Cap man has me irate!

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ladylibra21
@ladylibra21
10 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 9 · Posts: 3024 · Topics: 377
First off let me say this is mostly venting.

So...I told myself New Year's Eve that if I didn't get some kind of contact saying happy new year from this guy then I was done. Because in my head if I mean something to you common sense would say you would wish me a happy new year. So he didn't so I started on my journey of letting go on New Year's Day. I get back to work and this dude is all in my face like constantly in my face like more than he normally is. I'm not paying him much attention because my new resolve is to move past this until I'm able to become friends with him. Near the end of the day he starts whispering stuff under his breath after he passes me. So I cornered him and I say what are you saying under your breath and he says don't worry about it laughing. So yesterday he comes in at the end of the day and we are talking and he is acting strange talking about random things like death a subject he normally stays away from. We also talked about him being passive aggressive and he said he would try to be more cheerful and not be passive aggressive. So sensing that he may need to talk after he made a point to tell me he was just going to sit at home and do nothing that night (as if he was bummed about it) I non-chalanly say let's go out and do karaoke or something and he changes the subject then leaves.

So I tell myself OK let's try this one last time try to ask him to hang out somewhere to see how he reacts. An hour later after I sent a text saying

"But no seriously what are you doing tonight? Let's go get a drink. Drinks on me. I won't make you do karaoke lol"

He replied: "Hey I just got home I would love to just not tonight I'm in a funk extra tired And yes no karaoke."

He use the same excuse he always uses. So I ignored him didn't even write back. He always seems to have time for everybody else but me.

So I was resigned to just let him go and work with him until I find another job. I was to show no emotion about the whole thing today. However, he comes in at the end of the day And says did you go out to karaoke. I look at him and all of my anger returns and I robotically say "No, no I did not. " I walked away and when I come back he had left my desk. He proceeded to walk by 3 times as I ignored him and worked on my time sheet (which I hate doing so you know I was pissed if I'd rather do my time sheet than talk to him).

One time he walked by, he pretended to trip up the stairs and made a big commotion about it limping past my desk to see if I would respond to it and ask if he was OK, I did not ask.

Then when I got up to ask people if they needed help I came back to my desk and my phone had a sticky note on it facedown I picked it up and there was a heart on the sticky note.

I am so mad ?. For someone who doesn't want shit to do with me, who doesn't make me a priority, you want to leave hearts on my phone? If he doesn't like me in that way why is he sending me mixed signals like that!

Is he fucking with my head?

I'm not sure what to do I haven't called him because I'm afraid I'll cuss him out. I could go in tomorrow and treat him like we are just co workers and not friends but I tired that today and failed.

Sigh I need wine for whine tonight. Bottoms up ?.
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ladylibra21
@ladylibra21
10 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 9 · Posts: 3024 · Topics: 377
Posted by Capri-sun
I think he might actually be down & might actually like you...would it have been wrong to ask if he wanted company last night as opposed to going out?

I really think a night "IN" is what you both need...work out some of that tension if you know what I'm saying 😄

🤗 it will be okay
Lol I doubt he would let me come to his house he just let his mother come to his house for the first time over the weekend and he has had that place for three years. Oh believe me there is a lot of sexual tension but at this point I'm just pissed off.
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Aerazo
@Aerazo
8 Years1,000+ PostsAquarius

Comments: 9 · Posts: 2257 · Topics: 92
Posted by ladylibra21
First off let me say this is mostly venting.

So...I told myself New Year's Eve that if I didn't get some kind of contact saying happy new year from this guy then I was done. Because in my head if I mean something to you common sense would say you would wish me a happy new year. So he didn't so I started on my journey of letting go on New Year's Day. I get back to work and this dude is all in my face like constantly in my face like more than he normally is. I'm not paying him much attention because my new resolve is to move past this until I'm able to become friends with him. Near the end of the day he starts whispering stuff under his breath after he passes me. So I cornered him and I say what are you saying under your breath and he says don't worry about it laughing. So yesterday he comes in at the end of the day and we are talking and he is acting strange talking about random things like death a subject he normally stays away from. We also talked about him being passive aggressive and he said he would try to be more cheerful and not be passive aggressive. So sensing that he may need to talk after he made a point to tell me he was just going to sit at home and do nothing that night (as if he was bummed about it) I non-chalanly say let's go out and do karaoke or something and he changes the subject then leaves.

So I tell myself OK let's try this one last time try to ask him to hang out somewhere to see how he reacts. An hour later after I sent a text saying

"But no seriously what are you doing tonight? Let's go get a drink. Drinks on me. I won't make you do karaoke lol"

He replied: "Hey I just got home I would love to just not tonight I'm in a funk extra tired And yes no karaoke."

He use the same excuse he always uses. So I ignored him didn't even write back. He always seems to have time for everybody else but me.

So I was resigned to just let him go and work with him until I find another job. I was to show no emotion about the whole thing today. However, he comes in at the end of the day And says did you go out to karaoke. I look at him and all of my anger returns and I robotically say "No, no I did not. " I walked away and when I come back he had left my desk. He proceeded to walk by 3 times as I ignored him and worked on my time sheet (which I hate doing so you know I was pissed if I'd rather do my time sheet than talk to him).

One time he walked by, he pretended to trip up the stairs and made a big commotion about it limping past my desk to see if I would respond to it and ask if he was OK, I did not ask.

Then when I got up to ask people if they needed help I came back to my desk and my phone had a sticky note on it facedown I picked it up and there was a heart on the sticky note.

I am so mad ?. For someone who doesn't want shit to do with me, who doesn't make me a priority, you want to leave hearts on my phone? If he doesn't like me in that way why is he sending me mixed signals like that!

Is he fucking with my head?

I'm not sure what to do I haven't called him because I'm afraid I'll cuss him out. I could go in tomorrow and treat him like we are just co workers and not friends but I tired that today and failed.

Sigh I need wine for whine tonight. Bottoms up ?.




What is it with Cap me behaving like that? Is it just normal, something we are supposed to "let go" Because they are "that way" or are we just trying to find excuses?

I'm on a similar issue.. this time I even checked your profile to make sure we don't live in the same state talking about the same guy ? I've read your other posts.

I know how you feel, on New Years I sent him a message bc I didn't want to go thru the disappointment of him not saying Happy new years to me ? and be on the same boat as you right now. It's frustrating and it makes me think less of him when I know he's a great guy.

He also stayed home on nye..

Honestly at this point I'm just doing me, because I have already done my part showing him I'm interested and I like him. If a man wants to be with me he should definitely make up his mind about it, I'm not gonna play games or wait around someone who is not sure of what he wants.

I have clearly shown effort to meet, to talk, and he's constantly "falling asleep, or too tired" but would still go to other places and do other things. If I'm not worth a day, 6, or at least 2 hours of his time to see me, then he doesn't deserve me breaking my head thinking what's going on.

Same thing happened when I asked him to go hiking with me, he first said yes, then said no, then he asked if I went... what?? I just said no and acted like nothing happened.

But maybe we should have said something..and flip out on them for acting like that—

I'm no drama queen, so that doesn't go with me

I don't wanna tell you to just let it go and continue acting like if you are okay with everything he does. it obviously irritates you that he behaves this way and you don't want to be on this for months and years...

I'm sure that he likes you, no cap man would just put a heart on a note for nothing, maybe nye doesn't mean anything to him?

I mean if he stayed home on that day and didn't care to "not party on nye" then it's probably not as meaningful as it is to you. But I understand the part where he doesn't wanna go anywhere or spend time.

Does your job have strict rules about dating coworkers?

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ladylibra21
@ladylibra21
10 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 9 · Posts: 3024 · Topics: 377




What is it with Cap me behaving like that? Is it just normal, something we are supposed to "let go" Because they are "that way" or are we just trying to find excuses?

I'm on a similar issue.. this time I even checked your profile to make sure we don't live in the same state talking about the same guy ? I've read your other posts.

I know how you feel, on New Years I sent him a message bc I didn't want to go thru the disappointment of him not saying Happy new years to me ? and be on the same boat as you right now. It's frustrating and it makes me think less of him when I know he's a great guy.

He also stayed home on nye..

Honestly at this point I'm just doing me, because I have already done my part showing him I'm interested and I like him. If a man wants to be with me he should definitely make up his mind about it, I'm not gonna play games or wait around someone who is not sure of what he wants.

I have clearly shown effort to meet, to talk, and he's constantly "falling asleep, or too tired" but would still go to other places and do other things. If I'm not worth a day, 6, or at least 2 hours of his time to see me, then he doesn't deserve me breaking my head thinking what's going on.

Same thing happened when I asked him to go hiking with me, he first said yes, then said no, then he asked if I went... what?? I just said no and acted like nothing happened.

But maybe we should have said something..and flip out on them for acting like that—

I'm no drama queen, so that doesn't go with me





Omg the whole saying yes then changing their mine thing! Lol but if we flipped out on them then they would have an excuse to act they way they do and they would come up with some pessimistic shit like see I knew it was too good to be true I knew you were like this but in reality they create these problems th are afraid of!
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ladylibra21
@ladylibra21
10 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 9 · Posts: 3024 · Topics: 377
Posted by 4ever_confused
I've had a cap act this bizarrely to me too. Found out he's dating a different woman each day yet he can't let go. So frustrating!!
I'm wondering if it's something like that to. Like maybe he has a fuck buddy and he's content with that but some days I want to relationship and I'm the only one he's connected with emotionally but he's not sure if he wants me or not so he's got this in and out thing going on. i'm just guessing at this point

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kdee53
@kdee53
9 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 15 · Topics: 3
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by 4ever_confused
I've had a cap act this bizarrely to me too. Found out he's dating a different woman each day yet he can't let go. So frustrating!!
I'm wondering if it's something like that to. Like maybe he has a fuck buddy and he's content with that but some days I want to relationship and I'm the only one he's connected with emotionally but he's not sure if he wants me or not so he's got this in and out thing going on. i'm just guessing at this point

click to expand

I'm also going through the same thing right now and I'm getting annoyed with it. It's like he's hot for a few days and then he's cold and disappears for 1-2 days like now. Unless he disappeared b/c of what I said via text msg but I dont know now. Last time we hung out in person was mid November. We talk almost everyday and enjoy each other's company for hours on skype. But if he's not talking to me, he's either hanging out with with "family or friends". I have brought up hanging out again, but there's always some excuse; "I'm tired or I have plans already but I'll let you know if anything changes". Mutual friends say to be patient that he's a relationship guy, or that he's single.. and I'm patient, but if a guy is super interested in you, then shouldn't they make it known. Luckily we haven't done anything physical and idk if I want to. Not sure if I could handle doing something and then him "disappearing" again. Stay strong ladylibra218!
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Pink Bird
@pinkbird03
9 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 975 · Posts: 5791 · Topics: 44
Posted by ladylibra21
First off let me say this is mostly venting.

