STILL IN LOVE

Hi All,

I would've posted this on a general board, but my Libra peeps are fam 🙂 so here it goes.
Basically, I'm still in love with the Aries I used to post about 2 yrs ago. I've dated others, and I even like a Cancer (don't ask me why, because he's a jerk face most of the time). Anyway, I want to be over this Aries once and for all. I know it's a process and all that jazz, and believe me it's an even longer process for me since our families are so close. We keep running into one another.

I feel tension between us. I'm uncomfortable and I'm almost certain he is too, and I just hate it. I really do. My cousins have urged me to talk to him, but my feelings are still pretty raw and the wound from him dropping me for someone else is still pretty fresh I don't want to chance talking to him and he says the wrong thing and I wig out. Aries are blunt, and when i'm hurt so am I, so i'm not sure that will be a good match for talking.

I don't know what to do. Things are going really good in my life right now, and i'm unfazed by this situation until I see him. Deep down, I'm still in love and cant help feeling like I wasn't good enough 😢 . I was just wondering what you girls doe to move forward? Like what do you tell yourself? I'm usually good at these type of things but i'm really in a hurry to let it go. I feel like a complete idiot loving someone that doesn't love me back, ESPECIALLY when there is some new chick on the block. Even though they aren't official, and rumor has it he's still not trying to settle with anyone,I cant fathom another girl. Period. need to let it go and FAST! Thanks for all the help 🙂 Remember I've helped some of you, so if you get snappy or rude, I will light right back into you! Thankies.

Posted by pinklibra
Hi All,

I would've posted this on a general board, but my Libra peeps are fam 🙂 so here it goes.
Basically, I'm still in love with the Aries I used to post about 2 yrs ago. I've dated others, and I even like a Cancer (don't ask me why, because he's a jerk face most of the time). Anyway, I want to be over this Aries once and for all. I know it's a process and all that jazz, and believe me it's an even longer process for me since our families are so close. We keep running into one another.

I feel tension between us. I'm uncomfortable and I'm almost certain he is too, and I just hate it. I really do. My cousins have urged me to talk to him, but my feelings are still pretty raw and the wound from him dropping me for someone else is still pretty fresh I don't want to chance talking to him and he says the wrong thing and I wig out. Aries are blunt, and when i'm hurt so am I, so i'm not sure that will be a good match for talking.

I don't know what to do. Things are going really good in my life right now, and i'm unfazed by this situation until I see him. Deep down, I'm still in love and cant help feeling like I wasn't good enough 😢 . I was just wondering what you girls doe to move forward? Like what do you tell yourself? I'm usually good at these type of things but i'm really in a hurry to let it go. I feel like a complete idiot loving someone that doesn't love me back, ESPECIALLY when there is some new chick on the block. Even though they aren't official, and rumor has it he's still not trying to settle with anyone,I cant fathom another girl. Period. need to let it go and FAST! Thanks for all the help 🙂 Remember I've helped some of you, so if you get snappy or rude, I will light right back into you! Thankies.

The aries was your first love?

Posted by tiziani
You're opposites, so there's always going to be tension even when you have no feelings towards one another.

If you have unfinished business or wounds I would suggest talking with him and getting off your chest what you have to say. As long as it's meaningful.

I have seen too many people take the "at least you still have your dignity" strong, silent, walk off into the night approach...and it makes them bitter. They replace open mindedness with hindsight.

When you confront someone who hurt you and talk it through rationally, it eliminates hindsight. You realize there wasn't anything better you could have both done, you gave it your best shot at the time, it wasn't good enough and then it's cool to move on.

Unfortunately when people don't talk they fill in the blanks with imagination running wild.

+100000000000000000 I completely agree with Tizi. I am personally one for prayer. So to add to what Tiz is saying I would just ask God for you and him to be able to speak your truths and gain understanding with each other without raising your voices, but really listening and gaining understanding from each of you. Also, for yourself pray for a healing for your heart to no longer be hardened. To forgive yourself and forgive him.

you just love his pee

@Housecleaning, I fell in love one year before we even had sex, and I've known the man since I was 7, so get over yourself and grow up. Thanks and keep it moving.

