Give it Up or Give it a Go?

Libra Sun/Virgo Moon and I've been seeing a Cancer Sun/Sag Moon guy for about 3 weeks. He's very sweet and affectionate. He loves to cuddle. He says that I'm perfect, that he likes me because he can have a conversation with me, he misses me, etc.

Problem is, he works late hours and sleeps all day. When he is up during the day, all we do is watch TV. I'm not looking to paint the town all the time, but due to my limited time off (I have a kid) I really don't want to spend it sleeping and watching TV. I feel like I've stepped into a 5 year relationship vs a brand new one.

My ex knows his ex and her only complaint was that he is hard to get to do things. Is this a Cancer trait? Also, even though he told me he'd love to spend all day with me this past Sun, he barely spoke to me. It was weird.

I've heard Cancer/Libra is a no go. Thoughts?

Hmm I have this placement and the ironic thing is my ex was a Gemini and I had this complaint about him lol.

Maybe it's is work/sleep schedule that's making him "lazy" since he stays up I'm assuming he's lacking sleep and so he is not motivated to do anything. What is his Mars?

And he smokes weed and drinks, lol. He co-owns a bar.

His Mars is in Cancer.

Cancers are homebodies. But with his Sag moon he should love adventures, outdoors, travelling etc.
Could you plan a weekend trip somewhere with him?

Posted by confusedlibra78
And he smokes weed and drinks, lol. He co-owns a bar.

His Mars is in Cancer.

Omg this right here!!! My ex smoked and drank a lot which demotivated him to do anything outside the circumference of his parents house... Yeah he lived with his folks at 32 years old :/

I don't think this is so much a sun sign thing as a guy who co-owns a bar (probably closing things down and not getting to bed until 3 am), drinks, and smokes weed.
May be a nice guy, but aside from the drink and weed, he may not always have the energy. And the drinking and weed don't help.

Posted by CancerOnTheCusp
I don't think this is so much a sun sign thing as a guy who co-owns a bar (probably closing things down and not getting to bed until 3 am), drinks, and smokes weed.
May be a nice guy, but aside from the drink and weed, he may not always have the energy. And the drinking and weed don't help.

I know this can be a tough question for a Libra, but what are you looking for out of this?

Posted by confusedlibra78
Libra Sun/Virgo Moon and I've been seeing a Cancer Sun/Sag Moon guy for about 3 weeks. He's very sweet and affectionate. He loves to cuddle. He says that I'm perfect, that he likes me because he can have a conversation with me, he misses me, etc.

Problem is, he works late hours and sleeps all day. When he is up during the day, all we do is watch TV. I'm not looking to paint the town all the time, but due to my limited time off (I have a kid) I really don't want to spend it sleeping and watching TV. I feel like I've stepped into a 5 year relationship vs a brand new one.

My ex knows his ex and her only complaint was that he is hard to get to do things. Is this a Cancer trait? Also, even though he told me he'd love to spend all day with me this past Sun, he barely spoke to me. It was weird.

I've heard Cancer/Libra is a no go. Thoughts?

Don't lose hope.

Posted by confusedlibra78
Libra Sun/Virgo Moon and I've been seeing a Cancer Sun/Sag Moon guy for about 3 weeks. He's very sweet and affectionate. He loves to cuddle. He says that I'm perfect, that he likes me because he can have a conversation with me, he misses me, etc.

Problem is, he works late hours and sleeps all day. When he is up during the day, all we do is watch TV. I'm not looking to paint the town all the time, but due to my limited time off (I have a kid) I really don't want to spend it sleeping and watching TV. I feel like I've stepped into a 5 year relationship vs a brand new one.

My ex knows his ex and her only complaint was that he is hard to get to do things. Is this a Cancer trait? Also, even though he told me he'd love to spend all day with me this past Sun, he barely spoke to me. It was weird.

I've heard Cancer/Libra is a no go. Thoughts?

Don't lose hope.

Posted by CancerOnTheCusp

Posted by CancerOnTheCusp
I don't think this is so much a sun sign thing as a guy who co-owns a bar (probably closing things down and not getting to bed until 3 am), drinks, and smokes weed.
May be a nice guy, but aside from the drink and weed, he may not always have the energy. And the drinking and weed don't help.

I know this can be a tough question for a Libra, but what are you looking for out of this?

click to expand

Haha! Well, I've dated a lot of really douchy guys and he's the first one that seems to be genuinely decent. Good values, treats me well, etc. I have a 5 year old, and while he loves kids (don't worry, he hasn't met mine) I can't imagine a life with a guy who doesn't leave his house and smokes and drinks all day.

Posted by SensitiveBlues
You should leave it alone!

Can you elaborate?

