I think I hurt my Libra fwb (Page 3)

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lotuslily
@lotuslily
14 Years1,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 4 · Posts: 1107 · Topics: 77
Posted by enfant_terrible
@lotuslily: C'mon now, all you Aries chicks are quick to start and first to the finishing line! Besides, as Royalty I don't expect to be doing much but making myself available 😛

So just use me any way you see fit! ;-P



HA! I like my playthings alive thanks... if you're just going to lie there like a starfish, forget about it. I want the hammering from behind for hours you Leo guys are so good at!
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lotuslily
@lotuslily
14 Years1,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 4 · Posts: 1107 · Topics: 77
Posted by feby16aqua
Lily....what's bothering you more? Since you don't have feelings for him...
Just let it go for now and focus on something else. He will contact you. The sex will contact you lol.

Don't give power to the silence. You can win without strong arming it. 🙂

Rams lol **hugs**



Enfant's pompous sexual invitations are keeping me pretty focused on something else for now!

Nah... I'm pretty chilled about it really... i just want to keep the conversation flowing in here with you lovely people... I've missed dxp! Been a while since I hung out here. It's so nice getting objective honest perspectives!

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theGrinch
@theGrinch
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 265 · Topics: 19
It's not that we intentionally try to ruin relationships, it's just that it's so rare to find someone who gets us that we assume it can't be true. Then we delve into our own little world for a bit and they leave. To us, that just confirms they didn't truly get us. We love attention so daily interaction is a big deal for us. But if we're mad, yeah don't contact us unless it's with an apology because of something you actually did(which is why in this case I would not say for you to contact him because you aren't wrong).

In my head, I wonder how he would have handled the three way with the other girl and you? Let's face it, if he was down for that then he's a hypocrite for getting mad about you being with this other dude. Fact is, he will contact you and it's best to let him be till then. Longest I have gone was two weeks and that was because I knew I was in the right. We worked together, so I made it known I was ticked and didn't do any of the normal things I would.

Two weeks later I got what I wanted which was the apology. Not the best one ever, but from this woman it was a feat unto itself so I accepted it. Hang in there and he'll come back one way or the other. He might not come back with the answer you want, but you'll know where you stand.
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lotuslily
@lotuslily
14 Years1,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 4 · Posts: 1107 · Topics: 77
Posted by theGrinch
It's not that we intentionally try to ruin relationships, it's just that it's so rare to find someone who gets us that we assume it can't be true. Then we delve into our own little world for a bit and they leave. To us, that just confirms they didn't truly get us. We love attention so daily interaction is a big deal for us. But if we're mad, yeah don't contact us unless it's with an apology because of something you actually did(which is why in this case I would not say for you to contact him because you aren't wrong).

In my head, I wonder how he would have handled the three way with the other girl and you? Let's face it, if he was down for that then he's a hypocrite for getting mad about you being with this other dude. Fact is, he will contact you and it's best to let him be till then. Longest I have gone was two weeks and that was because I knew I was in the right. We worked together, so I made it known I was ticked and didn't do any of the normal things I would.

Two weeks later I got what I wanted which was the apology. Not the best one ever, but from this woman it was a feat unto itself so I accepted it. Hang in there and he'll come back one way or the other. He might not come back with the answer you want, but you'll know where you stand.



Yeah, I'm convinced he's mostly pissed off cus he wasn't the lucky guy. Actually... last time we planned a threesome with the other lady, he also just disappeared. Maybe it was also a test of some sort??
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lotuslily
@lotuslily
14 Years1,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 4 · Posts: 1107 · Topics: 77
Posted by theGrinch
Seems like someone doesn't like to share regardless of who's it with. Yup, he's got strong feelings for you and is beyond the FWB relationship. If he comes back and says he's cool with the current arrangement I'd tread lightly because I don't think he is. It will be unhappy Libra and disappearing Libra, not fun for anyone involved.



Well... like i said before, I'm happy to ditch the rest for now and just have him... but then I'm going to need him to come over for routine maintenance a lot more often! Meat is meat and this girl must eat!
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lotuslily
@lotuslily
14 Years1,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 4 · Posts: 1107 · Topics: 77
haha... just found these:

* How many Aries does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but it takes a lot of light bulbs.

* How many Tauruses does it take to change a light bulb?
What?Me?Move?

