Suicide Loss, Coping, and Prevetion

I haven't written an actual topic in a while. Suicide is one of those topics that can be difficult (sometimes impossible) to discuss. I myself have never been suicidal, but I've known those who have been, some of whom unfortunately have taken their lives
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  • Chuckcem
    Four neighboring signs in four different elements...That's Me...
    male
    I haven't written an actual topic in a while. Suicide is one of those topics that can be difficult (sometimes impossible) to discuss. I myself have never been suicidal, but I've known those who have been, some of whom unfortunately have taken their lives.

    Suicide is so abrupt and so sudden, that it elicits unique emotions that are not necessarily evoked when someone dies from other causes. Regardless of your thoughts/stance on suicide itself, how have you coped with losing of a person to it?

    I personally got angry when my friend died, then after some time chose to remember him by recalling funny personal memories about him. It was the best way for me to cope and to honor the my firend's memory. Part of this was because I tend to tell a lot of funny stories and it seemed that being positive helped my other friends cope with their emotions too.

    What has been your experience?
  • Chuckcem
    Four neighboring signs in four different elements...That's Me...
    male
    Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
    i am creating a painting of a tree with fall leaves in orange and on it painting two white roses in memorial of my best friends whom i recently lost.

    they weren't suicides, but it was tragic, because they are young!


    That sounds like a proper homage to honor their memory.
  • HeavyEntertainmentShow
    Finding what you have sometimes means finding it alone.
    What snapped me out of it last year is finding out that my boy was having an extremely hard time at home. Boom, it was like I was never suicidal. My worry for the love of my life was greater than my own hurt.

    Unfortunately you can't group everyone together. Some have lost the will to live, find life to be too difficult, believe noone truly cares about them or they found themselves in a situation where they're convinced suicide is the only way out.
  • Chuckcem
    Four neighboring signs in four different elements...That's Me...
    male
    Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShow
    What snapped me out of it last year is finding out that my boy was having an extremely hard time at home. Boom, it was like I was never suicidal. My worry for the love of my life was greater than my own hurt.

    Unfortunately you can't group everyone together. Some have lost the will to live, find life to be too difficult, believe noone truly cares about them or they found themselves in a situation where they're convinced suicide is the only way out.


    Glad to hear there was a force that motivated you not to do go down that path.
  • Chuckcem
    Four neighboring signs in four different elements...That's Me...
    male
    Posted by nightowl
    This is a hard topic to talk about or think about, it brings out bad memories..but because it happened ive changed perception on things. there was a time where i was alive but felt like it i was not living . Shutting out people, oversleeping, refusing to eat. Mom encouraged me to live and soon after met someone else helped me stay happy

    Now back in high school, another close friend who sat with me everyday for lunch in gr 10..took her life. She kept things internally and never really opened herself to me..she had other friends too but even they didnt know. We drifted apart in our senior year. She reached out to me before we were supposed to graduate, she said "i hope we're still good, hope we havent been too dry around in the halls lately" and i didnt know where this was coming from..and replied "dont worry everything is okay"

    Next thing i know people are posting rip posts on her facebook wall


    people sometimes internalize things and we often assume, when people reach out..out if nowhere it's important to atleast ask how they are..i realize. things do get better with the right influence on your life


    You're right it is a heavy topic, which is why I think it needs to be put out there. Also sounds like you were dealing with depression at that time. Are you still dealing with those feelings?

    It's also surreal being one of the last people (or even the last person) your friend reaches out to before they die. It's sad and makes you realize how important you were to them. I received a similar phone call, though it was a bit more vague. Years later I still wonder if my friend's last trip to see me (which occurred before his last phone call to me) was a planned trip to say goodbye.
  • 2Moon
    Balancing coffee
    Scorpio moon gang, we think about it pretty often
  • LittleFairy
    female
    Posted by Chuckcem
    I haven't written an actual topic in a while. Suicide is one of those topics that can be difficult (sometimes impossible) to discuss. I myself have never been suicidal, but I've known those who have been, some of whom unfortunately have taken their lives.

    Suicide is so abrupt and so sudden, that it elicits unique emotions that are not necessarily evoked when someone dies from other causes. Regardless of your thoughts/stance on suicide itself, how have you coped with losing of a person to it?

    I personally got angry when my friend died, then after some time chose to remember him by recalling funny personal memories about him. It was the best way for me to cope and to honor the my firend's memory. Part of this was because I tend to tell a lot of funny stories and it seemed that being positive helped my other friends cope with their emotions too.

