I need advice on a cancer man

I'm a Scorpio and I've been talking to this cancer guy for like a month and half

And everything was good but now its like he's distant and he isn't cute or like he seems he's not Interested but then he will reassure me that he is and be affectionate for a day or so.

Like I get that when they first like you they flirt and very affectionate and then when they realize they have serious feelings for you is when they put their guard up and become hot and cold! Is that true?

I like him a lot but I hate this feeling of like he's not into me but he says he is, like sometimes I don't wanna eat. But then he reassured me and it makes me feel better but for how long?

Is it worth it? Should I keep trying??

I already made a promise with that we wouldn't talk to other people so I don't wanna go behind his back and talk to other people and I don't wanna tell him I take it back either.


I'm just puzzled and don't know what to do?

Posted by LemonLime
you're making it more complicated than it is. What he SAYS and what he DOES are very different. He's doing an awful lot of talking but not showing you anything on a consistent basis. Again, it seems like you are more into it than he is.

If it's bothering you THAT much, you need to talk to him about what your "relationship" is exactly and how you feel. We can only guess and make assumptions but you won't know for sure unless you ask him directly.

What do you mean im making it more complicated?
So he's all talk? Even though he's like I wanna see you if he really did he would?

I do talk to him about it and he tells me of course I like you I hate when you ask me that ...

Honestly I feel like I'm more in this than you

And honestly it's making me upset.

Him: :/ I don't know what to tell you. I think it's just my personality and you don't understand.

So you arent into it huh

Him: No that's not what I'm saying

Then what?

Him: You mistake my not being super chatty for disinterest and that's just not the case

Well you use to be and now it's less and less

Him: It's because I'm comfortable with you. That's seriously all it is.

I'm trying to understand you and be patient but how am I suppose to get to know you more

Him: I'll tell you whatever you want to know and text you whatever you u want me to but I'm bad at opening up unless I'm prompted

Like I said I'm not rushing you into anything your not comfortable with, and I am willing to wait for however long it takes but you have to realize you're making me feel like your not interested. So I guess we both just need to communicate better

Him:

Him:

Him: That's not the case. I guarantee it

Him: I promise seriously

ACCIDENTLY POSTE😱 but yeah our convo right now

Dude..just relax..take a step back and stop pressuring him...let him think about shit for awhile, that's what they do. Mine does they all do. If he comes back and is into you, great, if not..screw him.

Also it sounds like he's being completely honest so just back off a bit and have faith. Be happy he digs you.

Posted by boxcarmirnta
Dude..just relax..take a step back and stop pressuring him...let him think about shit for awhile, that's what they do. Mine does they all do. If he comes back and is into you, great, if not..screw him.

Trust me I don't push him at all, like I've been so patient with him.
I don't push him or bug bum at all

But how much more can I take? That's why I'm asking. How am I suppose to know how he feels that's why am I asking? So I did have a right to ask him this is why I'm confused

^faceroll nailed it. I'm not sure what he's not giving you, but he seems to be answering yr questions very honestly. Any more and you're gonna be way high maintenance in his eyes...drop it. Let it breathe and just see what happens now..hopefully you'll continue hanging out n being happy together...

I'm sorry i think I'm allowed to ask because I didn't know where we stand


How am I suppose to know

He use to text me be all affectionate and reassuring all the time

If you like someone you don't stop texting them
How am I suppose to know

I mean I can see if we were in a long term but I'm still getting to know the guy and how am I suppose to know if he doesn't hang with me or texts me hardly

Actions speak louder than words

Posted by faceroll
you asked him and he said things were fine. people cool down with talking 24/7 once they're comfortable with things and are not in chase mode anymore. you're wanting it to stay like it is in the beginning. but relationships don't stay like that forever. eventually they take their head out of your ass and go back to doing all the things they did before. and that's okay.

at this point you know things are okay. you need to be okay with that. and if you can't you should walk away. he's told you where he stands. and he reassured you. you know exactly where you stand now. so don't say you don't.

what you're wanting is for it to be the courting stage forever which doesn't happen in real life. people have lives to live.

Like I said we have been going at it for a month and 13 days
I feel like this is still getting to know each other and hanging out
I think we have only hung out 3/4 times if he really like me like he says he does he would make a better effort in getting to know me.
How can he comfortable with me if it's only been a month and hung out 4 times?

I was giving him his space and honestly this is like the first time me asking him cause I know not to rush it but if I didn't know where we stand I was going to ask him.

I'm sorry I needed to know where we stand cause you don't get comfortable after a month.

