sole2
@sole2
11 YearsPisces
Comments: 0 · Posts: 137 · Topics: 8
Libra love of my life
Woman, your dying eggs are trying to rush you into bad decisions.
Posted by TotiHe said he made the rational decision years ago to move on because we were in a long distance relationship. It wasn't a choice he made about love. Remember, not everyone makes life choices based on love only, life is more complicated than that.
I can understand your clinginess because of the pieces placements of yours. But that virgo venus should be more objective and detached. If he loved you, respected you,admired you, her wouldn't marry someone else
Posted by TotiWhy 4 years later decide to keep me on his hook? We are on 2 different continents. It's not even physically possible to have an affair even if we wanted to.
He doesn't feel that he lost you. He sent you a message to keep you on the hook. You just confirmed what he already knee-deep that you are willing to take more crap from him. really? He just got married and already has issues? I would not believe the word he says. Keep in mind that he wouldn't behave that way if he loved you. Move on and live your life. A douchebag like him isn't making your life better. And he is a Libra. Yuk.
Why now? For 4 years he made no effort to keep me on his hook. And seriously, if you were married less than a year, and it is your first new year night as a married couple, would you be spending time writing an ex you feel nothing for? If he was really happy in his marriage he just wouldn't have had the time to bother himself with an ex at that point.
I'd really just like insightful replies, especially from a libra perspective or someone with libra experience, rather then just easy responses that aren't very thoughtful about my original post.
The reality is you are going to believe what you want to believe. No amount of "real talk" is going to sway you from your path. That's OK. We all have to do what we have to do.
But here is my exercise in futility.
This guy is going through a rough time so reminiscenced in a romantic sense about a time when life was better. This is his fantasy too.
Its not about you. It's about him trying to self soothe.
You want to believe that he is still in love with you because that's your way of self soothing.
If he is in love with anything he is in love with that time you shared and his memories of how it was. It doesn't mean it really was like that or even that it would be like that again.
Stop living in the past. You've both got rose coloured glasses firmly on.
But here is my exercise in futility.
This guy is going through a rough time so reminiscenced in a romantic sense about a time when life was better. This is his fantasy too.
Its not about you. It's about him trying to self soothe.
You want to believe that he is still in love with you because that's your way of self soothing.
If he is in love with anything he is in love with that time you shared and his memories of how it was. It doesn't mean it really was like that or even that it would be like that again.
Stop living in the past. You've both got rose coloured glasses firmly on.
Posted by sole2Okay.....
I'd really just like insightful replies, rather then just easy responses that aren't very thoughtful about my original post.
1.) You are living in the past
2.) With a guy that couldn't accept that sometimes life doesn't go as planned (broken promises)
3.) And went on a knee jerk reaction to find someone else which he found 2 women later
4.) All of that prevents you to find someone else, more suitable
5.) Because you're not giving it 100% and that is because....see #1
Posted by Mr_PinchyExactly. This guy was never chasing her (he quickly dropped her and moved on). He was always chasing the life style . Now that's not as he hoped it would be, he is going back to a time before he made those decisions. He's still chasing the dream. She is inconsequential.Posted by sole2Okay.....
I'd really just like insightful replies, rather then just easy responses that aren't very thoughtful about my original post.
1.) You are living in the past
2.) With a guy that couldn't accept that sometimes life doesn't go as planned (broken promises)
3.) And went on a knee jerk reaction to find someone else which he found 2 women later
4.) All of that prevents you to find someone else, more suitable
5.) Because you're not giving it 100% and that is because....see #1
click to expand
Posted by tizianiI don't know how well he knows me. But during our time together I learned a lot about him, enough that I had reached the point of knowing even his flaws and making the choice that I could live with and work with those flaws, like how if he is upset he emotionally shuts down and doesn't communicate his feelings or need a very well. And he'd do the libra thing of being diplomatic whereas I am much more straightforward and to the point. I had to learn to read him in that way and I was okay with it. Hence I know even now not to take what he says at face value all the time but read between the lines.
Without trying to step on what you feel is your connection, the way you write about him comes across as if you do not know much about each other at all. And if you don't know we definitely do not.
At this point the most it sounds like is he hit you with one of the most creative euphemisms for sex I've read
'close a loop and unknown fate that lies ahead'.
Posted by jeane
The reality is you are going to believe what you want to believe. No amount of "real talk" is going to sway you from your path. That's OK. We all have to do what we have to do.
But here is my exercise in futility.
This guy is going through a rough time so reminiscenced in a romantic sense about a time when life was better. This is his fantasy too.
Its not about you. It's about him trying to self soothe.
You want to believe that he is still in love with you because that's your way of self soothing.
If he is in love with anything he is in love with that time you shared and his memories of how it was. It doesn't mean it really was like that or even that it would be like that again.
Stop living in the past. You've both got rose coloured glasses firmly on.
I have thought that is a possibility too. I don't know how much of it is real regret and how much is his self soothing. I know I am not totally objective because I am still invested, hence I needed to get other opinions. My best friend who is also a libra and has been there for me through this thing over the years wants me to fight for him in case there is a chance. At least if it fails I wouldn't need to spend more years wondering. Because the painful thing really is that we broke up mostly because of other people and circumstances, it didn't have to do with how we felt about each other. Other people in both our lives were really negative and discouraging about the long distance. I was younger and gave in to the pressure, so did he. If I knew then what i know now, the fact that all those discouraging people continued with their lives unaffected, and we are the ones still experiencing the pain of that loss, I wouldn't have listened to them. Now I'll make a choice that makes sense to me, win or lose at least it would have been my choice. Now older and wiser I know to trust myself more.
Posted by Mr_PinchyPosted by sole2Okay.....
I'd really just like insightful replies, rather then just easy responses that aren't very thoughtful about my original post.
1.) You are living in the past
2.) With a guy that couldn't accept that sometimes life doesn't go as planned (broken promises)
3.) And went on a knee jerk reaction to find someone else which he found 2 women later
4.) All of that prevents you to find someone else, more suitable
5.) Because you're not giving it 100% and that is because....see #1
click to expand
Hahaha yes I know I am living in the past. Hence why I finally, 4 years later decided to tell him my truths. I was too prideful back then to really fight for him or to just say how i truly feel. I acted like it was no big deal to lose him because I was too prideful to let him know how much he meant to me. I now also told him my truths about the things he did that really hurt me that were awful, and he was very gracious and apologised, rather than be defensive or make excuses. That showed me he has matured in the last 4 years. Most men I have been with have gaslighted or been defensive when I call them out.
So I did decide that after 4 years I need to stop living in the past, i really am a self aware person.
I honestly did not expect him to be so gracious, I honestly thought that swallowing my pride 4 years later would be the thing that would release me from the past. I am 32 years old. I am not a love sick girl. I have had other relationships, two since him, with abusive people. I left all of them. Even the ex's who were not terrible, I am indifferent towards them. That point where you are totally over someone. I am still in touch with some of them. No one makes me feel the way he does, and I honestly don't know why.
Posted by WaterbearerwearerPosted by sole2Libra moon here..
I'd really just like insightful replies, especially from a libra perspective or someone with libra experience, rather then just easy responses that aren't very thoughtful about my original post.
He’s thinking he made a mistake. He let a good one go so to speak.
Duly I say unto you- keep the boundary lines clear af. Don’t be accessible. Set limits to exchanges.
He’s still married and you’re not seconds so don’t get carried away with his fantasy.
click to expand
Yeah I think so too. I told myself I will wait for his reply and based on that I will make the choice to totally cut him loose or fight for him. I am a catch so I am not worried about finding someone else. I honestly feel this is the moment that is finally going to close this chapter in my life. Either by some miracle we will get back together, or it's what I've been needing to move on.
