The Libra Just Replied.... Ugghhh!

Okay, just as I was bashing him and getting all resentful. I got a text about 12:15pm today from "The Libra." He said he was in DC (he had mentioned he had to go out of town for work - a conference) and that he will give me a call later so that we can talk.

Shocked, but I will take a phone conversation as he avoids face-to-face conversations at all cost. Why? I have no idea...

Funny, now I don't really want to talk to him, but I should. Closure is a must...

I shall keep you posted.

Oh! Damn that mandar! WHY do they always know we are moving on? It is beyond me.

Obviously, he is giving this a lot of thought. I wonder what he will say. Just know it is him NOT you.

Girl!!! The Aries is hot and the emotions are barely there for Mr. Libra so, I can totally be friends, I think, since my interest have drifted... Ugghhh. Weird. I kind of don't want to talk... I will since I have been doing all this bitching.

QS,

I've been reading your story. It sounds like this Libra guy is just confused. Sometimes men run scared when emotions get in the way. Some men don't like to lose control of themselves. By all means, talk to him, but don't you call or e-mail him. If he wants to talk to you, make his fingers do the walking. At least he did get in touch with you. I also totally agree with walking away when the time is right. I had to do that myself a while ago regarding a guy. I told him goodbye in December. I told him that he had to work with me to at least continue the friendship. Unfortunately, when I said it, I was so damn mad at him at the time. A few days later I sent him a text saying I felt bad for being so mad at him and if he could get in touch with me. He hasn't, so I closed the door. No more mindgames. It was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do in my life. I still think about him to this day and hope he's alright. However, I will never chase a guy and that is what I think he wanted me to do. Therefore when I've read your story, I could relate to some of it. Hope it goes well for you.

LS,

Yes, you are right that men somehow know when we have moved on. The hard part is just keep moving on if they get in touch with you again. That is when you finally know if you've really moved on or not.

Oh, mystical believe me I won't email, text or call him. He knows I have been a great friend above all else. I thought he wouldn't contact me and he still might not for awhile. He said he would give me a call later so we could talk, for a Libra it could be a week or so. LOL!!! I will definitely talk to him. I car about him, but my emotions have frozen over. I guess because I already knew when my emotions chnaged that he wasn't ready or couldn't, so I never let them spill over into love...

Anyway, we shall see if or when he calls. Otherwise, we will never know.

QS,

Well, since he didn't say when he was going to contact you again all you can do is wait. However, maybe you shouldn't be too available when he does contact you. Let him have to work a little to reach you. If he really wants to talk to you, he will keep trying. I'm not into mind games, but when he says he'll call you later and you not knowing when that will be, then he should also be left with a little wondering. Just my thoughts.

I agree

With all due respect Mystical, you know I love ya, but I think that is silly. Date like a man! Don't worry about it or put your life on hold. If you are home when he calls, answer the phone. If you are busy, don't answer the phone. Don't worry about it. Just live your life and deal with what comes.

Put the focus on you and your life. Playing ignore the call just keeps the focus on him. Ya know?

I know you know.

🙂

LS,

I hear ya. However, I don't think a girl should be too available for a guy either. Why should it be okay for the guy to say he'll call later (leaving himself open) but the girl is suppose to answer as soon as the guy calls. The guy could have said something more concrete instead of just later. QS has no idea when later is which, I think, is a little unfair. Just my opinion. 🙂

Mystical,

I have to say that I agree with LS on this one... Perhaps, as you said, stating an open-ended "later" and assuming that a girl will wait around for the ubiquitous "later" to happen is unfair, but that is merely an assumption. And, assumptions can be wrong, in which case the only person he has hurt is himself.

With your solution, by purposefully not answering the phone, she is in effect still allowing him to control her as much as if she did actually wait around for his call. Her actions, her life, are still revolving around him. Given that is what you are attempting to "fight" against, would that not be counter-productive?

The scenario / solution that you stated seems more akin to "teaching someone the error of their ways". You expect me to wait around for you, so I will force you to wait around for me (that will "teach you a lesson"). Is it truly someone's place to teach other people lessons when they do not act / think / speak according to other's standards. Whether or not a girl answers or does not answer the phone should never be because of the man, but because her and her alone. He calls, she is there, she wants to speak to him, she picks up the phone. He calls, she is there, she does not want to speak with them, she does not pick up the phone. He calls, she is not there, his loss (and maybe he will be more specific next time, not because she is teaching him a lesson, but because life is). Take life as it comes... It is far too complicated to overly complicate it with games like these.

A man's incorrect / unfair / rude expectations can only hurt a woman in as much as she allows them to. If, as LS suggested, she continues to live her life, then his expecations have hurt no one but himself, but by his hand and his hand alone.

Fair enough.

I agree with LS and Alcheme

Sorry Mystical, I know you say you have been following my story and you probably have and maybe you are a little sensitive about it because you have been in a similar situation. Although I don't agree with the reaction of this man. He and I were and maybe can still be very good friends, so unlike him in a show by example kind of way. I treat him and others as I feel they should treat me. Meaning, if I am available when he calls I will gladly talk to him, because I am interested in his view of MY sudden change of feelings (which seems to be changing back). If I miss his call. I will talk to him another time if he is still interested. If he isn't so be it.

