How to be a Cougar (Page 3)

Posted by LovelyScorp

Posted by calthrope

Posted by LovelyScorp
"i assert that if you were to deny a healthy relationship because of some arbitrary proclamation you made about what type of woman/man you are, you're not right in the head. you're mentally fucked, you're damaged and you're the reason why old people throw poo in nursing homes. sucks to be alone and when it hits ya, hopefully dementia will have set in and you'll be too spacey to recognize it."

even though this statement sounds a bit deranged, I have to agree with it.

Yeah but Tubbyscubby always states the obvious. Plus I think from now on i will stick to making 'arbitrary proclamations' as much as Tubbyscubby loves to state the term 'arbitrary proclamations'.

Sometimes all we need is the obvious in our face and voila....you have your answer.

click to expand

Yup like poo. Right between the eyes. Flung from afar. In my nursing home.

how are you going to chastise me for stating the obvious when you lead your post by essentially saying you were about to state the obvious?

so i answered your obvious proclamation with what should be obvious but it's not so obvious because if it were obvious then you obviously wouldn't have answered the way you did by stating that there are obviously women who misconstrue empowerment with the notion that wearing pants, throwing back shots and doing it in bathroom stalls is akin to liberation.

frankly, i don't get how being able to drink a shot is what the woman's suffrage movement was all about but ok!

Posted by Hairitic
How to be Cougar:

1) coffee together in morning
2) toast together in morning
3) play at local park sit on the bleachers
4) find a hill, by city lights, let me throw a water balloon at your tits in your tank

LMAO

Posted by tubbyscubby
how are you going to chastise me for stating the obvious when you lead your post by essentially saying you were about to state the obvious?

so i answered your obvious proclamation with what should be obvious but it's not so obvious because if it were obvious then you obviously wouldn't have answered the way you did by stating that there are obviously women who misconstrue empowerment with the notion that wearing pants, throwing back shots and doing it in bathroom stalls is akin to liberation.

frankly, i don't get how being able to drink a shot is what the woman's suffrage movement was all about but ok!

I didn't say with pants? Where's the liberation in that? Nice and airy.

my bad. some linen culottes with a pantyliner then 😛

HA!! That's better, you letting your hair down. Though i'm convinced you're a guy. Women don't fire off that quick(we're not that liberated). And you had a gun between your legs. Over and out. Don't shoot.

you want me to be a guy because you want to do me. i dont roll "lik dat tho"

Oh TC, that new pic is just sooo disturbing...lol. 😉

the zombie kids are AWESOME!

hmm...but i get how people would be offended by a zombie child. so i'll change it...

😄

shhhhh

@ Lovelyscorp, et al:

""i assert that if you were to deny a healthy relationship because of some arbitrary proclamation you made about what type of woman/man you are, you're not right in the head. you're mentally treetrunked, you're damaged and you're the reason why old people throw poo in nursing homes. sucks to be alone and when it hits ya, hopefully dementia will have set in and you'll be too spacey to recognize it."

I agree with this - and this is a big hangup for many single women who're holding out for some mythical somebody to be their panacea.

I wanna freeze mine so i can have designer babies like celebs do.

I dunno who that is but given his last name, I'm going to have to rule him out.

According to that chart, I can go as young as 23.5. I'd have to leave him outside the 25+ clubs but he's old enough for a big kid's meal.

Why is he wearing dog tags? What does he do exactly? Why is there an arrow pointing to his junk?

And he's not my type. I like them tall and muscley.

I saw him on oprah. He's wack and mi thinks gay.

I'm whatever you want me to be.

Me want some cougar. 😛 M I still cougar worthy?? I'm turning 25 this September. I don't know the qualification Cougar wants. Do I need to fill up some kind of application?? 😛

And Beergo...can you describe exactly what type of cougar you're looking for? 😛

Posted by venusianbull
And Beergo...can you describe exactly what type of cougar you're looking for? 😛

- Less Hairy.

- Flexible.

- Perfect set of Dentures. 😛

- No Hand Arthritis. 😉

😄

LOL!! ^ GREAT answer.

Posted by venusianbull
LOL!! ^ GREAT answer.

I can always put the " Perfect set of Dentures" as an OPTIONAL. 😛

How about a Depends undergarment? A smoking hot walker, a tricked out Hoveround with flames down the sides. PIMP MAH RIDE. 😛

Posted by venusianbull
How about a Depends undergarment? A smoking hot walker, a tricked out Hoveround with flames down the sides. PIMP MAH RIDE. 😛

As long as there is a back seat passenger. 😛 I Think I'll give it a RIDE. 😉

Well hop on sonny, I'll show you how to knit and make pies. Got all the moves. *snap* Damn, think I just broke a hip. 😛

An Icy hot, Bengay and a couple of morphine will do the trick. That's what my grandma took when she broke her hip. 😄

GTG lovely bull. I got some sweating to do. 😛

Happy sweating. 🙂 Thanks for the tip. 😄

LOLOL When the lights go off ( clap on, clap off...THE CLAPPER ), the dentures in the cup and the zip up house coat discarded... it's time for sweet..sweet love.

TUBBY get over this vampire thing you got going

I agree. Tubby by all the saints and everything holy, the avatars woman. *cringing and holding up crucifix*

Ok will change it to something suitable

Better?

LOL You're ornery, and I can't even look at that one, I keep averting my eyes.

Zombies are awesome!!!

Zombies are cringe-a-riffic! GAHHHHHHHHHH. *runs off in terror* Oh no's! I'm all in my bra and panties and tripped in the graveyard!

They're coming to get you Barbara

EEEEEEEEEEEEK! *thud* Oh dear GAWD something is nomming on my head.

😄

😄

why show the real you give us someone else maybe a good looking bitch like ?

I have her on ignore because her moon isn't the only thing that's fishy.

Her petty ass was proven wrong again and she's off to lick herself cause no one else will.

Tate I nibble u.

I see not much has changed around here. lol

^^The more things change, the more they damn stay the same!

I'm just basking in the subtle glow of love in the area.

Posted by venusianbull
I'm just basking in the subtle glow of love in the area.

🙂 😉

Posted by BellaBulleautiful

Posted by Beergo85

Posted by venusianbull
LOL!! ^ GREAT answer.

I can always put the " Perfect set of Dentures" as an OPTIONAL. 😛

I bet you'd be amazed at what happens when the dentures come out.... 😉

click to expand

😄

LMFAO Come over and hang some shelves. Silver haired porn. Gramma got MAD SKILL.

woah tubby is now 33? WTF? she said 26

holy fuuuck 7 years in a couple months? * counts months it will take for her actual age (50's) to be known*

meh not too concerned with it we all she's a shit talking copy & paste lunatic

*looks at her new avi* bet it's closer than we know to a full representation of who she really is & just as pretty too

I thought TUBBY BUTT was 13 in the head and 70 in the bod.