Posted by jeaneI have to clarify. He didn't drop me at all. He said then and he repeated now, our relationship was getting too hard for him. I understand he is human too, no one wants to be in something that they don't find fulfilling anymore. He had every right to end things. He tried to end things by breaking up with me. I was the one who cried and was hysterical and didn't let him move on graciously. I made the break up harder than it should have been. He kept in touch a few weeks hoping I'd eventually come to terms with it.Posted by Mr_PinchyExactly. This guy was never chasing her (he quickly dropped her and moved on). He was always chasing the life style . Now that's not as he hoped it would be, he is going back to a time before he made those decisions. He's still chasing the dream. She is inconsequential.Posted by sole2Okay.....
I'd really just like insightful replies, rather then just easy responses that aren't very thoughtful about my original post.
1.) You are living in the past
2.) With a guy that couldn't accept that sometimes life doesn't go as planned (broken promises)
3.) And went on a knee jerk reaction to find someone else which he found 2 women later
4.) All of that prevents you to find someone else, more suitable
5.) Because you're not giving it 100% and that is because....see #1
click to expand
If a Libra man, or any man of any sign, starts playing mind games, do the confused tango, string you along or do any of the crap he did IGNORE AND MOVE ON.
You want a mature man, none of this childish shit.
You want a mature man, none of this childish shit.
Posted by sole2Posted by jeaneI have to clarify. He didn't drop me at all. He said then and he repeated now, our relationship was getting too hard for him. I understand he is human too, no one wants to be in something that they don't find fulfilling anymore. He had every right to end things. He tried to end things by breaking up with me. I was the one who cried and was hysterical and didn't let him move on graciously. I made the break up harder than it should have been. He kept in touch a few weeks hoping I'd eventually come to terms with it.Posted by Mr_PinchyExactly. This guy was never chasing her (he quickly dropped her and moved on). He was always chasing the life style . Now that's not as he hoped it would be, he is going back to a time before he made those decisions. He's still chasing the dream. She is inconsequential.Posted by sole2Okay.....
I'd really just like insightful replies, rather then just easy responses that aren't very thoughtful about my original post.
1.) You are living in the past
2.) With a guy that couldn't accept that sometimes life doesn't go as planned (broken promises)
3.) And went on a knee jerk reaction to find someone else which he found 2 women later
4.) All of that prevents you to find someone else, more suitable
5.) Because you're not giving it 100% and that is because....see #1
click to expand
He dropped you. He found someone else to replace you, then he found someone else again. He dropped you. All because he did it with a smile on his face doesn't mean he didn't do it.
Possibly the reason why you havent moved on from him after two abusive relationships (sorry to hear that) is because he was always long distance. Even more reason that this has become a fantasy relationship.
Ignore your Libra friend. They are wasting your time for some bullshit hallmark channel ending.
I am honestly just scared.
I'm scared he does have the right intentions towards me. And he leaves his wife and we get back together, but he would have changed in the last 3 years in ways I couldn't live with. Then I would have ruined a marriage for nothing. I have promised myself that I will never ask him to leave her. It has to be his own choice independent of me. But I am also scared that he delays it and then they have kids and we'd never be able to be together again.
I am scared that this is his ways. If we were together and had problems he'd run off to someone else and not fix us, like he seems to be doing with his wife. The logical thing here is that he works things out in his less than 1 year marriage than to try to work things out with an ex on a different continent. But logic tells me this marriage is going to end whether I am in the picture or not because how can you be miserable longing for an ex (or memory) barely a year into a fresh marriage. Before the wedding he did tell me he was stressed out but i assumed it was just wedding jitters.
But what if this is just a fluke and he genuinely regrets and we would be happy together finally. I know right now I'm 70% willing to pack up my life for him.
But I'm also scared if I walk away now because of all of the above, id spend not 4 years, but the redt of my life wondering and regretting. Im a pisces, I don't love easily but when I do I struggle to move on.
I'm a Virgo moon so I am thinking of all the possible outcomes (he's Virgo moon too). And it is overwhelming whether to know to trust my pisces intuition or my Virgo rationality. Pisces intuition is 'he's the one and is worth the risk'. Virgo logic says this is a mess that can't end well.
I'm scared he does have the right intentions towards me. And he leaves his wife and we get back together, but he would have changed in the last 3 years in ways I couldn't live with. Then I would have ruined a marriage for nothing. I have promised myself that I will never ask him to leave her. It has to be his own choice independent of me. But I am also scared that he delays it and then they have kids and we'd never be able to be together again.
I am scared that this is his ways. If we were together and had problems he'd run off to someone else and not fix us, like he seems to be doing with his wife. The logical thing here is that he works things out in his less than 1 year marriage than to try to work things out with an ex on a different continent. But logic tells me this marriage is going to end whether I am in the picture or not because how can you be miserable longing for an ex (or memory) barely a year into a fresh marriage. Before the wedding he did tell me he was stressed out but i assumed it was just wedding jitters.
But what if this is just a fluke and he genuinely regrets and we would be happy together finally. I know right now I'm 70% willing to pack up my life for him.
But I'm also scared if I walk away now because of all of the above, id spend not 4 years, but the redt of my life wondering and regretting. Im a pisces, I don't love easily but when I do I struggle to move on.
I'm a Virgo moon so I am thinking of all the possible outcomes (he's Virgo moon too). And it is overwhelming whether to know to trust my pisces intuition or my Virgo rationality. Pisces intuition is 'he's the one and is worth the risk'. Virgo logic says this is a mess that can't end well.
Posted by tizianiOnly a Libra can pull that off. Lmao
Without trying to step on what you feel is your connection, the way you write about him comes across as if you do not know much about each other at all. And if you don't know we definitely do not.
At this point the most it sounds like is he hit you with one of the most creative euphemisms for sex I've read
'close a loop and unknown fate that lies ahead'.
Posted by sole2You're overthinking everything.
I am honestly just scared.
I'm scared he does have the right intentions towards me. And he leaves his wife and we get back together, but he would have changed in the last 3 years in ways I couldn't live with. Then I would have ruined a marriage for nothing. I have promised myself that I will never ask him to leave her. It has to be his own choice independent of me. But I am also scared that he delays it and then they have kids and we'd never be able to be together again.
I am scared that this is his ways. If we were together and had problems he'd run off to someone else and not fix us, like he seems to be doing with his wife. The logical thing here is that he works things out in his less than 1 year marriage than to try to work things out with an ex on a different continent. But logic tells me this marriage is going to end whether I am in the picture or not because how can you be miserable longing for an ex (or memory) barely a year into a fresh marriage. Before the wedding he did tell me he was stressed out but i assumed it was just wedding jitters.
But what if this is just a fluke and he genuinely regrets and we would be happy together finally. I know right now I'm 70% willing to pack up my life for him.
But I'm also scared if I walk away now because of all of the above, id spend not 4 years, but the redt of my life wondering and regretting. Im a pisces, I don't love easily but when I do I struggle to move on.
I'm a Virgo moon so I am thinking of all the possible outcomes (he's Virgo moon too). And it is overwhelming whether to know to trust my pisces intuition or my Virgo rationality. Pisces intuition is 'he's the one and is worth the risk'. Virgo logic says this is a mess that can't end well.
You haven't even seen each other yet, not met for 4 years, he lives in another country and he's married.
His intentions if anything is to use you as a distraction. He's dealing with the daily grind. The first year of marriage is hard. Why not indulge in a bit of harmless flirting away from reality as a way to make yourself feel better?
Posted by Toti
Both are living in fantasy land of what they hope things will become. Why coming here if you will stubbornly defend your opinion? Do what you want. Do as you like. No amount of logic and common sense people display here will help you because you are more than willing to crash with him. Men know women well. Especially women they had some contact with. He knows you are always going to be available. He knows that if he tells you a couple of sweet words now that for the next five years you will wait for him. That's not what you should bring. He is MARRIED. No matter how unhappy he might be, that's his problem not yours. Let him solve his problem first and not use you for his ego boost. You are 32. Yes, we make decisions based on many things and not love only. He has made his decisions twice not including you. I don't know how you can't see that. It has nothing to do with a specific zodiac sign. It has to do with respect. A man doesn't respect you nor his newly wedded wife. What makes you think the two of you would live a fairytale when you don't even know each other.
Ummm you have so many things wrong here.