I am 35, well aware of my worth and never chased a man, just cherished our friendship and because of my honesty and the fact I felt it was only fair to let him know my feelings changed (by the way I always told him if they did I would let him know)I knew that might jeapordize the friendship a chance I needed to take.

So, as LS and Alcheme have stated and the fact that I think they know where my head is on this. If or when he calls, cause again, he is a Libra and later could mean now, much later or maybe never if he changes his mind from that time 'til now. I will talk, if not I won't... Thanks guys...

Okay. Whatever works for you is what you should do.

Mystical, I hope I didn't say anything harsh. Sorry, I am such a blunt scorp. Hope I didn't offend you in anyway, but I am so not interested in games. I'd rather teach a lesson by example is all.

and wouldn't we all be scared to be on the receiving end of an angry Scorp?? LOL

Not little ole me!!!

Scorps are just so honest....we get along well - my best friend is a Scorp, actually I have many Scorp friends....hmmm might see how Scorps and Leos go...that could be interesting if Libra doesn't work LOL

QS,

Absolutely not have you offended me. We all have opinions. Some agree and others disagree. This is what makes life fun. Besides, I'm a nursing student so I hear a lot of things anyway. Don't get me wrong, I'm not into games either. My point was to not be too available to the Libra guy as soon as he calls. That was all. I just don't like when a guy says he'll call later because it leaves it so open.

Yes HP!!! GROUP HUG!!!

Mystical I appreciate your point of view and I do understand.

I can't see a Libra set a meeting in the future with a partner, former or current, to discuss why a relationship cannot be. We're not gentle souls in that respect.

Uh, how about EVERYONE being UNAVAILABLE for EVERYONE—? How would THAT work?

How about people just live their lives and be happy and everyone meets in the middle so there is no restment and unhappiness?

LS, that would be a perfect world wouldn't it.

Libra, huh— Don't quite get it?

Well, he wants to get together and I am just saying tha it is a positive sign...

Sorry, he wants to talk later...but equally, we're too lazy to provide proper closure. So that may not be why he wants to talk :-)

I totally agree with a group hug.

((((HUGS))))

I wish you all the best, QS. Things will work out the way they are suppose to.

LS, it might be a little too late to talk about anything else besides closure. Like Atom my interest is just about gone. However platonic friends is always an option.

Mystical, absolutely whatever shall be will be.

Haven't heard from him yet, but not waiting around to either. If he calls great if he doesn't great.

QS,

Remember to keep the positive attitude. Also a queen deserves to treated as a queen, and nothing less.

Mystical. I will only allow myself to be treated as such. Exactly, I am positive about it all. Not down or sad or upset. Just open for whatever either way.

That's the way to go. Everything will work out as they should.

*I cant see a Libra set a meeting in the future with a partner former or current, to discuss why a relationship cannot be*.

Libra can you explain this comment - yeah, yeah, Im always coming in late, trying to catch up.

benice, I asked the same question. Libra means it is a positive thing. However, because he and I are friends. I think it could go either way which is still positive for me as I know he isn't capable of a relationship right now (which was clarified in both my emails to him)however, I always told him I would let him know if/when my feelings became more and that is merely what I did. Not looking for him to say, "yes I feel the same lets do this" was just wondering what was going through his mind when I let him know of my sudden change of feeling (which has basically changed back) ultimately I'd like to remain friends...

Mystic is right. We queens need to be treated as such. It's good you want to remain friends with him; that's taking the high road.

Libra:Sorry, he wants to talk later...but equally, we're too lazy to provide proper closure. So that may not be why he wants to talk :-)

Oh my gawd!! When I ended it with my libra way back in the day, he totally was like you described, didn't wanna discuss it, he told me he missed me after I reached out to him but he wasn't interested in rekindling our relationship, I wasn't either but I loved him and wanted to make sure he was fine and he was doing good.

Tiki

When we are hurting because you've broken up with us we don't want to give you the satisfaction of finding your balancing at our expense e.g. you making sure that I am OK. We just won't give it.

When we don't like you as much as you like us and we respect you, you'll get a chat but if we don't really respect you and have moved on we have very little time for the situation. Regardless of the size of the chat - you have to come and get it, we won't come and bring it in unsolicited fashion.

Yeah, too lazy for proper closure. 'Cause there is nothing to gain - in all scenarios described above. (Bit selfish, sorry)

This is why for instance with Chatz's story (on this board) I know there is more to it... And it is true, he does want her but on his own terms e.g. not now but when he is ready.

OMG!!! I was just reading your post here Libra and thought, OMG this is so NOT my Libra 🙂

When I "dumped" mine as he put it (it wasn't it at all, it was just that he was going to break me in a million pieces if I kept seeing him the way I was), he made a huge effort to talk, to make sure I was ok, that he'd be there if I needed him, etc, he was clearly and genuinely upset that I had gotten closer than him and he didn't see it coming, he didn't want me to go away....this was only just 5 weeks ago and ever since we've gone through quite a bit I haven't even mentioned on here - he has been a rock for me, he's been my best friend, and he always makes time for me. I honestly thought he'd walk, that I wouldn't hear/see from him for quite some time until we could just be "friends"....obviously we both don't want to just be friends LOL.