Posted by CancerOnTheCusp
I don't think this is so much a sun sign thing as a guy who co-owns a bar (probably closing things down and not getting to bed until 3 am), drinks, and smokes weed.
May be a nice guy, but aside from the drink and weed, he may not always have the energy. And the drinking and weed don't help.

True. I also found out tonight from my ex, who knows his ex, that he's been depressed for awhile. I really like him and hate that he's in this place, but I can't save him.

Posted by LadyNeptune
Cancers are homebodies. But with his Sag moon he should love adventures, outdoors, travelling etc.
Could you plan a weekend trip somewhere with him?

He's talked about doing things, dinner out, golf, baseball games, but he is always sleeping or watching TV. I don't think I could get him out of the house if I tried.

Posted by confusedlibra78

Posted by CancerOnTheCusp

Posted by CancerOnTheCusp
I don't think this is so much a sun sign thing as a guy who co-owns a bar (probably closing things down and not getting to bed until 3 am), drinks, and smokes weed.
May be a nice guy, but aside from the drink and weed, he may not always have the energy. And the drinking and weed don't help.

I know this can be a tough question for a Libra, but what are you looking for out of this?

Haha! Well, I've dated a lot of really douchy guys and he's the first one that seems to be genuinely decent. Good values, treats me well, etc. I have a 5 year old, and while he loves kids (don't worry, he hasn't met mine) I can't imagine a life with a guy who doesn't leave his house and smokes and drinks all day.

click to expand

Wow, this sounds like what I went through with my ex for 4 years...it really just became too much for my wondering soul. I craved adventure and he didn't nor could understand it. He was content with just smoking and drinking at home. I would say "leave it"

Posted by Moonbutter

Posted by confusedlibra78
And he smokes weed and drinks, lol. He co-owns a bar.

His Mars is in Cancer.

Omg this right here!!! My ex smoked and drank a lot which demotivated him to do anything outside the circumference of his parents house... Yeah he lived with his folks at 32 years old :/

click to expand

Yikes!!! How did you put up with it and how did you break it off?

Posted by confusedlibra78

Posted by CancerOnTheCusp

Posted by CancerOnTheCusp
I don't think this is so much a sun sign thing as a guy who co-owns a bar (probably closing things down and not getting to bed until 3 am), drinks, and smokes weed.
May be a nice guy, but aside from the drink and weed, he may not always have the energy. And the drinking and weed don't help.

I know this can be a tough question for a Libra, but what are you looking for out of this?

Haha! Well, I've dated a lot of really douchy guys and he's the first one that seems to be genuinely decent. Good values, treats me well, etc. I have a 5 year old, and while he loves kids (don't worry, he hasn't met mine) I can't imagine a life with a guy who doesn't leave his house and smokes and drinks all day.

click to expand

Maybe you should talk to him about it.
Not in an accusatory way, or in a "my needs" way, but let him know the things you like about him but also balance it with his "tendencies" to stay home, etc. Frame it as "I'd like to [enter activity here} but we never seem to have an opportunity--that sort of thing.
And let him talk.

Posted by SensitiveBlues

Posted by confusedlibra78

Posted by SensitiveBlues
You should leave it alone!

Can you elaborate?

You're too different! Even with his sag moon. Crabs are homebodies until we don't want to be homebodies usually during vacation we got nuts

You're incompatible

click to expand

Not necessarily. Yeah, Crabs like having their retreat, but what the OP is describing is something different that isn't necessarily astro related.

Posted by SensitiveBlues

Posted by CancerOnTheCusp

Posted by confusedlibra78

Posted by CancerOnTheCusp

Posted by CancerOnTheCusp
I don't think this is so much a sun sign thing as a guy who co-owns a bar (probably closing things down and not getting to bed until 3 am), drinks, and smokes weed.
May be a nice guy, but aside from the drink and weed, he may not always have the energy. And the drinking and weed don't help.

I know this can be a tough question for a Libra, but what are you looking for out of this?

Haha! Well, I've dated a lot of really douchy guys and he's the first one that seems to be genuinely decent. Good values, treats me well, etc. I have a 5 year old, and while he loves kids (don't worry, he hasn't met mine) I can't imagine a life with a guy who doesn't leave his house and smokes and drinks all day.

Maybe you should talk to him about it.
Not in an accusatory way, or in a "my needs" way, but let him know the things you like about him but also balance it with his "tendencies" to stay home, etc. Frame it as "I'd like to [enter activity here} but we never seem to have an opportunity--that sort of thing.
And let him talk.

Why ? Why bother to change his essence to make this person happy?

I wouldn't do it...