I clearly am not living in a fantasy land or expect a fairytale ending, hence my earlier post that I have considered all possible outcomes, not just the one I am hoping for.
He knows I have been with other men, I have had a serious relationship after him where I almost got engaged. So he knows I have moved on before, even still loving him, and I will do it again if I have to. Did I not move on for 4 years and live my life? I haven't been sitting around waiting for him. I have an awesome social life, good friends, and a fulfilling career and a good income. I don't need him for anything. I want him. And a want can go unfulfilled and one will still be okay.
I KNOW he is married. Hence I've made it clear that I am not going to ask him to leave his wife, it is his issue as that was his choice. In fact, I made it clear that I fear him leaving his wife in the event me and him don't work out if he does leave her for me.
And many people walk away from relationships only to regret and come back later. Me and him are not some weird case. So yeah, he did not choose me when we broke up. OBVIOUSLY that broke my heart. I cannot be heartbroken about something I am unaware of 🙂
You seem to think life & people are black and white. You have no awareness that people are complicated. That sometimes we do things that are not good for us, or things that we know not to do. It is not impossible that he did not choose me but has chosen relationships after me that were not happy and unfulfilling, but were practical and logical. He is a libra after all.
Your judgmental tone makes me think you are perfect, that you have never hurt someone, or that you have never been hurt, that you have never had a regret. And I don't think anyone is thaaaat perfect. I'm not looking for judgmental opinions here, or people talking to me like I'm stupid. I'm looking for human beings who even if they can't understand or relate, can help me think this through. Perhaps I come across as sticking to my opinion and ignoring other people's logic, but honestly, no one else is in my shoes. And everyone comes from a perspective from their own life experiences which may cloud their judgement whereas my situation is not like what they have experienced. And obviously people here don't have the full story of us, don't know me or him, that's why I bother to clarify or explain more where I think people don't get the whole picture. Sue me. Their opinion can stay the same, but at least it would be an informed opinion, not an assumption based on their own negative experiences or how they think people are, because we are all different. That is why I asked for astrological viewpoints. But thanks for your opinion.
Posted by jeaneYeah that's possible. I've never been married so I just assumed the first year is roses and rainbows and that the struggle starts when the endorphins wear off after a few years.Posted by sole2You're overthinking everything.
I am honestly just scared.
I'm scared he does have the right intentions towards me. And he leaves his wife and we get back together, but he would have changed in the last 3 years in ways I couldn't live with. Then I would have ruined a marriage for nothing. I have promised myself that I will never ask him to leave her. It has to be his own choice independent of me. But I am also scared that he delays it and then they have kids and we'd never be able to be together again.
I am scared that this is his ways. If we were together and had problems he'd run off to someone else and not fix us, like he seems to be doing with his wife. The logical thing here is that he works things out in his less than 1 year marriage than to try to work things out with an ex on a different continent. But logic tells me this marriage is going to end whether I am in the picture or not because how can you be miserable longing for an ex (or memory) barely a year into a fresh marriage. Before the wedding he did tell me he was stressed out but i assumed it was just wedding jitters.
But what if this is just a fluke and he genuinely regrets and we would be happy together finally. I know right now I'm 70% willing to pack up my life for him.
But I'm also scared if I walk away now because of all of the above, id spend not 4 years, but the redt of my life wondering and regretting. Im a pisces, I don't love easily but when I do I struggle to move on.
I'm a Virgo moon so I am thinking of all the possible outcomes (he's Virgo moon too). And it is overwhelming whether to know to trust my pisces intuition or my Virgo rationality. Pisces intuition is 'he's the one and is worth the risk'. Virgo logic says this is a mess that can't end well.
You haven't even seen each other yet, not met for 4 years, he lives in another country and he's married.
His intentions if anything is to use you as a distraction. He's dealing with the daily grind. The first year of marriage is hard. Why not indulge in a bit of harmless flirting away from reality as a way to make yourself feel better?
click to expand
Posted by DolluxxePosted by tizianiOnly a Libra can pull that off. Lmao
Without trying to step on what you feel is your connection, the way you write about him comes across as if you do not know much about each other at all. And if you don't know we definitely do not.
At this point the most it sounds like is he hit you with one of the most creative euphemisms for sex I've read
'close a loop and unknown fate that lies ahead'.click to expand
Hahahahaha that must mean I'm amazing in bed if he'd want to have an affair across continents— Thanks for the ego boost guys
But he thinks of himself as a poet. He's very romantic and corny and sappy. Sometimes it gets a bit much and cringey even for me, and I'm a pisces. He's very in touch with his feminine side. When we met online and he came to visit me for the first time (flying 10 hours on a $ 1000 plane ticket) he called it his literal and figurative 'leap of faith'. And yeah the sex was amazing....he's those guys who gets turned on and happy by pleasing his partner first.
Posted by sole2Posted by jeaneYeah that's possible. I've never been married so I just assumed the first year is roses and rainbows and that the struggle starts when the endorphins wear off after a few years.Posted by sole2You're overthinking everything.
I am honestly just scared.
I'm scared he does have the right intentions towards me. And he leaves his wife and we get back together, but he would have changed in the last 3 years in ways I couldn't live with. Then I would have ruined a marriage for nothing. I have promised myself that I will never ask him to leave her. It has to be his own choice independent of me. But I am also scared that he delays it and then they have kids and we'd never be able to be together again.
I am scared that this is his ways. If we were together and had problems he'd run off to someone else and not fix us, like he seems to be doing with his wife. The logical thing here is that he works things out in his less than 1 year marriage than to try to work things out with an ex on a different continent. But logic tells me this marriage is going to end whether I am in the picture or not because how can you be miserable longing for an ex (or memory) barely a year into a fresh marriage. Before the wedding he did tell me he was stressed out but i assumed it was just wedding jitters.
But what if this is just a fluke and he genuinely regrets and we would be happy together finally. I know right now I'm 70% willing to pack up my life for him.
But I'm also scared if I walk away now because of all of the above, id spend not 4 years, but the redt of my life wondering and regretting. Im a pisces, I don't love easily but when I do I struggle to move on.
I'm a Virgo moon so I am thinking of all the possible outcomes (he's Virgo moon too). And it is overwhelming whether to know to trust my pisces intuition or my Virgo rationality. Pisces intuition is 'he's the one and is worth the risk'. Virgo logic says this is a mess that can't end well.
You haven't even seen each other yet, not met for 4 years, he lives in another country and he's married.
His intentions if anything is to use you as a distraction. He's dealing with the daily grind. The first year of marriage is hard. Why not indulge in a bit of harmless flirting away from reality as a way to make yourself feel better?
click to expand
The struggle starts pretty soon when you discover you are looking at the rest of your life with this person and trying to combine lives after the distraction of the wedding has passed. Now it's just the future, day after day, for years to come laid out before you.
https://www.brides.com/story/the-first-year-of-marriage-is-tough
And libras are fuckers. We are ready to fly the coop when shit gets hard. Do I really want this? Did I make the right decision? What if I am wasting my time on the wrong choice? Fucking fomo.
Maybe I've given the wrong impression about him here focusing on the negatives.
The reason I can't get over him is because he is so different from all other men I have been with. He's a sensitive person and is not afraid to show it. He was never afraid to be vulnerable with me. He is a big muscular guy, but he is so soft inside. He is an emotional person, despite all his air and earth in his chart. He is kind hearted and generous, and very family oriented. I know how an awful man behaves and makes you feel, he is not it. The problem is that he is overly rational and chooses practicality over happiness.
An excerpt from our astro compatibility
The love you feel for each other has a particularly sweet, romantic quality that draws the two of you together. You evoke the tender side of each other, and you simply love doing things for each other and giving gifts to one another. Your love for each other is very strong. Because you care for each other so much, you can also hurt each other's feelings rather easily.
You have a strong intuitive and psychic rapport, and you often sense what is on each other's minds well before any words are spoken. You also enjoy discussing topics that have a strong imaginative or mystical element, such as the arts, music, religion, etc.
