My bull asked me to marry him (Page 2)

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by CancaGal

Posted by SlipperySlope

You gonna say no based on the circumstances in which he asked you?

I won’t say no if he ask me again when he’s happy. I mean in a better situation.

Wtf kinda crazy shit is this?

You want to marry him? Say yes.

You don't want to marry him? Say no.

Fuck off with the games.

click to expand

I’d like to think that if I say yes to him, I’ll try my best to make it last.

There’s no game. I want a happy smile on his face when he asks me, not the tears. How many times can you be proposed to? I want a smile, is it too much to ask?

Posted by CancaGal

Posted by jeane

Posted by CancaGal

Posted by jeane

Posted by CancaGal

He said that after we had a big argument about his ex. His ex was so annoying and I told him to cut her off. He did it, but poorly worded. He said something like “not ready to be friend” and “for a while” to her, and I was not happy with it. I wanted to break up with him, I thought that he was waiting my time. He cried and said that he would marry me so that I can’t leave him. He did call my parents to ask for the permission to marry me and took me to the jewelry shop to have a look at the engagement ring.

I’m confused. I do want to marry him, but I think I deserve better. I deserve to be asked when he’s happy, not when he messes shit up. Have told him that I want him to marry me because he truly loves me but not for keeping me around. He said he thought they are the same thing.

Guess my EQ is higher than him. Need some insight from you bulls

omg! congratulations! that is brilliant news.

you've known him for 8 months.

you're telling him who he can and cannot speak to

he proposed when he felt under pressure and in a state of fear

you think that you are smarter and more mature than him

you think that he is not good enough for you

mazel tov! it's going to be great.

I’ve known him more than 1 year. I know, it’s not long enough. I’m not telling him who he can/ cannot speak to. But I won’t let him speak to someone who says things like “tomorrow is our Valentines”. I’m not saying I’m smarter than him, I’m saying that I’m more sensitive than him. And I don’t think that he is not good enough for me, otherwise I’d have dumped him. Don’t be overthinking about my words.

not a whole year?! you've known him for that long? amazing.

" I’m not telling him who he can/ cannot speak to. But I won’t let him speak to someone who says things like “tomorrow is our Valentines”."

read that sentence again.

you said that you deserve better. you said he is not considerate. you said he is immature and he needs to act like an adult.

really, listen to the way you speak about him. you do think you are better than him.

these thoughts would never even enter my mind when talking about my partner, let alone type them out without shame.

don't blame me for what you see when a mirror is held up.

" I’m not telling him who he can/ cannot speak to. But I won’t let him speak to someone who says things like “tomorrow is our Valentines”."

-> I’m a Cancer. I don’t like threats. And friends don’t say things like what she says. And I don’t need to explain what happened between them for you to understand the reason why she needs to get lost. And she’s not his only female friends.

-> I deserve better, as being a girl being asked by her lover to marry him, I deserve to be asked in a better situation. I deserve to be asked with a smile, not tears. You may okay with tears, but I know that if he did it out of fear, it wouldn’t last.

-> And yes, he is not considerate. What’s wrong with me telling the truth here? He worn the undies she bought him, kept the “Pretty Girl” in his phone (I had a post about this couple months ago), and even he admitted it. He was immature when he didn’t want to talk to his ex because she hurt him so bad, but instead of talking it out, he’d ignored her for a quite long time. I don’t like her, true. But I don’t like it when my bf treating people like that. Balls up and tell her that he doesn’t want to be friends anymore and stop wasting her time and efforts.

-> “immature” and “act like adult” is what he used when he talked to his ex. My demand was “keep things black and white. You want to be friends again, go tell her that she hurt you and you need her apology. You don’t wanna be friends, go explain the reason to her and cut her off.”

-> We are different. You’re fine with something doesn’t mean that I’m fine with it too. His friendship be him and his ex was over for a long time, before we got together. In my mind, if it’s over, let it go. He ignoring to me is like he’s keeping her there.

click to expand

you're a right little madam aren't you?

but you've convinced me. none of that seems controlling in the slightest.

Alright. I’m sorry for not addressing the situation very clear. I love my boyfriend, he’s a wonderful guy. And the thing between him and his ex was the only issue that we had. It’s solved. We are healing after everything we’ve said to each other.

