.
http://singleparents.about.com/od/legalissues/p/portrait.htm
http://www.wealthysinglemommy.com/single-mom-statistics/
https://singlemotherguide.com/single-mother-statistics/
click to expand
I wanted to see what men thought of women with children and if they are single, would they date a single mother?
edit -
but I also liked it that a lot of women jumped in.
if I were a single mother, I would be sad and heartbroken if no man wanted me because of me being with a child.
Posted by Arielle83I get this general vibe from reading sources online, even from men who are millionaries youtube, or even articles. that men don't want a self-made woman. They want a woman who is poor/middle class.
One of my gfs, another expat, moved to oz from canada, just like me. Met a guy who swept her off her feet.
They married, had a child. Things were great for years. Now she's 36, has a 5 year old son and has her own business. Came to oz with her own money. Went back to school to update her skills.
Her spouse started turning abusive. Nasty verbal abuse. Seems domestic violence against women is on the rise down here. Maybe it's the drinking culture etcetera but who knows. Men don't always like a self made woman. They let themselves feel emasculated.
She had her own account and money so she left. Divorced.
She set herself up so she can raise her child and hired others to run her business.
The thing is women need to prepare for the worst and hope for the best. It's naive to think any man would "save" you. You need to be able to "save" yourself.
She's guarded with men who she dates. Doesn't introduce to her child off hand at all.
It's too suss these days.
There is pedophile shit in the news everyday.
And yes she's more open to single dads.
kind of like Matt Damon marrying below his status, a woman who is a former bartender or waitress.
he doesn't care. And he could have married plenty of women in Hollywood or even a foreign actress.
Posted by Capri-sunPosted by lisabethur8Posted by AriesLovewell, its mostly the women who are answering, but I see a few men posting.Posted by lisabethur8Ok here's some more to readPosted by AriesLoveuh yes I know that, from reading sources too.Posted by lisabethur8No you're just jumping from subject matter to subject matter and not making much sense.
@arieslove, i think your message and my message are getting MIXED.
There are single mothers---some married, some divorced, some never been married, some poor, middle class, upper class and even celebrities.
There are also some that have it under control and some that don't. Just like there are married people who can't even take care of their kids that's why social workers come and take them. Parents strung out on drugs, broke, or in abusive situations.
Point---all single mothers are not 16 and poor.
http://singleparents.about.com/od/legalissues/p/portrait.htm
http://www.wealthysinglemommy.com/single-mom-statistics/
https://singlemotherguide.com/single-mother-statistics/
I wanted to see what men thought of women with children and if they are single, would they date a single mother?
edit -
but I also liked it that a lot of women jumped in.
if I were a single mother, I would be sad and heartbroken if no man wanted me because of me being with a child.
I think @rabidtalker did a thread "would you date someone with children" or "how do you feel about dating someone with children"
Might find more male responses there. From what I've seen most men on dxp don't have children so I think most that no
click to expand
oh ok, i'll check it out.
Posted by AriesLovethere's someone for everyone. I think the problem is that no one wants to settle. and of course no one should settle. But then the other person they want doesnt'want them. ect. unrequited love runs wild.Posted by lisabethur8Yes you would also be delusional because that's not the case for the majority of single mothers.Posted by AriesLovewell, its mostly the women who are answering, but I see a few men posting.Posted by lisabethur8Ok here's some more to readPosted by AriesLoveuh yes I know that, from reading sources too.Posted by lisabethur8No you're just jumping from subject matter to subject matter and not making much sense.
@arieslove, i think your message and my message are getting MIXED.
There are single mothers---some married, some divorced, some never been married, some poor, middle class, upper class and even celebrities.
There are also some that have it under control and some that don't. Just like there are married people who can't even take care of their kids that's why social workers come and take them. Parents strung out on drugs, broke, or in abusive situations.
Point---all single mothers are not 16 and poor.
http://singleparents.about.com/od/legalissues/p/portrait.htm
http://www.wealthysinglemommy.com/single-mom-statistics/
https://singlemotherguide.com/single-mother-statistics/
I wanted to see what men thought of women with children and if they are single, would they date a single mother?
edit -
but I also liked it that a lot of women jumped in.
if I were a single mother, I would be sad and heartbroken if no man wanted me because of me being with a child.
What's sad is there are young woman with no kids, never married, jobs, education and STILL no man wants them.
