So what is it with Virgo women having a bunch of

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TeddyBearMD
@TeddyBearMD
9 Years

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So, there is a woman that has been apart of an organization I run for several years now. She's really nice, and a excellent contribution to the staff. I really have no interest in her romantically, but I notice that she keeps a stable of "male friends" around her all the time. And from what I understand, she has a boyfriend.

In the few conversations I have had with her, it seems like all of her "male friends" are over protective of her and up her ass 24/7. And that pretty much disrupts whatever friendship or anything could have come from our conversations because even though I'm not dating her or anything, I can't deal with the trail of thirsty male followers that revolve around her all the time.

Maybe it's just me, but after some observation, it seems like most Virgo women are like this. They keep a collection of "guy friends" that really want to hookup with them, and let them compete for attention all day. I feel sorry for her boyfriend too, because as a cancer guy, I simply wouldn't be able to deal with so many fuck boys around all the time. I know that virgos are "innocent" and "naive"... but her ass knows better. She's just leading all these dumb ass guys along for the attention. I can't even blame her as much as the dumb ass men that fawn over her daily.

I'm just curious of the psychology behind this and figure some virgo women in here could shed light on this mentality.

๐Ÿ™‚
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Missvirgo
@Missvirgo
12 Years

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For me personally i do have a lot of male friends and yes some do try and step out of that friendzone but they are politely placed back in there , there is zero leading on .

Speaking for myself only i wouldn't stop being friendly towards someone because our feelings differ , i would simply make it clear i am offering friendship and that's it . If you're commuication is clear enough they get it .

My partner would never ever have to worry about things as i am attentive and affectionate to him and him only , i wouldn't ever do anything to make him question my loyalty to him .

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SCORPIOGYRL
@SCORPIOGYRL
11 Years

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Me too. I see nothing wrong with it. My male friends usually have no drama. When I get with my female friends its always something. Even if it's not the perpetuated drama its some drama going on with them. I don't usually discuss my personal business because I don't like to be "that girl". I like to seem well put together so I'm usually the friend who listens but really I'm not emotionally available for that shyt. Male friends... they just want to talk shyt, watch the game, drink, every now and then they have a bit of juicy gossip but usually they are just more supportive and easy going as friends. Male friends make you feel safe and well cared for. They also have the balls to tell you the facts and not just what you want to hear. Just my opinion.
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LadyNeptune
@LadyNeptune
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Posted by P-Angel
All males who are tagging behind females, in where the females are saying the men aren't being led on are indeed being led on and the women are liars.

Of course, the men are being led to believe they have a shot.



As for why women do it? ... because they're insecure, probably due to not getting enough attention from daddy. (if they even had a daddy)
So you don't believe that platonic friendship can exist between a male and female?
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P-Angel
@P-Angel
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Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by P-Angel
All males who are tagging behind females, in where the females are saying the men aren't being led on are indeed being led on and the women are liars.

Of course, the men are being led to believe they have a shot.



As for why women do it? ... because they're insecure, probably due to not getting enough attention from daddy. (if they even had a daddy)
So you don't believe that platonic friendship can exist between a male and female?
click to expand



that's not addressing the topic

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P-Angel
@P-Angel
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Posted by TeddyBearMD

all of her "male friends" are over protective of her and up her ass 24/7. And that pretty much disrupts whatever friendship or anything could have come from our conversations because even though I'm not dating her or anything, I can't deal with the trail of thirsty male followers that revolve around her all the time.






This ^^^^^^^^^^ is what was said, not a platonic friend



I am addressing the topic, not some other idea that formed in my head.

If a man is defending her, and thirsty for her and up her ass 24/7 .. then he is being led on.



period
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Milani
@MilaniKisses
8 YearsVirgo

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Posted by P-Angel
Posted by TeddyBearMD

all of her "male friends" are over protective of her and up her ass 24/7. And that pretty much disrupts whatever friendship or anything could have come from our conversations because even though I'm not dating her or anything, I can't deal with the trail of thirsty male followers that revolve around her all the time.