The question I have here is that he asked me the question (I did say yes tho it was not a proper proposal). He said it’s because “I never want to lose you”. I said “That’s not how you keep me around. Marriage is much more than that. I’m staying with you, but please ask the question if that’s what you really want, and you do it out of love”. Then he said “Aren’t they the same thing?”

Ok, is asking someone to marry you because you’re scared of losing them equal asking someone to marry you because you love them and want to make that life time commitment? They’re 2 different things in my mind, and I’d love to know what bulls think about it from your perspective.

Posted by Skeleton

Posted by CancaGal

Posted by jeane

Posted by CancaGal

Posted by jeane

Posted by CancaGal

He said that after we had a big argument about his ex. His ex was so annoying and I told him to cut her off. He did it, but poorly worded. He said something like “not ready to be friend” and “for a while” to her, and I was not happy with it. I wanted to break up with him, I thought that he was waiting my time. He cried and said that he would marry me so that I can’t leave him. He did call my parents to ask for the permission to marry me and took me to the jewelry shop to have a look at the engagement ring.

I’m confused. I do want to marry him, but I think I deserve better. I deserve to be asked when he’s happy, not when he messes shit up. Have told him that I want him to marry me because he truly loves me but not for keeping me around. He said he thought they are the same thing.

Guess my EQ is higher than him. Need some insight from you bulls

omg! congratulations! that is brilliant news.

you've known him for 8 months.

you're telling him who he can and cannot speak to

he proposed when he felt under pressure and in a state of fear

you think that you are smarter and more mature than him

you think that he is not good enough for you

mazel tov! it's going to be great.

I’ve known him more than 1 year. I know, it’s not long enough. I’m not telling him who he can/ cannot speak to. But I won’t let him speak to someone who says things like “tomorrow is our Valentines”. I’m not saying I’m smarter than him, I’m saying that I’m more sensitive than him. And I don’t think that he is not good enough for me, otherwise I’d have dumped him. Don’t be overthinking about my words.

not a whole year?! you've known him for that long? amazing.

" I’m not telling him who he can/ cannot speak to. But I won’t let him speak to someone who says things like “tomorrow is our Valentines”."

read that sentence again.

you said that you deserve better. you said he is not considerate. you said he is immature and he needs to act like an adult.

really, listen to the way you speak about him. you do think you are better than him.

these thoughts would never even enter my mind when talking about my partner, let alone type them out without shame.

don't blame me for what you see when a mirror is held up.

" I’m not telling him who he can/ cannot speak to. But I won’t let him speak to someone who says things like “tomorrow is our Valentines”."

-> I’m a Cancer. I don’t like threats. And friends don’t say things like what she says. And I don’t need to explain what happened between them for you to understand the reason why she needs to get lost. And she’s not his only female friends.

-> I deserve better, as being a girl being asked by her lover to marry him, I deserve to be asked in a better situation. I deserve to be asked with a smile, not tears. You may okay with tears, but I know that if he did it out of fear, it wouldn’t last.

-> And yes, he is not considerate. What’s wrong with me telling the truth here? He worn the undies she bought him, kept the “Pretty Girl” in his phone (I had a post about this couple months ago), and even he admitted it. He was immature when he didn’t want to talk to his ex because she hurt him so bad, but instead of talking it out, he’d ignored her for a quite long time. I don’t like her, true. But I don’t like it when my bf treating people like that. Balls up and tell her that he doesn’t want to be friends anymore and stop wasting her time and efforts.

-> “immature” and “act like adult” is what he used when he talked to his ex. My demand was “keep things black and white. You want to be friends again, go tell her that she hurt you and you need her apology. You don’t wanna be friends, go explain the reason to her and cut her off.”

-> We are different. You’re fine with something doesn’t mean that I’m fine with it too. His friendship be him and his ex was over for a long time, before we got together. In my mind, if it’s over, let it go. He ignoring to me is like he’s keeping her there.

You know, you can go fuck yourself with that "immature" assumptions towards your bf of ignoring her while he need to have a damn space to heal or distraction to be able to move on.

People are to damn different of how to handle the break ups and healing afterwards.

It takes a fucking time to heal of this and sometimes cutting things off forever is the best thing while his ex needs to take a fucking hint and move the fuck on. And for Bull it'll take a fucking while to heal. I don't support a person while in relationship of not able to move on situation as well and hung of that recent ex. Hence waiting till that person is moved on.

But insulting him like you're better than him with that high eq of yours and even insulting of his crying? Grow the fuck up already. That's not high eq you're talking off, but self-entitled manipulative bitch.

