Getting a Libra to Forgive You

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rockyroadicecream
@rockyroadicecream
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the Libra forum some insight...

Posted by Byron21
Posted by KaptainKhaos
Posted by Byron21
Posted by KaptainKhaos
What did you do to her that hurt her so badly that she would treat you that way?
i freaked out after the break up and pleaded for three weeks :/
Why did you break up?
i just wasn't taking care of myself. rough year, was depressed... she tried time and time again to get me out of my funk but i was being stubborn. she fell out of love/unattracted... but in a weak way, it was a day/night shift.
Posted by Byron21
the reason she wants nothing to do with me is because I called her a lot, on a harrassment level, but i had no idea a lot of the calls were going through because i was blocked. i didn't plead at all last night, just left immediately... so is that at least a gesture of change? will that make her think at all?
click to expand

We've got another one of those Cancer dudes here- infatuated and persistent because he's now being held accountable for his bullshit and is backpedalling.
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jeane
@jeane
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Posted by rockyroadicecream
Just to give the Libra forum some insight...

Posted by Byron21
Posted by KaptainKhaos
Posted by Byron21
Posted by KaptainKhaos
What did you do to her that hurt her so badly that she would treat you that way?
i freaked out after the break up and pleaded for three weeks :/
Why did you break up?
i just wasn't taking care of myself. rough year, was depressed... she tried time and time again to get me out of my funk but i was being stubborn. she fell out of love/unattracted... but in a weak way, it was a day/night shift.
Posted by Byron21
the reason she wants nothing to do with me is because I called her a lot, on a harrassment level, but i had no idea a lot of the calls were going through because i was blocked. i didn't plead at all last night, just left immediately... so is that at least a gesture of change? will that make her think at all?
We've got another one of those Cancer dudes here- infatuated and persistent because he's now being held accountable for his bullshit and is backpedalling.
click to expand

oh. that guy.
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Byron21
@Byron21
10 YearsCancer

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Posted by tiziani
You were advised by several different users on here that the best way to show you're doing better in your own life is just to live it, and let it show on the outside. That she would notice if she still cared.

Several people told you this because it's really the only way.


Instead you're choosing to focus on her as if she's responsible for your life getting better - which is more or less exactly what you said she broke up with you for in the first place.


It seems you're only vindicating her decision.
i am. hopefully she will get to see it for herself... which is the point i'm trying to get to.
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Byron21
@Byron21
10 YearsCancer

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Posted by 2Moon
LOLOLOLOL! a fricking cancer
I knew something was wrong with this guy.
"lets just assume you're proverbially dead to them" and then "well, she loves me," ..... u serious?BRUH!

like always... I didn't say a thing. I tried to be open minded... you know i'm saying?
maybe this cancer is a different cancer, ya know?
but NOP. just another emotional nigga
just another imbecile :^)
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Byron21
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Posted by Scenic
You, yourself, have stated you've already gotten to the point of harassment. There's no excuses for that. Do you know how much stress that behavior puts on the person receiving all the calls, texts, visits, etc? Just step away from the situation and leave her alone for good. If you can't do that then I'd suggest going to a therapist because this behavior is not healthy.
harassment is this broad negative blanket term, and what i did could be easily forgiven. it's been some time since that happened and our love was really strong. i know no one will ever grasp the specifics of the situation
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Scenic
@Scenic
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Posted by Byron21
Posted by Scenic
You, yourself, have stated you've already gotten to the point of harassment. There's no excuses for that. Do you know how much stress that behavior puts on the person receiving all the calls, texts, visits, etc? Just step away from the situation and leave her alone for good. If you can't do that then I'd suggest going to a therapist because this behavior is not healthy.
harassment is this broad negative blanket term, and what i did could be easily forgiven. it's been some time since that happened and our love was really strong. i know no one will ever grasp the specifics of the situation
click to expand