This ^^^^^^^^^^ is what was said, not a platonic friend



I am addressing the topic, not some other idea that formed in my head.

If a man is defending her, and thirsty for her and up her ass 24/7 .. then he is being led on.



period

click to expand

Understanding your original response more after this explanation. :-)
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LadyNeptune
@LadyNeptune
10 Years25,000+ Posts

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Posted by P-Angel
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by P-Angel
All males who are tagging behind females, in where the females are saying the men aren't being led on are indeed being led on and the women are liars.

Of course, the men are being led to believe they have a shot.



As for why women do it? ... because they're insecure, probably due to not getting enough attention from daddy. (if they even had a daddy)
So you don't believe that platonic friendship can exist between a male and female?


that's not addressing the topic

click to expand

Establishing whether its possible would clarify the topic question, no?

Op claims he's not interested romantically in the virgal, however it seems the opposite to me.
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LadyNeptune
@LadyNeptune
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Posted by P-Angel
Posted by TeddyBearMD

all of her "male friends" are over protective of her and up her ass 24/7. And that pretty much disrupts whatever friendship or anything could have come from our conversations because even though I'm not dating her or anything, I can't deal with the trail of thirsty male followers that revolve around her all the time.






This ^^^^^^^^^^ is what was said, not a platonic friend



I am addressing the topic, not some other idea that formed in my head.

If a man is defending her, and thirsty for her and up her ass 24/7 .. then he is being led on.



period

click to expand

So what does that say about the op...that he is eager also to be her friend. Does this make him another thirst monster ready to fall in line at her heels??
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P-Angel
@P-Angel
20 Years25,000+ PostsPisces

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Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by P-Angel
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by P-Angel
All males who are tagging behind females, in where the females are saying the men aren't being led on are indeed being led on and the women are liars.

Of course, the men are being led to believe they have a shot.



As for why women do it? ... because they're insecure, probably due to not getting enough attention from daddy. (if they even had a daddy)
So you don't believe that platonic friendship can exist between a male and female?


that's not addressing the topic


Establishing whether its possible would clarify the topic question, no?

Op claims he's not interested romantically in the virgal, however it seems the opposite to me.
click to expand



I'm not interested in his motive. Maybe another time I might come back to analyze it.

I'm just responding to the topic as it was presented.
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TeddyBearMD
@TeddyBearMD
9 Years

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Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by TeddyBearMD
I really have no interest in her romantically

even though I'm not dating her or anything, I can't deal with the trail of thirsty male followers that revolve around her all the time.
For someone who isn't romantically interested, your really fixated on who she surrounds herself with. I see you.
click to expand

It's called an observation.
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LadyNeptune
@LadyNeptune
10 Years25,000+ Posts

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Posted by TeddyBearMD
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by TeddyBearMD
I really have no interest in her romantically

even though I'm not dating her or anything, I can't deal with the trail of thirsty male followers that revolve around her all the time.
For someone who isn't romantically interested, your really fixated on who she surrounds herself with. I see you.
It's called an observation.
click to expand

An observation you felt urged to share with the whole of DXP. An observation you are asking for others opinions to understand.
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Virgorean
@Virgorean
9 Years1,000+ Posts

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There is drama just the same within a male group as in with a female group. The difference is how it's exposed. I make friends easily with males because I would rather talk about football, current events, or nerdy stuff. Things that most of my female friends don't care for or know about. They like to gossip or talk about the latest fashion and I don't have much to say on the topics, which is probably why I come off as detached a lot of the times.

I don't pretend to deny that my male friends have liked me. A few have admitted to it, but I make it clear that it is only friendship I value and if they cross that line then I'll distance myself. Although, when I'm in a relationship I impose boundaries and I will introduce my guy to them so they both have a better understanding of each other. The ones who are truly the female's friends will respect that.