Not to say don't like going out but she's never going to be satisfied

Libras love dinners and people and shopping

Yikes

click to expand

Its not about changing him. She already said he expressed an interest in doing this or that. I'm not sure its necessarily idle chatter, he needs a nudge.

Posted by CancerOnTheCusp

Posted by confusedlibra78

Posted by CancerOnTheCusp

Posted by CancerOnTheCusp
I don't think this is so much a sun sign thing as a guy who co-owns a bar (probably closing things down and not getting to bed until 3 am), drinks, and smokes weed.
May be a nice guy, but aside from the drink and weed, he may not always have the energy. And the drinking and weed don't help.

I know this can be a tough question for a Libra, but what are you looking for out of this?

Haha! Well, I've dated a lot of really douchy guys and he's the first one that seems to be genuinely decent. Good values, treats me well, etc. I have a 5 year old, and while he loves kids (don't worry, he hasn't met mine) I can't imagine a life with a guy who doesn't leave his house and smokes and drinks all day.

Maybe you should talk to him about it.
Not in an accusatory way, or in a "my needs" way, but let him know the things you like about him but also balance it with his "tendencies" to stay home, etc. Frame it as "I'd like to [enter activity here} but we never seem to have an opportunity--that sort of thing.
And let him talk.

click to expand

Yes. Talk about all of it. Are you willing to be there? For him? After a long night of trying to make a dream work? If so work it out.

Posted by SensitiveBlues

Posted by confusedlibra78

Posted by SensitiveBlues
You should leave it alone!

Can you elaborate?

You're too different! Even with his sag moon. Crabs are homebodies until we don't want to be homebodies usually during vacation we got nuts

You're incompatible

click to expand

Yes and no...it depends

Posted by confusedlibra78
Libra Sun/Virgo Moon and I've been seeing a Cancer Sun/Sag Moon guy for about 3 weeks. He's very sweet and affectionate. He loves to cuddle. He says that I'm perfect, that he likes me because he can have a conversation with me, he misses me, etc.

Problem is, he works late hours and sleeps all day. When he is up during the day, all we do is watch TV. I'm not looking to paint the town all the time, but due to my limited time off (I have a kid) I really don't want to spend it sleeping and watching TV. I feel like I've stepped into a 5 year relationship vs a brand new one.

My ex knows his ex and her only complaint was that he is hard to get to do things. Is this a Cancer trait? Also, even though he told me he'd love to spend all day with me this past Sun, he barely spoke to me. It was weird.

I've heard Cancer/Libra is a no go. Thoughts?

It can work it will just be difficult. Aries with Libra moon dated Cancer with Taurus moon for 2 years.

Posted by confusedlibra78

Posted by Moonbutter

Posted by confusedlibra78
And he smokes weed and drinks, lol. He co-owns a bar.

His Mars is in Cancer.

Omg this right here!!! My ex smoked and drank a lot which demotivated him to do anything outside the circumference of his parents house... Yeah he lived with his folks at 32 years old :/

Yikes!!! How did you put up with it and how did you break it off?

click to expand

Well I broke up with him about 3 times for short periods when I couldn't take it anymore. I even convinced myself that having a guy friend to do fun things with was ok even though the guy wanted more... Sigh...I had to ween myself from him starting mentally, physically, emotionally.

It's been about year and a half and I still miss him 😢 Best to walk away now if this is who he is... But it could just be his lifestyle so you gotta find out. Best of luck girl!

What days does he have off during the week?

Just get a gay bestie. Well you're a Libra you should have 4 of them.

Posted by Moonbutter

Posted by confusedlibra78

Posted by Moonbutter

Posted by confusedlibra78
And he smokes weed and drinks, lol. He co-owns a bar.

His Mars is in Cancer.

Omg this right here!!! My ex smoked and drank a lot which demotivated him to do anything outside the circumference of his parents house... Yeah he lived with his folks at 32 years old :/

Yikes!!! How did you put up with it and how did you break it off?

Well I broke up with him about 3 times for short periods when I couldn't take it anymore. I even convinced myself that having a guy friend to do fun things with was ok even though the guy wanted more... Sigh...I had to ween myself from him starting mentally, physically, emotionally.

It's been about year and a half and I still miss him 😢 Best to walk away now if this is who he is... But it could just be his lifestyle so you gotta find out. Best of luck girl!

click to expand

Yeah, she needs to feel him out.
If all he does is talk in circles, she's got her answer.

I think Give it a try. If it doesnt work out then it doesnt work out -- you are both old enough and experienced enough to know quickly and should be able to amicably split if that is the case.

Just get him to go out later, on his hours. Sounds like he's a good guy just needs a kick in the pants. He may not realize this is not ok with you. If he cares for you,he'll want to make you happy as well.