There is a great deal of mutual trustworthiness, reliability, and responsibility in this relationship that makes you both feel very secure with each other. You can count on each other, and you both take the relationship seriously. You willingly make sacrifices for each other, and a deep love between you develops over time. You will assist each other a great deal over the years. This is likely to be a deep, meaningful, lasting relationship.
There is a sweet, romantic quality to your relationship that makes it special for both of you. You feel very comfortable with each other and are likely to be friends, and perhaps lovers as well, for a very long time.
The reason I can't get over him is because he is so different from all other men I have been with. He's a sensitive person and is not afraid to show it. He was never afraid to be vulnerable with me. He is a big muscular guy, but he is so soft inside. He is an emotional person, despite all his air and earth in his chart. He is kind hearted and generous, and very family oriented. I know how an awful man behaves and makes you feel, he is not it. The problem is that he is overly rational and chooses practicality over happiness.
An excerpt from our astro compatibility
The love you feel for each other has a particularly sweet, romantic quality that draws the two of you together. You evoke the tender side of each other, and you simply love doing things for each other and giving gifts to one another. Your love for each other is very strong. Because you care for each other so much, you can also hurt each other's feelings rather easily.
You have a strong intuitive and psychic rapport, and you often sense what is on each other's minds well before any words are spoken. You also enjoy discussing topics that have a strong imaginative or mystical element, such as the arts, music, religion, etc.
There is a great deal of mutual trustworthiness, reliability, and responsibility in this relationship that makes you both feel very secure with each other. You can count on each other, and you both take the relationship seriously. You willingly make sacrifices for each other, and a deep love between you develops over time. You will assist each other a great deal over the years. This is likely to be a deep, meaningful, lasting relationship.
There is a sweet, romantic quality to your relationship that makes it special for both of you. You feel very comfortable with each other and are likely to be friends, and perhaps lovers as well, for a very long time.
Posted by jeaneThanks for the link!Posted by sole2Posted by jeaneYeah that's possible. I've never been married so I just assumed the first year is roses and rainbows and that the struggle starts when the endorphins wear off after a few years.Posted by sole2You're overthinking everything.
I am honestly just scared.
I'm scared he does have the right intentions towards me. And he leaves his wife and we get back together, but he would have changed in the last 3 years in ways I couldn't live with. Then I would have ruined a marriage for nothing. I have promised myself that I will never ask him to leave her. It has to be his own choice independent of me. But I am also scared that he delays it and then they have kids and we'd never be able to be together again.
I am scared that this is his ways. If we were together and had problems he'd run off to someone else and not fix us, like he seems to be doing with his wife. The logical thing here is that he works things out in his less than 1 year marriage than to try to work things out with an ex on a different continent. But logic tells me this marriage is going to end whether I am in the picture or not because how can you be miserable longing for an ex (or memory) barely a year into a fresh marriage. Before the wedding he did tell me he was stressed out but i assumed it was just wedding jitters.
But what if this is just a fluke and he genuinely regrets and we would be happy together finally. I know right now I'm 70% willing to pack up my life for him.
But I'm also scared if I walk away now because of all of the above, id spend not 4 years, but the redt of my life wondering and regretting. Im a pisces, I don't love easily but when I do I struggle to move on.
I'm a Virgo moon so I am thinking of all the possible outcomes (he's Virgo moon too). And it is overwhelming whether to know to trust my pisces intuition or my Virgo rationality. Pisces intuition is 'he's the one and is worth the risk'. Virgo logic says this is a mess that can't end well.
You haven't even seen each other yet, not met for 4 years, he lives in another country and he's married.
His intentions if anything is to use you as a distraction. He's dealing with the daily grind. The first year of marriage is hard. Why not indulge in a bit of harmless flirting away from reality as a way to make yourself feel better?
The struggle starts pretty soon when you discover you are looking at the rest of your life with this person and trying to combine lives after the distraction of the wedding has passed. Now it's just the future, day after day, for years to come laid out before you.
https://www.brides.com/story/the-first-year-of-marriage-is-tough
And libras are fuckers. We are ready to fly the coop when shit gets hard. Do I really want this? Did I make the right decision? What if I am wasting my time on the wrong choice? Fucking fomo.
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hahaha yeah I realised that about libras. I agree what you said, I am over-thinking things. I really was determined to get over him this year because I think the reason I can't have a happy relationship with someone else is because I never really got over him and so I'm not attracting other nice men because I've told myself he's the best out there for me. I really just want to be happy. When he got married I resigned myself to spending the rest of my life without someone I love a lot and that he was happier with someone else. It felt like accepting half of a life. Before that I always thought that when conditions in my life were better, and I was able to fulfill the promises I made to him, then I'd be able to fight for him and follow through on fixing the things I hurt him with. Hearing that he is not so happy after all gave me back hope.
Until he says the words 'I'm getting a divorce and I want you back' then I'm continuing moving on.
Posted by TimonYep. He has never said he is leaving his wife and I've never asked him too.
He is married so there is no point entertaining the idea of you two together or think about what if. It will only end badly. If he isn't happy in his marriage that is something he needs to address by himself. You shouldn't have any part in it.
Maybe he still have feelings for you, maybe he doesn't but none of it changes the fact that he is still married.
I know he is not good at acting, whether it is a good or bad emotion, his actions always show how he feels. He's just not the kind of guy who is able to behave something he doesn't feel. That's why I do believe he really does still feel something for me. I just wanted libra feedback on whether I should cut him off or give it time (but still being cautious and weary) to see if he will actually do something about what he feels.
Posted by TotiIt would have been kinder of you to explain your situation and why you think they are the same and so I'd have a same outcome as you. Your originally message was too emotional and borderline aggressive and very judgmental. At least now you are being honest it is based off your own experience and preconceived ideas ~shrug~ Sorry if you've had a bad experience, but your message did feel like it was coming from a place of negativity and anger more than compassion towards me at least.Posted by sole2I've been in the same situation as you and I would not want anyone through the something similar. He doesn't love you. That's a simple truth. Take me is judgmental or whatever, I don't care.Posted by Toti
Both are living in fantasy land of what they hope things will become. Why coming here if you will stubbornly defend your opinion? Do what you want. Do as you like. No amount of logic and common sense people display here will help you because you are more than willing to crash with him. Men know women well. Especially women they had some contact with. He knows you are always going to be available. He knows that if he tells you a couple of sweet words now that for the next five years you will wait for him. That's not what you should bring. He is MARRIED. No matter how unhappy he might be, that's his problem not yours. Let him solve his problem first and not use you for his ego boost. You are 32. Yes, we make decisions based on many things and not love only. He has made his decisions twice not including you. I don't know how you can't see that. It has nothing to do with a specific zodiac sign. It has to do with respect. A man doesn't respect you nor his newly wedded wife. What makes you think the two of you would live a fairytale when you don't even know each other.
Ummm you have so many things wrong here.
I clearly am not living in a fantasy land or expect a fairytale ending, hence my earlier post that I have considered all possible outcomes, not just the one I am hoping for.
He knows I have been with other men, I have had a serious relationship after him where I almost got engaged. So he knows I have moved on before, even still loving him, and I will do it again if I have to. Did I not move on for 4 years and live my life? I haven't been sitting around waiting for him. I have an awesome social life, good friends, and a fulfilling career and a good income. I don't need him for anything. I want him. And a want can go unfulfilled and one will still be okay.
I KNOW he is married. Hence I've made it clear that I am not going to ask him to leave his wife, it is his issue as that was his choice. In fact, I made it clear that I fear him leaving his wife in the event me and him don't work out if he does leave her for me.
And many people walk away from relationships only to regret and come back later. Me and him are not some weird case. So yeah, he did not choose me when we broke up. OBVIOUSLY that broke my heart. I cannot be heartbroken about something I am unaware of 🙂
You seem to think life & people are black and white. You have no awareness that people are complicated. That sometimes we do things that are not good for us, or things that we know not to do. It is not impossible that he did not choose me but has chosen relationships after me that were not happy and unfulfilling, but were practical and logical. He is a libra after all.