So...I told myself New Year's Eve that if I didn't get some kind of contact saying happy new year from this guy then I was done. Because in my head if I mean something to you common sense would say you would wish me a happy new year. So he didn't so I started on my journey of letting go on New Year's Day. I get back to work and this dude is all in my face like constantly in my face like more than he normally is. I'm not paying him much attention because my new resolve is to move past this until I'm able to become friends with him. Near the end of the day he starts whispering stuff under his breath after he passes me. So I cornered him and I say what are you saying under your breath and he says don't worry about it laughing. So yesterday he comes in at the end of the day and we are talking and he is acting strange talking about random things like death a subject he normally stays away from. We also talked about him being passive aggressive and he said he would try to be more cheerful and not be passive aggressive. So sensing that he may need to talk after he made a point to tell me he was just going to sit at home and do nothing that night (as if he was bummed about it) I non-chalanly say let's go out and do karaoke or something and he changes the subject then leaves.

So I tell myself OK let's try this one last time try to ask him to hang out somewhere to see how he reacts. An hour later after I sent a text saying

"But no seriously what are you doing tonight? Let's go get a drink. Drinks on me. I won't make you do karaoke lol"

He replied: "Hey I just got home I would love to just not tonight I'm in a funk extra tired And yes no karaoke."

He use the same excuse he always uses. So I ignored him didn't even write back. He always seems to have time for everybody else but me.

So I was resigned to just let him go and work with him until I find another job. I was to show no emotion about the whole thing today. However, he comes in at the end of the day And says did you go out to karaoke. I look at him and all of my anger returns and I robotically say "No, no I did not. " I walked away and when I come back he had left my desk. He proceeded to walk by 3 times as I ignored him and worked on my time sheet (which I hate doing so you know I was pissed if I'd rather do my time sheet than talk to him).

One time he walked by, he pretended to trip up the stairs and made a big commotion about it limping past my desk to see if I would respond to it and ask if he was OK, I did not ask.

Then when I got up to ask people if they needed help I came back to my desk and my phone had a sticky note on it facedown I picked it up and there was a heart on the sticky note.

I am so mad ?. For someone who doesn't want shit to do with me, who doesn't make me a priority, you want to leave hearts on my phone? If he doesn't like me in that way why is he sending me mixed signals like that!

Is he fucking with my head?

I'm not sure what to do I haven't called him because I'm afraid I'll cuss him out. I could go in tomorrow and treat him like we are just co workers and not friends but I tired that today and failed.

Sigh I need wine for whine tonight. Bottoms up ?.


I didn't read this yet, but I saw the glass of wine and I'm totally having one with you!! Cheers!
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daron76
@daron76
9 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 3 · Posts: 621 · Topics: 14
Lawd....



Soo maybe its time to call him on his BS? I've been called on mine before. I was young (26). I didn't recognize this woman was interested in me and I thought we were just having a good time . We had been flirting for a while (she was a Leo) according to her- I thought we had just been joking around. One day we were leaving a fundraiser (so we had been drinking a little bit) while we were waiting for her cab she turned to me and said " So am I getting dick tonight or what?" It took that for me to realize what was going on her end. We spent the next 10 yrs as on and off sexual partners and good friends. So, while her method may not be a great for a "relationship" it did work to "get an itch scratched" 😛 .

Not that you should have to put your self out there like that. I'm just sayin...

But, again.... ol boy... smh "utters under breath... this MF right here"
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kdee53
@kdee53
9 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 15 · Topics: 3
Posted by daron76
Lawd....



Soo maybe its time to call him on his BS? I've been called on mine before. I was young (26). I didn't recognize this woman was interested in me and I thought we were just having a good time . We had been flirting for a while (she was a Leo) according to her- I thought we had just been joking around. One day we were leaving a fundraiser (so we had been drinking a little bit) while we were waiting for her cab she turned to me and said " So am I getting dick tonight or what?" It took that for me to realize what was going on her end. We spent the next 10 yrs as on and off sexual partners and good friends. So, while her method may not be a great for a "relationship" it did work to "get an itch scratched" 😛 .

Not that you should have to put your self out there like that. I'm just sayin...

But, again.... ol boy... smh "utters under breath... this MF right here"
hahaha! Since the after the 1st week of my cappy getting to know me, he's been always throwing flirtatious jokes, some innocent, and mostly mildly perverted. I always laugh at it, and still do. In person he's the complete opposite, a reserved gentleman. I'm the type where in order for me to move on to the next step, I need to get to know and trust the person more. I feel like I only know 15% of him since he doesn't open up very much or enjoy being asked too many questions. So it puts me at a confused state since I'm very old school. Not sure how to go forward since I would like to take it "further" and not feel like a piece of meat.
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ladylibra21
@ladylibra21
10 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 9 · Posts: 3024 · Topics: 377
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by Koniuchaa
Posted by ladylibra21
First off let me say this is mostly venting.

So...I told myself New Year's Eve that if I didn't get some kind of contact saying happy new year from this guy then I was done. Because in my head if I mean something to you common sense would say you would wish me a happy new year. So he didn't so I started on my journey of letting go on New Year's Day. I get back to work and this dude is all in my face like constantly in my face like more than he normally is. I'm not paying him much attention because my new resolve is to move past this until I'm able to become friends with him. Near the end of the day he starts whispering stuff under his breath after he passes me. So I cornered him and I say what are you saying under your breath and he says don't worry about it laughing. So yesterday he comes in at the end of the day and we are talking and he is acting strange talking about random things like death a subject he normally stays away from. We also talked about him being passive aggressive and he said he would try to be more cheerful and not be passive aggressive. So sensing that he may need to talk after he made a point to tell me he was just going to sit at home and do nothing that night (as if he was bummed about it) I non-chalanly say let's go out and do karaoke or something and he changes the subject then leaves.

So I tell myself OK let's try this one last time try to ask him to hang out somewhere to see how he reacts. An hour later after I sent a text saying

"But no seriously what are you doing tonight? Let's go get a drink. Drinks on me. I won't make you do karaoke lol"

He replied: "Hey I just got home I would love to just not tonight I'm in a funk extra tired And yes no karaoke."

He use the same excuse he always uses. So I ignored him didn't even write back. He always seems to have time for everybody else but me.

So I was resigned to just let him go and work with him until I find another job. I was to show no emotion about the whole thing today. However, he comes in at the end of the day And says did you go out to karaoke. I look at him and all of my anger returns and I robotically say "No, no I did not. " I walked away and when I come back he had left my desk. He proceeded to walk by 3 times as I ignored him and worked on my time sheet (which I hate doing so you know I was pissed if I'd rather do my time sheet than talk to him).

One time he walked by, he pretended to trip up the stairs and made a big commotion about it limping past my desk to see if I would respond to it and ask if he was OK, I did not ask.

Then when I got up to ask people if they needed help I came back to my desk and my phone had a sticky note on it facedown I picked it up and there was a heart on the sticky note.

I am so mad ?. For someone who doesn't want shit to do with me, who doesn't make me a priority, you want to leave hearts on my phone? If he doesn't like me in that way why is he sending me mixed signals like that!

Is he fucking with my head?

I'm not sure what to do I haven't called him because I'm afraid I'll cuss him out. I could go in tomorrow and treat him like we are just co workers and not friends but I tired that today and failed.

Sigh I need wine for whine tonight. Bottoms up ?.


At this point, I'd ask what the heart note business is about. You don't have anything to lose. Just say, 'hey did you see who left this on my phone?'
lol isnt that postit heart cute, OP IS A COLD MONSTER
click to expand

Lmao How am I a cold monster? All I have done is been there for his ass and that was the other thing I was upset yesterday as well and he knew that Talking about "cheer up buttercup." Why should I always be there for him if he's not always there for me?
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ladylibra21
@ladylibra21
10 Years1,000+ Posts

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Posted by MoonyEYES88
It sounds like he likes you and wants to keep you around though it also sounds like he's depressed. a down cappy tends to brood about things. Is depression a possibility? I can imagine if he went out with his friends and not you, it may be because he is comfortable enough with them to not put on a fake smile in front of them...just a guess
Yes he is prone to depression but so am I. He also has a traumatic pass with a relationship but so do I. It is all about what you allowed to let it stop you.
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ladylibra21
@ladylibra21
10 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 9 · Posts: 3024 · Topics: 377
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by Capri-sun
Did he already commit to going to the event with the 3 couples? Maybe that is why the change of plans?
I didn't want to see him on New Year's although it would have been nice I just wanted a fucking phone call.

Oh ok, two separate nights.

Understandable. I'm not a guy, and I happen to be more responsive with things like that. So if someone sends me a message I respond. However it's rare I initiate. Maybe 30% initiate 70% respond.

Honestly, I don't think caps put that much emphasis on things like that...or maybe that's just my own little world that I live in...

click to expand


True he is not really big into holidays he says that he will be bigger into holidays if he ever has kids
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ladylibra21
@ladylibra21
10 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 9 · Posts: 3024 · Topics: 377
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by Koniuchaa
Posted by ladylibra21
First off let me say this is mostly venting.

So...I told myself New Year's Eve that if I didn't get some kind of contact saying happy new year from this guy then I was done. Because in my head if I mean something to you common sense would say you would wish me a happy new year. So he didn't so I started on my journey of letting go on New Year's Day. I get back to work and this dude is all in my face like constantly in my face like more than he normally is. I'm not paying him much attention because my new resolve is to move past this until I'm able to become friends with him. Near the end of the day he starts whispering stuff under his breath after he passes me. So I cornered him and I say what are you saying under your breath and he says don't worry about it laughing. So yesterday he comes in at the end of the day and we are talking and he is acting strange talking about random things like death a subject he normally stays away from. We also talked about him being passive aggressive and he said he would try to be more cheerful and not be passive aggressive. So sensing that he may need to talk after he made a point to tell me he was just going to sit at home and do nothing that night (as if he was bummed about it) I non-chalanly say let's go out and do karaoke or something and he changes the subject then leaves.