    What has been your experience?

    Suicide ..i don't judge. There is no judgement. I hope they found what they needed. Try and offer comfort to those grieving.
    I judge the people for doing it at all ...or feel angry....i don't judge people who do feel angry ..i don't judge

    I don't really have a secret or a plan of how i will move forward...i guess i have found myself more empathetic to people who have similar issues..be it abuse or depression ..but also wary and guarded...incase i get hurt again..but it's learning to break the barriers down i suppose.
  • LittleFairy
    female
    It does make you ...self forgiving ..for the things that don't matter..and forgiving of others..
  • Chuckcem
    Four neighboring signs in four different elements...That's Me...
    male
    Posted by Cancervirgo15degrees
    One of the girls i was friends with growing up had a brother who hung himself. She found him. I dont remember much of it to be honest. We were like 13.
    I am super sensitive to the idea of it. Like for some reason if someone is going through a hard time, all i will worry about is if they are thinking of killing themselves.
    I will go out of my way to check on them constantly and try to help solve their problem so they arent sad. I will also constantly tell them how glad i feel that they are in my life and how much i need them around, so that they feel like there is someone who really cares.
    I honestly have no idea where this anxiety of someone killing themselves comes from. Its just there. ๐Ÿค”
    One of my business partners had an epic nervous breakdown because one of his multimillion dollar businesses was scammed so bad to absolute butter he had to actually shut it down. He didnt tell me till a few months later. I was never so upset. I was so distraught to think of him going through that alone i made him promise to never let himself cry alone ever again and to call me.
    This just goes to show you that you never know what a person is going through. Its scary to me that people can hide such tumultuous dark intense emotions.


    Right. At the same time, some people can go through the worst parts of life and never once consider suicide. So you don't want to feel yourself with fear over something that may never come to fruition.
  • Chuckcem
    Four neighboring signs in four different elements...That's Me...
    male
    Posted by LittleFairy
    It does make you ...self forgiving ..for the things that don't matter..and forgiving of others..


    Yes, it does put a LOT into perspective concerning what truly matters and what doesn't. It also teaches the importance of empathy and being considerate of others.
  • Chuckcem
    Four neighboring signs in four different elements...That's Me...
    male
    Posted by bittercupcake
    Iโ€™ve been there when I was around 13/14. I was going through a really rough patch. Dealing with the most abuse and bullying by both family and schoolmates was hard. It seemed like I could never catch a break.

    Luckily my willful determination and my stubbornness to prove them all wrong helped me get out. It also helped to release my frustration in writing through poetry.


    That's also a rough age. I'm glad you found a healthy outlet.
  • suicide is the best way to go for some people unfortunately

    I personally have no issues with it.If one truly feel they don't need to be alive anymore then by all means, take that trip to eternal darkness so the people who want to live will have more to survive on this earth with
  • I lost my best friend of 15 years to suicide a few years ago.
    That sucked big time.

    I cope by not visiting his grave. Ever. Someday i will. But not yet.
  • What drives me up a wall that people closest to person who will eventually take their life - all had never seen it coming!

    When my child was in 6 grade - 2 boys hanged themselves. One girl went under the train and survived.

    School conducted greaving classes.
    Neighborhood I live in is top if the places in USA. All were from good families who missed their kids suffering. The boys - we kind of know what happened. The girl - ho one ever found out and she is now the happiest confined to a wheelchair and how can that being overlooked?
    I am not judging parents.
    I just recently threw away first boys picture from funeral that was under my daughters pillow for until I just took it away from her!

    So to me now is the biggest thing is to find out how do we miss someone next to us who is suffering so much and we missing it? How? They are our blood and flesh.
    Is is fate written in a life book?
    What is it?
  • Chuckcem
    Four neighboring signs in four different elements...That's Me...
    male
    Posted by black_kevorkian
    suicide is the best way to go for some people unfortunately

    I personally have no issues with it.If one truly feel they don't need to be alive anymore then by all means, take that trip to eternal darkness so the people who want to live will have more to survive on this earth with


    My only problem with this logic is that people can change their minds about committing suicide and often do. For many suicide is a cry for help. Statistically a majority of those who survive their suicide attempt wind up never making an additional attempt. Having known a couple of people who have survived their attempts, they are much happier that they didn't actually die.

    There are also those who are happy that their suicidal thoughts were prevented with compassion and empathy. So I have a hard time believing suicide in many cases is what the person ultimately wants. What you've proposed is extremely short sighted in the broad scheme of things.
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