* How many Geminis does it take to change a light bulb?
II

* How many Cancers does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but he has to bring his mother.

* How many Leos does it take to change a light bulb?
A dozen. One to change the bulb, and eleven to applaud.

* How many Virgos does it take to change a light bulb?
Five. One to clean out the socket, one to dust the bulb,
one to install, and two engineers to check the work.

* How many Libras does it take to change a light bulb?
Libras can't decide if the bulb needs to be changed.

* How many Scorpios does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They LIKE the dark.

* How many Sagittarians does it take to change a light bulb?
One to install the bulb, and a Virgo to pick up the pieces.

* How many Capricorns does it take to change a light bulb?
The light's fine as it is.

* How many Aquarians does it take to change a light bulb?
Have you asked the bulb if it WANTS to be changed?

* How many Pisceans does it take to change a light bulb?
What light bulb?

And another thing I found —
The Ascendant is the Stage itself!
The Sun is the Star of the show!
The Moon is the Audience!
Mercury is the playwright and script editor!
Venus is the talent scout, but also the romantic leading lady and the supporting cast!
Mars is the choreographer and perhaps the whole chorus line!
Jupiter is the director and producer!
Saturn is the theatre critic!
Uranus is the sound & light technician, but also the publicity agent!
Neptune is the orchestra, but also the costume & set designer responsible for the illusion the show projects!
Pluto is the investor and creditor who puts up the money for a later return!

AHAHA and another one! ~
ARIES: —Dear God! Give me PATIENCE and I want it NOW !??

TAURUS: —Dear God, please help me accept CHANGE in my life, but NOT YET.??

GEMINI: —Yo God??_(or is it Goddess?)??_Who are you—_What are you—_..Where are You—_..How many of you ARE there? I can't figure you out!??

CANCER: —Dear Daddy, I know I shouldn't depend on you so much, but you??re the only One I can count on while my security blanket is at the cleaners.??

LEO: —Hi, Pop! I??ll bet you??re really proud to have me as your kid!??

VIRGO: —Dear Go
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lotuslily
@lotuslily
14 Years1,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 4 · Posts: 1107 · Topics: 77

VIRGO: —Dear God, please make the world a better place, and don't screw it up like you did the last time.??

LIBRA: —Dear God, I know I should make decisions for myself. But, on the other hand, what do YOU think—

SCORPIO: —Dear God, help me forgive my enemies, even if the bastards don't deserve it.??

SAGITTARIUS: —OH ALMIGHTY, ALL KNOWING, ALL -LOVING, ALL -POWERFUL, OMNIPRESENT, EVERLASTING GOD, IF I??VE ASKED YOU ONCE, I??VE ASKED YOU A THOUSAND TIMES — HELP ME STOP EXAGGERATING!!!!!!!!!!??

CAPRICORN: —Dear Father, I was going to pray, but I guess I ought to figure things out for myself. Thanks anyway.??

AQUARIUS: —Hi God! Some say you??re a man. Some say you??re a woman. I say we??re ALL God. So, why pray? Let's have a party!??

PISCES: —Heavenly Father, as I prepare to consume this last fifth of Scotch to drown out my pain and sorrow, may my inebriation be for Thy greater Honor and Glory.??