Posted by libraqueen
My ex pulled the same crap. It wasn't worth it. I don't understand how someone can bother you all day everyday and as soon as they "have" you they pull away. It isn't fair and is very misleading, right? Needless to say that relationship ended fast. I don't miss him. It's not worth it, you have to make it clear from the start you need attention otherwise you'll end up attacking and pressuring him like you are now. I'm talking to a Cancer guy right now too but he hasn't said he likes me yet (shows it but hasn't actually said it) so when he does I plan on letting him know I need attention. I'm a libra!!! Lol

I'm not even asking for attention especially his full dying attention
I'm asking him to communicate with me and get to know me if he's really interested like he says

I know he's busy with work, but you can at least make time and effort to talk to me.

Don't tell me stuff unless you mean it

There is nothing wrong with asking where you stand!! But he gave you the answer...i would recommend just being ok where yr at. And if you're not then get away from him, if he's not giving you what you need! Its ok to just chill and see what happens....its still early..

I am a Scorpio woman myself and I have been in two very serious relationships with Cancer men. I understand how frustrating it can be when they act as if they cannot get enough and then they all of asudden pull away. I feel they are very shy at times and they do tend to go into their shells to hide. My advice is just be patient and give it time. My first love was a Cancer and it took him four months to ask me out. It drove me absolutely crazy because I didn't know where I stood with him. I believe that they take their relationships very seriously and so they tend to proceed with caution in order to protect their hearts. I think that us Scorpios are very dominant and when we know that we want someone, we don't want to waste any time. With Cancers it's just different though. I think they tend to step back from a situation in order to truly process it. That way they can figure out what they want. So just try your best to relax, even though I know that it can be easier said than done. And just try to give him some space and do not push him anymore. I feel like that will definitely give you the opposite results of what you want. Hopefully it all works out, because I honestly feel that Cancers and Scorpios can make for one amazing match.

Posted by ScorpioSerenity
I am a Scorpio woman myself and I have been in two very serious relationships with Cancer men. I understand how frustrating it can be when they act as if they cannot get enough and then they all of asudden pull away. I feel they are very shy at times and they do tend to go into their shells to hide. My advice is just be patient and give it time. My first love was a Cancer and it took him four months to ask me out. It drove me absolutely crazy because I didn't know where I stood with him. I believe that they take their relationships very seriously and so they tend to proceed with caution in order to protect their hearts. I think that us Scorpios are very dominant and when we know that we want someone, we don't want to waste any time. With Cancers it's just different though. I think they tend to step back from a situation in order to truly process it. That way they can figure out what they want. So just try your best to relax, even though I know that it can be easier said than done. And just try to give him some space and do not push him anymore. I feel like that will definitely give you the opposite results of what you want. Hopefully it all works out, because I honestly feel that Cancers and Scorpios can make for one amazing match.

This is Cancer in a nutshell. You get us! 😄

Yes we feel the intensity, just as much as Scorpio, but we do step back and process before moving forward again. As soon as you get a Cancer's trust you'll be shocked and surprised by the flood of everything: intensity, passion, etc.

Haha really? Well I suppose after being in two very serious relationships with Cancers, I know some things. 😉 I absolutely adore you guys though. I have found no other sign that matches my emotions better than you do.

Just dissappear for a while. He will be back

It has only been a month so I would suggest keep talking to him for a few more months and if he is still hot and cold and it makes you uncomfortable then seek to find another person. Speaking to other people shouldnt hurt if you are not in a commitment. One thing I can say as a Cancer woman I myself am hot and cold. I personally do not like Cancer men because of this trait so I only date men who are not bothered by the change in my temperatures, in fact it turns them on. Some men like the challenge but me personally I am not into men who share this trait with me. It up to you and how it makes you feel. I would say if hang on a bit more and if it doesnt work then let it go. who can give you what you are looking for,

Oh dear. Lol.

My only advice is to back off. That’s hard I know, but you have to. I’ve read an experienced (even though my endings with this sign was not good, there were good parts) the more you push the more they clam up. Cancers cannot be pushed. You push they move slower. They move at their own pace.

I don’t do well with Cancers anyway to be frank, I simply don’t have the patients. However I will say they are very sweet, and always lovey dovey AT FIRST. I had one like that, and he was long distance. For the first few weeks, he was like a cupcake, soft and sweet and full of love. The next thing I knew he just backed off. I panicked a little, tried to ask him what was up, he gave me some blown off answer so me being the Libra I am, I took his nonchalant, calm, cooled off behavior as a need for space. So I gave him some. I backed off, and he freaked out. Started calling and texting, and became a little fussy over me. At first it was cute, but then it came off insecure. I flat out told him dude, if you wont open your mouth, I have no choice but to read your actions and your actions said you needed space so that’s what I gave you. He promptly told me, you read wrong and I don’t want space!

I laughed, and told him to get on a flight to come see me. Sheesh, they can be crybabies. You’re a Scorp tho so I’m sure you’ll love every minute of it.