Your judgmental tone makes me think you are perfect, that you have never hurt someone, or that you have never been hurt, that you have never had a regret. And I don't think anyone is thaaaat perfect. I'm not looking for judgmental opinions here, or people talking to me like I'm stupid. I'm looking for human beings who even if they can't understand or relate, can help me think this through. Perhaps I come across as sticking to my opinion and ignoring other people's logic, but honestly, no one else is in my shoes. And everyone comes from a perspective from their own life experiences which may cloud their judgement whereas my situation is not like what they have experienced. And obviously people here don't have the full story of us, don't know me or him, that's why I bother to clarify or explain more where I think people don't get the whole picture. Sue me. Their opinion can stay the same, but at least it would be an informed opinion, not an assumption based on their own negative experiences or how they think people are, because we are all different. That is why I asked for astrological viewpoints. But thanks for your opinion.
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Posted by TimonYeah I am not involved. I haven't asked him for anything or made any plans. I was more looking for, 'as a libra....this is how I understand his behaviour based on myself and my motivations/feelings in such a situation'. I'm not looking for life advice. I already know what I'm going to do, I'm not stupid. I'm just looking to hear from libras' own EXPERIENCES & FEELINGS (not opinions) on their behavior/motivations, etc.Posted by sole2I'm a libra. You should back off for your own sake. If he is miserable in his marriage it's his choice to do something about it. Don't get involved.Posted by TimonYep. He has never said he is leaving his wife and I've never asked him too.
He is married so there is no point entertaining the idea of you two together or think about what if. It will only end badly. If he isn't happy in his marriage that is something he needs to address by himself. You shouldn't have any part in it.
Maybe he still have feelings for you, maybe he doesn't but none of it changes the fact that he is still married.
I know he is not good at acting, whether it is a good or bad emotion, his actions always show how he feels. He's just not the kind of guy who is able to behave something he doesn't feel. That's why I do believe he really does still feel something for me. I just wanted libra feedback on whether I should cut him off or give it time (but still being cautious and weary) to see if he will actually do something about what he feels.
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I haven't really gotten that except from the other libra lady where she explained libra indecisiveness and doubt about their choices - it is that kind of insight I need. This whole thread has become about me defending and explaining myself ~shrug~ about to delete it coz it is not what I was looking for.
Posted by TimonYep I should have. It just feels like everyone is stating the obvious 'that he is married don't get your hopes up'. I assumed it was implied I wanted astrology feedback, that's why I posted in the libra forum. Years ago when I first started using this site people would do that, even ask for the whole chart, do compatibility and forecast analysis, look at transits etc. Don't know what changed, but that's how it was. Seems it is more of a 'let's tell this stupid girl she is stupid for loving someone' attitude from most responses. Which makes people come across as actually unhappy people. Just saying.Posted by sole2Well you should have written that in the first post. I never accused you of anything. 😛Posted by TimonYeah I am not involved. I haven't asked him for anything or made any plans. I was more looking for, 'as a libra....this is how I understand his behaviour based on myself and my motivations/feelings in such a situation'. I'm not looking for life advice. I already know what I'm going to do, I'm not stupid. I'm just looking to hear from libras' own EXPERIENCES & FEELINGS (not opinions) on their behavior/motivations, etc.Posted by sole2I'm a libra. You should back off for your own sake. If he is miserable in his marriage it's his choice to do something about it. Don't get involved.Posted by TimonYep. He has never said he is leaving his wife and I've never asked him too.
He is married so there is no point entertaining the idea of you two together or think about what if. It will only end badly. If he isn't happy in his marriage that is something he needs to address by himself. You shouldn't have any part in it.
Maybe he still have feelings for you, maybe he doesn't but none of it changes the fact that he is still married.
I know he is not good at acting, whether it is a good or bad emotion, his actions always show how he feels. He's just not the kind of guy who is able to behave something he doesn't feel. That's why I do believe he really does still feel something for me. I just wanted libra feedback on whether I should cut him off or give it time (but still being cautious and weary) to see if he will actually do something about what he feels.
I haven't really gotten that except from the other libra lady where she explained libra indecisiveness and doubt about their choices - it is that kind of insight I need. This whole thread has become about me defending and explaining myself ~shrug~ about to delete it coz it is not what I was looking for.
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Posted by GanonUmm this is my life, for you just a thread. Ffs I'm not up for your dare but thanks:pPosted by sole2How about moral viewpoints?Posted by Toti
Both are living in fantasy land of what they hope things will become. Why coming here if you will stubbornly defend your opinion? Do what you want. Do as you like. No amount of logic and common sense people display here will help you because you are more than willing to crash with him. Men know women well. Especially women they had some contact with. He knows you are always going to be available. He knows that if he tells you a couple of sweet words now that for the next five years you will wait for him. That's not what you should bring. He is MARRIED. No matter how unhappy he might be, that's his problem not yours. Let him solve his problem first and not use you for his ego boost. You are 32. Yes, we make decisions based on many things and not love only. He has made his decisions twice not including you. I don't know how you can't see that. It has nothing to do with a specific zodiac sign. It has to do with respect. A man doesn't respect you nor his newly wedded wife. What makes you think the two of you would live a fairytale when you don't even know each other.
Ummm you have so many things wrong here.
I clearly am not living in a fantasy land or expect a fairytale ending, hence my earlier post that I have considered all possible outcomes, not just the one I am hoping for.
He knows I have been with other men, I have had a serious relationship after him where I almost got engaged. So he knows I have moved on before, even still loving him, and I will do it again if I have to. Did I not move on for 4 years and live my life? I haven't been sitting around waiting for him. I have an awesome social life, good friends, and a fulfilling career and a good income. I don't need him for anything. I want him. And a want can go unfulfilled and one will still be okay.
I KNOW he is married. Hence I've made it clear that I am not going to ask him to leave his wife, it is his issue as that was his choice. In fact, I made it clear that I fear him leaving his wife in the event me and him don't work out if he does leave her for me.
And many people walk away from relationships only to regret and come back later. Me and him are not some weird case. So yeah, he did not choose me when we broke up. OBVIOUSLY that broke my heart. I cannot be heartbroken about something I am unaware of 🙂
You seem to think life & people are black and white. You have no awareness that people are complicated. That sometimes we do things that are not good for us, or things that we know not to do. It is not impossible that he did not choose me but has chosen relationships after me that were not happy and unfulfilling, but were practical and logical. He is a libra after all.
Your judgmental tone makes me think you are perfect, that you have never hurt someone, or that you have never been hurt, that you have never had a regret. And I don't think anyone is thaaaat perfect. I'm not looking for judgmental opinions here, or people talking to me like I'm stupid. I'm looking for human beings who even if they can't understand or relate, can help me think this through. Perhaps I come across as sticking to my opinion and ignoring other people's logic, but honestly, no one else is in my shoes. And everyone comes from a perspective from their own life experiences which may cloud their judgement whereas my situation is not like what they have experienced. And obviously people here don't have the full story of us, don't know me or him, that's why I bother to clarify or explain more where I think people don't get the whole picture. Sue me. Their opinion can stay the same, but at least it would be an informed opinion, not an assumption based on their own negative experiences or how they think people are, because we are all different. That is why I asked for astrological viewpoints. But thanks for your opinion.
And don't fool yourself (cause you certainly don't fool us) The moment you told this married man you loved him you had already decided to try and break up his marriage.
I dare you to ask him if he ever would be willing to leave his wife and then come again and tell us his reaction.
You'll be here on DXP crying...how he led you on..
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Yes, please leave this thread. You have made no insightful or valuable contribution. You dont know a thing about me. Talking about morals hahahaha I am not the one who is married and writing an ex. He is. He was the one messaging me. He opened the door for me to be honest. If bring honest about my feelings means I am destroying a marriage then no one should be getting married if it is so easy to make people get divorced.