So I tell myself OK let's try this one last time try to ask him to hang out somewhere to see how he reacts. An hour later after I sent a text saying

"But no seriously what are you doing tonight? Let's go get a drink. Drinks on me. I won't make you do karaoke lol"

He replied: "Hey I just got home I would love to just not tonight I'm in a funk extra tired And yes no karaoke."

He use the same excuse he always uses. So I ignored him didn't even write back. He always seems to have time for everybody else but me.

So I was resigned to just let him go and work with him until I find another job. I was to show no emotion about the whole thing today. However, he comes in at the end of the day And says did you go out to karaoke. I look at him and all of my anger returns and I robotically say "No, no I did not. " I walked away and when I come back he had left my desk. He proceeded to walk by 3 times as I ignored him and worked on my time sheet (which I hate doing so you know I was pissed if I'd rather do my time sheet than talk to him).

One time he walked by, he pretended to trip up the stairs and made a big commotion about it limping past my desk to see if I would respond to it and ask if he was OK, I did not ask.

Then when I got up to ask people if they needed help I came back to my desk and my phone had a sticky note on it facedown I picked it up and there was a heart on the sticky note.

I am so mad ?. For someone who doesn't want shit to do with me, who doesn't make me a priority, you want to leave hearts on my phone? If he doesn't like me in that way why is he sending me mixed signals like that!

Is he fucking with my head?

I'm not sure what to do I haven't called him because I'm afraid I'll cuss him out. I could go in tomorrow and treat him like we are just co workers and not friends but I tired that today and failed.

Sigh I need wine for whine tonight. Bottoms up ?.


At this point, I'd ask what the heart note business is about. You don't have anything to lose. Just say, 'hey did you see who left this on my phone?'
lol isnt that postit heart cute, OP IS A COLD MONSTER
Lmao How am I a cold monster? All I have done is been there for his ass and that was the other thing I was upset yesterday as well and he knew that Talking about "cheer up buttercup." Why should I always be there for him if he's not always there for me?


sry i didnt mean it, i was just trying to flirt with konichua
click to expand

See!! That's that indirect shit we talking about!! Lmao
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ladylibra21
@ladylibra21
10 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 9 · Posts: 3024 · Topics: 377
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by Koniuchaa
Posted by ladylibra21
First off let me say this is mostly venting.

So...I told myself New Year's Eve that if I didn't get some kind of contact saying happy new year from this guy then I was done. Because in my head if I mean something to you common sense would say you would wish me a happy new year. So he didn't so I started on my journey of letting go on New Year's Day. I get back to work and this dude is all in my face like constantly in my face like more than he normally is. I'm not paying him much attention because my new resolve is to move past this until I'm able to become friends with him. Near the end of the day he starts whispering stuff under his breath after he passes me. So I cornered him and I say what are you saying under your breath and he says don't worry about it laughing. So yesterday he comes in at the end of the day and we are talking and he is acting strange talking about random things like death a subject he normally stays away from. We also talked about him being passive aggressive and he said he would try to be more cheerful and not be passive aggressive. So sensing that he may need to talk after he made a point to tell me he was just going to sit at home and do nothing that night (as if he was bummed about it) I non-chalanly say let's go out and do karaoke or something and he changes the subject then leaves.

So I tell myself OK let's try this one last time try to ask him to hang out somewhere to see how he reacts. An hour later after I sent a text saying

"But no seriously what are you doing tonight? Let's go get a drink. Drinks on me. I won't make you do karaoke lol"

He replied: "Hey I just got home I would love to just not tonight I'm in a funk extra tired And yes no karaoke."

He use the same excuse he always uses. So I ignored him didn't even write back. He always seems to have time for everybody else but me.

So I was resigned to just let him go and work with him until I find another job. I was to show no emotion about the whole thing today. However, he comes in at the end of the day And says did you go out to karaoke. I look at him and all of my anger returns and I robotically say "No, no I did not. " I walked away and when I come back he had left my desk. He proceeded to walk by 3 times as I ignored him and worked on my time sheet (which I hate doing so you know I was pissed if I'd rather do my time sheet than talk to him).

One time he walked by, he pretended to trip up the stairs and made a big commotion about it limping past my desk to see if I would respond to it and ask if he was OK, I did not ask.

Then when I got up to ask people if they needed help I came back to my desk and my phone had a sticky note on it facedown I picked it up and there was a heart on the sticky note.

I am so mad ?. For someone who doesn't want shit to do with me, who doesn't make me a priority, you want to leave hearts on my phone? If he doesn't like me in that way why is he sending me mixed signals like that!

Is he fucking with my head?

I'm not sure what to do I haven't called him because I'm afraid I'll cuss him out. I could go in tomorrow and treat him like we are just co workers and not friends but I tired that today and failed.

Sigh I need wine for whine tonight. Bottoms up ?.


At this point, I'd ask what the heart note business is about. You don't have anything to lose. Just say, 'hey did you see who left this on my phone?'
lol isnt that postit heart cute, OP IS A COLD MONSTER
Lmao How am I a cold monster? All I have done is been there for his ass and that was the other thing I was upset yesterday as well and he knew that Talking about "cheer up buttercup." Why should I always be there for him if he's not always there for me?


sry i didnt mean it, i was just trying to flirt with konichua
See!! That's that indirect shit we talking about!! Lmao
what do you mean ? you think i should ask directly to koniucha, if i can spend the night with her ?

click to expand


Lmao no I'm saying there is no way that look like a flirt. I think Cap men must think blinking at you is flirting too hahaha
Profile picture of ladylibra21
ladylibra21
@ladylibra21
10 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 9 · Posts: 3024 · Topics: 377
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by Koniuchaa
Posted by ladylibra21
First off let me say this is mostly venting.

So...I told myself New Year's Eve that if I didn't get some kind of contact saying happy new year from this guy then I was done. Because in my head if I mean something to you common sense would say you would wish me a happy new year. So he didn't so I started on my journey of letting go on New Year's Day. I get back to work and this dude is all in my face like constantly in my face like more than he normally is. I'm not paying him much attention because my new resolve is to move past this until I'm able to become friends with him. Near the end of the day he starts whispering stuff under his breath after he passes me. So I cornered him and I say what are you saying under your breath and he says don't worry about it laughing. So yesterday he comes in at the end of the day and we are talking and he is acting strange talking about random things like death a subject he normally stays away from. We also talked about him being passive aggressive and he said he would try to be more cheerful and not be passive aggressive. So sensing that he may need to talk after he made a point to tell me he was just going to sit at home and do nothing that night (as if he was bummed about it) I non-chalanly say let's go out and do karaoke or something and he changes the subject then leaves.

So I tell myself OK let's try this one last time try to ask him to hang out somewhere to see how he reacts. An hour later after I sent a text saying

"But no seriously what are you doing tonight? Let's go get a drink. Drinks on me. I won't make you do karaoke lol"

He replied: "Hey I just got home I would love to just not tonight I'm in a funk extra tired And yes no karaoke."

He use the same excuse he always uses. So I ignored him didn't even write back. He always seems to have time for everybody else but me.

So I was resigned to just let him go and work with him until I find another job. I was to show no emotion about the whole thing today. However, he comes in at the end of the day And says did you go out to karaoke. I look at him and all of my anger returns and I robotically say "No, no I did not. " I walked away and when I come back he had left my desk. He proceeded to walk by 3 times as I ignored him and worked on my time sheet (which I hate doing so you know I was pissed if I'd rather do my time sheet than talk to him).

One time he walked by, he pretended to trip up the stairs and made a big commotion about it limping past my desk to see if I would respond to it and ask if he was OK, I did not ask.

Then when I got up to ask people if they needed help I came back to my desk and my phone had a sticky note on it facedown I picked it up and there was a heart on the sticky note.

I am so mad ?. For someone who doesn't want shit to do with me, who doesn't make me a priority, you want to leave hearts on my phone? If he doesn't like me in that way why is he sending me mixed signals like that!

Is he fucking with my head?

I'm not sure what to do I haven't called him because I'm afraid I'll cuss him out. I could go in tomorrow and treat him like we are just co workers and not friends but I tired that today and failed.

Sigh I need wine for whine tonight. Bottoms up ?.


At this point, I'd ask what the heart note business is about. You don't have anything to lose. Just say, 'hey did you see who left this on my phone?'
lol isnt that postit heart cute, OP IS A COLD MONSTER
Lmao How am I a cold monster? All I have done is been there for his ass and that was the other thing I was upset yesterday as well and he knew that Talking about "cheer up buttercup." Why should I always be there for him if he's not always there for me?


sry i didnt mean it, i was just trying to flirt with konichua
See!! That's that indirect shit we talking about!! Lmao
what do you mean ? you think i should ask directly to koniucha, if i can spend the night with her ?



Lmao no I'm saying there is no way that look like a flirt. I think Cap men must think blinking at you is flirting too hahaha



Only if he's blushing while blinking



she don't understand.

6 Month for the first kiss minimum. but if you respect this rule a solid mariage will happen

click to expand


Well hell it has been a year! I should be talking to him while he is taking a shit by now!
Profile picture of ladylibra21
ladylibra21
@ladylibra21
10 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 9 · Posts: 3024 · Topics: 377
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by Koniuchaa
Posted by ladylibra21
First off let me say this is mostly venting.

So...I told myself New Year's Eve that if I didn't get some kind of contact saying happy new year from this guy then I was done. Because in my head if I mean something to you common sense would say you would wish me a happy new year. So he didn't so I started on my journey of letting go on New Year's Day. I get back to work and this dude is all in my face like constantly in my face like more than he normally is. I'm not paying him much attention because my new resolve is to move past this until I'm able to become friends with him. Near the end of the day he starts whispering stuff under his breath after he passes me. So I cornered him and I say what are you saying under your breath and he says don't worry about it laughing. So yesterday he comes in at the end of the day and we are talking and he is acting strange talking about random things like death a subject he normally stays away from. We also talked about him being passive aggressive and he said he would try to be more cheerful and not be passive aggressive. So sensing that he may need to talk after he made a point to tell me he was just going to sit at home and do nothing that night (as if he was bummed about it) I non-chalanly say let's go out and do karaoke or something and he changes the subject then leaves.