I hope he realised about you and get the fuck out of your sight!

click to expand

you know, if my partner proposed to me through tears do you know what my reaction would be? fuck, please don't be upset. let's talk about it and make it right. it would give me physical pain to see him like that. i wouldn't be saying that i deserve better because i wanted to be proposed to under better conditions. that response is the height of selfishness.

screw the proposal. if my guy is upset then i am upset alongside him. instead she is talking about going ring shopping. what.the.actual.fuck.

she's missed the point entirely.

Posted by CancaGal

Alright. I’m sorry for not addressing the situation very clear. I love my boyfriend, he’s a wonderful guy. And the thing between him and his ex was the only issue that we had. It’s solved. We are healing after everything we’ve said to each other.

The question I have here is that he asked me the question (I did say yes tho it was not a proper proposal). He said it’s because “I never want to lose you”. I said “That’s not how you keep me around. Marriage is much more than that. I’m staying with you, but please ask the question if that’s what you really want, and you do it out of love”. Then he said “Aren’t they the same thing?”

Ok, is asking someone to marry you because you’re scared of losing them equal asking someone to marry you because you love them and want to make that life time commitment? They’re 2 different things in my mind, and I’d love to know what bulls think about it from your perspective.

perhaps he's just not that romantically inclined or good with words but IMO they're the same sentiment....he doesn't want to lose you because he loves you....

if I always want be around someone, can't imagine life without them, they make me feel comfortable, relaxed, etc. - that's a deep form of love for me....yes I also feel the same way about my couch, and although I can't think of any disanalogies between the two at the moment, I feel like I could with enough time....

Posted by Skeleton

Posted by CancaGal

Posted by jeane

Posted by CancaGal

Posted by jeane

Posted by CancaGal

He said that after we had a big argument about his ex. His ex was so annoying and I told him to cut her off. He did it, but poorly worded. He said something like “not ready to be friend” and “for a while” to her, and I was not happy with it. I wanted to break up with him, I thought that he was waiting my time. He cried and said that he would marry me so that I can’t leave him. He did call my parents to ask for the permission to marry me and took me to the jewelry shop to have a look at the engagement ring.

I’m confused. I do want to marry him, but I think I deserve better. I deserve to be asked when he’s happy, not when he messes shit up. Have told him that I want him to marry me because he truly loves me but not for keeping me around. He said he thought they are the same thing.

Guess my EQ is higher than him. Need some insight from you bulls

omg! congratulations! that is brilliant news.

you've known him for 8 months.

you're telling him who he can and cannot speak to

he proposed when he felt under pressure and in a state of fear

you think that you are smarter and more mature than him

you think that he is not good enough for you

mazel tov! it's going to be great.

I’ve known him more than 1 year. I know, it’s not long enough. I’m not telling him who he can/ cannot speak to. But I won’t let him speak to someone who says things like “tomorrow is our Valentines”. I’m not saying I’m smarter than him, I’m saying that I’m more sensitive than him. And I don’t think that he is not good enough for me, otherwise I’d have dumped him. Don’t be overthinking about my words.

not a whole year?! you've known him for that long? amazing.

" I’m not telling him who he can/ cannot speak to. But I won’t let him speak to someone who says things like “tomorrow is our Valentines”."

read that sentence again.

you said that you deserve better. you said he is not considerate. you said he is immature and he needs to act like an adult.

really, listen to the way you speak about him. you do think you are better than him.

these thoughts would never even enter my mind when talking about my partner, let alone type them out without shame.

don't blame me for what you see when a mirror is held up.

" I’m not telling him who he can/ cannot speak to. But I won’t let him speak to someone who says things like “tomorrow is our Valentines”."

-> I’m a Cancer. I don’t like threats. And friends don’t say things like what she says. And I don’t need to explain what happened between them for you to understand the reason why she needs to get lost. And she’s not his only female friends.

-> I deserve better, as being a girl being asked by her lover to marry him, I deserve to be asked in a better situation. I deserve to be asked with a smile, not tears. You may okay with tears, but I know that if he did it out of fear, it wouldn’t last.

-> And yes, he is not considerate. What’s wrong with me telling the truth here? He worn the undies she bought him, kept the “Pretty Girl” in his phone (I had a post about this couple months ago), and even he admitted it. He was immature when he didn’t want to talk to his ex because she hurt him so bad, but instead of talking it out, he’d ignored her for a quite long time. I don’t like her, true. But I don’t like it when my bf treating people like that. Balls up and tell her that he doesn’t want to be friends anymore and stop wasting her time and efforts.

