Leave him....

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CalmCrab22
@CalmCrab22
10 YearsCancer

Comments: 1 · Posts: 399 · Topics: 10
Posted by Moonbutter
Posted by CalmCrab22
That's the opinion of everyone on dxp .....



Well when you have a great marriage for 10+ years then give direct advice. Otherwise why not try real life experience examples.

Keep your Hershey squirts to yourself. You just want to keep everyone unhappy.

I'm happy! ?? can't touch me #hammertime
What are the issues between you guys?
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Idk who you're referring to. I have no issues. I just don't think every one should be so quick to tell another person to pull the plug.

This is love it's not always rainbows & cupcakes. We should try to help & not belittle ppl for wanting to be with someone they long for.

Tomorrow the person they love could die & bc of dxp they didn't spend the last day with them.

No one gave me that advice. I've just seen it many times since I've joined & a # of times recently. Just let someone work they the confusion & trip on some things in love so they find the person that will catch them. Stop giving them new shiny shoes to walk away in.
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Moonbutter
@Moonbutter
10 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 14 · Posts: 5192 · Topics: 94
Posted by CalmCrab22
Posted by Moonbutter
Posted by CalmCrab22
That's the opinion of everyone on dxp .....



Well when you have a great marriage for 10+ years then give direct advice. Otherwise why not try real life experience examples.

Keep your Hershey squirts to yourself. You just want to keep everyone unhappy.

I'm happy! ?? can't touch me #hammertime
What are the issues between you guys?
Idk who you're referring to. I have no issues. I just don't think every one should be so quick to tell another person to pull the plug.

This is love it's not always rainbows & cupcakes. We should try to help & not belittle ppl for wanting to be with someone they long for.

Tomorrow the person they love could die & bc of dxp they didn't spend the last day with them.

No one gave me that advice. I've just seen it many times since I've joined & a # of times recently. Just let someone work they the confusion & trip on some things in love so they find the person that will catch them. Stop giving them new shiny shoes to walk away in.

click to expand

I see... I thought you were referring to your situation. All advice from here should be taken with a grain of salt and a shot of vodka 😛
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Moonbutter
@Moonbutter
10 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 14 · Posts: 5192 · Topics: 94
Posted by Moonbutter
Posted by CalmCrab22
Posted by Moonbutter
Posted by CalmCrab22
That's the opinion of everyone on dxp .....



Well when you have a great marriage for 10+ years then give direct advice. Otherwise why not try real life experience examples.

Keep your Hershey squirts to yourself. You just want to keep everyone unhappy.

I'm happy! ?? can't touch me #hammertime
What are the issues between you guys?
Idk who you're referring to. I have no issues. I just don't think every one should be so quick to tell another person to pull the plug.

This is love it's not always rainbows & cupcakes. We should try to help & not belittle ppl for wanting to be with someone they long for.

Tomorrow the person they love could die & bc of dxp they didn't spend the last day with them.

No one gave me that advice. I've just seen it many times since I've joined & a # of times recently. Just let someone work they the confusion & trip on some things in love so they find the person that will catch them. Stop giving them new shiny shoes to walk away in.


I see... I thought you were referring to your situation. All advice from here should be taken with a grain of salt and a shot of vodka 😛
click to expand

Maybe tequila... Hehe
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CalmCrab22
@CalmCrab22
10 YearsCancer

Comments: 1 · Posts: 399 · Topics: 10
Posted by Moonbutter
Posted by CalmCrab22
Posted by Moonbutter
Posted by CalmCrab22
That's the opinion of everyone on dxp .....



Well when you have a great marriage for 10+ years then give direct advice. Otherwise why not try real life experience examples.

Keep your Hershey squirts to yourself. You just want to keep everyone unhappy.

I'm happy! ?? can't touch me #hammertime
What are the issues between you guys?
Idk who you're referring to. I have no issues. I just don't think every one should be so quick to tell another person to pull the plug.