So I tell myself OK let's try this one last time try to ask him to hang out somewhere to see how he reacts. An hour later after I sent a text saying

"But no seriously what are you doing tonight? Let's go get a drink. Drinks on me. I won't make you do karaoke lol"

He replied: "Hey I just got home I would love to just not tonight I'm in a funk extra tired And yes no karaoke."

He use the same excuse he always uses. So I ignored him didn't even write back. He always seems to have time for everybody else but me.

So I was resigned to just let him go and work with him until I find another job. I was to show no emotion about the whole thing today. However, he comes in at the end of the day And says did you go out to karaoke. I look at him and all of my anger returns and I robotically say "No, no I did not. " I walked away and when I come back he had left my desk. He proceeded to walk by 3 times as I ignored him and worked on my time sheet (which I hate doing so you know I was pissed if I'd rather do my time sheet than talk to him).

One time he walked by, he pretended to trip up the stairs and made a big commotion about it limping past my desk to see if I would respond to it and ask if he was OK, I did not ask.

Then when I got up to ask people if they needed help I came back to my desk and my phone had a sticky note on it facedown I picked it up and there was a heart on the sticky note.

I am so mad ?. For someone who doesn't want shit to do with me, who doesn't make me a priority, you want to leave hearts on my phone? If he doesn't like me in that way why is he sending me mixed signals like that!

Is he fucking with my head?

I'm not sure what to do I haven't called him because I'm afraid I'll cuss him out. I could go in tomorrow and treat him like we are just co workers and not friends but I tired that today and failed.

Sigh I need wine for whine tonight. Bottoms up ?.


At this point, I'd ask what the heart note business is about. You don't have anything to lose. Just say, 'hey did you see who left this on my phone?'
lol isnt that postit heart cute, OP IS A COLD MONSTER
Lmao How am I a cold monster? All I have done is been there for his ass and that was the other thing I was upset yesterday as well and he knew that Talking about "cheer up buttercup." Why should I always be there for him if he's not always there for me?


sry i didnt mean it, i was just trying to flirt with konichua
See!! That's that indirect shit we talking about!! Lmao
what do you mean ? you think i should ask directly to koniucha, if i can spend the night with her ?



Lmao no I'm saying there is no way that look like a flirt. I think Cap men must think blinking at you is flirting too hahaha


do you think she'll accept ?
click to expand

She is a very coy girl in that regard not one over easily

Profile picture of ladylibra21
ladylibra21
@ladylibra21
10 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 9 · Posts: 3024 · Topics: 377
Posted by daron76
Lawd....



Soo maybe its time to call him on his BS? I've been called on mine before. I was young (26). I didn't recognize this woman was interested in me and I thought we were just having a good time . We had been flirting for a while (she was a Leo) according to her- I thought we had just been joking around. One day we were leaving a fundraiser (so we had been drinking a little bit) while we were waiting for her cab she turned to me and said " So am I getting dick tonight or what?" It took that for me to realize what was going on her end. We spent the next 10 yrs as on and off sexual partners and good friends. So, while her method may not be a great for a "relationship" it did work to "get an itch scratched" 😛 .

Not that you should have to put your self out there like that. I'm just sayin...

But, again.... ol boy... smh "utters under breath... this MF right here"
At this point but it is eczema infected by poison oak ! If we continue on like this my heart and my vagina are going to rot away. I'm not sure how to approach tomorrow or if I should even bring it up?
Profile picture of daron76
daron76
@daron76
9 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 3 · Posts: 621 · Topics: 14
How does one get a Cap to commit?

Hmmmm.. short answer?!?!? You don't.

Long answer; Right time, right frame of mind. When we are confident in ourselves (and dealt with our own baggage), got our selves on the the right track (or what we think is the right track) and happen to have decided to make building a relationship/ family a goal, then we will. Before that, I dunno, dumb luck—

No woman has ever "got me to commit". Its always been a choice I have made.
Profile picture of pinkbird03
Pink Bird
@pinkbird03
9 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 975 · Posts: 5791 · Topics: 44
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by daron76
Lawd....



Soo maybe its time to call him on his BS? I've been called on mine before. I was young (26). I didn't recognize this woman was interested in me and I thought we were just having a good time . We had been flirting for a while (she was a Leo) according to her- I thought we had just been joking around. One day we were leaving a fundraiser (so we had been drinking a little bit) while we were waiting for her cab she turned to me and said " So am I getting dick tonight or what?" It took that for me to realize what was going on her end. We spent the next 10 yrs as on and off sexual partners and good friends. So, while her method may not be a great for a "relationship" it did work to "get an itch scratched" 😛 .

Not that you should have to put your self out there like that. I'm just sayin...

But, again.... ol boy... smh "utters under breath... this MF right here"

But what does it take to get a cap to commit?

I'm not even sure how to answer that question from my perspective...

Either I like him enough to be willing to or I don't. It's not so much what the other person does or doesn't do, it's moreso my level of attraction to the person.

@pinkbird03 be attentive is the best I could come up with.

click to expand

It's hard when we only text. I just don't understand how we can talk everyday and build a friendship, but he doesn't want to hang out or date again. He doesn't want to date anyone right now is what he told me. But he lives right down the road. I drive by his house to go to the stores every week. It's just a very different relationship for me. I do feel like ladylibra also deals with the same exact type of relationship. It's not moving.
Profile picture of daron76
daron76
@daron76
9 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 3 · Posts: 621 · Topics: 14
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by daron76
Lawd....



Soo maybe its time to call him on his BS? I've been called on mine before. I was young (26). I didn't recognize this woman was interested in me and I thought we were just having a good time . We had been flirting for a while (she was a Leo) according to her- I thought we had just been joking around. One day we were leaving a fundraiser (so we had been drinking a little bit) while we were waiting for her cab she turned to me and said " So am I getting dick tonight or what?" It took that for me to realize what was going on her end. We spent the next 10 yrs as on and off sexual partners and good friends. So, while her method may not be a great for a "relationship" it did work to "get an itch scratched" 😛 .

Not that you should have to put your self out there like that. I'm just sayin...

But, again.... ol boy... smh "utters under breath... this MF right here"
At this point but it is eczema infected by poison oak ! If we continue on like this my heart and my vagina are going to rot away. I'm not sure how to approach tomorrow or if I should even bring it up?

click to expand

Depends what you want and/ or are comfortable with tbh. You are well with in your rights to let this horse die of thirst. You led him to water....
Profile picture of pinkbird03
Pink Bird
@pinkbird03
9 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 975 · Posts: 5791 · Topics: 44
Posted by daron76
How does one get a Cap to commit?

Hmmmm.. short answer?!?!? You don't.

Long answer; Right time, right frame of mind. When we are confident in ourselves (and dealt with our own baggage), got our selves on the the right track (or what we think is the right track) and happen to have decided to make building a relationship/ family a goal, then we will. Before that, I dunno, dumb luck—

No woman has ever "got me to commit". Its always been a choice I have made.
Thanks for answering =)
Profile picture of pinkbird03
Pink Bird
@pinkbird03
9 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 975 · Posts: 5791 · Topics: 44
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by pinkbird03
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by daron76
Lawd....



Soo maybe its time to call him on his BS? I've been called on mine before. I was young (26). I didn't recognize this woman was interested in me and I thought we were just having a good time . We had been flirting for a while (she was a Leo) according to her- I thought we had just been joking around. One day we were leaving a fundraiser (so we had been drinking a little bit) while we were waiting for her cab she turned to me and said " So am I getting dick tonight or what?" It took that for me to realize what was going on her end. We spent the next 10 yrs as on and off sexual partners and good friends. So, while her method may not be a great for a "relationship" it did work to "get an itch scratched" 😛 .

Not that you should have to put your self out there like that. I'm just sayin...

But, again.... ol boy... smh "utters under breath... this MF right here"

But what does it take to get a cap to commit?

I'm not even sure how to answer that question from my perspective...

Either I like him enough to be willing to or I don't. It's not so much what the other person does or doesn't do, it's moreso my level of attraction to the person.

@pinkbird03 be attentive is the best I could come up with.


It's hard when we only text. I just don't understand how we can talk everyday and build a friendship, but he doesn't want to hang out or date again. He doesn't want to date anyone right now is what he told me. But he lives right down the road. I drive by his house to go to the stores every week. It's just a very different relationship for me. I do feel like ladylibra also deals with the same exact type of relationship. It's not moving.



I have to be completely honest with you and I'm not trying to be harsh in any way.

I say that when either I'm going through something and haven't fully sorted myself or when I'm not interested or there are circumstances preventing me from wanting to commit.

So I believe it's best for you to move on confidently and close that chapter for good. Drop any & all feelings for him & if you so choose to revisit the friendship at that time do so, if not live a happy life without him. It's his loss...

I'm afraid it will never be anything more than what it is right now.

click to expand

It's not that easy. There's some strange connection that keeps us in each other's life. It's comforting for both of us, I believe. I've pretty much accepted the relationship for what it is. I don't have any expectations. I'd rather have this than not talking because I tried that and it only made me desire him even more. I can't help having feelings for him and that's not going to change right now.

At the same time, I'm on a few dating sites talking to a lot of guys. Trying to find someone I like! I was talking to one guy that works for the company that owns my apartment complex. I met him twice and he's so dreamy! I want his number! I also bought a new dress and heels for tomorrow night! ?
Profile picture of Aerazo
Aerazo
@Aerazo
8 Years1,000+ PostsAquarius

Comments: 9 · Posts: 2257 · Topics: 92
Posted by ladylibra21
@Aerazo he went to a party at a house with 3 couples. We have people who are married at our job in the handbook strictly says that our job does not monitor personal relationships.


Hmmm, but how long have you been "talking(kiss and sex?)" have you asked him if he just wants to be fwb ? Have you been around his friends before ? I'm not saying he should have taken you, it all depends on what stage are you guys at. I know a friend who takes different girls to his house for dinner with parents and thanksgiving. I feel like events like that should be separate unless you already introduced them to the family.
Profile picture of SunMoonStars
SagiSun, AquaRising, LeoMoon, LibraMars+Venus
@SunMoonStars
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 1 · Posts: 1685 · Topics: 200
Posted by daron76
Lawd....