Remember when I said there's no excuse? No? Okay
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jeane
@jeane
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Posted by Byron21
Posted by Scenic
You, yourself, have stated you've already gotten to the point of harassment. There's no excuses for that. Do you know how much stress that behavior puts on the person receiving all the calls, texts, visits, etc? Just step away from the situation and leave her alone for good. If you can't do that then I'd suggest going to a therapist because this behavior is not healthy.
harassment is this broad negative blanket term, and what i did could be easily forgiven. it's been some time since that happened and our love was really strong. i know no one will ever grasp the specifics of the situation
click to expand

it can't have been that strong if she dumped you.

i get the sense that you're here only to get the responses that fit into your world view. the fact is you are apart, she is sleeping with other people and you are having a hard time letting go. that's understandable but there has to come a point where you stop looking back, accept the current reality and start embracing your future, regardless if it is with or without her.

it is one thing to not want to let go, but another like tiz said, to make her responsible for your happiness. if you are only improving your life because you want her to see how well you are doing, you have missed the point. it means you are still needy, just in a different way.
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Byron21
@Byron21
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Posted by beautifuldiaster
Posted by tiziani
You were advised by several different users on here that the best way to show you're doing better in your own life is just to live it, and let it show on the outside. That she would notice if she still cared.

Several people told you this because it's really the only way.


Instead you're choosing to focus on her as if she's responsible for your life getting better - which is more or less exactly what you said she broke up with you for in the first place.


It seems you're only vindicating her decision.
Ouch.

DiD you feel that?

The problem is your co dependency. Be someone of substance. Of word and heart. Be you for you. That's how you apologize to someone who wants to see you reach your potential.
click to expand

I was. I have a lot of substance and important life goals... it's what drew her to me initially. I guess I got lost in the relationship and used it as a crutch when some other things happened (friends death, managing large projects, moving, etc)... we had plans and all that. It's just hard to let go.

I have a good grasp of who I am, what I want and how I will achieve those things. Just wish she was here with me.
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Byron21
@Byron21
10 YearsCancer

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Posted by Sugarfoot
What did you do specifically to make her upset in the first place? Being depressed cause you to do (or not do) what that caused her to break up with you?
She just became unattracted to me. I gained weight and was out of a job. It was a deep depression which she tried time and time again to push me out of, but I needed to be at home to do so, so it didn't change until I got there.
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duchesslibro
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The best thing you could do is use all the energy you're currently expending on thinking about how to get her to "forgive" you and focus it in bettering yourself.. possibly on the things she was bothered by if *You* truly want to change those things for yourself (not for here.)

Idk about others but I am not comfortable with the idea that someone would change themselves just for me. It needs to be for you.

Also, realize that even if she does forgive you.. that doesn't necessarily mean she'll want to be together again right away or ever.
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Carolz
@Carolz
10 Years

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I think I will agree with everyone here. Give yourself time. I guess leaving her alone is he best solution for now. And Libra's heart will not easily get out of love if they ever truly love you . Even if they don't express it . They just take some time and I guess every one should be allowed to get that space. Work on yourself and once you feel enough time has passed may be go for a genuine apology then.
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gemguyaz34
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10 Years500+ PostsGemini

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Byron, as someone who is going through an identical situation, I can tell you to listen to what the others here are telling you. They mean well. As hard as it is to hear, sitting around in front of the computer and searching for easy-fix solutions is not going to help you in the long run. You need to be an individual again and hopefully by doing so if there is any ounce of feeling left in your Libra, they may have a change of heart. The neediness is a turn off. Though my Leeb used to tell me I was fine and all, I should have known better that it would eventually backfire in my face. If you think back on it, there were likely subtle hints given to you all along. Some of us just don't see ourselves for who we really are until we are facing it and by ourselves. Having three weeks to have thought about it has given me plenty of time to think of several things I could have done differently. You are reaching far too hard, it's not going to make her answer you. Likely she is testing the waters to see how you get on with your life as an independent. In my case, I tried to call at first (maybe for the first week every other day) and when I didn't get a response, I decided it would be best to leave it be. So two more weeks passed. Recently, I wrote a nice letter acknowledging my faults and apologizing for not listening enough and not giving them their due space when they require it. I tucked it in with a birthday card and mailed it. While I want to hope it might change the status of things, I'm still not holding my breath. I would suggest doing the same. I find diving into my work hard core has taken my mind off of the situation. When I have downtime is when it eats at me. You just need to busy yourself.
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gemguyaz34
@gemguyaz34
10 Years500+ PostsGemini