I have 8 male friends who I have been friends with for at the least 5+ years. Except for one who is an ex, I have never been intimate with any of them. I've met some of their SOs. Some are intimidated by me, but that's where it is my duty, as the friend, to make her feel comfortable by respecting their boundaries. When a male introduces his female friend to his SO then it shows he values the female's friendship.
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Anonima
@Anonima
9 Years

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Im also a Virgo woman and my friends all are guys except for 2 girlsfriend who i really trust. These guys have all tried to get with me but i just told them it is only a friendship and they seem to understand it. I even once spend the night with one of my closest male friend, we slept in the same bed and he never tried to touch or kiss me. I think it has something to do with self esteem and ego. Not so sure because like i said im also a virgo woman
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INTJ emotionally conflicted virgo
@coldwateryvirgo
8 Years500+ PostsVirgo

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If a girl don't have or can't maintain friendship with a female at all and claim they all don't like her , that is worrisome .

I have a lot of guy friend because initially it's easier to talk to them . I'm blunt and communicate a lot like a guy. If I'm being a little judgemental a guy usually think Its just a strong opinion and a girl would read it as I think I'm better than them .

In high school these were men who were genuinely friend, even if they liked me we all still hung out as friends.

As I got older though, if a guy is single and you have a good personality plus you are slightly above average . The borderline for friendship get blurry especially if you're both not seeing anyone .

Because of that, most guys end up wanting something more eventually which is why i don't hang out with guy as much unless we're all in a big group of mutual friend. The one that maintain my close guy friend are the one who can respect bondary and not attempt to cross. I hate having to repeat myself especially when i clearly stated I don't want more

Growing up I had a hard time being friends with girl , not because they didn't like me but I was just quiet, shy and was a wallflower .

I always have a close female friend here and there throughout my life. We usually meet by chance and connect almost instantly . This is rare but when I do have one, it's a really close and deep relationship .

I connect best with older male and female though. I don't do well carefree, sit around and do nothing all day activities . That's usually what friends do . I'm more let's grab lunch and catch up every once in while friendship . A lot of female friendship needs more than that . They need update, gossip , sharing every detail, shopping together . I can do all that , just not too often .
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INTJ emotionally conflicted virgo
@coldwateryvirgo
8 Years500+ PostsVirgo

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I mean most of us our crazy to think if given a chance and the guy was single they wouldn't fuck us if the light was green.

I had and ex who pointed this out in his attempt to say I should hang out with a guy friend too much. He , a Taurus said "The guys are your friend , so to a degree they already like you . You know your pretty , if it wasn't for the fact that they did want to risk losing the friendship or you didn't tell them no , they would have sex with you . Trust me , they are your friend but they still look at you sexually even if you don't "

So far , in my experience , this has proven to be true . So I don't think it's far fetch to say that if a guy is attracted to you , even if you're their friend , they think if you sexually .

I will never tell my ex that for once, he actually made sense
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INTJ emotionally conflicted virgo
@coldwateryvirgo
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Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
i stopped having male friends when they dropped me as soon as they got into a serious relationship, than i knew they weren't really my friends but waiting in the shadows for my love.

fuk them to hell, i wasted lots of energy and emotion on my friends.

fuk them to hell


Yes ,this . More often then not , they stick around waiting for us to finally have feelings for them. It's more like , we re friends until I come to term that it's never happening
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TeddyBearMD
@TeddyBearMD
9 Years

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See, here is the thing about these male-to-female "friendships". As most of you with "male friends" have already stated, the guys are only your "friend" because you put him back in the friend zone AFTER he tried to take it further.

This means that he is basically waiting for the day that you decide to "want more" or the day where you come crying to him about your relationship problems so he can take advantage of your vulnerability. So basically, because you friend zoned these guys who wanted more, they are basically on stand-by. They are backup dick for the female as soon as there is any trouble in her current relationship or there is a crack in that foundation, a guy is going to come seeping through it.