Soo maybe its time to call him on his BS? I've been called on mine before. I was young (26). I didn't recognize this woman was interested in me and I thought we were just having a good time . We had been flirting for a while (she was a Leo) according to her- I thought we had just been joking around. One day we were leaving a fundraiser (so we had been drinking a little bit) while we were waiting for her cab she turned to me and said " So am I getting dick tonight or what?" It took that for me to realize what was going on her end. We spent the next 10 yrs as on and off sexual partners and good friends. So, while her method may not be a great for a "relationship" it did work to "get an itch scratched" 😛 .

Not that you should have to put your self out there like that. I'm just sayin...

But, again.... ol boy... smh "utters under breath... this MF right here"
OMG, this sounds like my Cap's story with his ex Leo.

She pursued him and literally had to trick him into coming over and staying the night. They hung out for a while and one day she said "am I your gf or what??". She was never his type and obviously it didn't work out. They spent 8.5 years together.

Personally, I think pursuing a Cap who isn't that into you is hard and losing battle.

Profile picture of SunMoonStars
SagiSun, AquaRising, LeoMoon, LibraMars+Venus
@SunMoonStars
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 1 · Posts: 1685 · Topics: 200
Posted by daron76
How does one get a Cap to commit?

Hmmmm.. short answer?!?!? You don't.

Long answer; Right time, right frame of mind. When we are confident in ourselves (and dealt with our own baggage), got our selves on the the right track (or what we think is the right track) and happen to have decided to make building a relationship/ family a goal, then we will. Before that, I dunno, dumb luck—

No woman has ever "got me to commit". Its always been a choice I have made.
Amen. Absolutely.

I think a Cap has to really love you to commit for good.

I can see a Cap committing to someone who could provide them with things, resources, money, opportunities etc. However, if he's not into you, he's not into you! It won't end well.
Profile picture of InLoveWithLife
InLoveWithLife
@InLoveWithLife
9 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 0 · Posts: 561 · Topics: 16
Posted by ladylibra21
First off let me say this is mostly venting.

So...I told myself New Year's Eve that if I didn't get some kind of contact saying happy new year from this guy then I was done. Because in my head if I mean something to you common sense would say you would wish me a happy new year. So he didn't so I started on my journey of letting go on New Year's Day. I get back to work and this dude is all in my face like constantly in my face like more than he normally is. I'm not paying him much attention because my new resolve is to move past this until I'm able to become friends with him. Near the end of the day he starts whispering stuff under his breath after he passes me. So I cornered him and I say what are you saying under your breath and he says don't worry about it laughing. So yesterday he comes in at the end of the day and we are talking and he is acting strange talking about random things like death a subject he normally stays away from. We also talked about him being passive aggressive and he said he would try to be more cheerful and not be passive aggressive. So sensing that he may need to talk after he made a point to tell me he was just going to sit at home and do nothing that night (as if he was bummed about it) I non-chalanly say let's go out and do karaoke or something and he changes the subject then leaves.

So I tell myself OK let's try this one last time try to ask him to hang out somewhere to see how he reacts. An hour later after I sent a text saying

"But no seriously what are you doing tonight? Let's go get a drink. Drinks on me. I won't make you do karaoke lol"

He replied: "Hey I just got home I would love to just not tonight I'm in a funk extra tired And yes no karaoke."

He use the same excuse he always uses. So I ignored him didn't even write back. He always seems to have time for everybody else but me.

So I was resigned to just let him go and work with him until I find another job. I was to show no emotion about the whole thing today. However, he comes in at the end of the day And says did you go out to karaoke. I look at him and all of my anger returns and I robotically say "No, no I did not. " I walked away and when I come back he had left my desk. He proceeded to walk by 3 times as I ignored him and worked on my time sheet (which I hate doing so you know I was pissed if I'd rather do my time sheet than talk to him).

One time he walked by, he pretended to trip up the stairs and made a big commotion about it limping past my desk to see if I would respond to it and ask if he was OK, I did not ask.

Then when I got up to ask people if they needed help I came back to my desk and my phone had a sticky note on it facedown I picked it up and there was a heart on the sticky note.

I am so mad ?. For someone who doesn't want shit to do with me, who doesn't make me a priority, you want to leave hearts on my phone? If he doesn't like me in that way why is he sending me mixed signals like that!

Is he fucking with my head?

I'm not sure what to do I haven't called him because I'm afraid I'll cuss him out. I could go in tomorrow and treat him like we are just co workers and not friends but I tired that today and failed.

Sigh I need wine for whine tonight. Bottoms up ?.



I went through the yes - no - yes - no, " not now", and hot and cold behavior, silent treatment, passive aggressiveness and all that for a year! I know how super annoying it can be. You a Libra? I'm a Leo. Even if my Case was entirely different (at the end I came to know that he was cheating on me), the annoyance levels are the same, I suppose.

Every time I'd resolve to totally move away, he'd be back! And he'd start repeating his annoying acts again! Don't waste time, dear. Just leave. They just won't or Can't change! One whole year of the same excuse! "I Want to see You, but not now, I Can't. I'm busy."
Profile picture of SunMoonStars
SagiSun, AquaRising, LeoMoon, LibraMars+Venus
@SunMoonStars
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 1 · Posts: 1685 · Topics: 200
Posted by ladylibra21
First off let me say this is mostly venting.

So...I told myself New Year's Eve that if I didn't get some kind of contact saying happy new year from this guy then I was done. Because in my head if I mean something to you common sense would say you would wish me a happy new year. So he didn't so I started on my journey of letting go on New Year's Day. I get back to work and this dude is all in my face like constantly in my face like more than he normally is. I'm not paying him much attention because my new resolve is to move past this until I'm able to become friends with him. Near the end of the day he starts whispering stuff under his breath after he passes me. So I cornered him and I say what are you saying under your breath and he says don't worry about it laughing. So yesterday he comes in at the end of the day and we are talking and he is acting strange talking about random things like death a subject he normally stays away from. We also talked about him being passive aggressive and he said he would try to be more cheerful and not be passive aggressive. So sensing that he may need to talk after he made a point to tell me he was just going to sit at home and do nothing that night (as if he was bummed about it) I non-chalanly say let's go out and do karaoke or something and he changes the subject then leaves.

So I tell myself OK let's try this one last time try to ask him to hang out somewhere to see how he reacts. An hour later after I sent a text saying

"But no seriously what are you doing tonight? Let's go get a drink. Drinks on me. I won't make you do karaoke lol"

He replied: "Hey I just got home I would love to just not tonight I'm in a funk extra tired And yes no karaoke."

He use the same excuse he always uses. So I ignored him didn't even write back. He always seems to have time for everybody else but me.

So I was resigned to just let him go and work with him until I find another job. I was to show no emotion about the whole thing today. However, he comes in at the end of the day And says did you go out to karaoke. I look at him and all of my anger returns and I robotically say "No, no I did not. " I walked away and when I come back he had left my desk. He proceeded to walk by 3 times as I ignored him and worked on my time sheet (which I hate doing so you know I was pissed if I'd rather do my time sheet than talk to him).

One time he walked by, he pretended to trip up the stairs and made a big commotion about it limping past my desk to see if I would respond to it and ask if he was OK, I did not ask.

Then when I got up to ask people if they needed help I came back to my desk and my phone had a sticky note on it facedown I picked it up and there was a heart on the sticky note.

I am so mad ?. For someone who doesn't want shit to do with me, who doesn't make me a priority, you want to leave hearts on my phone? If he doesn't like me in that way why is he sending me mixed signals like that!

Is he fucking with my head?

I'm not sure what to do I haven't called him because I'm afraid I'll cuss him out. I could go in tomorrow and treat him like we are just co workers and not friends but I tired that today and failed.

Sigh I need wine for whine tonight. Bottoms up ?.


Welcome to the roller coaster of dating a Cap.

Things will be on his timeline, and he will reveal what he wants when he wants.
Profile picture of Aerazo
Aerazo
@Aerazo
8 Years1,000+ PostsAquarius

Comments: 9 · Posts: 2257 · Topics: 92
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by Koniuchaa
Posted by ladylibra21
First off let me say this is mostly venting.

So...I told myself New Year's Eve that if I didn't get some kind of contact saying happy new year from this guy then I was done. Because in my head if I mean something to you common sense would say you would wish me a happy new year. So he didn't so I started on my journey of letting go on New Year's Day. I get back to work and this dude is all in my face like 3constantly in my face like more than he normally is. I'm not paying him much attention because my new resolve is to move past this until I'm able to become friends with him. Near the end of the day he starts whispering stuff under his breath after he passes me. So I cornered him and I say what are you saying under your breath and he says don't worry about it laughing. So yesterday he comes in at the end of the day and we are talking and he is acting strange talking about random things like death a subject he normally stays away from. We also talked about him being passive aggressive and he said he would try to be more cheerful and not be passive aggressive. So sensing that he may need to talk after he made a point to tell me he was just going to sit at home and do nothing that night (as if he was bummed about it) I non-chalanly say let's go out and do karaoke or something and he changes the subject then leaves.

So I tell myself OK let's try this one last time try to ask him to hang out somewhere to see how he reacts. An hour later after I sent a text saying

"But no seriously what are you doing tonight? Let's go get a drink. Drinks on me. I won't make you do karaoke lol"

He replied: "Hey I just got home I would love to just not tonight I'm in a funk extra tired And yes no karaoke."

He use the same excuse he always uses. So I ignored him didn't even write back. He always seems to have time for everybody else but me.

So I was resigned to just let him go and work with him until I find another job. I was to show no emotion about the whole thing today. However, he comes in at the end of the day And says did you go out to karaoke. I look at him and all of my anger returns and I robotically say "No, no I did not. " I walked away and when I come back he had left my desk. He proceeded to walk by 3 times as I ignored him and worked on my time sheet (which I hate doing so you know I was pissed if I'd rather do my time sheet than talk to him).

One time he walked by, he pretended to trip up the stairs and made a big commotion about it limping past my desk to see if I would respond to it and ask if he was OK, I did not ask.