Libra, he is coming round slowly and I've found peace and know that what we have is a wonderful thing. I don't question him, I no longer find Im jealous as I doubt there is anything to be jealous of, we have the best and deepest conversations at times and I love him to bits but for now I will keep that to myself - he knows this and he hasn't cut me off....perhaps things will work out, perhaps they won't but I know I have a friend in him for life 🙂 How many times can one say that about somebody they know? personally not many in my life so far. We make eachother laugh, and in every way we are absolutely compatible except that he's just not ready, he's not in the right place, etc......I can't and won't push him but enjoy when I do seem him every week 🙂

Anyway yeah, I've learnt so much, patience for a start (and OMG that for a Leo?? amazing LOL), understanding and that time sometimes needs to go by without answers, without guarantees, it just needs to go by but its all going to be ok. I for one, was great at just rushing into things head first, think later but now?? OMG I think, I analyze, I look at things differently and yeah...its been an amazing ride so far, and I can only hope its going to be a long and happy partnership with mine ahead.

While Im here, I'd really like to thank

Thelibran, Nic, Queenie, HP, LIbra, Bratsy, Atom & Alcheme and all the rest (ok its early here ok?? Im sorry if I left you off the list but you know who you are), you've all helped me understand this creature - I'd have walked a long time if it hadn't been for you guys x

OMG and Little Sparrow!!!!!

absolutely 🙂

Ahhhh now THAT is an awesome relationship!!! To just accept - ahhhh yes....oh God if only my ex Gemini could do that he'd get the best out of life....sheesh I have to say this LIbran is a breath of fresh air in comparison and even though I may not understand him or be able to work him out?? mmmmmm is all I can say 😛

"I have never been freer in my life".....yes good place to be...nothing like being imprisoned in a r/ship - ok bad memory!!!

Moving on - yessssssssssssssssss let's all be happy!!!! Life is good 🙂

Glad all is good for you too!!! Im enjoying these positive posts lately - wooohooo *dances*

Chatz, this is not your Libra because he does not NOT want you. Make sense?

Yes thank you - it makes perfect sense indeed 🙂

Im feeling pretty good over here - thank you so much. The way you explain things makes so much sense...most of the time you guys and girls are spot on!!

Fingers crossed anyway but Im just taking it easy now - not stressing and enjoy the times I get to spend with him....best I can expect to be at this time and consistancy makes it easier - he's giving me that. Perhaps one day he'll surprise me though and be "ready"...hehehehe. We shall see 😛

What's so special about Libras anyway...?

"What's so special about Libras anyway...?"

Open your mouth and close your eyes,.....

Not all of them, dear.

To make it clear... my libra wanted me back, I didn't want him, he called and asked me back and I declined to take him back....why? Too much emotional drama on both parts and I was ready to take a leap of faith and start my spiritual journey, couldn't do that with him by my side because I wasn't strong enough to handle him and my issues at the same time.

Later down the line, I would run into his mom and she would drop lil hints, I became curious about how was doing so I reached out to him, just to see how he was and when we finally chatted it up, he of course made me laugh and called me by my pet name in that cute desperate I love you so much voice but I could tell his pride had been injured because he put himself out and wasn't about to do that again, he moved to another state and he called me once or twice I think but the bond had been broken.

Libra's are wonderful, wonderful creatures, for me its all about timing, acceptance and understanding...I personally love libra's, I do find that we genuinely gravitate towards one another, and mesh well and their is great sense of ease with them.

On the other hand libras do seem pretty non chalant when it comes to the affairs of the heart and at that time I wasn't digging that, it has been over 6 years since I left my libra and I recently just kicked a libra guy friend with no benefits to the curb because of bad behavior.

again goodluck with your SO, wish u nothing but happiness!

But why would you want to get involved with another LIbra after you've been with one?? I mean honestly?? LOL......I couldn't imagine anything more draining!!!

I love my LIbran friend to bits but if we don't make it in the long run I would NEVER knowingly be interested in another!!! I will give up on men altogether I think LOL (j/k Atom!!!)

Ahhhhh and yes, just got off of msn after chatting to him for 2 hours!!! 3 more sleeps til I see him - its been a long 7 days since I did see him - yup, Im totally insane!!!

But again, would I ever pursue another Libran— NOT ON YOUR LIFE!!!! No offence - you're gorgeous creatures but sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesh!!!

xx

LOL, Chatz. I quite agree with you there....

Tikki - Not all Libras are non chalant where the heart is concerned. But we need to be happy campers with our lovers before things can progress. But when we decide to proceed it is quite permanent. Only serious contestants need apply. And for that we also look at you and the vibes you send out. It's a fragile balancing act until the mind is made up. Then, either way, we don't look back. Decision made, and that's that.

"Not all of them, dear."

Well played. Venus must have been in retrograde on that one.