Now, as a man, what kinda pussified cuck is seriously going to put up with that shit? What kind of man is going to take her seriously if she has all these "guy friends" around her all the time. Imagine being with your girl and knowing that as soon as you guys have your first fight, she is going to go running to one of her "guy friends" to complain and tell him all about it. You know how many times i've seen this happen? with the end result being, the girl fucks her "male friend" for "comfort"...... TOO FUCKING MANY.

Now there are some exceptions to this. They guy friend could be gay as fuck, could be her bother, cousin, he could be the next door neighbor that she saw everyday and got sick of seeing, so she doesn't desire him. But outside of those SUPER RARE circumstances, don't trust it. That's all i'm saying. I know some of you disagree, but it's only because you're not being completely honest about the situation.
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Sunsetvirgo
@Sunsetvirgo
9 Years5,000+ Posts

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Posted by TeddyBearMD
See, here is the thing about these male-to-female "friendships". As most of you with "male friends" have already stated, the guys are only your "friend" because you put him back in the friend zone AFTER he tried to take it further.

This means that he is basically waiting for the day that you decide to "want more" or the day where you come crying to him about your relationship problems so he can take advantage of your vulnerability. So basically, because you friend zoned these guys who wanted more, they are basically on stand-by. They are backup dick for the female as soon as there is any trouble in her current relationship or there is a crack in that foundation, a guy is going to come seeping through it.

Now, as a man, what kinda pussified cuck is seriously going to put up with that shit? What kind of man is going to take her seriously if she has all these "guy friends" around her all the time. Imagine being with your girl and knowing that as soon as you guys have your first fight, she is going to go running to one of her "guy friends" to complain and tell him all about it. You know how many times i've seen this happen? with the end result being, the girl fucks her "male friend" for "comfort"...... TOO FUCKING MANY.

Now there are some exceptions to this. They guy friend could be gay as fuck, could be her bother, cousin, he could be the next door neighbor that she saw everyday and got sick of seeing, so she doesn't desire him. But outside of those SUPER RARE circumstances, don't trust it. That's all i'm saying. I know some of you disagree, but it's only because you're not being completely honest about the situation.
The thing is, after I've "put them back in the friend zone" as you called it, I did just that. Because I respect them and I respect the relationship I'm in (if I'm in one at the time). What the guy wants to make out of that is his problem, but I know where I stand. I value the friendship the guy gives, nothing else. And honestly, being a Virgo, I'm very picky as well. So if the guy friend isn't my boyfriend before I DO get a boyfriend, there is a very small chance he'll be my boyfriend afterward.

I also don't "run to the guy friend" after a breakup. I don't really talk to guys about that, unless he asks. That's more of girl talk.

Like many of the Virgals have said, guys are great to speak with intellectually. To have convos with that we wouldn't be able to have with the average girl.

Now I WILL say that I have fallen for a best guy friend before, and I'll be honest and say that that's usually how many of my relationships start. BUT that's not to say I'm "trying out" all of these guys at once and keeping them in this little box until I'm ready to choose.

This is usually how the process goes:

I make guy friends (usually from good convos). We're all good, platonic. I tell them I'm not in a relationship, nor am I looking for one with them IF they ask about it or hint for something more. Everything is settled on my part, whether it is internally settled on his part, I don't know. I make more guy friends, one in particular doesn't bring up relationships, convo moves smoothly, not pushy, there's just this SPARK on MY END. Will I tell him about it? Maybe, maybe not. It depends on whether I want to endanger the relationship or not, and how deep my feelings have become.

Hmmm I feel like I've confused this for you . Oh well ?
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Sunsetvirgo
@Sunsetvirgo
9 Years5,000+ Posts

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Posted by TeddyBearMD
See, here is the thing about these male-to-female "friendships". As most of you with "male friends" have already stated, the guys are only your "friend" because you put him back in the friend zone AFTER he tried to take it further.