-> “immature” and “act like adult” is what he used when he talked to his ex. My demand was “keep things black and white. You want to be friends again, go tell her that she hurt you and you need her apology. You don’t wanna be friends, go explain the reason to her and cut her off.”

-> We are different. You’re fine with something doesn’t mean that I’m fine with it too. His friendship be him and his ex was over for a long time, before we got together. In my mind, if it’s over, let it go. He ignoring to me is like he’s keeping her there.

You know, you can go fuck yourself with that "immature" assumptions towards your bf of ignoring her while he need to have a damn space to heal or distraction to be able to move on.

People are to damn different of how to handle the break ups and healing afterwards.

It takes a fucking time to heal of this and sometimes cutting things off forever is the best thing while his ex needs to take a fucking hint and move the fuck on. And for Bull it'll take a fucking while to heal. I don't support a person while in relationship of not able to move on situation as well and hung of that recent ex. Hence waiting till that person is moved on.

But insulting him like you're better than him with that high eq of yours and even insulting of his crying? Grow the fuck up already. That's not high eq you're talking off, but self-entitled manipulative bitch.

I hope he realised about you and get the fuck out of your sight!

click to expand

Alright. Again, we’ve talked about it. He admitted he was being immature too, so what’s your problem? I’m not saying he’s immature as a whole. I’m talking about how he treated his ex like that. 1-2 months is fine. It’s been a year and she never got the hint, he gotta do something. Even he said that she would never stop. So what’s the point of not getting it straight to her?

I’m not insulting him. I said I liked it in the other post. And I explained about the EQ thing in the other post too. You can call me manipulative bitch, that’s alright. Because you don’t know us. I know him, and it’s not an assumption/ insult about his EQ. You don’t know me, but from what I’ve written, you can call me whatever you want based on your own judgement. EQ, as in I’m more sensitive than him.

I’m not saying I’m perfect. But if you can’t say nice thing or give me constructive advice, please just read the thread and leave. It such a mean thing to wish people break up like the way you do 🙂

Posted by jeane

Posted by Skeleton

Posted by CancaGal

Posted by jeane

Posted by CancaGal

Posted by jeane

Posted by CancaGal

He said that after we had a big argument about his ex. His ex was so annoying and I told him to cut her off. He did it, but poorly worded. He said something like “not ready to be friend” and “for a while” to her, and I was not happy with it. I wanted to break up with him, I thought that he was waiting my time. He cried and said that he would marry me so that I can’t leave him. He did call my parents to ask for the permission to marry me and took me to the jewelry shop to have a look at the engagement ring.

I’m confused. I do want to marry him, but I think I deserve better. I deserve to be asked when he’s happy, not when he messes shit up. Have told him that I want him to marry me because he truly loves me but not for keeping me around. He said he thought they are the same thing.

Guess my EQ is higher than him. Need some insight from you bulls

omg! congratulations! that is brilliant news.

you've known him for 8 months.

you're telling him who he can and cannot speak to

he proposed when he felt under pressure and in a state of fear

you think that you are smarter and more mature than him

you think that he is not good enough for you

mazel tov! it's going to be great.

I’ve known him more than 1 year. I know, it’s not long enough. I’m not telling him who he can/ cannot speak to. But I won’t let him speak to someone who says things like “tomorrow is our Valentines”. I’m not saying I’m smarter than him, I’m saying that I’m more sensitive than him. And I don’t think that he is not good enough for me, otherwise I’d have dumped him. Don’t be overthinking about my words.

not a whole year?! you've known him for that long? amazing.

" I’m not telling him who he can/ cannot speak to. But I won’t let him speak to someone who says things like “tomorrow is our Valentines”."

read that sentence again.

you said that you deserve better. you said he is not considerate. you said he is immature and he needs to act like an adult.

really, listen to the way you speak about him. you do think you are better than him.

these thoughts would never even enter my mind when talking about my partner, let alone type them out without shame.

don't blame me for what you see when a mirror is held up.

" I’m not telling him who he can/ cannot speak to. But I won’t let him speak to someone who says things like “tomorrow is our Valentines”."

-> I’m a Cancer. I don’t like threats. And friends don’t say things like what she says. And I don’t need to explain what happened between them for you to understand the reason why she needs to get lost. And she’s not his only female friends.