The last one's the zodiac sign??s prayers to God =]
And I got to give —Gellex?? credit for the Gemini one ;D
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lotuslily
@lotuslily
14 Years1,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 4 · Posts: 1107 · Topics: 77
OOOH! There has been contact!
He's being quite short with me and playing down the drama from the other night. And I feel he's tryna take some digs at me....
This -- >
Him: ... are we still going to hook up and stuff? i never said anything agains it. what you doing tonight
Me: yes... i'm home tonight
Him: sure
ME: sure what?
Him: we can still have sex
Me: good, i really enjoy you
Him: my company?
Me: yeah... and your sex. you're cool
Him: awesome. what was up with all those msg sunday?
Me: seriously?
we had quite a dramatic conversation on saturday night Logs
I was worried about you after
Him: ok, i just said im not attracted to another dudes cock in you?
Me: yeah... but you were angry... and you had been drinking... and I was worried
Him: dont be, ever
Me: I'm a human being... I get concerned about people
I'm not cold
I was just happy you were safe when I called you back after I heard you getting into an argument with someone
Him: ok
Me: so when are you coming over?
Him: you tell me
Me: you're the one who has to drive...
Him: you tell me
Me: tonight??
Him: hmmm
Me: yeah... hmmmm
Him: far drive
Me: up to you... i'm mellow if you don't want to make the drive. it's understable
Him: whats on the menu for tonight?
Me: depends
Him: on?
Me: whether you come over or not
Him: well i first need to see the menu befor i can make a decision.
Me: hahaha
what do you feel like?
thought we'd just go with the flow and see where the night takes us
easy breezy
Him: your not very good at convincing
Me: i feel you should know by now you always have a good time
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lotuslily
@lotuslily
14 Years1,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 4 · Posts: 1107 · Topics: 77
Yeah, I think he's trying to piss me off... he just disappeared again after that reply. It probably would have pissed me off if I wasn't enjoying being in a Higher-self state where there are far bigger things to focus on than some little boy's silly games. I wrote him off in my head just now. It just won't be fun and light anymore anyway... it's damaged and only repairable if two parts are consciously aware of themselves and reality. He needs to evolve within himself some more. I don't even think I'll tell him it's game over. It'll just add to the drama... and he'll up his 'game. At least now we have made polite contact and if I leave it, next time I see him in a social arrangement, I can just be a friendly bud.

What do you guys think?
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rockyroadicecream
@rockyroadicecream
13 Years10,000+ Posts

Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
I dunno, I'd be turned off at this point, regardless of how good the sex is. Too much of a hassle.

The last fwb I had (not a libra), acted just as stupid and childish because he couldn't handle his emotions.

Too much drama for fwb, tbh. Especially when it's the guy causing the drama. I thought that was left up to the female??

It's irritating when you have to take on the masculine role in this shit.
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theGrinch
@theGrinch
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 265 · Topics: 19
Ah FWB can work, but it takes the right two people. It's funny because in this case it could have been exclusive, but he choose to just not say what he meant. Eventually we know we have to blurt it out, he did (with alcohol), but then attempted to hide it. Might have been better off keeping his wits about him and sticking to the story (i.e. I don't want you with anyone else). I learned this some time ago, if your ticked and the person finally reaches out you better let them know exactly where you stand. It's better for everyone involved.
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LilliLou
@LilliLou
12 Years1,000+ PostsScorpio

Comments: 391 · Posts: 3020 · Topics: 28
Posted by theGrinch
As I always try to tell people, just because we're aloof most of the time doesn't mean we don't care or have feelings. My family will laugh and tell me all the time I don't have feelings. Then they'll wonder why I disappear for awhile or blow up. If we care for you, we give our all and do everything we can to show you how much we care. Then, as is usually the case, something happens and due to us usually going with the flow people assume it's no big deal. When inside, for us, it was the biggest deal in the world. To add insult to injury, we expected you to just know it without us having to say it because we're pretty sure we know just about everything about you.

To me, I believe he felt you should just know it wasn't cool even though he was saying it was. We don't like people to know we aren't everything they believe we are. I mean when people constantly say this or that about you, you don't want to disappoint no matter how out of balance it makes you. Little by little though, the scales start to tip and that's when you get the response that you did. I'd say it was brewing for sometime and that last grain of sand put him over the edge.

We love attention and we love flirting, but we don't lend ourselves well to the FWB relationship. Plus we tend to be able to grow to really like someone. So where initially he might have just liked you and was cool with everything, I think he grew to love you and that throws us for a loop. We are always on the hunt for it and when we find it (or at least our idea of it) it's tough to let it go or see someone else enjoy your attention. That's my take anyway.



Actually smiling ruefully... I have so much Libra in my chart, and especially with the Venus and never understood why I wasn't all vicious scorpio! I cannot believe how much the Grinch post resonated with me- Insane!!!
I'm extricating from a FWB relationship with a Leo, and damn the sex is amazing, but I have gotten attached and can't handle his lack of constant contact.

Being an aries or aqua sounds so much cooler- in every respect! LotusLily and FebyAqua I love the confidence you exude- inspirational!
Taurus Nikki and The Grinch- I am learning, astounded, mouth agape, but learning... very cool- thanks!

LotusLily I hope you throw this poor confused Leeb a break if he gets his shit together- but either way you're one tough cookie... Think
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Sag89
@Sag89
14 Years1,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 0 · Posts: 4517 · Topics: 108
I know how you feel, I have a sex life like that at times and some people just aren't cut out for that sort of thing.

