ANOTHER VIRGO-SCORPIO DILEMMA (Page 3)

Yes, S-I-L I am burning up with desire, in more ways than one! lol

Yes, I am the type that I want answers, and I want them now, specially when it comes to love/relationships, and I must admit that when I get the answers I am no longer interested, my intensity changes!

Oh, what a mess! lol

I need to learn to be less intense, can I, at my age? 😉

And yes, I have an intuition that is scary. I have a gift to read people's future and many times my own, but at times, I do not want to trust that intuition and put it aside...

Gosh, if my Virgo man only knew how much thought I am giving to "our relationship" he would probably be shocked because even though he knows I am interested in him and he knows I like him a lot, he does not know how this whole situation is driving me CRAZY! lol

A male friend just sent me this message...

"Trust me. I'm a guy. He's got something going on with someone else. Guys will move heaven and earth to be with a woman they really want to be with. Seriously, NOTHING will stand in their way. If I were you, I'd not contact him anymore and move on with your life."

yes they will. there's no inhibitions. no excuses. they value the worth of a woman wherein they earn it with hard work. sometimes women must learn how to think like a man.

vgurl and what would be the result of thinking like a man?

you'll never know.. .. .. ..

S-I-L forgot to tell you... HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND! full of fun and joy!

I am assuming its a weekend a due! You and your Virgo man! 😉

Hi S-I-L,

How have you been?

Hope you have a nice weekend!

Here I am thinking some more but first let me thank each of you for reading me in my sharing/venting and thank you also for giving me feed back...

Let's get to business now! lol

Let's assume that maybe my Virgo man isn't playing a game, but he is definitely not indecisive, right? Him canceling the exclusivity on me makes that very clear, doesn't it?

In seeing only me, as in exclusivity, he can't see anyone else. Being exclusive only changes that, right? I do not know if he's not seeing someone yet, (he claims he is not) but he's keeping the options open for someone else that he may or may not have met yet. Don't you all think?

Part of me likes to believe that maybe he is scare, but now another scenario comes to mind.

My Virgo man maybe was dating someone else, and they stopped dating, then I came into his life and all it is nice and dandy, and thereafter that woman has come back into his life and he wants to date her too, so my Virgo man withdraw the exclusivity, two days later!

If he is playing a game with me, I won't tolerate it. I wonder if he roped me with lovie-dovie actions and gave me a false impression of a future only to backtrack once I started to develop feelings?

Who knows I am just second guessing here, however I am not going to wait for him like I have nothing better to do! I will just give it a little more time and see what happens. If nothing happens soon, I will then use my favorite word when it comes to men that have no potential.... NEXXXT! 😉

Sorry guys, so much in my mind that I am creating so many scenarios! lol I just do not know what to think anymore...

Can you tell I have lots of free time lately? lol Yes, few days off here!

Dyrst, in his eyes, I am the more educated, the one with more money, the better house, the better car, the more traveled, more sophisticated, and blah, bla, blah,.. In few words, the better life style and in reality is true! lol So who knows that may be contributing to his fears!

His distance and his withdraw of the exclusivity, is contributing to mine!

Oh, but it is a binding oral contract. There was an offer and there was an acceptance, and at the time, there was a meeting of the minds. So I could sue him for breach of contract! right, Linda? lol

Dyrst said "Wish my Scorp would write a guide to nabbing a Virgo Male in just 6 months... it's sorely needed!"

Hey Dyrst tell Deb to write it and I will pay her for the first copy, and big bucks, but it must be autographed! lol

And Dyrst how do I do that?

"You're gonna have to throttle back"

And by the way, a more self-assured guy does not exists. Like I said before, I intimidated the hell out of men and then, I am picky as hell, as well. So there is no easy solutions! lol

I wonder why then I have been, for the most part, alone since my divorce, 10 years ago! But it is about time I get the right man in my life. I desire for my Virgo man to be the one. Well, I wonder if it is that what I wish or if it just all this pull that has me upside down! lol

In reality, I do fear that in the long run he may not be able to handle me being "so much more" than him...