-> I deserve better, as being a girl being asked by her lover to marry him, I deserve to be asked in a better situation. I deserve to be asked with a smile, not tears. You may okay with tears, but I know that if he did it out of fear, it wouldn’t last.

-> And yes, he is not considerate. What’s wrong with me telling the truth here? He worn the undies she bought him, kept the “Pretty Girl” in his phone (I had a post about this couple months ago), and even he admitted it. He was immature when he didn’t want to talk to his ex because she hurt him so bad, but instead of talking it out, he’d ignored her for a quite long time. I don’t like her, true. But I don’t like it when my bf treating people like that. Balls up and tell her that he doesn’t want to be friends anymore and stop wasting her time and efforts.

-> “immature” and “act like adult” is what he used when he talked to his ex. My demand was “keep things black and white. You want to be friends again, go tell her that she hurt you and you need her apology. You don’t wanna be friends, go explain the reason to her and cut her off.”

-> We are different. You’re fine with something doesn’t mean that I’m fine with it too. His friendship be him and his ex was over for a long time, before we got together. In my mind, if it’s over, let it go. He ignoring to me is like he’s keeping her there.

You know, you can go fuck yourself with that "immature" assumptions towards your bf of ignoring her while he need to have a damn space to heal or distraction to be able to move on.

People are to damn different of how to handle the break ups and healing afterwards.

It takes a fucking time to heal of this and sometimes cutting things off forever is the best thing while his ex needs to take a fucking hint and move the fuck on. And for Bull it'll take a fucking while to heal. I don't support a person while in relationship of not able to move on situation as well and hung of that recent ex. Hence waiting till that person is moved on.

But insulting him like you're better than him with that high eq of yours and even insulting of his crying? Grow the fuck up already. That's not high eq you're talking off, but self-entitled manipulative bitch.

I hope he realised about you and get the fuck out of your sight!

you know, if my partner proposed to me through tears do you know what my reaction would be? fuck, please don't be upset. let's talk about it and make it right. it would give me physical pain to see him like that. i wouldn't be saying that i deserve better because i wanted to be proposed to under better conditions. that response is the height of selfishness.

screw the proposal. if my guy is upset then i am upset alongside him. instead she is talking about going ring shopping. what.the.actual.fuck.

she's missed the point entirely.

click to expand

Thanks jeane. I cried with him at that time. Guys I don’t mention about other things here because i want to stay focus on my question but it doesn’t mean I was manipulative/ abusive. I don’t mention about my emotions because i want to focus on him. Ring shopping happened 2 weeks later that day. And I’m not really talking about that too. Someone mentioned it so I replied.

Alright, I didn’t get your point, but I get it now and I’m dumb. So it would be very nice if you can explain it to me just like how you reply Skeleton. I posted a thread here and I’m willing to listen to your opinions.

That argument happened last month, and we are actually good now. I was not like “let’s go ring shopping tmr” when he was in tears. And I never asked. One weekend we were together, he said “hey babe, I’m looking at the engagement rings right now but it’s overwhelming. Would you like to go to Tiff with me? I need you help. I don’t know what kinda ring that you like.” And I said “Ok, let’s go. I’ll tell you if I like the idea of any rings”. I even told him not to be overthinking about it. I don’t need a fancy ring, I need him and I need us to work.

Guys, there’s a reason why he wants to be with me, i hope you understand it. I don’t need to tell you about how I treat him, he’s the one who feels it. But I appreciate your opinion🙂

Posted by Skeleton

Posted by CancaGal

Posted by Skeleton

Posted by CancaGal

Posted by jeane

Posted by CancaGal

Posted by jeane

Posted by CancaGal

He said that after we had a big argument about his ex. His ex was so annoying and I told him to cut her off. He did it, but poorly worded. He said something like “not ready to be friend” and “for a while” to her, and I was not happy with it. I wanted to break up with him, I thought that he was waiting my time. He cried and said that he would marry me so that I can’t leave him. He did call my parents to ask for the permission to marry me and took me to the jewelry shop to have a look at the engagement ring.

I’m confused. I do want to marry him, but I think I deserve better. I deserve to be asked when he’s happy, not when he messes shit up. Have told him that I want him to marry me because he truly loves me but not for keeping me around. He said he thought they are the same thing.

