Pisces Male

So this Pisces guy I am dating had told me that he was not ready for me because he was in a six-year relationship with his ex that ended last April. We met May and he had only told me about this last week, after we haven't been talking to each other for two weeks. I was really jealous at that time and said harsh things so the guy completely cut me off for two weeks.

Last week, he decided to contact me once again. And we went out almost everyday. The problem is that I can't seem to not be jealous about his attitude towards his bestfriend (he was the reason why I was jealous weeks before). Because we even scheduled a date one evening and he cancelled it for his bestfriend. The next day, he was quick to retaliate and invited me for a dinner, which lead to movie date and later on, we got stranded. We ended up in a motel. I was really particular not to engage into sex since I might be hurting his 'bestfriend's feelings. Through out the night, I was resisting. But in the morning, he initiated it and it happened.

My problem is that I don't know if he and his bestfriend have something. Whenever I ask him about it, he always tells me that they don't have a relationship and I don't need to be jealous about the bestfriend. The relationship is now on its knees because he feels like I'm not trusting him, asking about the bestfriend over and over again.

What do you think shall I do?

lol

I'm confused. Is his besrfriend the one he had a six year relationship with, or are you talking about two different people?

-bookmarks-

Posted by PiscesFebFish
I'm confused. Is his besrfriend the one he had a six year relationship with, or are you talking about two different people?

We're talking about two different people. The bestfriend of his is his childhood friend. And they just got close recently.

Posted by Nemesis

Posted by charotera

What do you think shall I do?

STOP bitching about his best friend. honestly, lay it off because it seems like you are making it to be a menage a trois that it is not.

the "best" friends in our lives will always be top priority.

in your opinion what weighs heavier? a six year friendship or a fresh few month old encounter?

click to expand

The best friend isn't the one he had six year relationship with. 🙂

But when we went home tonight, we're okay. He told me he's not okay. But before we parted ways, we held each others hands locked hard. I messaged him and said I was sorry and we bade each other good night at BBM. I hope it's not too late.

Hold on wait a minute ...

"The problem is that I can't seem to not be jealous about his attitude towards his bestfriend (he was the reason why I was jealous weeks before"

are you telling me that you are jealous of his MALE bestfriend? Are you male or female?

I need answers.

Posted by GodMadeBeauty
Hold on wait a minute ...

"The problem is that I can't seem to not be jealous about his attitude towards his bestfriend (he was the reason why I was jealous weeks before"

are you telling me that you are jealous of his MALE bestfriend? Are you male or female?

I need answers.

Yes, I am a male. He's male and he has a male bestfriend.

Posted by Nemesis
but, if, when, maybe......yeah. the thoughts always come after the actions.

well, whatever. i won't be spiteful. so good luck.

ps: i have yet to meet a pisces who enjoys being depended on for another persons happiness. most pisces HATE it. we do however admire strong and self sufficient people.

So what's your advice? I think he sees me as strong and self-sufficient type of person. Just that, I'm really the jealous type.

Posted by Nemesis

Posted by charotera

Posted by Nemesis

^^that is a contradiction in itself though.....

i gave you my advice. stop talking about the best friend and making accussations, unless of course you want to see where that leads you....

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Nice, I will do that. Hopefully, my relationship with him isn't over yet. He told me I know what he's disappointed about and that I know how he reacts when he's not okay. But I hope we can still patch things up. I admit though that the weight is on my side to do the right things.

I agree with Nemesis, he hasnt given you a reason to not trust him and he is allowed to have friends if you go into everything thinking the way you are right now, you will end up single forever.

Okay, I get it. Now I see how wrong I am. Is there any way I can make it up to him?

Posted by Nemesis

Posted by ArticleL
-bookmarks-

article, do you have a best friend? 🙂

click to expand

Depends on what your definition of a best friend is.

Posted by Nemesis
speaking from the piscean perspective of my love life; whenever a person has tried to do everything "right" 24/7, fix things that are not broken; bend themeselves and become putty i could play with - that is when all interest dies. because they are pretending to be somebody they are not. that's when i start to be an asshole, i suppose. idk. do not be a pleaser all the time.

so i just need to lie low for now and just feel wrong. I hope he still talks to me tomorrow.

Posted by Nemesis

Posted by ArticleL

Posted by Nemesis

Posted by ArticleL
-bookmarks-

article, do you have a best friend? 🙂

Depends on what your definition of a best friend is.

a person i would share my last skittle with....

click to expand

Dont know about I as in you but me yes.

But will a typical Pisces run away from someone because of this?

Hi ArticleL, I would love to know your insight! 🙂

My insight is typicial is not good enough go get charts and come back.

Posted by 88pisces
Yes Charotera.

Im surprised he is still around. first sign of jealousy without love makes me run for the highest hills....

what sign are you??

I'm an Aquarian. Well, he actually cut me off two weeks ago because I got jealous and lashed harsh words. He came back a week ago and since then we picked up. We meet almost everyday. And then this.

Posted by Nemesis

Posted by charotera
But will a typical Pisces run away from someone because of this?

^^ do you see what i mean about your insecurties?

it is impossible for me to answer that question charotera, only you can do that for yourself.

click to expand

Ok thanks! I just need to be more confident and develop solid trust on him

Well, the way I see it you have three choices...