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Posted by lisabethur8To be honest, when I was just starting to date I thought that would be the reaction as well, because logically four children are a big responsibility. Even when men with no children would show interest I would assume for them that they could not handle it, and only dated men with children. I will say there was more common ground and I was more comfortable with single dads. But, I started to realize that maybe I should be more open to finding out more about the person and that it shouldn't be a deal breaker because I could be missing out on someone great. The man I'm dating now has no children and I have brought it up a few times with him but it doesn't deter him. He is financially stable and loves spending time with me, loves children and his best friend (female) was the one to tell me how great he is with them and that he's ready to settle down again just hadn't met the right person. He loves hearing about my kids and being involved in my life. He knew up front that I'm ready to find someone long term and eventually want to get married again.Posted by Gemoodeye1Posted by lisabethur8I'm not sure what your intention was by that comment. I'm not saying I am so amazing, just that single motherhood does not stop good men from being interested in pursuing. It comes up almost immediately and they are receptive and not scared, it's never been a deal breaker. I don't feel looked down on or pitied because I have my children. What I, as a woman bring to the table in dating or a relationship is what the potential in dating is based on. I'm sure there are men out there who are not interested in dating me or any woman with kids but I'm saying it's not rare like you're saying and that when conversation initiates (usually online dating) that hasn't stopped me from having offers for dates, nor ever made someone break things off with me after we have been dating.
@gemoodeye1,
Lots of good men and none so far not interested once I tell them I have four kids. "
ooh I bet they get wide eyed and turn around.
I was imagining how men are generally, because a lot of men would be, O___O holy cow!!! I don't have the money/finances to take care of her and her children, or if he is not thinking financially, he is thinking, "Holy cow!!! I don't want the responsibility"
but like I witnessed, there are men out there of course, plenty i'm sure, that would love to be with a woman with children.
click to expand
My best friend also divorced with 4 children and met a wonderful man who had no children and they chose to have another together. She has her doctorate degree and is successful in her professional career. She was the first to tell me to not assume a single man with no kids couldn't handle or wouldn't want to be with a single mom.
Posted by Capri-sunPosted by lisabethur8Posted by AriesLovewell, its mostly the women who are answering, but I see a few men posting.Posted by lisabethur8Ok here's some more to readPosted by AriesLoveuh yes I know that, from reading sources too.Posted by lisabethur8No you're just jumping from subject matter to subject matter and not making much sense.
@arieslove, i think your message and my message are getting MIXED.
There are single mothers---some married, some divorced, some never been married, some poor, middle class, upper class and even celebrities.
There are also some that have it under control and some that don't. Just like there are married people who can't even take care of their kids that's why social workers come and take them. Parents strung out on drugs, broke, or in abusive situations.
Point---all single mothers are not 16 and poor.
http://singleparents.about.com/od/legalissues/p/portrait.htm
http://www.wealthysinglemommy.com/single-mom-statistics/
https://singlemotherguide.com/single-mother-statistics/
I wanted to see what men thought of women with children and if they are single, would they date a single mother?
edit -
but I also liked it that a lot of women jumped in.
if I were a single mother, I would be sad and heartbroken if no man wanted me because of me being with a child.
I think @rabidtalker did a thread "would you date someone with children" or "how do you feel about dating someone with children"
Might find more male responses there. From what I've seen most men on dxp don't have children so I think most that no
click to expand
tried to do a search here, no topic exists, probably got deleted.
Posted by AriesLovewell the woman in question, that we witnessed doesn't have any of that, no car, no home, lives with parents, or now she is moved into with the new guy. no job either. she is still young though, maybe from early to mid twenties. but I think with his help she will be okay now.Posted by lisabethur8But alot of single moms DONT need the next man to take care of kids she had with her ex. That's the fathers responsibility. Where are you from where you think it's just the mothers job and her new partner? Your thinking is all wrong.Posted by Gemoodeye1Posted by lisabethur8I'm not sure what your intention was by that comment. I'm not saying I am so amazing, just that single motherhood does not stop good men from being interested in pursuing. It comes up almost immediately and they are receptive and not scared, it's never been a deal breaker. I don't feel looked down on or pitied because I have my children. What I, as a woman bring to the table in dating or a relationship is what the potential in dating is based on. I'm sure there are men out there who are not interested in dating me or any woman with kids but I'm saying it's not rare like you're saying and that when conversation initiates (usually online dating) that hasn't stopped me from having offers for dates, nor ever made someone break things off with me after we have been dating.
@gemoodeye1,
Lots of good men and none so far not interested once I tell them I have four kids. "
ooh I bet they get wide eyed and turn around.
I was imagining how men are generally, because a lot of men would be, O___O holy cow!!! I don't have the money/finances to take care of her and her children, or if he is not thinking financially, he is thinking, "Holy cow!!! I don't want the responsibility"
but like I witnessed, there are men out there of course, plenty i'm sure, that would love to be with a woman with children.
