@Sagittarius89
17 Years1,000+ PostsSagittarius
What Do You Masterbate To?
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milf porn...DUH
Joan Rivers. I blow in seconds.
This concept of chicks wanking. It's strange to me.
Guys'd give up the sausage for free, ya know.
Ugh - the way she picks celebrities apart on "Fashion Police" makes my toes curl.
OhmyGO-HAAAAAA-UH. UH...UH.
Posted by 1two3go
Ugh - the way she picks celebrities apart on "Fashion Police" makes my toes curl.OhmyGO-HAAAAAA-UH. UH...UH.
ahahahahaha lmao
Posted by everevolvingepithet
Hahah.
Do you think she'd let you wear her death mask while putting her pelvis out of place ?
I hope not. That sexy raspy voice of hers must not be stifled.
Can you imagine her talking dirty?
Posted by PurrrrHissss
LOL, you are so candid, Sag89. 😛
Haha perhaps, perhaps. But you know you all do it to something 😛
I hate to be that guy? But you, uh... you spelt "masturbate" wrong.
Great - now I'm "that guy".
Posted by Prince_Pisces
I loved her 'How'd you get so rich' showI actually caught that. Pweedy kewl show.
Oh sorry, it's hard to type from my phone
Posted by Pb
Actually I couldn't imagine Joan talking clean lol. She.prolly has a.war.cry thoTht doesn't come from her mouth. Sounds like a rusty gate....
click to expand
DUDE. That's SO HOT!
Fapfapfapfapfapfapfap
Posted by PurrrrHissss
LOL, you are so candid, Sag89. 😛Haha perhaps, perhaps. But you know you all do it to something 😛
Oh, I didn't mean it as an insult. It's refreshing.
click to expand
Oh okay lol good
Posted by Sagittarius89
Oh sorry, it's hard to type from my phone
Don't apologise. Everything is in jest.
Oh wait - you were actually creating a serious thread?!
(I'm joking again. Masturbater who can't spell.)
Posted by ToysintheAttic
My go to picture:http://media.photobucket.com/image/rainbows and unicorns/dailycp/post_pics/unicorn2.jpg?o=61" target="_blank">
Gets me all hot.
I totally see it.
*scoops up some Vaseline*
Posted by Pb
Actually I couldn't imagine Joan talking clean lol. She.prolly has a.war.cry thoTht doesn't come from her mouth. Sounds like a rusty gate....
DUDE. That's SO HOT!
Fapfapfapfapfapfapfap
lol
Her pron name is Moan Rivers from here on out. 🙂click to expand
Nicseeeee. Moan Rivers in River Sploogers Vol 8.
Bang Bros!
Posted by ellessque
one thing I do know........none of us will be able to masturbate off THIS thread. bet that!!!!!!!!! 😛
*imagines PB, Bling, Sag Chick, Old Skool, TOC and Elle in huge orgy*
OHMAGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWD
Posted by Pb
Actually I couldn't imagine Joan talking clean lol. She.prolly has a.war.cry thoTht doesn't come from her mouth. Sounds like a rusty gate....
DUDE. That's SO HOT!
Fapfapfapfapfapfapfap
lol
Her pron name is Moan Rivers from here on out. 🙂Nicseeeee. Moan Rivers in River Sploogers Vol 8.
Bang Bros!
Hahahaha River Deep, Mounting High ?
click to expand
Holy crap - that's actually a creative title!
Crap, I left out Prince Pisces and Purhiss.
Dammit, two P's - post MORE!
How am I supposed to achieve orgasm otherwise?
You post if you know what's good for you! Don't let me reach for... the ointment...
On an unrealted note it's almost 12pm. Good niiiiight!
Posted by everevolvingepithet
am ?
Night 123go 🙂
Aargh the corrector has become the corrected!
Nite.
Okay I see this is going off subject a little and I'm late. But back to what the OP asked, I think about my guy going down on me if I have time. If I need to do it quickly, I think about me getting banged while eating a chick out. :0 don't judge meeeeee!!! Lol.
I.. thought this thread would contain porn and fantasies.
What is THIS fuckery? -.-
I am disappoint.
Oh, that's more like it.. thank you, Mebs. lol
Posted by Nefer
Oh, that's more like it.. thank you, Mebs. lol
Lol. I was about to say, "Hey! My stuff wasn't just fuckery!". Haha
Posted by Mebs
Okay I see this is going off subject a little and I'm late. But back to what the OP asked, I think about my guy going down on me if I have time. If I need to do it quickly, I think about me getting banged while eating a chick out. :0 don't judge meeeeee!!! Lol.that second one happens to be one of my favorites 😛
click to expand
I can't believe that secretive Scorp sun let you say that 🙂
Nice mebs! Haha!
Posted by everevolvingepithet
The View.
Hahaha
For the record that video was funny and not because of the people in it.
They could substitute them for anyone or thing and it would still make me laugh simply because of the editing.
I mean - the person who edited the video TIMED it to the beat!
It's just so absurd. Imagine the potential it would've had if he'd gone with a Fail compilation.