This is love it's not always rainbows & cupcakes. We should try to help & not belittle ppl for wanting to be with someone they long for.

Tomorrow the person they love could die & bc of dxp they didn't spend the last day with them.

No one gave me that advice. I've just seen it many times since I've joined & a # of times recently. Just let someone work they the confusion & trip on some things in love so they find the person that will catch them. Stop giving them new shiny shoes to walk away in.


I see... I thought you were referring to your situation. All advice from here should be taken with a grain of salt and a shot of vodka 😛
click to expand

That should be on the main page
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GFY
@CancerOnTheCusp
12 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 433 · Posts: 8306 · Topics: 311
Posted by ImTheRam
I know i might get crucified here for saying this....but in a way...this is just such a woman thing to do...

"If i am not happy...than you shall not be happy also"


Nah. I see that with women (for the harpies, note I did NOT say "all" or "most"). I have even had a few actually admit that in an unguarded moment.

Still hard to wrap my head around that twisted psychology.
Profile picture of CancerOnTheCusp
GFY
@CancerOnTheCusp
12 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 433 · Posts: 8306 · Topics: 311
Posted by TerramineLight
Posted by CancerOnTheCusp
I laugh at some of the "advice" given here.

The first question that should come into the mind of an OP on any thread when getting some of the "advice" should be: "Does this person have any experience with maintaining a stable, healthy relationship"?

More often than not, IMHO, from what I've seen, the answer is "NO".

Nah see the thing about relationships is that they are very complex and multifaceted. Just because you have problems with relationships, doesn't mean you're not equipped to address specific aspects of it.

Pretty much EVERYONE in this world has some part of relationships they suck at. Even those in happy long lasting relationships. They just happen to neglect areas that don't matter as much.
click to expand

All that wisdom at a mere 22 years of age. I'm impressed.

Trophy for you:

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CalmCrab22
@CalmCrab22
10 YearsCancer

Comments: 1 · Posts: 399 · Topics: 10
Posted by andstrollbot
Posted by CalmCrab22
That's the opinion of everyone on dxp .....



Well when you have a great marriage for 10+ years then give direct advice. Otherwise why not try real life experience examples.

Keep your Hershey squirts to yourself. You just want to keep everyone unhappy.

I'm happy! ?? can't touch me #hammertime
Gurl you're better than that stop texting him and get yourself some Ben and jerry's!
click to expand

Come on you know those types don't have B&G $ ..... Little Debbie all the way
Profile picture of CancerOnTheCusp
GFY
@CancerOnTheCusp
12 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 433 · Posts: 8306 · Topics: 311
Posted by CalmCrab22
Posted by andstrollbot
Posted by CalmCrab22
That's the opinion of everyone on dxp .....



Well when you have a great marriage for 10+ years then give direct advice. Otherwise why not try real life experience examples.

Keep your Hershey squirts to yourself. You just want to keep everyone unhappy.

I'm happy! ?? can't touch me #hammertime
Gurl you're better than that stop texting him and get yourself some Ben and jerry's!
Come on you know those types don't have B&G $ ..... Little Debbie all the way

click to expand

The snack food with a practically infinite shelf life....You would be better off eating the wax fake fruit or loaves of bread on a counter display....
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RabidTalker
@rabidtalker
14 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 746 · Posts: 5608 · Topics: 190
The problem is that there are many ways to sustain a relationship. I give the advice that works for me and my friends. I'm not sure if I'm the one your'e referring to who says to "leave them."

It depends on what your goals are, for some it is obvious it is to be with THIS person at any cost (probably half who post). For others (seems few) it is to be in a happy long term, stable relationship, for yet others it is to have someone you can brag about, to "win" over a person to show your social rank or status.