PS I also live in a gated community with a guard 24/7. He has not been to my house yet, but he knows where I live and the size of my house, even that it has a swimming pool. He asked me about it and I told him I moved there after my divorce. Gosh, I lived in a Mansion while I was married so I have downsized a lot! lol

Give me Spanish, give me French, give me Italian, but spricken sei doutch? nigth!

Dyrst said "Cut this poor VirGuy some slack. He's not gonna act like other guys. But... isn't that what makes him interesting to you??"

Indeed, I want to cut him all the slack in the world, even though lately I want to cut him other things. Hey, Dyrst are your still the size of grapefruits? lol

Yes, I do like this guy because he seems so honest and sincere, but I am having a difficult time figuring him out, reading him, which it is not like me. 99.9% of the time, I am so good at figuring out people, but with my Virgo man I am stuck that it is why I came to post here in need of S.O.S.

So Dyrst and you'all, I have not answer his text mssg from last nite and I am waiting for him to contact me. Is that a good idea? Just wondering...

"Don't you all think?"

ESCORPIONA, your man is not here reading all these ramblings.

why ask virgo men here what your man thinks?

everything you'll get here are assumptions, conclusions, predictions.

vgurl,

I own My Car, and even though there are others like it, not one is identical to My Car; however, I don't think it's a waste to ask other Audi A4 owners about some issue on mine that's bothering me...



am i talking to you?

vgurl, why are you here?

I love sharing and getting other people's opinions. I love to understand how people think, and now I am interested in finding out how a Virgo male mind operates. Of course at then end, it will be up to me as to what I decide. Further, how the relationship, between my Virgo and I, develops, it will be up to the two of us...

I am really enjoying how everybody is sharing on this thread, including all the languages, so here... Oui, mon cheri, la langue d' amour, c'est la plus dificile de parle!

vgurl, I bet you are rather young...

And by the way , I am asking for everybody's input, not just males...

Do you care to join in, with your opinion? 🙂

you compare a person to a car? of course your car has the same specs like his car.

what makes you 100% sure that the man she have thinks the same way and feels the same way as you do?

Escorpiona: I think your going to drive yourself crazy if you keep dreaming up those scenarious...

He withdrew the exclusivity...and he's the one who suggested it in the first place. Let him go do what he needs to do, back away from the situation, get some air into your head...Go have some fun..don't think and focus on it too much..GO WITH THE FLOW OF THE TIDE..

It will all slip into place..If he likes you, I am sure whatever he's sorting out in his head, he'll be back before you know it...

Remember when you were at school, sittinG in that dreaded maths class and you stared at the clock on the wall wishing it would strike 3pm so you can go home but somehow the hand never moved?...well thats whats happening now..you are WAITING for something to happen and everything will seem magnified by about a gazillion...QUIT THINKING ABOUT IT..

It will be just fine..

I personally don't think Virgos would say such a thing, if they didn't mean it..they stand the risk of looking like total idiots and I don't think I have come across a virgo who would do that to themselves!...LOL

i've said what's my opinion ESCORPIONA.

it'll always be your call no matter what people say.

Escorpiona: I think your going to drive yourself crazy if you keep dreaming up those scenarious...


i concur.

"wheelhomies, el tuyo me sorprende aun mas!"

gracias shaka, entonces nunca diras otra vez que los leones son estupidos, verdad? jeje...

vgurl, I bet you are rather young...



yes, i'm 6 years younger than you and you are older right? so that would mean you know better, right?

feeling a bit self-righteous today vgurl?


self-righteousness = a virgo thing?

Vgurl I do not know any better dear. I just know what I know and that is all I know, c'est tout! 🙂

You must be PMSing! lol So I forgive you... We all have those days! lol

Hey, make light of it. Life is too short not too make the best out of it! And that is LAUGHING!

Carpe Diem.

Hey, make light of it. Life is too short not too make the best out of it! And that is LAUGHING!


you need this line more than i do, dearie.

MissM I am already crazy! lol

Yes, I am going with the flow and making lemonade! I love to make lemonade with the lemons life throws my way.