Me..being a Pisces..I just enjoy a quick wank into the sea,when no-ones around.All my little sperms get to swim about in the great mother ocean for a little bit with all the other creatures that live within fluid..much more liberating for them than being an encrusted stain on a carpet!
I do it for a cardio workout in a high temperature steam bath.
I almost died doing that once, for real. Talk about pushing the envelope, sheesh.
Posted by JayDee33
Me..being a Pisces..I just enjoy a quick wank into the sea,when no-ones around.All my little sperms get to swim about in the great mother ocean for a little bit with all the other creatures that live within fluid..much more liberating for them than being an encrusted stain on a carpet!
LMAO
Posted by DazedScorp
Fap Fap FapDo you actually laugh at things like this?
click to expand
I sure as hell did.
Posted by JayDee33
Me..being a Pisces..I just enjoy a quick wank into the sea,when no-ones around.All my little sperms get to swim about in the great mother ocean for a little bit with all the other creatures that live within fluid..much more liberating for them than being an encrusted stain on a carpet!
O_O
..this occurs only once a year..at the spring equinox of course..'swim fast and deep my little swimmers!'..I shout to them..'before those big,nasty scorpionic eagles swoop down and gobble you up!'..
ROFL!!!!! That's GREAT. ^
..'pair up and tie your tails together for company'are my last words to them...and my work is done until the heavens revolve once again.
And once a hungry,jealous,lately eagle turned on me!..perched itself upon the tip of my neptunian rod with it's sharp,piercing claws!..I was at it's mercy..with it's deep,fixed gaze it surely desired to peck into my loins to selfishly devour my dreamy,mystical essences..but it was too late!..it was all dispersed!!..and it will wait patiently 'till next year..off it flew with a crab in claw as consolation.In the distance I spotted two persons on a bridge on their phones(Gemini)..and off I run before they put the cops on me😄..
Posted by JayDee33
..'pair up and tie your tails together for company'are my last words to them...and my work is done until the heavens revolve once again.And once a hungry,jealous,lately eagle turned on me!..perched itself upon the tip of my neptunian rod with it's sharp,piercing claws!..I was at it's mercy..with it's deep,fixed gaze it surely desired to peck into my loins to selfishly devour my dreamy,mystical essences..but it was too late!..it was all dispersed!!..and it will wait patiently 'till next year..off it flew with a crab in claw as consolation.In the distance I spotted two persons on a bridge on their phones(Gemini)..and off I run before they put the cops on me😄..
Dude, gross!
Posted by JayDee33
..'pair up and tie your tails together for company'are my last words to them...and my work is done until the heavens revolve once again.And once a hungry,jealous,lately eagle turned on me!..perched itself upon the tip of my neptunian rod with it's sharp,piercing claws!..I was at it's mercy..with it's deep,fixed gaze it surely desired to peck into my loins to selfishly devour my dreamy,mystical essences..but it was too late!..it was all dispersed!!..and it will wait patiently 'till next year..off it flew with a crab in claw as consolation.In the distance I spotted two persons on a bridge on their phones(Gemini)..and off I run before they put the cops on me😄..
*swooning* And so the saga continues. Pray good sir, have you heard word from them? These unborn babes, sprung forth from your loins...or does Neptune in his wisdom breathe life into them amidst the corals..Selkies, Merfolk and all manner of beauty to swim the oceans far and wide. Dolphins at play, the mighty whale giving song and the creatures of the briny deep turning a blind eye upwards in supplication and reverence.
By sweet Neptune they will be nurtured without a doubt!,
while the Geminis seek to grass me out!,
My Jupiters can only swell,expand without my rod in hand,
Stealth my only weapon in the time the Lions stalk the land..
Well done Son of Neptune! Well done! You have Earths blessing good sir. *gathering up russet skirts and deeply bowing*
I personally get my rocks off to these three strikingly hot women.
*making sigh on the cross* Saints preserve us. LMAO That's unholy.
Posted by OP3CRIMSIN
I personally get my rocks off to these three strikingly hot women.
*chokes*
Top 5 Funniest Things I've Ever Read In Ever.
Posted by OP3CRIMSIN
I personally get my rocks off to these three strikingly hot women.
lmao
Posted by exoskeleton
i feel like i just walked into a circle jerk. 🙂we can assume that everyone who didn't answer massabates while browsing dxp, yes? 😛
What?!?! No...... Yeah ok. GUILTY!!!
Posted by Pb
So long as no ones interlocking hands a la Dxp dutch rutter...Lmao @ Hanson.
Why?!?!?! Those are the best. Team effort.
Oh. My favorite pr0ns? Cunnilingus, creampies, tit sucking, love(The legit amateur ones that get removed after a short while 😢. Not the ridiculous titles such as, "Jenny Love gets fucked by Tyler Bigfuck").
Oh, romantic novels too. Not erotic novels. Romance novels.
Okay, show of hands who was NOT wanking off to this thread...those that are one hand'll do.
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Lately I've been thinking about this old scorpio guy I use to know. Sometimes my ex's. Or porn.
How about you all? 😛
Haha!