is it worth to increase my value in his eyes?

Hello,

how can i increase value in men's eyes?

It dont ask this question in astrological way.

I am just curious of your opinion.

I struggle with getting/having a man.

I have standards but i do not behave like a queen bee or an ice queen.

ALl of my life i have thought that normal relations communication count- of course not.

I didnt know how to play a flirt game.

I am 28.

I havent had anyone in 3 years. Even before my relations have been short because men usually left me or chose the other women instead of me.

I started woking on myself but in a way that its not visible. I didnt put anything on fb or instagram. I started doing my thing.



For example i had a short relationship with some men 2.5 years ago. He didnt want anything serious but also didnt want to tell me this. It was a lot of chasing, my broken heart, me being offended. When i gained some popularity he wanted me back but had a backup plan with other woman that actually he chose faster than me ( again).

It was harsh. After some time when i got comfortable and started flirting again , i had inner blockages and men actually saw that inside me. They were scared or behaved in a weird way like a Father to me.

SO i must have had those weak vibrations around me.

But anyway. I deleted my ex from social media.I went abroad. I studies i worked in my profession. I came back last september. And actually i saw him twice.

Its weird but I still feel hurt ? Or kind of that we didnt make it? I havent had any normal serious relationship between.

He had several like 3 or sth like that...

ANd now i do not know.

Should i be friends with him or not? He has a little stress when he sees me.

We saw each other in october 2017 on a party- he was scared of me.

I have this problem because i like him and maybe now i am more mature- he is as well more mature. But actually i dont know if its worth being friends or not?

It was a big drama. but actually i have an inner pride that tells me ; if you dont wanna be with me you cant be my friend. if you left me its like it is.

so im not sure if i just let it go or being normal?

he was getting jealous of me flirting with others but it was in the whole 2016. but didnt make any move.when i started doing moves he was pulling away. then i moved abroad. when i came back he was scared of me but 'observing'



should i put him in my life again or not?

i also get jealous sometimes when i see him flirt with others...

should i work somehow on myself and try to catch him or would it be worthless?

its sad.

I would improve myself for myself not because I want to catch a man.

You said that he hurt you and left you for another woman. He didn’t seem like he respected you. That it’s what I would demand of him, not trying to improve my self to catch him again. Let him fight for you if he really wants you. He is the one that did wrong and has to prove himself to you.

No, you should not get this guy back into your life because you're not over him. Why would you want to get back with someone who toyed with you in the past? As you said, he broke up with you, then wanted you back, then chose another woman over you. We all want what we can't have, so it's obvious that this guy has emotionally manipulated you into obsessing over him. (Hint: There's no reason your should know how many people he's dated since you broke up.)

Furthermore unless you're trying to rekindle a romantic relationship (not recommended in this case), trying to be friends when you have unrequited feelings is a recipe for disaster. Don't become "friends" with a person when you clearly want MORE than friendship. Also know that exes are exes for a reason. Sure, it's possible that this guy has changed in the last 3 years. It's also possible that the reasons you broke up will still be there if you got back together.

The reason you haven't had a relationship in years is because your past emotional baggage is creating emotional/mental blocks. As you've already said, other men can pick up on your "blockages". You'll need to get over ex if you expect to start anything new with another person.

You mentioned that you started improving yourself. How have you been going about this? Remember that self improvement is for yourSELF. Don't improve your circumstances as a way get into a relationship. Improve yourself because you deserve to have a great life that will easily attract great people to you. You won't need to worry about keeping a man when you're being the best version of yourself. Just remain vigilant and focus on creating a great life for yourself.

thank you so much for the time you spent answering my question.

i really appreciate it.

yes, i will not be friends with him again. if he wants to be friends or something more he will do it.

men like to chase. if he likes me maybe in 10 years he will come back.

now i am focusing on myself.

i am doing a lot of projects and etc. iexcercise almost everyday. i feel better.

but sometimes i think as well.

i do not believe in myself as i did before.

its not about him. its also about past friends.

weird depression atmosphere rather focused on being bad and not doing things than be the best.

people that were telling me about my value and self worth- drinking to get drunk and etc- its not the way i am and have never been.

when i abandoned those people there have been rumors, gossips about me and my family, finances, self value and etc that i was inecperienced with men, that usually i had problems with men and etc.

it turned out 1 year after the brak up.

that is why he was hesistating because he KNEW the gossips before as well.



very manpulative company.



im out of it, im good.