Life is great and no man is going to make me suffer... I have a full life and here I am sharing some of it with you'all! 😉

Thanks for the advice.

Got lemonade here, does anyone want some? lol

Life is great and no man is going to make me suffer...

you go, girl! 😉

vgurl self-righteous, indeed! 😉

Obessessing . . Scorpio flaw . . really . . just relax and enjoy the man instead of putting undue stress into a problem that doesn't exist. Why Scorpio's do that . . I've no clue.

Sometimes, I think they're bigger worry-worts than Virgo's . . if that's possible, lol

A Total Puzzle!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I continue to be perplexed...

I forwarded an email, with no personal words from me to my Virgo man before I decided that I would not have any more contact from me to him. It was a pretty story about a little girl with leukemia and pure love, titled "The Sandpiper ... to bring you joy! By Ruth Peterson" maybe some of you may have read it. Anyway, my Virgo at 10:33 pm tonite replied telling me as follows:


"Very Beautiful note ____, I really like it, and I guess you knew I would. I'm home and pretty tired, about to go to bed. I do work tomorrow, then will go to my brother's to watch a football game. Tomorrow should not be too bad at work. Let's touch base tomorrow, as I miss talking...
Have a good night my sweetheart,
____"


I do not know what to make out of it. Maybe I am reading too much into his withdraw of the "exclusivity" deal. Who knows! But why could he not say in his e-mail, hey I am going to my brother's to watch (him and his bro a very much into sports, big times) a game, do you care to come along?

(I have met his brother and the wife 4 times and I think they are great people and we hit it off real well. The wife even gave me a gift for Xmas)

But instead he said he will call me during the day (his shift is usually 7 am to 7 pm) since he does not think he will be too busy at work, If he calls, I will not answer the phone. But with call or no call, he is still going to his brother's after work, Well, so he said. I wonder if that is really what he will be doing!

Hey, what football games are on TV tomorrow? lol

I have not seem him since Monday nite, and with all this exclusivity withdrawal we have not been in contact that much. Doesn't he want to see me?

PS Angelina I am awake as well! lol

Women become too needy to men when they put so much emphasis on "worrying" about this stuff: What did he mean? Did I say something? Why did he do that?

Just go with the flow . . enjoy what time you have with this man. If it's not exclusive, so what? You're making yourself sound desperate for his attention. I realize you're not doing it to him, only us . . but, still, men can be intuitive too, and he might be getting these vibes from you . . you might appear emotionally needy to him because you've got your panties in a wad about every little gesture.

Relax . . enjoy . . make the time shared with him something you can look back on and smile and revere . . right now, when you look back, you're seeing "dilemna's" and possible inconsistencies . . he's a human . . he's not gonna be perfect . . but, what can be perfect is the union of two shared hearts in whatever good times there are.

You're making good times sound troublesome . . just enjoy the man. If it's only sometimes . . then what's wrong with that? I'd rather have happy "sometimes" moments with a person I adore, then many moments of nervousness. You're unsure about him, about the two of you, about every little word that comes out of his mouth . . this makes you emotionally needy to men . .

Stop it . . have fun with him . . it doesn't HAVE to be so hard.

His intentions are just to enjoy times with you . . you don't want to reciprocate? You'd rather have more control?

Be happy.

True Virgo or not...

Whether my man just got a case of cold feet, or is stringing me along, or just going at his own pace, makes no difference. Bottom line here is, we are not committed to each other and we can each do whatever we want...

Before I went to bed last, I gave my situation some cold blooded thoughts. I just woke up rested and with a different attitude, que sera, sera!

On the mean time, I am just going to have fun without getting my heart attached. I know it is easier said than done, but once I make up my mind I just let it be, and that is what I have decided.

Sorry guys, but like I said, sometimes my intensity takes the better side of me!