Guess my EQ is higher than him. Need some insight from you bulls

omg! congratulations! that is brilliant news.

you've known him for 8 months.

you're telling him who he can and cannot speak to

he proposed when he felt under pressure and in a state of fear

you think that you are smarter and more mature than him

you think that he is not good enough for you

mazel tov! it's going to be great.

I’ve known him more than 1 year. I know, it’s not long enough. I’m not telling him who he can/ cannot speak to. But I won’t let him speak to someone who says things like “tomorrow is our Valentines”. I’m not saying I’m smarter than him, I’m saying that I’m more sensitive than him. And I don’t think that he is not good enough for me, otherwise I’d have dumped him. Don’t be overthinking about my words.

not a whole year?! you've known him for that long? amazing.

" I’m not telling him who he can/ cannot speak to. But I won’t let him speak to someone who says things like “tomorrow is our Valentines”."

read that sentence again.

you said that you deserve better. you said he is not considerate. you said he is immature and he needs to act like an adult.

really, listen to the way you speak about him. you do think you are better than him.

these thoughts would never even enter my mind when talking about my partner, let alone type them out without shame.

don't blame me for what you see when a mirror is held up.

" I’m not telling him who he can/ cannot speak to. But I won’t let him speak to someone who says things like “tomorrow is our Valentines”."

-> I’m a Cancer. I don’t like threats. And friends don’t say things like what she says. And I don’t need to explain what happened between them for you to understand the reason why she needs to get lost. And she’s not his only female friends.

-> I deserve better, as being a girl being asked by her lover to marry him, I deserve to be asked in a better situation. I deserve to be asked with a smile, not tears. You may okay with tears, but I know that if he did it out of fear, it wouldn’t last.

-> And yes, he is not considerate. What’s wrong with me telling the truth here? He worn the undies she bought him, kept the “Pretty Girl” in his phone (I had a post about this couple months ago), and even he admitted it. He was immature when he didn’t want to talk to his ex because she hurt him so bad, but instead of talking it out, he’d ignored her for a quite long time. I don’t like her, true. But I don’t like it when my bf treating people like that. Balls up and tell her that he doesn’t want to be friends anymore and stop wasting her time and efforts.

-> “immature” and “act like adult” is what he used when he talked to his ex. My demand was “keep things black and white. You want to be friends again, go tell her that she hurt you and you need her apology. You don’t wanna be friends, go explain the reason to her and cut her off.”

-> We are different. You’re fine with something doesn’t mean that I’m fine with it too. His friendship be him and his ex was over for a long time, before we got together. In my mind, if it’s over, let it go. He ignoring to me is like he’s keeping her there.

You know, you can go fuck yourself with that "immature" assumptions towards your bf of ignoring her while he need to have a damn space to heal or distraction to be able to move on.

People are to damn different of how to handle the break ups and healing afterwards.

It takes a fucking time to heal of this and sometimes cutting things off forever is the best thing while his ex needs to take a fucking hint and move the fuck on. And for Bull it'll take a fucking while to heal. I don't support a person while in relationship of not able to move on situation as well and hung of that recent ex. Hence waiting till that person is moved on.

But insulting him like you're better than him with that high eq of yours and even insulting of his crying? Grow the fuck up already. That's not high eq you're talking off, but self-entitled manipulative bitch.

I hope he realised about you and get the fuck out of your sight!

Alright. Again, we’ve talked about it. He admitted he was being immature too, so what’s your problem? I’m not saying he’s immature as a whole. I’m talking about how he treated his ex like that. 1-2 months is fine. It’s been a year and she never got the hint, he gotta do something. Even he said that she would never stop. So what’s the point of not getting it straight to her?

I’m not insulting him. I said I liked it in the other post. And I explained about the EQ thing in the other post too. You can call me manipulative bitch, that’s alright. Because you don’t know us. I know him, and it’s not an assumption/ insult about his EQ. You don’t know me, but from what I’ve written, you can call me whatever you want based on your own judgement. EQ, as in I’m more sensitive than him.

I’m not saying I’m perfect. But if you can’t say nice thing or give me constructive advice, please just read the thread and leave. It such a mean thing to wish people break up like the way you do 🙂

Boo fucking whoo hoo for asking to be nice while litteraly insulting him with high damn expectations, there are many others who are pointing "friendly" your hipocrispy out but to dumb or plays denial enough while I had enough and be fucking direct of your dumb knukklehead. It's about you and your behavioral.