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Byron, as someone who is going through an identical situation, I can tell you to listen to what the others here are telling you. They mean well. As hard as it is to hear, sitting around in front of the computer and searching for easy-fix solutions is not going to help you in the long run. You need to be an individual again and hopefully by doing so if there is any ounce of feeling left in your Libra, they may have a change of heart. The neediness is a turn off. Though my Leeb used to tell me I was fine and all, I should have known better that it would eventually backfire in my face. If you think back on it, there were likely subtle hints given to you all along. Some of us just don't see ourselves for who we really are until we are facing it and by ourselves. Having three weeks to have thought about it has given me plenty of time to think of several things I could have done differently. You are reaching far too hard, it's not going to make her answer you. Likely she is testing the waters to see how you get on with your life as an independent. In my case, I tried to call at first (maybe for the first week every other day) and when I didn't get a response, I decided it would be best to leave it be. So two more weeks passed. Recently, I wrote a nice letter acknowledging my faults and apologizing for not listening enough and not giving them their due space when they require it. I tucked it in with a birthday card and mailed it. While I want to hope it might change the status of things, I'm still not holding my breath. I would suggest doing the same. I find diving into my work hard core has taken my mind off of the situation. When I have downtime is when it eats at me. You just need to busy yourself.
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Byron21
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10 YearsCancer

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Posted by goligold
I'm so in love with my Cancer man, i don't know if I could ever get over him if we broke up. Send her flowers with a card that says your forever in my heart..happy birthday.
See, I contemplate gifts... but she is very grounded/non material, so it has to be a very personalized gift that could double as a birthday present. But yeah, in my opinion, days before she left me (which I think she was leaving me because she thought it was for my own good -- i fucked up with the crazy desperate pleas) she was waxing poetically about how she'll never meet anyone like me or has never had a love like ours, how the sex is phenomenal, I'm the only person whose cared about her in this way, etc, so forth... that I don't think the love will ever die.

I really, really fucked up with the constant calling but she knows deep down that 1) I'm not a psychopath and 2) our love is real & eternal.

Plus she's receiving support from a pretty shitty group of people (that I can never detail who/what they do on a forum so you all just sort of have to trust me) that she made the right decision, whereas on the other hand her family loves me... but she won't listen to her family, because of family issues her whole life.
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rockyroadicecream
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Posted by Byron21
Posted by Vanish
Didn't you say that she already had sex with someone else in another thread?
Sex isn't a big deal....
click to expand

Most sane guys would have a problem with it.

This statement alone says this isn't about really getting her back, you just want your way to happen. You're making this all about you (still) and are fixated on what YOU want, not what's best for you both.

I've noticed your posts in that ex girlfriend thread. You seriously need counselling. You are so full of yourself it's creepy. You're here, pining over an ex who you emotionally abused and took advantage of, yet you're talking about someone else who's about to get married, being a snarky loser about how she wouldn't do it if you walked back into her life.

I can see why the Libra wouldn't want much to do with you. It seems as if you go through life being a self absorbed twat and when shit gets real, you act like a pouty little boy who had his favorite toy taken away.

Time to grow up, sweetheart. Not everything goes your way, especially when you act like a selfish loser toward those who care about you.
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Byron21
@Byron21
10 YearsCancer

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Posted by rockyroadicecream
Posted by Byron21
Posted by Vanish
Didn't you say that she already had sex with someone else in another thread?
Sex isn't a big deal....
Most sane guys would have a problem with it.

This statement alone says this isn't about really getting her back, you just want your way to happen. You're making this all about you (still) and are fixated on what YOU want, not what's best for you both.

I've noticed your posts in that ex girlfriend thread. You seriously need counselling. You are so full of yourself it's creepy. You're here, pining over an ex who you emotionally abused and took advantage of, yet you're talking about someone else who's about to get married, being a snarky loser about how she wouldn't do it if you walked back into her life.