NEXXXT! 😉

Escorp, I tried few times to write to you, but I deleted them before I posted them. Your story is so similar to mine. I hope you really can be like "but once I make up my mind I just let it be, and that is what I have decided". I told myself so many time this way too.
Even he comes back, you will still have pain in the future. Dating a Virgo guy is an endless painful journey until he really commits. But that long journey will kill you before you get the commitment.
Leave him. That is the only way you get your happiness back. There are lots of better men in this world. It is just a matter of timing. I have been bothered by that Virgo for too long and no matter how I like him, I have to give up. Too many self doubts and wondering what I did wrong. I am not me any more. What for?

Escorpiona . . these men are a lot of work . . perhaps all men are,lol, but, Virgo's in particular are their own worst enemies by being so picky. Good women are hard to find, apparantly (assessing this from another topic), and by them being this "conditional" with potential partners, is actually preventing them from finding happiness with this said, "good woman".

Too much work for me, at this stage in life. Who needs that crap, anyway?

I find it very ironic that the male Virgo claims to have emotions under control, when in reality, they are the weakest of all in this department because they HAVE to depend on a woman to determine how they are suppose to feel . . if left up to them . . they cower away and never face the facts of how they actually feel about her.

How is this having control? I don't get it . . hiding isn't controlling . . lol

P, exactly. when they have problems or doubts, they just disappear, hiding somewhere without telling you anything, put you in the dark wondering if you did something wrong. You have to wait restlessly until they are out. They can be sweet one day and next day back to their cave again without telling you what is wrong. Not worth the pain. I can live a better life without the crap.
Even though I have to admit it is painful to leave him.

Thanks Leogl for your advice. I am not going to leave him since there is no leaving to do, we are not a couple, not in my eyes, nor in his. But I am definitely going to just let it be, and see where he goes from here. If he wants to pursue me, it is up to him. I already put enough energies thinking about it in the last 48 hrs, that I am just going on with my life.

Yes, I am still interested in the guy but not agonizing over him anymore!

Angelina, men are the most difficult creatures to understand, even though you would ask them, they would tell you they are rather simple, and that we, women, are the complicate ones, so figure that one out...

But regardless we cannot live without passion and love in our hearts. But for me, no drama, please.

And yes I am a great woman, and it will take a great man to catch me!

So there... lol

"But regardless we cannot live without passion and love in our hearts"

This statement is the most hilarious thing I've ever heard . . well, not ever, but, so far today, anyway. It's a complete contridiction . . it only goes to show that you, Escorpiona, and all others who are standing on the ground that Virgo's are worthy of a relationship from the woman's perspective (mainly, Scorpio females), have no clue as to who you are as women, and what our needs as a woman entails, lol

If you really listen to what everybody has been saying about "working" this man to get him, like, SIL, Dyr's woman romancing him (which he thinks he romanced her, lol, Dyr, that's funny) and other's who have told you how to "get" him to have passion and love.

lol, lol, lol, lol . . think about that . . if you have to MAKE someone feel this .. then they don't . . it is something that wells up inside of you, not something you decide.

You got upset with vgurl, when in reality . . she's the only one who actually had it spot on . . are we talking about a person, or a product?

Ok, let's test drive to see if it "feels" for me, lol

"But regardless we cannot live without passion" . . do you people honestly believe that passion is something you mold? This IS the Virgo . . passion isn't within them . . if you want passion, then you have to have it all yourself and hope it's enough for both of you . . if a person feels passionate about another, then they don't pull away to "think" about it . . passion isn't a thought . . it's a feeling.

This just drives me nuts . . how could anyone woman possibly be happy being with a man who has to DECIDE whether he desires you, or not?

I don't get it . . I don't get any of you women who think this kind of man is a good catch . . life is about "feeling" each other.

Dyrst, I agree with you. His brother is two years younger, but they are really close, and I know he talks everything with him...

When we were talking, Monday nite at dinner, and he told me his brother gave him his blessing, I knew that his brother liked me. My Virgo man said that his brother had met other of his dates. So I am figuring if his brother gave him his blessing (whatever your take is on the meaning) it was positive. Hey, the bro could have said very easily, hey don't date her because so and so is better...