After a few posts early on I realized that on an anonymous and random astrology forums, there are many people with many different goals. Some aren't even in a relationship of whom they are asking about, others are in high school. So unless it is obvious, I now try to ask their ages, how long they've been in a relationship with the person, where they are in life, etc. That doesn't even scratch the surface of what their value system or culture is (poly-amorous? unequal sexual rights in their culture, more equal depending on whose point of view you take)

I've also noticed that some arent really asking for advice but just want you to tell them that they are right or validate their victimhood. You can tell this because they wont accept anyone's advice other than what their post (or many new posts, threads or new accounts) will hint at. Or after giving their advice there is a miraculous new revelation to paint the person in a bad light. The message is more or less "this guy is a jerk tell me i'm right" or "that guy owes it to me to be with me" In these cases I will definitely say "leave them" for the sake of both people. If I was vindictive I'd tell them to them to stay in something that will ultimately fail or give them false hope, but it's against my values to do that because it will do more harm in the long run. Some with no experience just want the experience so they see more value in it than me that is valid but it's not the advice I'd give. It's all point of view...

Which basically brings me to this: when advice is not wanted and boundaries. I'll give my advice and after I've said my honest views I wont sit there and tell everyone who has a different point of view how wrong they are. It is ultimately up to the person who asks for the advice to decide what to do and if it applies to them.

...and then you have the trolls....
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TaurusBull1977
@TaurusBull1977
16 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 0 · Posts: 4771 · Topics: 30
Posted by TerramineLight
Posted by CancerOnTheCusp
I laugh at some of the "advice" given here.

The first question that should come into the mind of an OP on any thread when getting some of the "advice" should be: "Does this person have any experience with maintaining a stable, healthy relationship"?

More often than not, IMHO, from what I've seen, the answer is "NO".

Nah see the thing about relationships is that they are very complex and multifaceted. Just because you have problems with relationships, doesn't mean you're not equipped to address specific aspects of it.

Pretty much EVERYONE in this world has some part of relationships they suck at. Even those in happy long lasting relationships. They just happen to neglect areas that don't matter as much.
click to expand

Best response

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Gemitati
@Gemitati
10 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 2057 · Posts: 38091 · Topics: 1026
Posted by CancerOnTheCusp
I laugh at some of the "advice" given here.

The first question that should come into the mind of an OP on any thread when getting some of the "advice" should be: "Does this person have any experience with maintaining a stable, healthy relationship"?

More often than not, IMHO, from what I've seen, the answer is "NO".
I was once told by young single woman that her marital status and having kids or not was not relevant when she was giving me marital advice.

And if you don't know I am 50 married over 20 years! Lol

Profile picture of CancerOnTheCusp
GFY
@CancerOnTheCusp
12 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 433 · Posts: 8306 · Topics: 311
Posted by Admiral
Posted by CancerOnTheCusp
I laugh at some of the "advice" given here.

The first question that should come into the mind of an OP on any thread when getting some of the "advice" should be: "Does this person have any experience with maintaining a stable, healthy relationship"?

More often than not, IMHO, from what I've seen, the answer is "NO".
Remember that aqua girl that helped her ex-bf rape a married friend. If that's any example as to how this place where is I don't know.
click to expand


Or the supposed Taurus chick who was having an affair with a married Cancer man, until questions about inconsistencies got too much and her last post was "never mind, he asked me to be another one of his wives" with the OP deleting shortly after. Obvious trolling.
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Silvuh
@Silvuh
9 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 1 · Posts: 630 · Topics: 22
Posted by CancerOnTheCusp
Posted by TerramineLight
Posted by CancerOnTheCusp
I laugh at some of the "advice" given here.

The first question that should come into the mind of an OP on any thread when getting some of the "advice" should be: "Does this person have any experience with maintaining a stable, healthy relationship"?

More often than not, IMHO, from what I've seen, the answer is "NO".

Nah see the thing about relationships is that they are very complex and multifaceted. Just because you have problems with relationships, doesn't mean you're not equipped to address specific aspects of it.

Pretty much EVERYONE in this world has some part of relationships they suck at. Even those in happy long lasting relationships. They just happen to neglect areas that don't matter as much.
All that wisdom at a mere 22 years of age. I'm impressed.

Trophy for you:

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How mature was that though?