It's like they like the fantasty better in their head than when it actually plays out.


I had a libra fwb ( i guess still do haven't seen him in a while ) and he sometimes was that way but mostly really chill about the whole thing. He was pretty much always there.


I found scorpios to be the hardest to understand the set up.


Hopefully it goes back to normal.

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Sag89
@Sag89
14 Years1,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 0 · Posts: 4517 · Topics: 108
Posted by rockyroadicecream
I dunno, I'd be turned off at this point, regardless of how good the sex is. Too much of a hassle.

The last fwb I had (not a libra), acted just as stupid and childish because he couldn't handle his emotions.

Too much drama for fwb, tbh. Especially when it's the guy causing the drama. I thought that was left up to the female??

It's irritating when you have to take on the masculine role in this shit.




I sometimes think woman have a higher sex drive
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lotuslily
@lotuslily
14 Years1,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 4 · Posts: 1107 · Topics: 77
OK... the plot thickens with this one!
we eventually spoke about me having the threesome without him. i asked him if he wanted to have a threesome... he said "I've heard that one before!" then i said sorry and he said "I asked you so nicely to do that with me and you found a replacement for me." so i made sure to slot in "Stand in, not replacement" and explained that at the time he kept making and breaking plans and i thought "to hell with this guy, I'm going out to make my own fun"

vibes have been ok... but we haven't been out in a social situation where we're both around our mutual friends and that happened this weekend just past. in the run up to it i kept getting lectures and being grilled about who i've told because he doesn't want things to be weird when our friends are around. i don't know whether he thinks i'm going to hang all over him or try hold his hand in front of everyone... i'm not... and i didn't... and it went all cool. then he drove me home and he was very different with me! HE was really gentle and supportive and trying to find out what made me upset the week before when i told him i spent a day crying last week... he wouldn't rest up until he found out it was because a friendship with a guy had come to an end.

He held me more during and after sex, we kissed a lot more, when i felt insecure at one point, he opened his arm for me to come lie on his chest and he said "you don't have to feel insecure because it's me"

on sunday night he said he wanted to pick me up today to go do our fav sport together and i said we'll see how things go on the day because i never know with him whether he's going to go ghost or whatever.

So yesterday i ask him if we're still on for today. He went ghost and i haven't heard from him again. I know he's been on his phone... you can see on iphone with whatsapp when the last time someone was online.
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lotuslily
@lotuslily
14 Years1,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 4 · Posts: 1107 · Topics: 77
in the meantime! Since he has gone ghost... i have felt i'm not getting laid enough and he lives far away and it's unreasonable of me to expect him to drop what he's doing and drive an hour to come do me. so i thought of taking on another lover.
BUT!!! there are those sanctions he placed on my vagina after the threesome remember: "I am seriously in love with your vagina and i don't want any other penises anywhere near your vagina!"

So while he probably has his nose stuck in his xbox with GTA5, someone else is trying to GT my vagina! this other guy (A Gemini) doesn't know about the Libra.... BUT THEY ARE REALLY CLOSE FRIENDS!!!!

and he lives in my hood... more or less... and i am sexually attracted to him. I told Gemini about Libra and he said it definitely changed his thought process about it and that he doesn't want to bleak his friend out, but if his Libra is not emotionally attached, then Gemini is ready to proceed with becoming my 2nd lover.

advice anyone?
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lotuslily
@lotuslily
14 Years1,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 4 · Posts: 1107 · Topics: 77
He's gone ghost and i want to speak to him to find out if he's emotionally attached to me since we started having sex. the fact that he's gone ghost and hasn't answered meshould be answer enough for an aries, but i know it's probably not that simple with a libra...

WHAT IS GOING ON?? AND HOW DO I BEST FIND OUT if he is emotionally attached because i'm pretty sure as shit he aint gonna just tell me!
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rockyroadicecream
@rockyroadicecream
13 Years10,000+ Posts

Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
What a cakey eaty fool.

He doesn't own you and since the situation is what it is, you go do what you want. You've tried on your part to talk to him about all this and he's being a 5 year old about it and playing video games to top it off.

Fuck that.

Also, it's a fwb. I have no idea why you think he needs to know about you sleeping with someone else. There's no such thing as sanctioning your vagina since you two aren't even exclusive. Again, he's being selfish and cakey eaty.