I can see why the Libra wouldn't want much to do with you. It seems as if you go through life being a self absorbed twat and when shit gets real, you act like a pouty little boy who had his favorite toy taken away.

Time to grow up, sweetheart. Not everything goes your way, especially when you act like a selfish loser toward those who care about you.
click to expand

look i'm really sorry about ur mom lol but ur blocked 😉
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rockyroadicecream
@rockyroadicecream
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Posted by Byron21
Posted by rockyroadicecream
Posted by Byron21
Posted by Vanish
Didn't you say that she already had sex with someone else in another thread?
Sex isn't a big deal....
Most sane guys would have a problem with it.

This statement alone says this isn't about really getting her back, you just want your way to happen. You're making this all about you (still) and are fixated on what YOU want, not what's best for you both.

I've noticed your posts in that ex girlfriend thread. You seriously need counselling. You are so full of yourself it's creepy. You're here, pining over an ex who you emotionally abused and took advantage of, yet you're talking about someone else who's about to get married, being a snarky loser about how she wouldn't do it if you walked back into her life.

I can see why the Libra wouldn't want much to do with you. It seems as if you go through life being a self absorbed twat and when shit gets real, you act like a pouty little boy who had his favorite toy taken away.

Time to grow up, sweetheart. Not everything goes your way, especially when you act like a selfish loser toward those who care about you.
look i'm really sorry about ur mom lol but ur blocked 😉
click to expand

...this response alone really illustrates the level of psychosis you're suffering.


...dafuq does my mom have to do with any of this? And a winky face?

Fucking freak.
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rockyroadicecream
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Posted by goligold
Posted by rockyroadicecream
Posted by goligold
I'm so in love with my Cancer man, i don't know if I could ever get over him if we broke up. Send her flowers with a card that says your forever in my heart..happy birthday.
*facepalm*

Please, just stop with this delusional crap.

Image Not Found
Ok Rocky, I agree with you this time 🙂
click to expand

Don't get me wrong, in the appropriate situation, this would be a sweet gesture.

...but in this case, it wouldn't be.
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gemguyaz34
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10 Years500+ PostsGemini

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Posted by Byron21
Posted by utopian
Rock is bang on. Youre way too full of yourself to get past this. No wonder you're a depressed mess.

It's always about you. Thats where you fail. You you you you..

I bet she fucking hates you. Libras don't come back to your kind of shit.

Kill this thread already.
lol
click to expand

You are laughing at her but she's correct. If you're only here to run around in circles and not take any advice then what difference does it make if anyone tells you what to do? It seems you are only being receiving of what you want to hear. Every person in this board has given you advice one way or another, whether it be letting her take the time to cool off and re-evaluate the relationship or writing her a nice kind-hearted letter but not being dramatic about it. You don't seem to be receptive to either, so I too have to agree with Rock here.
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Byron21
@Byron21
10 YearsCancer

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Posted by gemguyaz34
Posted by Byron21
Posted by utopian
Rock is bang on. Youre way too full of yourself to get past this. No wonder you're a depressed mess.

It's always about you. Thats where you fail. You you you you..

I bet she fucking hates you. Libras don't come back to your kind of shit.

Kill this thread already.
lol
You are laughing at her but she's correct. If you're only here to run around in circles and not take any advice then what difference does it make if anyone tells you what to do? It seems you are only being receiving of what you want to hear. Every person in this board has given you advice one way or another, whether it be letting her take the time to cool off and re-evaluate the relationship or writing her a nice kind-hearted letter but not being dramatic about it. You don't seem to be receptive to either, so I too have to agree with Rock here.
click to expand

I'm certainly receptive to the regular, level headed advice...

but then there are the miserable nobodies who go around the forum and negate anything anyone is saying, and I could care less about what those losers have to say.

I'm thinking about building her a beehive for her birthday since she just started working for a honey farm and expressed interest in harvesting her own honey. So it'd be a nice gesture. Give her a letter and some flowers, too. It would show I've changed because I put the time & effort to put it together myself, when I'm not really of a handy-craft, though I do have the skillset.