This means that he is basically waiting for the day that you decide to "want more" or the day where you come crying to him about your relationship problems so he can take advantage of your vulnerability. So basically, because you friend zoned these guys who wanted more, they are basically on stand-by. They are backup dick for the female as soon as there is any trouble in her current relationship or there is a crack in that foundation, a guy is going to come seeping through it.

Now, as a man, what kinda pussified cuck is seriously going to put up with that shit? What kind of man is going to take her seriously if she has all these "guy friends" around her all the time. Imagine being with your girl and knowing that as soon as you guys have your first fight, she is going to go running to one of her "guy friends" to complain and tell him all about it. You know how many times i've seen this happen? with the end result being, the girl fucks her "male friend" for "comfort"...... TOO FUCKING MANY.

Now there are some exceptions to this. They guy friend could be gay as fuck, could be her bother, cousin, he could be the next door neighbor that she saw everyday and got sick of seeing, so she doesn't desire him. But outside of those SUPER RARE circumstances, don't trust it. That's all i'm saying. I know some of you disagree, but it's only because you're not being completely honest about the situation.
"That means he is basically waiting on the day that you want more"

LMFAOOO I hope he isn't, because I would have already discussed with him how platonic I see our friendship. If he honestly wants to "wait" he can, idk what for though ? Considering I've already made it clear that I only see him as a friend.

The Virgo makes it pretty clear where she stands and can honestly only hope that he understands and chooses to realize where he stands with her at that point.



LMFAOOOO . "What type of pussified cuck... is going to take her seriously..."

Well be glad that you don't have to I suppose ??โ€โ™€๏ธ

I can't stand when a boyfriend tries to control who I talk to. If you control me I will lash out. Also, don't get this idea that every Virgal has like a lobby of men that are pouring their hearts out with flowers and chocolates and plotting her boyfriends demise. Like it's literally JUST a few guy friends, mixed in with girls. Guys aren't the only people Virgals have as friends. Do people see our sign with more than average amount of guy friends? Maybe. But is that All we have? No
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Virgorean
@Virgorean
9 Years1,000+ Posts

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Posted by TeddyBearMD
See, here is the thing about these male-to-female "friendships".ย  As most of you with "male friends" have already stated, the guys are only your "friend" because you put him back in the friend zone AFTER he tried to take it further.

This means that he is basically waiting for the day that you decide to "want more" or the day where you come crying to him about your relationship problems so he can take advantage of your vulnerability. So basically, because you friend zoned these guys who wanted more, they are basically on stand-by. They are backup dick for the female as soon as there is any trouble in her current relationship or there is a crack in that foundation, a guy is going to come seeping through it.

Valid point if it's a fresh friendship, the attraction remains. However, for long term friendships the attraction fades and by then they've been upgraded to the family zone-acceptance. Not only that, but you're talking about a 5+ years wait to have a shot at it.ย  Are you willing to wait that long for a one nighter?

Because that is some dedication right there.


Now, as a man, what kinda pussified cuck is seriously going to put up with that shit? What kind of man is going to take her seriously if she has all these "guy friends" around her all the time. Imagine being with your girl and knowing that as soon as you guys have your first fight, she is going to go running to one of her "guy friends" to complain and tell him all about it. You know how many times i've seen this happen? with the end result being, the girl fucks her "male friend" for "comfort"......ย  TOO FUCKING MANY.

No dude. That's what female friends are for. And this goes back to putting the whole boundary system in check. Relationship issues should be discussed amongst the two individuals involved. To bring anyone else into it, regardless of gender, will invite in more issues. It's you and your partner's opinions that are relevant not theirs.

Now there are some exceptions to this. They guy friend could be gay as fuck, could be her bother, cousin, he could be the next door neighbor that she saw everyday and got sick of seeing, so she doesn't desire him. But outside of those SUPER RARE circumstances, don't trust it. That's all i'm saying. I know some of you disagree, but it's only because you're not being completely honest about the situation.

Or you're justifying it by twisting it to your view because you may have some underlying trust issues with women.

ย