Virgo Heartbreak Warfare

If a Virgo man knows that you are the one, has said that you are the one, wants to be with you, loves you more than any woman ever, but doesn't know how to keep you because of contributing outside factors (ie:a meddling overbearing family member)...what will happen? Are Virgo's strong enough to walk away from the love of their life? This is out of my control now, so I'm wondering if he has what it takes to turn this around....

Thoughts?

Will you be okay with it if he chose you over his family? Cause I think in the long run, if they disown him, he'll sort of resent you down the line. Imagine you having a great relationship with your own family, going to family gatherings & stuff..what about him? Blood is thicker than water in some cases & you surely don't want your man to have no relationship with his blood.

I'm going through something similar with a libra & rather he lose me than lose his flesh n blood cause I know how important family is (I don't like any of my remaining family members)..but I would'nt want somebody else to have ruined family ties because of me. Time & destiny will tell..not gonna wedge myself between a person & their family.

You're absolutely right... and I have certainly thought about that... it's a tough one. Ideally of course I don't want to come between him and anyone...especially family, but in our case there is one family member in particular who is the common denominator in several family issues outside of this one, he's miserable and he's taking everyone down with him...he's decided he doesn't I am no good for his Brother, and subsequently driven a wedge between us. The thing is, this is all so outlandish that I'm not even upset... what am I going to do, right? That's how I look at it. My only hope is that my bf can suffer enough loss here to finally stand up to his Brother and call him out for judging me completely wrong. *I'm just shaking my head.

I really don't know what to say to you, just dont push him to choose. Let it be his decision & his alone, so that when you all's relationship dont work out, atleast you'll be guilt free & he'll have a support system in his brother or any other member of his family. Trust & believe in your love and God & who knows, in the long run his family might learn to accept his relationship with you..welcome you. I honestly believe that one's future with a s/o should be built on clear grounds with family blessings & whatnot. But that's just my belief. Do what you see fit & good luck.

PS- if you really do belong together, nothing will ever stand in your way of togetherness..not even a disgruntled family member. This might be a "test" to your love if you believe in that sort of thing lol. I wish you all the best 🙂

If you watch the Movie the Curious Case of Benjamin Button. And then ask yourself is your love a love for the ages. Can you endure through pitfalls and worldly obstacles?

Then you will know what to do.

Posted by BalmyTigress
I may be totally out of line suggesting this, but what if you speak to his brother? Not in an angry way, but approaching him and asking what's bothering him. When someone is being difficult, they're expecting everyone to turn against them. What if you don't? What if you listen to him genuinely and let him get some of that anger off his chest. He might be so pleasantly surprised by it that you'll be his new favorite. The grumpy ones secretly want someone to understand them and listen to them.

While I do like your thinking here... I could never ever ever rock that boat, or tip that apple cart.. he wasn't even approachable when he 'liked me.' But you're totally right 'Th grumpy ones' are that way! I suppose I just don't have the stones to do that lol... plus In my opinion, it's not my place.. if this guy loves me as much as he swears up and down that he does, shouldn't he have the balls?

Posted by WaterCup
I really don't know what to say to you, just dont push him to choose. Let it be his decision & his alone, so that when you all's relationship dont work out, atleast you'll be guilt free & he'll have a support system in his brother or any other member of his family. Trust & believe in your love and God & who knows, in the long run his family might learn to accept his relationship with you..welcome you. I honestly believe that one's future with a s/o should be built on clear grounds with family blessings & whatnot. But that's just my belief. Do what you see fit & good luck.

PS- if you really do belong together, nothing will ever stand in your way of togetherness..not even a disgruntled family member. This might be a "test" to your love if you believe in that sort of thing lol. I wish you all the best 🙂

I am guilt free... Im stepping aside for him to sort this out... (or not) It's just so tragic and somewhat shakesperean to me... lol... but I'm not going to ball my eyes out over this.. I'm crushed, no doubt about it... but I'm 33 years old, and so is he... this is high school shite.

Posted by WaterCup
I really don't know what to say to you, just dont push him to choose. Let it be his decision & his alone, so that when you all's relationship dont work out, atleast you'll be guilt free & he'll have a support system in his brother or any other member of his family. Trust & believe in your love and God & who knows, in the long run his family might learn to accept his relationship with you..welcome you. I honestly believe that one's future with a s/o should be built on clear grounds with family blessings & whatnot. But that's just my belief. Do what you see fit & good luck.

PS- if you really do belong together, nothing will ever stand in your way of togetherness..not even a disgruntled family member. This might be a "test" to your love if you believe in that sort of thing lol. I wish you all the best 🙂

I am guilt free... Im stepping aside for him to sort this out... (or not) It's just so tragic and somewhat shakesperean to me... lol... but I'm not going to ball my eyes out over this.. I'm crushed, no doubt about it... but I'm 33 years old, and so is he... this is high school shite.

Posted by NGG22

Posted by WaterCup
I really don't know what to say to you, just dont push him to choose. Let it be his decision & his alone, so that when you all's relationship dont work out, atleast you'll be guilt free & he'll have a support system in his brother or any other member of his family. Trust & believe in your love and God & who knows, in the long run his family might learn to accept his relationship with you..welcome you. I honestly believe that one's future with a s/o should be built on clear grounds with family blessings & whatnot. But that's just my belief. Do what you see fit & good luck.