Why would a single mom need a man to help her with her kids if she was doing it before she met him. I would hope she has a house, car, food, clothes and bills paid before she met the new guy. If he comes along and wants to help that's on him.
click to expand
Posted by AriesLoveI'm sure she is not alone in the assumption that all single moms are looking for a new daddy. I agree that many of us are doing fine on our own but like most people, would like to find that person that brings joy to our life and is a great partner. Maybe that's why I don't have trouble dating..I have a good job, and my kids are with their dad half the time. I am not looking to replace their dad, I'm looking for someone that I connect with and I trust my own judgment enough that the characteristics I look for in a man would mean he would be someone I could see getting along with my children someday.Posted by lisabethur8But alot of single moms DONT need the next man to take care of kids she had with her ex. That's the fathers responsibility. Where are you from where you think it's just the mothers job and her new partner? Your thinking is all wrong.Posted by Gemoodeye1Posted by lisabethur8I'm not sure what your intention was by that comment. I'm not saying I am so amazing, just that single motherhood does not stop good men from being interested in pursuing. It comes up almost immediately and they are receptive and not scared, it's never been a deal breaker. I don't feel looked down on or pitied because I have my children. What I, as a woman bring to the table in dating or a relationship is what the potential in dating is based on. I'm sure there are men out there who are not interested in dating me or any woman with kids but I'm saying it's not rare like you're saying and that when conversation initiates (usually online dating) that hasn't stopped me from having offers for dates, nor ever made someone break things off with me after we have been dating.
@gemoodeye1,
Lots of good men and none so far not interested once I tell them I have four kids. "
ooh I bet they get wide eyed and turn around.
I was imagining how men are generally, because a lot of men would be, O___O holy cow!!! I don't have the money/finances to take care of her and her children, or if he is not thinking financially, he is thinking, "Holy cow!!! I don't want the responsibility"
but like I witnessed, there are men out there of course, plenty i'm sure, that would love to be with a woman with children.
Why would a single mom need a man to help her with her kids if she was doing it before she met him. I would hope she has a house, car, food, clothes and bills paid before she met the new guy. If he comes along and wants to help that's on him.
click to expand
Posted by AriesLoveI see what you mean, honestly I do.Posted by Gemoodeye1Yes and I think that's why it's not hard for some single women to get on with their life and find new partners. Not all are looking for "new daddy's". That doesn't even sound right lol. I would NEVER try and replace my kids father that's the dumbest most cruel thing nor would I put myself or kids out there like some bumbs.Posted by AriesLoveI'm sure she is not alone in the assumption that all single moms are looking for a new daddy. I agree that many of us are doing fine on our own but like most people, would like to find that person that brings joy to our life and is a great partner. Maybe that's why I don't have trouble dating..I have a good job, and my kids are with their dad half the time. I am not looking to replace their dad, I'm looking for someone that I connect with and I trust my own judgment enough that the characteristics I look for in a man would mean he would be someone I could see getting along with my children someday.Posted by lisabethur8But alot of single moms DONT need the next man to take care of kids she had with her ex. That's the fathers responsibility. Where are you from where you think it's just the mothers job and her new partner? Your thinking is all wrong.Posted by Gemoodeye1Posted by lisabethur8I'm not sure what your intention was by that comment. I'm not saying I am so amazing, just that single motherhood does not stop good men from being interested in pursuing. It comes up almost immediately and they are receptive and not scared, it's never been a deal breaker. I don't feel looked down on or pitied because I have my children. What I, as a woman bring to the table in dating or a relationship is what the potential in dating is based on. I'm sure there are men out there who are not interested in dating me or any woman with kids but I'm saying it's not rare like you're saying and that when conversation initiates (usually online dating) that hasn't stopped me from having offers for dates, nor ever made someone break things off with me after we have been dating.
@gemoodeye1,
Lots of good men and none so far not interested once I tell them I have four kids. "
ooh I bet they get wide eyed and turn around.
I was imagining how men are generally, because a lot of men would be, O___O holy cow!!! I don't have the money/finances to take care of her and her children, or if he is not thinking financially, he is thinking, "Holy cow!!! I don't want the responsibility"
but like I witnessed, there are men out there of course, plenty i'm sure, that would love to be with a woman with children.
Why would a single mom need a man to help her with her kids if she was doing it before she met him. I would hope she has a house, car, food, clothes and bills paid before she met the new guy. If he comes along and wants to help that's on him.