Then when I got up to ask people if they needed help I came back to my desk and my phone had a sticky note on it facedown I picked it up and there was a heart on the sticky note.

I am so mad ?. For someone who doesn't want shit to do with me, who doesn't make me a priority, you want to leave hearts on my phone? If he doesn't like me in that way why is he sending me mixed signals like that!

Is he fucking with my head?

I'm not sure what to do I haven't called him because I'm afraid I'll cuss him out. I could go in tomorrow and treat him like we are just co workers and not friends but I tired that today and failed.

Sigh I need wine for whine tonight. Bottoms up ?.


At this point, I'd ask what the heart note business is about. You don't have anything to lose. Just say, 'hey did you see who left this on my phone?'
lol isnt that postit heart cute, OP IS A COLD MONSTER
Lmao How am I a cold monster? All I have done is been there for his ass and that was the other thing I was upset yesterday as well and he knew that Talking about "cheer up buttercup." Why should I always be there for him if he's not always there for me?


sry i didnt mean it, i was just trying to flirt with konichua
See!! That's that indirect shit we talking about!! Lmao
what do you mean ? you think i should ask directly to koniucha, if i can spend the night with her ?



Lmao no I'm saying there is no way that look like a flirt. I think Cap men must think blinking at you is flirting too hahaha



Only if he's blushing while blinking

click to expand

Awww haha this was cute. My Cap does blush and blinks when he sees me and has a big smile ?
Profile picture of Aerazo
Aerazo
@Aerazo
8 Years1,000+ PostsAquarius

Comments: 9 · Posts: 2257 · Topics: 92
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by Koniuchaa
Posted by ladylibra21
First off let me say this is mostly venting.

So...I told myself New Year's Eve that if I didn't get some kind of contact saying happy new year from this guy then I was done. Because in my head if I mean something to you common sense would say you would wish me a happy new year. So he didn't so I started on my journey of letting go on New Year's Day. I get back to work and this dude is all in my face like constantly in my face like more than he normally is. I'm not paying him much attention because my new resolve is to move past this until I'm able to become friends with him. Near the end of the day he starts whispering stuff under his breath after he passes me. So I cornered him and I say what are you saying under your breath and he says don't worry about it laughing. So yesterday he comes in at the end of the day and we are talking and he is acting strange talking about random things like death a subject he normally stays away from. We also talked about him being passive aggressive and he said he would try to be more cheerful and not be passive aggressive. So sensing that he may need to talk after he made a point to tell me he was just going to sit at home and do nothing that night (as if he was bummed about it) I non-chalanly say let's go out and do karaoke or something and he changes the subject then leaves.

So I tell myself OK let's try this one last time try to ask him to hang out somewhere to see how he reacts. An hour later after I sent a text saying

"But no seriously what are you doing tonight? Let's go get a drink. Drinks on me. I won't make you do karaoke lol"

He replied: "Hey I just got home I would love to just not tonight I'm in a funk extra tired And yes no karaoke."

He use the same excuse he always uses. So I ignored him didn't even write back. He always seems to have time for everybody else but me.

So I was resigned to just let him go and work with him until I find another job. I was to show no emotion about the whole thing today. However, he comes in at the end of the day And says did you go out to karaoke. I look at him and all of my anger returns and I robotically say "No, no I did not. " I walked away and when I come back he had left my desk. He proceeded to walk by 3 times as I ignored him and worked on my time sheet (which I hate doing so you know I was pissed if I'd rather do my time sheet than talk to him).

One time he walked by, he pretended to trip up the stairs and made a big commotion about it limping past my desk to see if I would respond to it and ask if he was OK, I did not ask.

Then when I got up to ask people if they needed help I came back to my desk and my phone had a sticky note on it facedown I picked it up and there was a heart on the sticky note.

I am so mad ?. For someone who doesn't want shit to do with me, who doesn't make me a priority, you want to leave hearts on my phone? If he doesn't like me in that way why is he sending me mixed signals like that!

Is he fucking with my head?

I'm not sure what to do I haven't called him because I'm afraid I'll cuss him out. I could go in tomorrow and treat him like we are just co workers and not friends but I tired that today and failed.

Sigh I need wine for whine tonight. Bottoms up ?.


At this point, I'd ask what the heart note business is about. You don't have anything to lose. Just say, 'hey did you see who left this on my phone?'
lol isnt that postit heart cute, OP IS A COLD MONSTER
Lmao How am I a cold monster? All I have done is been there for his ass and that was the other thing I was upset yesterday as well and he knew that Talking about "cheer up buttercup." Why should I always be there for him if he's not always there for me?


sry i didnt mean it, i was just trying to flirt with konichua
See!! That's that indirect shit we talking about!! Lmao
what do you mean ? you think i should ask directly to koniucha, if i can spend the night with her ?



Lmao no I'm saying there is no way that look like a flirt. I think Cap men must think blinking at you is flirting too hahaha



Only if he's blushing while blinking



she don't understand.

6 Month for the first kiss minimum. but if you respect this rule a solid mariage will happen

click to expand



6 months for first kiss—— what?

Id die longing to eat him for that long and not being able to taste him ?

I haven't even kissed him in the last month and half ?
Profile picture of Aerazo
Aerazo
@Aerazo
8 Years1,000+ PostsAquarius

Comments: 9 · Posts: 2257 · Topics: 92
Posted by daron76
How does one get a Cap to commit?

Hmmmm.. short answer?!?!? You don't.

Long answer; Right time, right frame of mind. When we are confident in ourselves (and dealt with our own baggage), got our selves on the the right track (or what we think is the right track) and happen to have decided to make building a relationship/ family a goal, then we will. Before that, I dunno, dumb luck—

No woman has ever "got me to commit". Its always been a choice I have made.
I'm glad to read this... gives me hope, at least I hope my Cap is moving things around for me and not another one haha

How do we know if we are the only one a Cap has?

Not in a bf/gf relationship but in a "Idk what we are" relationship. Sometimes my Cap is so distant that it makes me think that he is seeing someone else.
Profile picture of Aerazo
Aerazo
@Aerazo
8 Years1,000+ PostsAquarius

Comments: 9 · Posts: 2257 · Topics: 92
Posted by pinkbird03
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by pinkbird03
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by daron76
Lawd....



Soo maybe its time to call him on his BS? I've been called on mine before. I was young (26). I didn't recognize this woman was interested in me and I thought we were just having a good time . We had been flirting for a while (she was a Leo) according to her- I thought we had just been joking around. One day we were leaving a fundraiser (so we had been drinking a little bit) while we were waiting for her cab she turned to me and said " So am I getting dick tonight or what?" It took that for me to realize what was going on her end. We spent the next 10 yrs as on and off sexual partners and good friends. So, while her method may not be a great for a "relationship" it did work to "get an itch scratched" 😛 .

Not that you should have to put your self out there like that. I'm just sayin...

But, again.... ol boy... smh "utters under breath... this MF right here"

But what does it take to get a cap to commit?

I'm not even sure how to answer that question from my perspective...

Either I like him enough to be willing to or I don't. It's not so much what the other person does or doesn't do, it's moreso my level of attraction to the person.

@pinkbird03 be attentive is the best I could come up with.


It's hard when we only text. I just don't understand how we can talk everyday and build a friendship, but he doesn't want to hang out or date again. He doesn't want to date anyone right now is what he told me. But he lives right down the road. I drive by his house to go to the stores every week. It's just a very different relationship for me. I do feel like ladylibra also deals with the same exact type of relationship. It's not moving.



I have to be completely honest with you and I'm not trying to be harsh in any way.

I say that when either I'm going through something and haven't fully sorted myself or when I'm not interested or there are circumstances preventing me from wanting to commit.

So I believe it's best for you to move on confidently and close that chapter for good. Drop any & all feelings for him & if you so choose to revisit the friendship at that time do so, if not live a happy life without him. It's his loss...

I'm afraid it will never be anything more than what it is right now.


It's not that easy. There's some strange connection that keeps us in each other's life. It's comforting for both of us, I believe. I've pretty much accepted the relationship for what it is. I don't have any expectations. I'd rather have this than not talking because I tried that and it only made me desire him even more. I can't help having feelings for him and that's not going to change right now.

At the same time, I'm on a few dating sites talking to a lot of guys. Trying to find someone I like! I was talking to one guy that works for the company that owns my apartment complex. I met him twice and he's so dreamy! I want his number! I also bought a new dress and heels for tomorrow night! ?
click to expand

What's your sign?

Yes I feel the same with my Cap. that's why I'm wondering if they are the same way and if there is a way to make it easier or make sure we don't cross the line, my friend says that I treat him like if he's Glass. Careful not to say anything that would be overboard or sound psycho!

He told me his personality is complicated and most people understand him. I do feel like he appreciates that I'm still there for him when he wants to talk. but sometimes I give him space and sometimes I'm the one who goes away bc I need space from him.
Profile picture of SunMoonStars
SagiSun, AquaRising, LeoMoon, LibraMars+Venus
@SunMoonStars
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 1 · Posts: 1685 · Topics: 200
Posted by Aerazo
Posted by pinkbird03
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by pinkbird03
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by daron76
Lawd....



Soo maybe its time to call him on his BS? I've been called on mine before. I was young (26). I didn't recognize this woman was interested in me and I thought we were just having a good time . We had been flirting for a while (she was a Leo) according to her- I thought we had just been joking around. One day we were leaving a fundraiser (so we had been drinking a little bit) while we were waiting for her cab she turned to me and said " So am I getting dick tonight or what?" It took that for me to realize what was going on her end. We spent the next 10 yrs as on and off sexual partners and good friends. So, while her method may not be a great for a "relationship" it did work to "get an itch scratched" 😛 .

Not that you should have to put your self out there like that. I'm just sayin...

But, again.... ol boy... smh "utters under breath... this MF right here"

But what does it take to get a cap to commit?

I'm not even sure how to answer that question from my perspective...

Either I like him enough to be willing to or I don't. It's not so much what the other person does or doesn't do, it's moreso my level of attraction to the person.

@pinkbird03 be attentive is the best I could come up with.


It's hard when we only text. I just don't understand how we can talk everyday and build a friendship, but he doesn't want to hang out or date again. He doesn't want to date anyone right now is what he told me. But he lives right down the road. I drive by his house to go to the stores every week. It's just a very different relationship for me. I do feel like ladylibra also deals with the same exact type of relationship. It's not moving.