To everyone else, thank you so much. I really appreciate the kind words. I will start back talking to God about it. I'm generally a loving person, I don't like bad energy with me and anyone else especially if I care. I will need to heal myself a bit more before I can be friends with him, but I can see it in the future because i'm not really upset with him right now and I don't hate him or anything. I just want to be over him. That's all.

It's harder for me to get over things when I don't have full closure. What he did hurt you a lot more than you probably realize or he's willing/able to admit to himself right now. Regardless of what sign, when we hurt someone unnecessarily it put a hole/void in our being. I can't imagine he's ok with everything either. Given that your families are close and you don't hate the guy, frequent friendly conversations may open the door to a more calm discussion about what happened. Often when communication is closed, bitterness and resentments grow and our perception of how the person may feel gets skewed. Ask God for strength to discuss this with him without any anger or backlash. We never really know what is going on inside another person until they tell us.

Posted by pinklibra
@Housecleaning, I fell in love one year before we even had sex, and I've known the man since I was 7, so get over yourself and grow up. Thanks and keep it moving.

To everyone else, thank you so much. I really appreciate the kind words. I will start back talking to God about it. I'm generally a loving person, I don't like bad energy with me and anyone else especially if I care. I will need to heal myself a bit more before I can be friends with him, but I can see it in the future because i'm not really upset with him right now and I don't hate him or anything. I just want to be over him. That's all.

There's your answer..G.O.D & noone else. There's really no magic trick to moving on, give it time & continue to ask the most high for strength to carry on.

Posted by HouseCleaning
you just love his pee

LOL!

Posted by tiziani
You're opposites, so there's always going to be tension even when you have no feelings towards one another.

If you have unfinished business or wounds I would suggest talking with him and getting off your chest what you have to say. As long as it's meaningful.

I have seen too many people take the "at least you still have your dignity" strong, silent, walk off into the night approach...and it makes them bitter. They replace open mindedness with hindsight.

When you confront someone who hurt you and talk it through rationally, it eliminates hindsight. You realize there wasn't anything better you could have both done, you gave it your best shot at the time, it wasn't good enough and then it's cool to move on.

Unfortunately when people don't talk they fill in the blanks with imagination running wild.

+1000. wish can always (life guarantees more than one heartbreak surely 🙂) follow on this advice!!

Yeeah, that's the shitty thing about the Aries/Libra combo. Like I've said before, when it's bad, it's terrible, and when it's good, it's great. That "great" time is a hard thing to get beyond because things click THAT well.

I'd say that you should address it with the guy and get it off of your chest. I know that's the issue between my Libra ex and I. I don't have feelings like that about him anymore, but the entire situation still kinda bugs me because of how things were handled and how stupid he behaves sometimes when I see him (it's gotten better over the last year though) which is probably the bigger issue, now that I think about it.

It's all that loose thread bullshit that lingers with you and you just wonder "why?" You can do everything to just move on, but when you were treated like that after you meshed so well with someone, with never really talking about it, can fuck with your head no matter how long it is.

That said, I know where you're coming from with this combo. Talking to him about it when you have some one on one time would probably be ideal.

Posted by rockyroadicecream
Yeeah, that's the shitty thing about the Aries/Libra combo. Like I've said before, when it's bad, it's terrible, and when it's good, it's great. That "great" time is a hard thing to get beyond because things click THAT well.

I'd say that you should address it with the guy and get it off of your chest. I know that's the issue between my Libra ex and I. I don't have feelings like that about him anymore, but the entire situation still kinda bugs me because of how things were handled and how stupid he behaves sometimes when I see him (it's gotten better over the last year though) which is probably the bigger issue, now that I think about it.

It's all that loose thread bullshit that lingers with you and you just wonder "why?" You can do everything to just move on, but when you were treated like that after you meshed so well with someone, with never really talking about it, can fuck with your head no matter how long it is.

That said, I know where you're coming from with this combo. Talking to him about it when you have some one on one time would probably be ideal.

Thanks Rocky. I will. I just have to get stronger. I know Aries does not like displays of emotion and all that, and i'm very emotional about the situation still. Once I wrap my head around the fact that this will not be happening anytime soon, then I can speak with him. And speak with him I will. Soon.