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I take their opinions into consideration, not yours. And I’m not insulting neither him or you. No need for that language.

Posted by Metatron

Posted by CancaGal

Alright. I’m sorry for not addressing the situation very clear. I love my boyfriend, he’s a wonderful guy. And the thing between him and his ex was the only issue that we had. It’s solved. We are healing after everything we’ve said to each other.

The question I have here is that he asked me the question (I did say yes tho it was not a proper proposal). He said it’s because “I never want to lose you”. I said “That’s not how you keep me around. Marriage is much more than that. I’m staying with you, but please ask the question if that’s what you really want, and you do it out of love”. Then he said “Aren’t they the same thing?”

Ok, is asking someone to marry you because you’re scared of losing them equal asking someone to marry you because you love them and want to make that life time commitment? They’re 2 different things in my mind, and I’d love to know what bulls think about it from your perspective.

perhaps he's just not that romantically inclined or good with words but IMO they're the same sentiment....he doesn't want to lose you because he loves you....

if I always want be around someone, can't imagine life without them, they make me feel comfortable, relaxed, etc. - that's a deep form of love for me....yes I also feel the same way about my couch, and although I can't think of any disanalogies between the two at the moment, I feel like I could with enough time....

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Thanks. That’s all I need to know 🙂

Posted by CancaGal

Thanks jeane. I cried with him at that time. Guys I don’t mention about other things here because i want to stay focus on my question but it doesn’t mean I was manipulative/ abusive. I don’t mention about my emotions because i want to focus on him. Ring shopping happened 2 weeks later that day. And I’m not really talking about that too. Someone mentioned it so I replied.

Alright, I didn’t get your point, but I get it now and I’m dumb. So it would be very nice if you can explain it to me just like how you reply Skeleton. I posted a thread here and I’m willing to listen to your opinions.

That argument happened last month, and we are actually good now. I was not like “let’s go ring shopping tmr” when he was in tears. And I never asked. One weekend we were together, he said “hey babe, I’m looking at the engagement rings right now but it’s overwhelming. Would you like to go to Tiff with me? I need you help. I don’t know what kinda ring that you like.” And I said “Ok, let’s go. I’ll tell you if I like the idea of any rings”. I even told him not to be overthinking about it. I don’t need a fancy ring, I need him and I need us to work.

Guys, there’s a reason why he wants to be with me, i hope you understand it. I don’t need to tell you about how I treat him, he’s the one who feels it. But I appreciate your opinion🙂

i never said you were abusive or manipulative. you're self centred and controlling and i question if you are willing to listen to opinions that don't conform to your expectations (see a pattern?).

i want to pick you up on something though. you were the first to mention the ring shopping. in your first post actually. shall we remind ourselves?

Posted by CancaGal

He said that after we had a big argument about his ex. His ex was so annoying and I told him to cut her off. He did it, but poorly worded. He said something like “not ready to be friend” and “for a while” to her, and I was not happy with it. I wanted to break up with him, I thought that he was waiting my time. He cried and said that he would marry me so that I can’t leave him. He did call my parents to ask for the permission to marry me and took me to the jewelry shop to have a look at the engagement ring.

I’m confused. I do want to marry him, but I think I deserve better. I deserve to be asked when he’s happy, not when he messes shit up. Have told him that I want him to marry me because he truly loves me but not for keeping me around. He said he thought they are the same thing.

Guess my EQ is higher than him. Need some insight from you bulls

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what i am trying to do is to actually hold a mirror up to your own behaviour. i get it, you're a ripe old age of 22, a bit of a know it all, telling him how to behave and when to "balls up" because you have reached your limit. for someone who proclaims to be very sensitive you don't appear that way. instead you start talking shit about threats and demands you made. start calling him out and listing his shortcomings - even as far as criticising his word choice. from your posts you lack self awareness and honestly, you don't come off as very respectful or loving to your partner. maybe there is some sanctimonious judgment there because of how he has handled the situation with his ex.

did you cry with him or just cry at the same time because you were having a big argument about his ex?

so take my opinion as a it was meant (or don't - it makes no difference to me). instead of deconstructing and focusing on this proposal after dating for 8 months, you got bigger issues at play here that need to be addressed before you think of getting married. i would recommend that you grow up a bit and get your head out of your arse and he has to sort himself out too. then work on strengthening your bond. there is lots of time to plan a wedding.