Of course you want your new partner to respect and love your child but that should be an automatic if they love you and want to be with you. And if you live together you share household responsibilities but that's with any woman he gets with. But hopefully most women are receiving support for their children so it shouldn't be an extra burden on the new guy anyway.
click to expand
but there are really good guys out there that do NOT mind spending their hard earned money on the woman if they are poor. they love it. it gives them joy.
I don't know why men have to follow some code of system, if they love someone.
even in the video of millioniares, 80% would RATHER marry below. because they are not afraid to take risks.s
it even said that the women millionaires are the scared ones to go after men who are poor or middle class. because they are not risk takers. And they are the ones who ask for pre nup majority of the time.
it is the women who are more afraid of risks, than men I notice. 'but that's to be expected, as high risks are kind of a male dominanted thing in general.
Posted by lisabethur8There a lots of people in general who love to help other people so I'm sure in dating that can make a man feel needed. A man who specifically looks for a woman who needs help, I would question his own self esteem to not be comfortable dating a woman already independent though. But, I could see a man meeting a humble, sweet woman and falling for her and wanting to make her life better too. Every situation and motive is different. To each their own.Posted by AriesLoveI see what you mean, honestly I do.Posted by Gemoodeye1Yes and I think that's why it's not hard for some single women to get on with their life and find new partners. Not all are looking for "new daddy's". That doesn't even sound right lol. I would NEVER try and replace my kids father that's the dumbest most cruel thing nor would I put myself or kids out there like some bumbs.Posted by AriesLoveI'm sure she is not alone in the assumption that all single moms are looking for a new daddy. I agree that many of us are doing fine on our own but like most people, would like to find that person that brings joy to our life and is a great partner. Maybe that's why I don't have trouble dating..I have a good job, and my kids are with their dad half the time. I am not looking to replace their dad, I'm looking for someone that I connect with and I trust my own judgment enough that the characteristics I look for in a man would mean he would be someone I could see getting along with my children someday.Posted by lisabethur8But alot of single moms DONT need the next man to take care of kids she had with her ex. That's the fathers responsibility. Where are you from where you think it's just the mothers job and her new partner? Your thinking is all wrong.Posted by Gemoodeye1Posted by lisabethur8I'm not sure what your intention was by that comment. I'm not saying I am so amazing, just that single motherhood does not stop good men from being interested in pursuing. It comes up almost immediately and they are receptive and not scared, it's never been a deal breaker. I don't feel looked down on or pitied because I have my children. What I, as a woman bring to the table in dating or a relationship is what the potential in dating is based on. I'm sure there are men out there who are not interested in dating me or any woman with kids but I'm saying it's not rare like you're saying and that when conversation initiates (usually online dating) that hasn't stopped me from having offers for dates, nor ever made someone break things off with me after we have been dating.
@gemoodeye1,
Lots of good men and none so far not interested once I tell them I have four kids. "
ooh I bet they get wide eyed and turn around.
I was imagining how men are generally, because a lot of men would be, O___O holy cow!!! I don't have the money/finances to take care of her and her children, or if he is not thinking financially, he is thinking, "Holy cow!!! I don't want the responsibility"
but like I witnessed, there are men out there of course, plenty i'm sure, that would love to be with a woman with children.
Why would a single mom need a man to help her with her kids if she was doing it before she met him. I would hope she has a house, car, food, clothes and bills paid before she met the new guy. If he comes along and wants to help that's on him.
Of course you want your new partner to respect and love your child but that should be an automatic if they love you and want to be with you. And if you live together you share household responsibilities but that's with any woman he gets with. But hopefully most women are receiving support for their children so it shouldn't be an extra burden on the new guy anyway.
but there are really good guys out there that do NOT mind spending their hard earned money on the woman if they are poor. they love it. it gives them joy.
I don't know why men have to follow some code of system, if they love someone.
even in the video of millioniares, 80% would RATHER marry below. because they are not afraid to take risks.s
it even said that the women millionaires are the scared ones to go after men who are poor or middle class. because they are not risk takers. And they are the ones who ask for pre nup majority of the time.click to expand
I think if I were a millionaire I would share it, but then it would be tough cause I don't know if they would love me for me, and not for my money.
but for men who do that, they don't care. They have the power so they're like so what?? to me, that is sooo incredibly confident and sexy for a man who doesn't give a shit what people think or what he should do. I love confidence in a man and if he's a weak ass millionaire type. barf.
but for men who do that, they don't care. They have the power so they're like so what?? to me, that is sooo incredibly confident and sexy for a man who doesn't give a shit what people think or what he should do. I love confidence in a man and if he's a weak ass millionaire type. barf.
and honestly— why would you question his self esteem? the reason why he's reached the top is that he got to have that drive and ambition to do what he wants.
he's wealthy for a reason, and he's not a dummy.
he's wealthy for a reason, and he's not a dummy.