I hope my Virgo man has fun tonite and has a good talk with his brother and his sister in law, who I also think likes me. She even game me a Xmas gift, without really knowing me. So she either likes me or she is just super nice! lol

But now it is not up to his family, nor his brother nor sister in law to like me, but for my Virgo man to move forward with our relationship, whatever that means, and that it's to be seen...

And c'est la vie!

"So I asked about after we started dating, and she told me, "I love you, and I know you don't mean it, but you can be very cold and stuck on yourself." She was ready for me to raise hell (she knows me!), and she put her hand on my mouth to shut me up. She then told me that although I'm one of the gentlest and kindest men she's ever known, that I often see everything centering on ME when it doesn't..."


Bingo . . nobody ever listens to me . . one day . . all of you will look back and go, "Well goddam, she knew what she was talking about."

"Yeah, he thinks before he feels", lol . . Virgo men don't get it and perhaps never will . . passion can't be thought . . I know you think you have passion, all V-men "think" this . . that is the problem.

Stop frigging thinking it because it's NOT a thought, silly goose.

lol, I just laugh my ass off at all of you and sure enough, one by one . . all you women come on here and start crying and boo-hooing about the very thing I tried to warn you about.

Suit yourselves . . beat dead horses . . don't come crying and expect me to have pity, is all I can say because you've all been warned . . repeatedly.

PASSION IS NOT A THOUGHT . . you can't THINK it.

lol, for years I've been laughing at you.

Ok, lack of sleep makes this fish-girl . . mean as a rattlesnake.

Have I ever told anybody in here that my hill has been nick-named, "Rattlesnake Holler"? Can anybody guess why this is?

"Virgo Man (or any man, for that matter) can be changed"

lol, right . . sure . . relating is about changing another to suit your own expectations. Whatever you say . . .

lol, Shaka

"he's a Nightmare of Epic Proportions..."

I'll second that . . actually, believe or not . . I love my Virgo . .

He's just behaves like a Virgo and that irritates the hell out me. Can you tell?

Sometimes, when I hear people talking in here about "manufacturing" their potential partner . . I feel like we're talking about putting a model airplane together.

Really, what's the point in diplomacy? Does anyone ever listen to another, whether one is being diplomatic or not? No . . we fall flat on our faces because life-experiences is the only way to learn.

It's really irrelevant what anybody in here has to say . . it means squat . . so, why bother?

** putting finger on nose and pointing at Shaka

Most people, at first . . disregard my comments because they think I babble and don't really have anything valuable to say . .

Then, after time, they realize that I'm friggin right . . I've lived with this man for 24 goddam years . . I know what the hell I'm talking about.

lol

But, atlas . . love is love and I love him, so here I sit . .

Dyr . . it is the way it is . . don't worry, if a woman loves her man, she'll carry all of this burden for you . . fair? Probably not, but, there are other qualities to which a person can be loved.

My only point was, to say that a person has to feel passion . . don't look for this to happen automatically in the V-man because he has to "think" it, rather than feel it. Perhaps, after time, he can learn to feel it . . but, it's not a natural state.

Scorpio women, perhaps most all women of water . . feel this vibrating down to their very souls and we can love you earth men, to be sure . . but, we can't be basing a relationship with you guys off of you giving us this loving feeling.

This is what this lady is looking for . . she's looking for HIM to desire her the way she desires him . . and it ain't happening without her "manufacturing" this feeling for him.

It is the way it is . . agree, or not is irrevelant to me because I know, I've lived it from this side of the situation. Other's over the years have come in here and confirmed it over, and over, and over again.

So, this isn't one of the V's best qualities . . you could be a Pisces and continually stick your foot in your mouth, lol . . so, it could be worse you know.

You have to take what you got . . that's all we can do.

"The problem is, women take it personally"

I definitely concur that the biggest problems in relationships is women taking things so damn personally . . every little eye movement HAS to mean something personally against us . . it's insane . . from what I see in life, looking at other people, I tend to stand on the ground that women screw up relationships at least 75% of the time because we are so goddammmmm emotionally needy and attempt to force men into explaining every little gesture.

I'm am woman and HAVE to take this fault . . I'm guilty.