I have to be completely honest with you and I'm not trying to be harsh in any way.

I say that when either I'm going through something and haven't fully sorted myself or when I'm not interested or there are circumstances preventing me from wanting to commit.

So I believe it's best for you to move on confidently and close that chapter for good. Drop any & all feelings for him & if you so choose to revisit the friendship at that time do so, if not live a happy life without him. It's his loss...

I'm afraid it will never be anything more than what it is right now.


It's not that easy. There's some strange connection that keeps us in each other's life. It's comforting for both of us, I believe. I've pretty much accepted the relationship for what it is. I don't have any expectations. I'd rather have this than not talking because I tried that and it only made me desire him even more. I can't help having feelings for him and that's not going to change right now.

At the same time, I'm on a few dating sites talking to a lot of guys. Trying to find someone I like! I was talking to one guy that works for the company that owns my apartment complex. I met him twice and he's so dreamy! I want his number! I also bought a new dress and heels for tomorrow night! ?
What's your sign?

Yes I feel the same with my Cap. that's why I'm wondering if they are the same way and if there is a way to make it easier or make sure we don't cross the line, my friend says that I treat him like if he's Glass. Careful not to say anything that would be overboard or sound psycho!

He told me his personality is complicated and most people understand him. I do feel like he appreciates that I'm still there for him when he wants to talk. but sometimes I give him space and sometimes I'm the one who goes away bc I need space from him.

click to expand

Totally know how you feel. I often feel like I'm walking on eggshells with my Cap.

As I've said before, I think we gotta be more like an Earth sign when dealing with Caps...
Profile picture of ladylibra21
ladylibra21
@ladylibra21
10 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 9 · Posts: 3024 · Topics: 377
Posted by Aerazo
Posted by ladylibra21
@Aerazo he went to a party at a house with 3 couples. We have people who are married at our job in the handbook strictly says that our job does not monitor personal relationships.


Hmmm, but how long have you been "talking(kiss and sex?)" have you asked him if he just wants to be fwb ? Have you been around his friends before ? I'm not saying he should have taken you, it all depends on what stage are you guys at. I know a friend who takes different girls to his house for dinner with parents and thanksgiving. I feel like events like that should be separate unless you already introduced them to the family.
click to expand


No kissing or sex it has been a year we came close to it in Dec but nothing happened. He came to my show in October and brought 2 of his friends and then told other people to see it. He has met my family he went up and introduced himself to them at my show, but no I haven't met his family.

Profile picture of pinkbird03
Pink Bird
@pinkbird03
9 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 975 · Posts: 5791 · Topics: 44
Posted by SunMoonStars
Posted by Aerazo
Posted by pinkbird03
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by pinkbird03
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by daron76
Lawd....



Soo maybe its time to call him on his BS? I've been called on mine before. I was young (26). I didn't recognize this woman was interested in me and I thought we were just having a good time . We had been flirting for a while (she was a Leo) according to her- I thought we had just been joking around. One day we were leaving a fundraiser (so we had been drinking a little bit) while we were waiting for her cab she turned to me and said " So am I getting dick tonight or what?" It took that for me to realize what was going on her end. We spent the next 10 yrs as on and off sexual partners and good friends. So, while her method may not be a great for a "relationship" it did work to "get an itch scratched" 😛 .

Not that you should have to put your self out there like that. I'm just sayin...

But, again.... ol boy... smh "utters under breath... this MF right here"

But what does it take to get a cap to commit?

I'm not even sure how to answer that question from my perspective...

Either I like him enough to be willing to or I don't. It's not so much what the other person does or doesn't do, it's moreso my level of attraction to the person.

@pinkbird03 be attentive is the best I could come up with.


It's hard when we only text. I just don't understand how we can talk everyday and build a friendship, but he doesn't want to hang out or date again. He doesn't want to date anyone right now is what he told me. But he lives right down the road. I drive by his house to go to the stores every week. It's just a very different relationship for me. I do feel like ladylibra also deals with the same exact type of relationship. It's not moving.



I have to be completely honest with you and I'm not trying to be harsh in any way.

I say that when either I'm going through something and haven't fully sorted myself or when I'm not interested or there are circumstances preventing me from wanting to commit.

So I believe it's best for you to move on confidently and close that chapter for good. Drop any & all feelings for him & if you so choose to revisit the friendship at that time do so, if not live a happy life without him. It's his loss...

I'm afraid it will never be anything more than what it is right now.


It's not that easy. There's some strange connection that keeps us in each other's life. It's comforting for both of us, I believe. I've pretty much accepted the relationship for what it is. I don't have any expectations. I'd rather have this than not talking because I tried that and it only made me desire him even more. I can't help having feelings for him and that's not going to change right now.

At the same time, I'm on a few dating sites talking to a lot of guys. Trying to find someone I like! I was talking to one guy that works for the company that owns my apartment complex. I met him twice and he's so dreamy! I want his number! I also bought a new dress and heels for tomorrow night! ?
What's your sign?

Yes I feel the same with my Cap. that's why I'm wondering if they are the same way and if there is a way to make it easier or make sure we don't cross the line, my friend says that I treat him like if he's Glass. Careful not to say anything that would be overboard or sound psycho!

He told me his personality is complicated and most people understand him. I do feel like he appreciates that I'm still there for him when he wants to talk. but sometimes I give him space and sometimes I'm the one who goes away bc I need space from him.


Totally know how you feel. I often feel like I'm walking on eggshells with my Cap.

As I've said before, I think we gotta be more like an Earth sign when dealing with Caps...

click to expand

Wow, I can't believe so many girls are saying the exact same thing! Our relationships sound identical. It's comforting to know I'm not the only one.

@Aerazo I'm a cancer. For the longest time, I have been holding back and watching what I say. I've stopped doing that recently and he's noticed by saying something about it. I'll admit, it feels great to just be myself and not care if he likes it or not. You should try it!

What's everyone's sign here that's dating a cap?
Profile picture of pinkbird03
Pink Bird
@pinkbird03
9 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 975 · Posts: 5791 · Topics: 44
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by Aerazo
Posted by ladylibra21
@Aerazo he went to a party at a house with 3 couples. We have people who are married at our job in the handbook strictly says that our job does not monitor personal relationships.


Hmmm, but how long have you been "talking(kiss and sex?)" have you asked him if he just wants to be fwb ? Have you been around his friends before ? I'm not saying he should have taken you, it all depends on what stage are you guys at. I know a friend who takes different girls to his house for dinner with parents and thanksgiving. I feel like events like that should be separate unless you already introduced them to the family.

No kissing or sex it has been a year we came close to it in Dec but nothing happened. He came to my show in October and brought 2 of his friends and then told other people to see it. He has met my family he went up and introduced himself to them at my show, but no I haven't met his family.

click to expand

Omg why hasn't he kissed you yet— I definitely feel frustrated for you. At this point, I think you should just go for it and initiate it. Or if you don't want to do that, you can tell him you want to kiss him lol be aggressive. You got nothing to lose
Profile picture of kdee53
kdee53
@kdee53
9 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 15 · Topics: 3
Posted by Aerazo
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by ParisianCappy
Posted by Koniuchaa
Posted by ladylibra21
First off let me say this is mostly venting.

So...I told myself New Year's Eve that if I didn't get some kind of contact saying happy new year from this guy then I was done. Because in my head if I mean something to you common sense would say you would wish me a happy new year. So he didn't so I started on my journey of letting go on New Year's Day. I get back to work and this dude is all in my face like constantly in my face like more than he normally is. I'm not paying him much attention because my new resolve is to move past this until I'm able to become friends with him. Near the end of the day he starts whispering stuff under his breath after he passes me. So I cornered him and I say what are you saying under your breath and he says don't worry about it laughing. So yesterday he comes in at the end of the day and we are talking and he is acting strange talking about random things like death a subject he normally stays away from. We also talked about him being passive aggressive and he said he would try to be more cheerful and not be passive aggressive. So sensing that he may need to talk after he made a point to tell me he was just going to sit at home and do nothing that night (as if he was bummed about it) I non-chalanly say let's go out and do karaoke or something and he changes the subject then leaves.

So I tell myself OK let's try this one last time try to ask him to hang out somewhere to see how he reacts. An hour later after I sent a text saying

"But no seriously what are you doing tonight? Let's go get a drink. Drinks on me. I won't make you do karaoke lol"

He replied: "Hey I just got home I would love to just not tonight I'm in a funk extra tired And yes no karaoke."

He use the same excuse he always uses. So I ignored him didn't even write back. He always seems to have time for everybody else but me.

So I was resigned to just let him go and work with him until I find another job. I was to show no emotion about the whole thing today. However, he comes in at the end of the day And says did you go out to karaoke. I look at him and all of my anger returns and I robotically say "No, no I did not. " I walked away and when I come back he had left my desk. He proceeded to walk by 3 times as I ignored him and worked on my time sheet (which I hate doing so you know I was pissed if I'd rather do my time sheet than talk to him).

One time he walked by, he pretended to trip up the stairs and made a big commotion about it limping past my desk to see if I would respond to it and ask if he was OK, I did not ask.

Then when I got up to ask people if they needed help I came back to my desk and my phone had a sticky note on it facedown I picked it up and there was a heart on the sticky note.

I am so mad ?. For someone who doesn't want shit to do with me, who doesn't make me a priority, you want to leave hearts on my phone? If he doesn't like me in that way why is he sending me mixed signals like that!

Is he fucking with my head?

I'm not sure what to do I haven't called him because I'm afraid I'll cuss him out. I could go in tomorrow and treat him like we are just co workers and not friends but I tired that today and failed.

Sigh I need wine for whine tonight. Bottoms up ?.


At this point, I'd ask what the heart note business is about. You don't have anything to lose. Just say, 'hey did you see who left this on my phone?'
lol isnt that postit heart cute, OP IS A COLD MONSTER
Lmao How am I a cold monster? All I have done is been there for his ass and that was the other thing I was upset yesterday as well and he knew that Talking about "cheer up buttercup." Why should I always be there for him if he's not always there for me?


sry i didnt mean it, i was just trying to flirt with konichua
See!! That's that indirect shit we talking about!! Lmao
what do you mean ? you think i should ask directly to koniucha, if i can spend the night with her ?