Posted by GanonPosted by sole2Posted by GanonUmm this is my life, for you just a thread. Ffs I'm not up for your dare but thanks:pPosted by sole2How about moral viewpoints?Posted by Toti
Both are living in fantasy land of what they hope things will become. Why coming here if you will stubbornly defend your opinion? Do what you want. Do as you like. No amount of logic and common sense people display here will help you because you are more than willing to crash with him. Men know women well. Especially women they had some contact with. He knows you are always going to be available. He knows that if he tells you a couple of sweet words now that for the next five years you will wait for him. That's not what you should bring. He is MARRIED. No matter how unhappy he might be, that's his problem not yours. Let him solve his problem first and not use you for his ego boost. You are 32. Yes, we make decisions based on many things and not love only. He has made his decisions twice not including you. I don't know how you can't see that. It has nothing to do with a specific zodiac sign. It has to do with respect. A man doesn't respect you nor his newly wedded wife. What makes you think the two of you would live a fairytale when you don't even know each other.
Ummm you have so many things wrong here.
I clearly am not living in a fantasy land or expect a fairytale ending, hence my earlier post that I have considered all possible outcomes, not just the one I am hoping for.
He knows I have been with other men, I have had a serious relationship after him where I almost got engaged. So he knows I have moved on before, even still loving him, and I will do it again if I have to. Did I not move on for 4 years and live my life? I haven't been sitting around waiting for him. I have an awesome social life, good friends, and a fulfilling career and a good income. I don't need him for anything. I want him. And a want can go unfulfilled and one will still be okay.
I KNOW he is married. Hence I've made it clear that I am not going to ask him to leave his wife, it is his issue as that was his choice. In fact, I made it clear that I fear him leaving his wife in the event me and him don't work out if he does leave her for me.
And many people walk away from relationships only to regret and come back later. Me and him are not some weird case. So yeah, he did not choose me when we broke up. OBVIOUSLY that broke my heart. I cannot be heartbroken about something I am unaware of 🙂
You seem to think life & people are black and white. You have no awareness that people are complicated. That sometimes we do things that are not good for us, or things that we know not to do. It is not impossible that he did not choose me but has chosen relationships after me that were not happy and unfulfilling, but were practical and logical. He is a libra after all.
Your judgmental tone makes me think you are perfect, that you have never hurt someone, or that you have never been hurt, that you have never had a regret. And I don't think anyone is thaaaat perfect. I'm not looking for judgmental opinions here, or people talking to me like I'm stupid. I'm looking for human beings who even if they can't understand or relate, can help me think this through. Perhaps I come across as sticking to my opinion and ignoring other people's logic, but honestly, no one else is in my shoes. And everyone comes from a perspective from their own life experiences which may cloud their judgement whereas my situation is not like what they have experienced. And obviously people here don't have the full story of us, don't know me or him, that's why I bother to clarify or explain more where I think people don't get the whole picture. Sue me. Their opinion can stay the same, but at least it would be an informed opinion, not an assumption based on their own negative experiences or how they think people are, because we are all different. That is why I asked for astrological viewpoints. But thanks for your opinion.
And don't fool yourself (cause you certainly don't fool us) The moment you told this married man you loved him you had already decided to try and break up his marriage.
I dare you to ask him if he ever would be willing to leave his wife and then come again and tell us his reaction.
You'll be here on DXP crying...how he led you on..
*Yes, please leave this thread. You have made no insightful or valuable contribution. You dont know a thing about me.
-Well i know you're a hypocrite!
Years ago you were here on DXP sobbing, butthurt and all, how your Sag ex disrespected/hurt you because he had inappropiate contact with a woman online.
Yet here you are doing the exact same thing to another woman's husband.
^*Talking about morals hahahaha I am not the one who is married and writing an ex. He is.
- Like i said you have no integrity!
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Well it's starting to look like you have something personal against me, looking into my past to pull up things you think will discredit me.
The sag turned out to be abusive. You don't see me crying about him anymore though. But thanks for bringing up memories of an abusive boyfriend.
When the libra told me he is getting married I cut off communication for about 7 months. My best friend told me to fight for him, stop him getting married. I said no. Im not going to ruin his or his fiancees big day or marriage with my drama. I accepted my hurt and loss and didn't interfere. So actually, I do have morals.
He opened the door,and my message to him was basically, 'I still love and miss you. Im sad to have lost you forever. But I don't want to interfere in your new marriage so I am just telling you this to get it off my chest finally. I wish you happiness'. My message was actually a final good bye. He is the one who now sends me messages updating me about important things in his life, wanting to talk about our issues more. And I welcome it because I suffered trying not to ruin his marriage. And if him talking through things we never had closure on is us having low morals, so be it if they are generally happy together, him also working through his issues should be good for them too.
My sag ex was just a cheater and looking for casualnsex with other women. Totally different context. Like I said, you don't know me. I thought you were leaving this thread?
Posted by GanonPosted by sole2I'm gonna ask you to stop the pity party rn (i'm not impressed)Posted by GanonPosted by sole2Posted by GanonUmm this is my life, for you just a thread. Ffs I'm not up for your dare but thanks:pPosted by sole2How about moral viewpoints?Posted by Toti
Both are living in fantasy land of what they hope things will become. Why coming here if you will stubbornly defend your opinion? Do what you want. Do as you like. No amount of logic and common sense people display here will help you because you are more than willing to crash with him. Men know women well. Especially women they had some contact with. He knows you are always going to be available. He knows that if he tells you a couple of sweet words now that for the next five years you will wait for him. That's not what you should bring. He is MARRIED. No matter how unhappy he might be, that's his problem not yours. Let him solve his problem first and not use you for his ego boost. You are 32. Yes, we make decisions based on many things and not love only. He has made his decisions twice not including you. I don't know how you can't see that. It has nothing to do with a specific zodiac sign. It has to do with respect. A man doesn't respect you nor his newly wedded wife. What makes you think the two of you would live a fairytale when you don't even know each other.
Ummm you have so many things wrong here.
I clearly am not living in a fantasy land or expect a fairytale ending, hence my earlier post that I have considered all possible outcomes, not just the one I am hoping for.
He knows I have been with other men, I have had a serious relationship after him where I almost got engaged. So he knows I have moved on before, even still loving him, and I will do it again if I have to. Did I not move on for 4 years and live my life? I haven't been sitting around waiting for him. I have an awesome social life, good friends, and a fulfilling career and a good income. I don't need him for anything. I want him. And a want can go unfulfilled and one will still be okay.
I KNOW he is married. Hence I've made it clear that I am not going to ask him to leave his wife, it is his issue as that was his choice. In fact, I made it clear that I fear him leaving his wife in the event me and him don't work out if he does leave her for me.
And many people walk away from relationships only to regret and come back later. Me and him are not some weird case. So yeah, he did not choose me when we broke up. OBVIOUSLY that broke my heart. I cannot be heartbroken about something I am unaware of 🙂
You seem to think life & people are black and white. You have no awareness that people are complicated. That sometimes we do things that are not good for us, or things that we know not to do. It is not impossible that he did not choose me but has chosen relationships after me that were not happy and unfulfilling, but were practical and logical. He is a libra after all.
Your judgmental tone makes me think you are perfect, that you have never hurt someone, or that you have never been hurt, that you have never had a regret. And I don't think anyone is thaaaat perfect. I'm not looking for judgmental opinions here, or people talking to me like I'm stupid. I'm looking for human beings who even if they can't understand or relate, can help me think this through. Perhaps I come across as sticking to my opinion and ignoring other people's logic, but honestly, no one else is in my shoes. And everyone comes from a perspective from their own life experiences which may cloud their judgement whereas my situation is not like what they have experienced. And obviously people here don't have the full story of us, don't know me or him, that's why I bother to clarify or explain more where I think people don't get the whole picture. Sue me. Their opinion can stay the same, but at least it would be an informed opinion, not an assumption based on their own negative experiences or how they think people are, because we are all different. That is why I asked for astrological viewpoints. But thanks for your opinion.
And don't fool yourself (cause you certainly don't fool us) The moment you told this married man you loved him you had already decided to try and break up his marriage.
I dare you to ask him if he ever would be willing to leave his wife and then come again and tell us his reaction.
You'll be here on DXP crying...how he led you on..
*Yes, please leave this thread. You have made no insightful or valuable contribution. You dont know a thing about me.