1. Find someone to be with who doesnt bring out feelings of insecurity

2. Keep your "enemies" close- befriend the bestfriend

3. stop worrying so much and see what happens, in time all things are revealed

Yeah, and knock that shit off. Because - you are about to experience pushing a pisces forgiveness to the brink.

You lashed out. He forgave, gave another chance. This can go on, and on.... and then at some point he will go completely cold when it has been one too many times. You can't take advantage of the fact that he has a big heart and will give another chance. So fix yourself. Get in check, or watch him be gone.

Best English of my life.

Posted by deezie
Yeah, and knock that shit off. Because - you are about to experience pushing a pisces forgiveness to the brink.

You lashed out. He forgave, gave another chance. This can go on, and on.... and then at some point he will go completely cold when it has been one too many times. You can't take advantage of the fact that he has a big heart and will give another chance. So fix yourself. Get in check, or watch him be gone.

Best English of my life.

Is there anything I can do to make it up to him or would I just let time heal things out.

Posted by Nemesis
i have the image of a dog chasing it's own tail......

*'exits thread*

Sorry. 😢( But okay, I will just lie low.

Everyone is this thread is giving concrete advice me agree.

Sidenote: PWF, love the tattos.

You make it up to him, by not repeating your mistake. At this point (I forget), if you are on the outs with him, you have to wait and see if he chooses to let you back in. If he does; don't, for the love of god, do it again. At this point you have put yourself in his hands. He may leave, he may come back - depending how far you've pushed him.

My only suggestion might be to recognize your actions, how it affects him, and apologize for it. But seeing as your jealousy over this friend of his seems to be quite long lived, the apology would probably be hollow (it's not like this was a one time issue).

Action is your best friend, or worst enemy right now. Depending on how much you can keep yourself in check.

All in all though, I see this as a losing battle. I don't think you are ever going to truly be alright with his best friend. And pisces likely already knows that, and doesn't see the point in being with someone who can be insecure about his friendships that preceded your own relationship.

Posted by deezie
You make it up to him, by not repeating your mistake. At this point (I forget), if you are on the outs with him, you have to wait and see if he chooses to let you back in. If he does; don't, for the love of god, do it again. At this point you have put yourself in his hands. He may leave, he may come back - depending how far you've pushed him.

My only suggestion might be to recognize your actions, how it affects him, and apologize for it. But seeing as your jealousy over this friend of his seems to be quite long lived, the apology would probably be hollow (it's not like this was a one time issue).

Action is your best friend, or worst enemy right now. Depending on how much you can keep yourself in check.

All in all though, I see this as a losing battle. I don't think you are ever going to truly be alright with his best friend. And pisces likely already knows that, and doesn't see the point in being with someone who can be insecure about his friendships that preceded your own relationship.

I will try my hardest not to be jealous anymore. It's not really that I don't trust him. Now I've come to realize it's more of how I don't trust myself that much. Thank you guys! And more insights would be appreciated. I would love to know how we would be tomorrow. Maybe letting him have fun with his friends this weekend and giving him space would be good thing to do.

Have you ever tried to hold on to a live fish?

They wriggle, and squirm, flop around, struggle... until they get back in the water, where they come and go as they please.

He will do as he pleases. If it pleases him to be with you, he will be with you. If it feels like you're trying to control him when he's with you, he will do his damnedest to swim away. Please see that your jealousy over his best friend is seen as a form of trying to control him. Do you want to control him? Keep him out of the water, until his poor gills are void of oxygen and he dies? Stop being jealous.

This may be semantics, but "letting him have fun with his friends this weekend" - is totally not up to you. He will do that regardless of what you wish, if that's where his priority/desire is. I'm hoping you meant that more as "I'll just let him be", which is how you kind of have to approach the whole relationship now. Let him come to you. If he wants to, he will.

Thanks!

@deezie: Yes, I meant I'll let him be. 🙂

As expected, he ignored all my messages yesterday. I think it's the end. LOL. But I'm okay. I know it's my fault. How could I have let a really great guy go.

Exact problem. You didn't let him go. You chased him away.

After all of that the other day, you still sent a bunch of texts yesterday. And I'm willing to bet you aren't done trying either. You're way too high maintenance.

Posted by deezie
Exact problem. You didn't let him go. You chased him away.

After all of that the other day, you still sent a bunch of texts yesterday. And I'm willing to bet you aren't done trying either. You're way too high maintenance.

I did. I was referring to the "Good night" message I sent after we other day. I let him go, didn't chase him. Studied all day and had fun with my friends to take my time off from thinking about him. I didn't try anything. Didn't even update my Twitter unless someone mentions me so he won't have to think of me when he sees me on his timeline. Even today, I just studied all day and still got nothing from him. I know Pisces people need time to evaluate things. I really hope he talks to me soon. But it's not my call anymore, he needs space and time to rethink everything, if it is even worth trying to be friends with me again. Right now, I'm trying to be optimistic that he will still talk to me but I am preparing myself if he doesn't.

Ok, good. I take it back. haha

UPDATE: He responded yesterday! And we had dinner and went to the movies. Not touchy enough though. But I'll take everything slowly from now on 🙂

Posted by xxnightbynight
lololol ... I dated a Pisces male for 6 years... I learned the hardway to never come b/w him and his friends... if you do... things get ugly... fast. - Regardless of whether you think something is going on or not... if you think something is going on, and confront him... he'll probably lie anyway.

Correct, so what's the best approach? Run? HAHA.