Posted by jeane

Posted by CancaGal

Thanks jeane. I cried with him at that time. Guys I don’t mention about other things here because i want to stay focus on my question but it doesn’t mean I was manipulative/ abusive. I don’t mention about my emotions because i want to focus on him. Ring shopping happened 2 weeks later that day. And I’m not really talking about that too. Someone mentioned it so I replied.

Alright, I didn’t get your point, but I get it now and I’m dumb. So it would be very nice if you can explain it to me just like how you reply Skeleton. I posted a thread here and I’m willing to listen to your opinions.

That argument happened last month, and we are actually good now. I was not like “let’s go ring shopping tmr” when he was in tears. And I never asked. One weekend we were together, he said “hey babe, I’m looking at the engagement rings right now but it’s overwhelming. Would you like to go to Tiff with me? I need you help. I don’t know what kinda ring that you like.” And I said “Ok, let’s go. I’ll tell you if I like the idea of any rings”. I even told him not to be overthinking about it. I don’t need a fancy ring, I need him and I need us to work.

Guys, there’s a reason why he wants to be with me, i hope you understand it. I don’t need to tell you about how I treat him, he’s the one who feels it. But I appreciate your opinion🙂

i never said you were abusive or manipulative. you're self centred and controlling and i question if you are willing to listen to opinions that don't conform to your expectations (see a pattern?).

i want to pick you up on something though. you were the first to mention the ring shopping. in your first post actually. shall we remind ourselves?

Posted by CancaGal

He said that after we had a big argument about his ex. His ex was so annoying and I told him to cut her off. He did it, but poorly worded. He said something like “not ready to be friend” and “for a while” to her, and I was not happy with it. I wanted to break up with him, I thought that he was waiting my time. He cried and said that he would marry me so that I can’t leave him. He did call my parents to ask for the permission to marry me and took me to the jewelry shop to have a look at the engagement ring.

I’m confused. I do want to marry him, but I think I deserve better. I deserve to be asked when he’s happy, not when he messes shit up. Have told him that I want him to marry me because he truly loves me but not for keeping me around. He said he thought they are the same thing.

Guess my EQ is higher than him. Need some insight from you bulls

what i am trying to do is to actually hold a mirror up to your own behaviour. i get it, you're a ripe old age of 22, a bit of a know it all, telling him how to behave and when to "balls up" because you have reached your limit. for someone who proclaims to be very sensitive you don't appear that way. instead you start talking shit about threats and demands you made. start calling him out and listing his shortcomings - even as far as criticising his word choice. from your posts you lack self awareness and honestly, you don't come off as very respectful or loving to your partner. maybe there is some sanctimonious judgment there because of how he has handled the situation with his ex.

did you cry with him or just cry at the same time because you were having a big argument about his ex?

so take my opinion as a it was meant (or don't - it makes no difference to me). instead of deconstructing and focusing on this proposal after dating for 8 months, you got bigger issues at play here that need to be addressed before you think of getting married. i would recommend that you grow up a bit and get your head out of your arse and he has to sort himself out too. then work on strengthening your bond. there is lots of time to plan a wedding.

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I get it. Thank you for your input. That’s all I ask for.

I mentioned the ring shopping along with he calling my parents. Those are two things he already did after what he said, was just the extra info that’s his words come with actions.

Right. So at the time when I did all those to him, i thought i was right. Everyone is different, and they have different ways. You’re now telling me how my actions look like to you from your perspective, I can see that I was wrong. I’m not going to apologise him tho, I already did it and I know that it would be very tiring if I bring this up again. I won’t make the same mistake, and I will try to look at things from his perspective too. You’re right about we need to deal with this first.

I cried because he cried. When he started to cry i shut my god damn mouth up, hug him and cry with him.

Posted by Black-Mamba

he's a decade older

just EWWWWWWWWWWWWW BARF

LOL. My dad is 13 year older than my mom. Mom says it’s my gene 😂

Posted by CancaGal

Posted by Black-Mamba

he's a decade older

just EWWWWWWWWWWWWW BARF

LOL. My dad is 13 year older than my mom. Mom says it’s my gene 😂

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Just want to say that mentioning that someone’s EQ is lower than yours IS disrespectful AND insulting to that person.

Something fucked up in the way you are fighting in this thread. What are you fighting FOR?

You marrying him or not is your problem.

Do or don’t - how is it Dxp related issue?

You don’t seem welcoming opinions.

So go in peace and have a nice life!

What else is there to say—🤷‍♀️