-Well i know you're a hypocrite!
Years ago you were here on DXP sobbing, butthurt and all, how your Sag ex disrespected/hurt you because he had inappropiate contact with a woman online.
Yet here you are doing the exact same thing to another woman's husband.
^*Talking about morals hahahaha I am not the one who is married and writing an ex. He is.
- Like i said you have no integrity!
Well it's starting to look like you have something personal against me, looking into my past to pull up things you think will discredit me.
The sag turned out to be abusive. You don't see me crying about him anymore though. But thanks for bringing up memories of an abusive boyfriend.
When the libra told me he is getting married I cut off communication for about 7 months. My best friend told me to fight for him, stop him getting married. I said no. Im not going to ruin his or his fiancees big day or marriage with my drama. I accepted my hurt and loss and didn't interfere. So actually, I do have morals.
He opened the door,and my message to him was basically, 'I still love and miss you. Im sad to have lost you forever. But I don't want to interfere in your new marriage so I am just telling you this to get it off my chest finally. I wish you happiness'. My message was actually a final good bye. He is the one who now sends me messages updating me about important things in his life, wanting to talk about our issues more. And I welcome it because I suffered trying not to ruin his marriage. And if him talking through things we never had closure on is us having low morals, so be it if they are generally happy together, him also working through his issues should be good for them too.
My sag ex was just a cheater and looking for casualnsex with other women. Totally different context. Like I said, you don't know me. I thought you were leaving this thread?
It isn't personal. But I am repulsed by home wreckers who hover around like vultures, lookin for cracks and weak spots in marriages in order to slide in and do their damage. Just like you are trying to do now.
I'm sorry that your ex abused you but i had to bring your past experience up as a reminder of the hypocrisy (hopefully knock some sense into your head).
You have your morals and ethics all upside down. You should've fought for him while he was single and not when he's married. You know this.
Telling him how much you still love him and can't forget him after he send you a text at 2AM??
Woman...stop fronting! I'm not even gonna dignify that with a response!
So you think i'm trying to discredit you huh?
At least you realise that your actions are wrong. There's hope for you.
And now i can leave the thread in peace. Peace!
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You're all wrong. But you are clearly just looking for a fight/trolling. You're a really angry person, looking to insert yourself in a thread where you can skip over many facts to look for a way to criticise/judge/lecture me. Sounds like you are a perfect person in a perfect world, so what are you doing here? Your false opinion doesn't affect the price of bread honey. You're totally inconsequential to me no matter how much you twist things or try to be hurtful to make me seem like a bad or immoral person. Work on yourself before seeking out opportunities to take out your frustrations on others. Your high horse antics aren't going to make me do what you want. Nor do I have time for angry bitter people like you. I wish you all the best but that's the second time you said you are leaving but you are still trying to bait me. I don't need to explain or justify myself to you at all. I gave you the benefit of the doubt but you are still coming for me after you said you'd leave and I'm really hoping you are really leaving this time.
You accuse me of being a bad person,but you repeatedly trying to reach into my past to pull up things that you don't have the full story to in order to be 'right' more than being kind and helpful is what makes the world a cold hard place. Call yourself moral more than me, but you are not a good person.
I can't stand people who would choose to be hurtful to prove a point to someone they don't even know. Clearly you are an unhappy person and don't have more important things to do with your life. I don't come on here and attack people in order to make them look or feel bad to make them fit into what I think they should be doing. You being hurtful is bot persuading me of your rightness or that I should listen to you. Try a different tactic when engaging with people hun, even if you think they are wrong. Here you are unnecessarily reminding me of an abusive relationship that put me through hell just so you can be right and make me appear to be what you think I am based on your own personal experiences, clearly. You come off as a really angry and bitter person and it's not attractive or encouraging me to listen to any thing you say, even if you were right.
Posted by Mr_PinchyDAMNNNN...
Woman, your dying eggs are trying to rush you into bad decisions.
You have a quitter on your hands, things don’t run smoothly and get too hard and he quits. He’s got himself in deep by actually getting married and that commitment alone takes a lot more to get out of without a firm reason to give to his wife and family... if it wasn’t you, he’d find another. Look back at his life, bet he quits all the time whether it is relationships, jobs, path of choice, he can’t and doesn’t stick much out past a year or two.
Go ahead, be the reason he walks away from his marriage. Tell yourself whatever you need to, to make yourself feel better but guarantee you’ll be in a similar position when he quits you too!
Go ahead, be the reason he walks away from his marriage. Tell yourself whatever you need to, to make yourself feel better but guarantee you’ll be in a similar position when he quits you too!
Posted by GanonYou are entitled to your opinion and delivery. You're totally wrong about me. You're not for me though. Perhaps find someone else to attack. Or just find something better to do with your life. By the way, Im a human rights worker, so I consider mysely to be a good person who cares for people. I've dedicated my life to fighting for justice and what is right. You don't know me. You take care.Posted by sole2The way your mind works is baffling to me.
I can't stand people who would choose to be hurtful to prove a point to someone they don't even know. Clearly you are an unhappy person and don't have more important things to do with your life. I don't come on here and attack people in order to make them look or feel bad to make them fit into what I think they should be doing. You being hurtful is bot persuading me of your rightness or that I should listen to you. Try a different tactic when engaging with people hun, even if you think they are wrong. Here you are unnecessarily reminding me of an abusive relationship that put me through hell just so you can be right and make me appear to be what you think I am based on your own personal experiences, clearly. You come off as a really angry and bitter person and it's not attractive or encouraging me to listen to any thing you say, even if you were right.
You expect kindness and compassion from an internet stranger who comments on your thread?
How about kindness and compassion and respect for the woman's whose marriage you are trying to disrupt?
(And i say disrupt because he won't leave her for you...he just wants his fantasy again, you'll just cause a wave)
Angry? No ma'am. Repulsed? Yes!
But at the same time i feel sorry for you (You're setting yourself up for heartache again)
I'm not trying to be hurtful nor am i trying to tell you how to live your life.
I'm simply giving you my harsh, blunt opinion which is based on the facts presented by you in this thread.
But i guess the truth hurts.
Carry on with the delusions and the immorality if you choose.
And if you really want me to leave this thread stop quoting me.
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Posted by sweethearts
You have a quitter on your hands, things don’t run smoothly and get too hard and he quits. He’s got himself in deep by actually getting married and that commitment alone takes a lot more to get out of without a firm reason to give to his wife and family... if it wasn’t you, he’d find another. Look back at his life, bet he quits all the time whether it is relationships, jobs, path of choice, he can’t and doesn’t stick much out past a year or two.
Go ahead, be the reason he walks away from his marriage. Tell yourself whatever you need to, to make yourself feel better but guarantee you’ll be in a similar position when he quits you too!
Before he was with me he had a 4 year relationship with a woman from a different culture and conservative background and they had to be secret the whole time. He didn't give up then.
Posted by TotiBut she went ahead and called me immoral. That's very personal no matter how you spin it. She also called me a hypocrite by referencing an ex of mine who was a serial cheater and abuser. I don't know how I'm supposed to think that is a nice thing or not a personal attack. It was very hurtful and hit below the belt.Posted by sole2If you read this thread carefully you will notice that there is no hate, judgment, personal attacks,etc involved here. Only common sense. You are blinded. You want to see what you want to see. You didn't post his chart here to ask astrological question. You displayed your story and asked about a Libra. That's a very broad notion. You wanted someone to confirm how he is still in love with you and the fact nobody did makes you confrontational and defensive. Nobody here wants to harm you. But you are harming yourself. If you don't want anything with a married man then you don't tell him that you love him, even if you are doing for him. Respect the sacred union he created with another woman.
I can't stand people who would choose to be hurtful to prove a point to someone they don't even know. Clearly you are an unhappy person and don't have more important things to do with your life. I don't come on here and attack people in order to make them look or feel bad to make them fit into what I think they should be doing. You being hurtful is bot persuading me of your rightness or that I should listen to you. Try a different tactic when engaging with people hun, even if you think they are wrong. Here you are unnecessarily reminding me of an abusive relationship that put me through hell just so you can be right and make me appear to be what you think I am based on your own personal experiences, clearly. You come off as a really angry and bitter person and it's not attractive or encouraging me to listen to any thing you say, even if you were right.