The post I made a while back about kids is here:
https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/relationships/how-do-you-feel-about-dating-someone-with-kids-6729224/
https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/relationships/how-do-you-feel-about-dating-someone-with-kids-6729224/
Posted by rabidtalkeroh thanks rabid!!
The post I made a while back about kids is here:
https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/relationships/how-do-you-feel-about-dating-someone-with-kids-6729224/
Posted by Capri-sunthanks! I got it already, it was quite short. lolPosted by lisabethur8https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/relationships/how-do-you-feel-about-dating-someone-with-kids-6729224/Posted by Capri-sunPosted by lisabethur8Posted by AriesLovewell, its mostly the women who are answering, but I see a few men posting.Posted by lisabethur8Ok here's some more to readPosted by AriesLoveuh yes I know that, from reading sources too.Posted by lisabethur8No you're just jumping from subject matter to subject matter and not making much sense.
@arieslove, i think your message and my message are getting MIXED.
There are single mothers---some married, some divorced, some never been married, some poor, middle class, upper class and even celebrities.
There are also some that have it under control and some that don't. Just like there are married people who can't even take care of their kids that's why social workers come and take them. Parents strung out on drugs, broke, or in abusive situations.
Point---all single mothers are not 16 and poor.
http://singleparents.about.com/od/legalissues/p/portrait.htm
http://www.wealthysinglemommy.com/single-mom-statistics/
https://singlemotherguide.com/single-mother-statistics/
I wanted to see what men thought of women with children and if they are single, would they date a single mother?
edit -
but I also liked it that a lot of women jumped in.
if I were a single mother, I would be sad and heartbroken if no man wanted me because of me being with a child.
I think @rabidtalker did a thread "would you date someone with children" or "how do you feel about dating someone with children"
Might find more male responses there. From what I've seen most men on dxp don't have children so I think most that no
tried to do a search here, no topic exists, probably got deleted.
click to expand
Oh, I have dated a Libra woman with a kid before. Will NEVER ever do it again. No matter what her sign is. I have a feeling that the "nice" guys that is dating women with kids doesn't have many options.
Also, it's never a good thing when women refer to you as the "nice" guy. It's almost like code talk for undesirable. The main reasons why I won't ever do it again are the following:
* Always another guy in the picture
* Added responsibility (I simply don't want to take care of some other guys derpy looking ass kid)
* Drama (there is always some baby mama drama)
* Emotional baggage (it always creeps into the relationship no matter how much she tries to curve it)
* Puss is torn up (lets face it, once a women has a kid, it's never the same)
There are many more pitfalls that I don't feel like listing you. But you all get the gist.
Also, it's never a good thing when women refer to you as the "nice" guy. It's almost like code talk for undesirable. The main reasons why I won't ever do it again are the following:
* Always another guy in the picture
* Added responsibility (I simply don't want to take care of some other guys derpy looking ass kid)
* Drama (there is always some baby mama drama)
* Emotional baggage (it always creeps into the relationship no matter how much she tries to curve it)
* Puss is torn up (lets face it, once a women has a kid, it's never the same)
There are many more pitfalls that I don't feel like listing you. But you all get the gist.
Posted by TeddyBearMDthis guy at the party is a really really nice guy too. but he is also a very decent human being.
Oh, I have dated a Libra woman with a kid before. Will NEVER ever do it again. No matter what her sign is. I have a feeling that the "nice" guys that is dating women with kids doesn't have many options.
Also, it's never a good thing when women refer to you as the "nice" guy. It's almost like code talk for undesirable. The main reasons why I won't ever do it again are the following:
* Always another guy in the picture
* Added responsibility (I simply don't want to take care of some other guys derpy looking ass kid)
* Drama (there is always some baby mama drama)
* Emotional baggage (it always creeps into the relationship no matter how much she tries to curve it)
* Puss is torn up (lets face it, once a women has a kid, it's never the same)
There are many more pitfalls that I don't feel like listing you. But you all get the gist.
A lot of women would love that, but then again I notice not a lot would not either.
and, anyway....
if you dated one, then you are a nice guy in truth. Why are you being so mean about it now? must have left a sour note on your experience huh?
and the way you talk about having to care about another baby if it's not your own, you sound really embittered about the experience.
edit - anyway thanks, I get the gist by the way...
I bet if you had a better experience, you would be happier.
unfortunately that woman gave you a sour note.
It was a bad experience. No doubt about that. I wouldn't classify myself as a "nice guy" for doing what I did. I was just a young guy, who didn't have many options and took whatever I could get, even if it came with a kid as the package deal.
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