Lmao no I'm saying there is no way that look like a flirt. I think Cap men must think blinking at you is flirting too hahaha



Only if he's blushing while blinking



she don't understand.

6 Month for the first kiss minimum. but if you respect this rule a solid mariage will happen




6 months for first kiss—— what?

Id die longing to eat him for that long and not being able to taste him ?

I haven't even kissed him in the last month and half ?

click to expand

I'm dying as we speak @Aerazo .. I haven't seen my cappy in a month! And I just want another date. It's funny that @ParisianCappy says 6months when after talking to mine for 3weeks, on our first date, he sorta made the first move to me. We were both feeling a little nice from drinking so much and he said if he drank one more drink, he would end up doing something crazy like kiss me. I said I wouldn't mind that and then he says; what am I waiting for? So then I moved myself closer to him and kissed him. So I can understand when someone on here said that sometimes the other person has to make the initiative. I normally prefer the guy to do it, I have never made the first move until I met this cap. The 2nd date, I made the move to kiss him, he obviously didn't complain. And now, we have gone almost 2 days without texting/talking. Really hoping it's not what I said in my last text. Would be weird for him to just disappear over a text. He still following me on social media so maybe just his normal routine of "unannounced space". 😢 I'll probably text him later or tomorrow to say hello since someone else on here said that we should be the ones to reach out.

Profile picture of kdee53
kdee53
@kdee53
9 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 15 · Topics: 3
Posted by pinkbird03
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by Aerazo
Posted by ladylibra21
@Aerazo he went to a party at a house with 3 couples. We have people who are married at our job in the handbook strictly says that our job does not monitor personal relationships.


Hmmm, but how long have you been "talking(kiss and sex?)" have you asked him if he just wants to be fwb ? Have you been around his friends before ? I'm not saying he should have taken you, it all depends on what stage are you guys at. I know a friend who takes different girls to his house for dinner with parents and thanksgiving. I feel like events like that should be separate unless you already introduced them to the family.

No kissing or sex it has been a year we came close to it in Dec but nothing happened. He came to my show in October and brought 2 of his friends and then told other people to see it. He has met my family he went up and introduced himself to them at my show, but no I haven't met his family.


Omg why hasn't he kissed you yet— I definitely feel frustrated for you. At this point, I think you should just go for it and initiate it. Or if you don't want to do that, you can tell him you want to kiss him lol be aggressive. You got nothing to lose
click to expand

I definitely agree with @pinkbird03 , go for it and make the move. The "what ifs" will haunt you! I have texted my cappy a while back when for the first time he opened up and he complimented on the things he liked about me, I said how sweet he was and that I wish I could kiss him. His response was to save it for the next time and he sent me a heart emoji. Oh cappy, why must you be so difficult to read 😢

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Aerazo
@Aerazo
8 Years1,000+ PostsAquarius

Comments: 9 · Posts: 2257 · Topics: 92
Posted by SunMoonStars
Posted by daron76
Lawd....



Soo maybe its time to call him on his BS? I've been called on mine before. I was young (26). I didn't recognize this woman was interested in me and I thought we were just having a good time . We had been flirting for a while (she was a Leo) according to her- I thought we had just been joking around. One day we were leaving a fundraiser (so we had been drinking a little bit) while we were waiting for her cab she turned to me and said " So am I getting dick tonight or what?" It took that for me to realize what was going on her end. We spent the next 10 yrs as on and off sexual partners and good friends. So, while her method may not be a great for a "relationship" it did work to "get an itch scratched" 😛 .

Not that you should have to put your self out there like that. I'm just sayin...

But, again.... ol boy... smh "utters under breath... this MF right here"
OMG, this sounds like my Cap's story with his ex Leo.

She pursued him and literally had to trick him into coming over and staying the night. They hung out for a while and one day she said "am I your gf or what??". She was never his type and obviously it didn't work out. They spent 8.5 years together.

Personally, I think pursuing a Cap who isn't that into you is hard and losing battle.

click to expand

Who would wait 8 years to ask that question—

I'd mostly wait 6 months, I'd he doesn't want me to be his girlfriend I might agree to be fwb but by then I'd already know what he wants.
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Aerazo
@Aerazo
8 Years1,000+ PostsAquarius

Comments: 9 · Posts: 2257 · Topics: 92
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by Aerazo
Posted by ladylibra21
@Aerazo he went to a party at a house with 3 couples. We have people who are married at our job in the handbook strictly says that our job does not monitor personal relationships.


Hmmm, but how long have you been "talking(kiss and sex?)" have you asked him if he just wants to be fwb ? Have you been around his friends before ? I'm not saying he should have taken you, it all depends on what stage are you guys at. I know a friend who takes different girls to his house for dinner with parents and thanksgiving. I feel like events like that should be separate unless you already introduced them to the family.

No kissing or sex it has been a year we came close to it in Dec but nothing happened. He came to my show in October and brought 2 of his friends and then told other people to see it. He has met my family he went up and introduced himself to them at my show, but no I haven't met his family.

click to expand

Hmm why do you like him so much to go through all the overtinking?

What do you see in him? or is it just an attraction?
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ladylibra21
@ladylibra21
10 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 9 · Posts: 3024 · Topics: 377
Posted by Aerazo
Posted by ladylibra21
Posted by Aerazo
Posted by ladylibra21
@Aerazo he went to a party at a house with 3 couples. We have people who are married at our job in the handbook strictly says that our job does not monitor personal relationships.


Hmmm, but how long have you been "talking(kiss and sex?)" have you asked him if he just wants to be fwb ? Have you been around his friends before ? I'm not saying he should have taken you, it all depends on what stage are you guys at. I know a friend who takes different girls to his house for dinner with parents and thanksgiving. I feel like events like that should be separate unless you already introduced them to the family.

No kissing or sex it has been a year we came close to it in Dec but nothing happened. He came to my show in October and brought 2 of his friends and then told other people to see it. He has met my family he went up and introduced himself to them at my show, but no I haven't met his family.


Hmm why do you like him so much to go through all the overtinking?

What do you see in him? or is it just an attraction?
click to expand

He gets me emotionally. He can always tell where I'm at in moods no matter how much I try to mask it. Conversation is easy when we are together we talk about any and everything. We laugh so much. He make me feel safe.
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ladylibra21
@ladylibra21
10 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 9 · Posts: 3024 · Topics: 377
Posted by Koniuchaa
Have you asked him directly how he feels about you? I think you should at this point. What is the worst that can happen?



I did. I didn't see him the next day after I did this. Then the next day he brought me in cannolis for my birthday. Still bonyrs or no to the question I asked though

https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/capricorn/so-i-probably-fucked-up-lol-7005643/
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Aerazo
@Aerazo
8 Years1,000+ PostsAquarius

Comments: 9 · Posts: 2257 · Topics: 92
Posted by SunMoonStars
Posted by Aerazo
Posted by pinkbird03
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by pinkbird03
Posted by Capri-sun
Posted by daron76
Lawd....



Soo maybe its time to call him on his BS? I've been called on mine before. I was young (26). I didn't recognize this woman was interested in me and I thought we were just having a good time . We had been flirting for a while (she was a Leo) according to her- I thought we had just been joking around. One day we were leaving a fundraiser (so we had been drinking a little bit) while we were waiting for her cab she turned to me and said " So am I getting dick tonight or what?" It took that for me to realize what was going on her end. We spent the next 10 yrs as on and off sexual partners and good friends. So, while her method may not be a great for a "relationship" it did work to "get an itch scratched" 😛 .

Not that you should have to put your self out there like that. I'm just sayin...

But, again.... ol boy... smh "utters under breath... this MF right here"

But what does it take to get a cap to commit?

I'm not even sure how to answer that question from my perspective...

Either I like him enough to be willing to or I don't. It's not so much what the other person does or doesn't do, it's moreso my level of attraction to the person.

@pinkbird03 be attentive is the best I could come up with.


It's hard when we only text. I just don't understand how we can talk everyday and build a friendship, but he doesn't want to hang out or date again. He doesn't want to date anyone right now is what he told me. But he lives right down the road. I drive by his house to go to the stores every week. It's just a very different relationship for me. I do feel like ladylibra also deals with the same exact type of relationship. It's not moving.



I have to be completely honest with you and I'm not trying to be harsh in any way.

I say that when either I'm going through something and haven't fully sorted myself or when I'm not interested or there are circumstances preventing me from wanting to commit.

So I believe it's best for you to move on confidently and close that chapter for good. Drop any & all feelings for him & if you so choose to revisit the friendship at that time do so, if not live a happy life without him. It's his loss...

I'm afraid it will never be anything more than what it is right now.


It's not that easy. There's some strange connection that keeps us in each other's life. It's comforting for both of us, I believe. I've pretty much accepted the relationship for what it is. I don't have any expectations. I'd rather have this than not talking because I tried that and it only made me desire him even more. I can't help having feelings for him and that's not going to change right now.

At the same time, I'm on a few dating sites talking to a lot of guys. Trying to find someone I like! I was talking to one guy that works for the company that owns my apartment complex. I met him twice and he's so dreamy! I want his number! I also bought a new dress and heels for tomorrow night! ?
What's your sign?

Yes I feel the same with my Cap. that's why I'm wondering if they are the same way and if there is a way to make it easier or make sure we don't cross the line, my friend says that I treat him like if he's Glass. Careful not to say anything that would be overboard or sound psycho!

He told me his personality is complicated and most people understand him. I do feel like he appreciates that I'm still there for him when he wants to talk. but sometimes I give him space and sometimes I'm the one who goes away bc I need space from him.


Totally know how you feel. I often feel like I'm walking on eggshells with my Cap.

As I've said before, I think we gotta be more like an Earth sign when dealing with Caps...

click to expand

I don't know how to be someone else so I've put him in place a few times.

My ex of 11 yrs is also a Cap and we lived together for 8 yrs, I just ended the relationship over a year ago.

we got together at 16 later we had 2 beautiful kids. A lot of ups and downs and fights because of past issues he never got over them, but I'm sure it was bc of our immaturity.

He still says that he loves me but over the years my feelings for him turned into resentment.



I've always been very patient and I need space as well.
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