If he decides to leave his wife and actually does that, then come back here and ask what to do next. There are some boundaries we shouldn't be crossing. You know nothing about his marriage nor his life. What he told you isn't necessarily truth. You are 32 years old. That requires some emotional stability, maturity and responsibility. The world doesn't revolve around us. His zodiac sign is the minor issue here. There are red flags all over the place, but seems like you only see the rainbows. You have already decided what you are going to do, so go ahead.click to expand
And not once have I ever said I will be part of his marriage not working. I am so sure I made it clear that he needs to figure that out by himself. So why exactly is everyone stating the obvious or berating me to not do something I already said I won't? Clearly people are just on their high horses and not actually listening to me.
Posted by TotiPosted by Senorita_LLPosted by ColdFire17Similarly, it goes to men with Libra moon and venus. I've observed that placements and it scares me the most, the moment I knew someone has that.
Chances are, you're not even the only one and the sad part for you is you will never know. Libra men tend to run when things get hard.
I'm turned off with anything Libra. I, personally hate my Libra mars. :/
Of course, not saying all of them are the same but as for now, I'm avoiding men with those placements. 😬😬
Don't know about the moon but libra Mars and Venus are the worst.
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He is libra sun, Virgo moon, sag venus, cap mars
Posted by Senorita_LLPosted by ColdFire17Similarly, it goes to men with Libra moon and venus. I've observed that placements and it scares me the most, the moment I knew someone has that.
Chances are, you're not even the only one and the sad part for you is you will never know. Libra men tend to run when things get hard.
I'm turned off with anything Libra. I, personally hate my Libra mars. :/
Of course, not saying all of them are the same but as for now, I'm avoiding men with those placements. 😬😬click to expand
senorita, you gave me an idea for a topic. lol
OP, the man is married. why you wanna be homewrecker?
Posted by Senorita_LLit's been done before but it's still interesting lolPosted by lisabethur8Now....what topic is it this time, Lisa? 😬😬😝😝Posted by Senorita_LLPosted by ColdFire17Similarly, it goes to men with Libra moon and venus. I've observed that placements and it scares me the most, the moment I knew someone has that.
Chances are, you're not even the only one and the sad part for you is you will never know. Libra men tend to run when things get hard.
I'm turned off with anything Libra. I, personally hate my Libra mars. :/
Of course, not saying all of them are the same but as for now, I'm avoiding men with those placements. 😬😬
senorita, you gave me an idea for a topic. lol
OP, the man is married. why you wanna be homewrecker?
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https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/relationships-astrology/what-placements-do-you-hate-and--10310106/?checkpg=1
I get along well with libra for some reason. Friends and lovers, most of my best friends gave been libras since I was a teen. Somehow I can put up with their not good sides
Posted by tizianiI feel like this thread is libra bashing. I like libras a lot, friends and lovers. I seem to 'get them'. I love libra intelligence and I think despite the negative sides, libras are generally good people.
OP, on paper I should see where you're coming from.
Most of the conversations about sex and relationships here don't make room for people like me except Libra stereotypes.
-
All that said, I feel the most this could be is someone reaching out for comfort. Everything else about this sounds impractical as hell to me and why I can't relate.
I remember you tiziani, we spoke a lot about libra during my break up with him, I seem to recall you giving great insights.
Posted by sole24 years? Is that all you want from a relationship? That’s a quitter. Seriously you’re making excuses and when you start making up excuses for every action and inaction then that is a huge red flag.Posted by sweethearts
You have a quitter on your hands, things don’t run smoothly and get too hard and he quits. He’s got himself in deep by actually getting married and that commitment alone takes a lot more to get out of without a firm reason to give to his wife and family... if it wasn’t you, he’d find another. Look back at his life, bet he quits all the time whether it is relationships, jobs, path of choice, he can’t and doesn’t stick much out past a year or two.
Go ahead, be the reason he walks away from his marriage. Tell yourself whatever you need to, to make yourself feel better but guarantee you’ll be in a similar position when he quits you too!
Before he was with me he had a 4 year relationship with a woman from a different culture and conservative background and they had to be secret the whole time. He didn't give up then.
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Be true to yourself and read people’s comments without taking offence. They come from all different angles but the majority are saying get out, stay away and your setting yourself up for heartache.
Posted by TimonPosted by sole2Posted by TimonYep I should have. It just feels like everyone is stating the obvious 'that he is married don't get your hopes up'. I assumed it was implied I wanted astrology feedback, that's why I posted in the libra forum. Years ago when I first started using this site people would do that, even ask for the whole chart, do compatibility and forecast analysis, look at transits etc. Don't know what changed, but that's how it was. Seems it is more of a 'let's tell this stupid girl she is stupid for loving someone' attitude from most responses. Which makes people come across as actually unhappy people. Just saying.Posted by sole2Well you should have written that in the first post. I never accused you of anything. 😛Posted by TimonYeah I am not involved. I haven't asked him for anything or made any plans. I was more looking for, 'as a libra....this is how I understand his behaviour based on myself and my motivations/feelings in such a situation'. I'm not looking for life advice. I already know what I'm going to do, I'm not stupid. I'm just looking to hear from libras' own EXPERIENCES & FEELINGS (not opinions) on their behavior/motivations, etc.Posted by sole2I'm a libra. You should back off for your own sake. If he is miserable in his marriage it's his choice to do something about it. Don't get involved.Posted by TimonYep. He has never said he is leaving his wife and I've never asked him too.
He is married so there is no point entertaining the idea of you two together or think about what if. It will only end badly. If he isn't happy in his marriage that is something he needs to address by himself. You shouldn't have any part in it.
Maybe he still have feelings for you, maybe he doesn't but none of it changes the fact that he is still married.
I know he is not good at acting, whether it is a good or bad emotion, his actions always show how he feels. He's just not the kind of guy who is able to behave something he doesn't feel. That's why I do believe he really does still feel something for me. I just wanted libra feedback on whether I should cut him off or give it time (but still being cautious and weary) to see if he will actually do something about what he feels.
I haven't really gotten that except from the other libra lady where she explained libra indecisiveness and doubt about their choices - it is that kind of insight I need. This whole thread has become about me defending and explaining myself ~shrug~ about to delete it coz it is not what I was looking for.
You posted your story and asked people to please help so I responded to that. I don't know about the others but my reply to you was not to tell you that you were stupid.
Ask yourself why you need to understand his intentions? Even if he likes you what good will it do you if he is married.That was my point.
I could see that you were attached to him and I tried to give you an advice that I thought were in your best interest because I didn't think it was healthy for you to be that attached to him. But I guess that wasn't what you were looking for.
And you can't really blame people for sharing their opinions about it because if you didn't want to hear that you should have been more specific about what you were seeking.
You said it yourself that you already know what you're going to do so I guess our advice are pretty useless lol. So let's say he likes you. Now what? What will you do? Wait for him to leave his wife? Try to get over him? What are your plans?
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Ugh I would have posted in an agony aunt forum, not a LIBRA ASTROLOGY forum if I was here for life advice and character assassinations and to defend myself non-stop.
I shouldn't need to tell adults something soooo obvious. If I was asking for people's analysis or judgement of myself and character then I wouldn't have come here.
Thanks. I am aware I am attached to him and I really am trying to come to terms with it because NOTHING has helped me not love him, even not seeing him for 3 years. It is just my reality/situation that I go through my life with and it doesn't even feel painful anymore. It seems actually possible to love someone and want the best for them and not be together. That's what I've been living with for 3 years. So I honestly am not going to make a choice based on a fear of a negative outcome.
I think it is far unhealthier when people are very rigid in not understanding emotional spiritual issues. People here don't seem to understand my experience (not saying agree - saying emphathise/relate). And it's not so much their advice that is not for me, it is a lot of the self righteousness from people who I am 100% sure are not living perfect lives the way they seem to expect me to.
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