PS- if you really do belong together, nothing will ever stand in your way of togetherness..not even a disgruntled family member. This might be a "test" to your love if you believe in that sort of thing lol. I wish you all the best 🙂

I am guilt free... Im stepping aside for him to sort this out... (or not) It's just so tragic and somewhat shakesperean to me... lol... but I'm not going to ball my eyes out over this.. I'm crushed, no doubt about it... but I'm 33 years old, and so is he... this is high school shite.

click to expand

lmao @ Shakesperean. Who said life was going to be fair lol? How long have you guys been together & why doesn't the brother like you?

We have been together for just about a year... I'm not sure what happened exactly... like I said, he leads a miserable life, and doesn't like a lot of people...so he projects his shite onto others.

It's a sad state of affairs.

I got a message from him last night, telling me how he's so broken over this...devastated...lost...
Why send that? Ending it was his call... So confusing.

Posted by CluelessCancer
Too many weak inept men in the world i tell ya.

AMEN! Grow a pair. 🙂

If he has a miserable life right now maybe your hurting him more than you are helping him and he wants to get healthy or cut the 'shite,' as you put it out of him life.

Sometimes life is now not about punching something out but wading through.

Posted by NGG22
We have been together for just about a year... I'm not sure what happened exactly... like I said, he leads a miserable life, and doesn't like a lot of people...so he projects his shite onto others.

It's a sad state of affairs.

I got a message from him last night, telling me how he's so broken over this...devastated...lost...
Why send that? Ending it was his call... So confusing.

I hope you get answers to clear your confusion..I dont know what else to say. It's weird that he lets his brother come between you two, I'd understand if it was a parent or something. Oh well. Does he have parents? Is he from a culture that is big on family, especially elders?

I'm a little late to this topic, and I read that it was ended. But, let me tell you about my situation:

I absolutely hate, despise, detest, loathe, and any other word that describes those feelings my mother in law. She is pure, and evil trash, and if I had met her before my wife and I got married, I likely would have run like hell.

But, I met the bitch after I was married, so I simply pulled a disappearing act on her. I haven't seen or spoken to that bitch in a year and a half. Thanksgiving and Christmas, I stay home and watch football and drink beer while the wife and daughter go to her house for dinner.

For the first few months, she had no idea I felt this way, until I ran into one of her friends. She asked me 'Hey, aren't you ____'s son in law?' First word out of my mouth: 'Unfortunately!' lol

She has repeatedly asked my wife when I will let it go, but I will not. She ruined my life, and I will never forgive her for it. Last year, my mom died. My dad died in 2006. The bitch told my wife that I will have to come around now because now, she is the closest thing I have to a parent. I laughed my ass off. I still have my stepfather, and even if I didn't, there would be no way I would ever go to her.

Very interesting yet unfortunate ciscumstances... I'm curious if your wife resents you for not trying to make peace with her Mom, or rather if she understands your position on this... the reason I ask is because my biggest fear is having my Virgo resent me, when it's his Brother that is causing all this turmoil.

If she does, she hasn't said anything. I did try to make peace multiple times, and it would seem to work. But, then she would just go back to being herself. I gave up, and wrote her off. She doesn't exist to me. I told my wife that when we are able to leave this town, I will never come back, and if she wants to see her grand daughter, she will have to do it on her own dime and stay at a hotel...or I'll stay at the hotel. We moved here because she missed her grand daughter, and guilted my wife into it. I knew moving here was a bad idea, but I went along with it anyway. Now, we are stuck, and I can't find a good job. When we got here, we had to stay with her until we got on our feet, and the MIL went out of her way to make sure everyone there was miserable. When she dies, I will not go to the funeral. I'll be at a bar celebrating.

Sorry about my rant, but all you can do is talk to your guy about his brother. He will either listen or he won't.

jesus Merlot ...... how fucking rigid and unforgiving can you be?

You're so self-absorbed that it's likely that you are the one who sits alone, while everyone else is out partying.

and how fucked up you are to not do family at Thanksgiving and Christmas .... it's just all about you, and nobody else appears to matter to you .. not even your child who would actually probably like to have daddy present in life

As for NGG ... who the fuck do you think you are putting your man in a position to choose?

Put on your big girl panties, and get along for the sake of your man, instead of having him being pitted against two people he loves.

:::: shakes head ::::

Posted by P-Angel
jesus Merlot ...... how fucking rigid and unforgiving can you be?

You're so self-absorbed that it's likely that you are the one who sits alone, while everyone else is out partying.

and how fucked up you are to not do family at Thanksgiving and Christmas .... it's just all about you, and nobody else appears to matter to you .. not even your child who would actually probably like to have daddy present in life

I still have Thanksgiving and Christmas with my family, but earlier in the day. And, my daughter is a total Daddy's girl, thank you very much. I am not telling the bitch that she can't see her granddaughter. And, last year on Thanksgiving, my wife and daughter were gone for about 3 hours total. Why? Her mother flipped out once again, and they left.

Don't be so judgmental. I have a reason for everything I do. 🙂