Pisces woman confusion!

Hi y'all,

I am confused about a pisces woman.

Here is some background to the story.

I have known this girl for about 10 years, but only casually, through other distant friends.

About 6 years ago, we were at the same bar and she came up to kiss me hello (nothing serious, just on the cheek) and i said, "how about a proper kiss", meaning a pash. Well, she happily obliged and can i say, what a kisser! Anyway, nothing became of it and we both went our seperate ways, seeing each other occassionally and saying hello. But every time i saw her i would say, "i'll give you a call, we'll catch up" and she would say okay and time would move on and a year later i would see her with her friends and the whole thing would happen all over again. It was always said with an air of casualness about it, so i don't think there were any expectations on either part.

Anyhow, about a week ago i saw her again, at a bar i sometimes go to. I have never seen her there before, and she came running up to me and said, "give me a pash", and threw herself at me. Needless to say, i responded a bit, but i was rather shocked, so i was probably not as enthuesiastic as she was, although still into it.

Anyhow, she was asking me if i "had a girlfriend yet" and i said no and she said, "well, give me your number and we'll go out on a date" and i said, "ok". So, at the end of the night, before i went home, she made sure she had my number and i asked for hers. She asked to come back to my place and when i said no, she invited me back to hers. I was really tired by this stage and just wanted to go home (and not start a relationship at home base if you know what i mean!), so i explained that i was tired and that i was going to go home and sleep but that i would see her during the week for our date. We had arranged the night and time and everything.

Anyway, it gets to the night before and i still hadn't heard from her, so i called to see where she was at and to offer to reschedule if she was busy or tired etc. Anyhow, i rang her mobile and my number would have come up on her screen but there was no answer. I left a return number.

The next day arrives and i still hadn't heard. It got to 7pm and i still hadn't heard so at 8:30pm i messaged to say, "you stood me up, how rude! speak soon" and just left it at that. Well, this was almost a week ago and i still haven't heard from her.

My question is this:

What the hell went on? Why haven't i heard from her? What could possibly be on her mind?

I know alcohol was involved, but i didn't think she was that drunk, or drunk at all when we kissed/arranged our date. Also, that same night i messaged her when i got home confirming our date and she messaged back, "see you then" (although that was 4am at the time).

We are in our thirties and are ready to settle down, so i don't understand how somebody can do this.

Confused.

So, what i am trying to say is she stood me up. How can she just switch off after being so seemingly interested/attracted/hot?

Yeah but I don't agree wth your advice to just sit back and wait for her to contact green eyes if she really wants him. I'm a bit of sick of hjearing this suggestion even though sometimes it is wise and the best course of action. I, like green_eyes, have been on the receiving end of this kinda behavior and I also have been the perpetrator of it as well. But it's not fair on the other person to be left feeling so confused and restless because of this girl/guy's mixed signals. Because if they do it once, especially so early, they are very likely to do it again. I would say leave her alone as she sounds like she is only gonna mess with your feelings and/or head.

Haha!

Well, do you think she is worth to fight for? Or you think it is better to sit wait and hope for the best??

Dude, get your damn phone and call her and say "Why do you f**ck with me? If you do not want to be with me then say so but if you are going to do this then take some responsibility cookiemonster!!".

It will work, dont worry.

Thanks everybody for your advice! At this stage, i am not going to fight for her. There is nothing to fight for. She has stood me up on our first date so as far as i can tell, that is a sign of things to come.

There are plenty more fish in the sea, excuse the pun! And many of them not unreliable pisceans. Lol.

So, she can have her space. I am moving on. The hard thing is i don't hate her, i like her, but i will not stand for this kind of behaviour. It is not that hard to pick up the phone and say "i don't want to go out on wednesday night, i'll call you later", or "i want to cancel wednesday night". It is just bad manners and i am going to tell her that if i see her again.

And also, i am busy, i haven't got time for this.

Thanks once again people's.

Haha

You lost her without action.

You are loser.

haffo that's not really an accurate take on it. If she sees green_eyes chasing after her it will probably subconsciously make her treat him even worse than she has already. She is not a prize to be won, she is a person and so she will come to him if she wants to and she doesn't appear to know what she wants at the moment so she needs to be left to figure it out for herself and not hurt people like green_eyes in the process.

Maybe she just wanted booty that night and not on wednesday night lol,thats not really that uncommon regardless of starsigns when you really think about the whole alcohol and bar scene thing.

Well said MellowDee.

I didn't lose her through inaction because i never "had" her in the first place. Lol. I was quite assertive to her advances, so i don't think apathy was the issue here.

Haffo, you shouldn't laugh at another's misfortune. One day it might be you.

Ha, yeah, Tiamat, i think she might have! But she got really personal and started saying all this stuff, like she always thought i was a nice person etc.

Mleh, who cares anyway. I have a more important things to do, like find a job. I don't need to be thinking (too heavily) about a girl that doesn't follow through on what she says. And you are right about the bar scene, i hate it for that.

When i am driving past her in my Mercedes Benz she can look on with envy, and i promise i will not drive too close to the gutter if it is raining.

Well green eyes.

Good luck. I said what needed.

Not just good luck, but good "luck" for you.

Hello Green-eyes,

Your confusion it warranted and I know because I am a Pisces woman in my thirty's. I hate to say it, but I think she was probably intoxicated when she agreed to the date not to mention when she asked you to go home with her. She may have been imbarrassed afterwards which is typical. She saw a familiar face and being out with her friends, she wanted some affection that night and you turned her offer down. She chose to go home with you that night and you put her off until later (not good). I understand you were tired and you didn't want to start off that way, but Pisces are hard to understand and that makes it very difficult for anyone to not be confused. I confuse myself all the time. We want what we want even if we think we can't have it. I can say that I don't like to be chased or persued, I am the aggressive party. We want to choose you; not the other way. I can speak only for myself here, but I tend to shy away from a guy who is chasing after me, because I'm scared or just not interested.

Unpredictable is the word of the day. I know for me, I can go from one feeling to another in a matter of seconds, much less over a week. I think she wants a challenge even if it's an act; she wants to feel like she is in control of the situation. As to your remark about the Mercedes. As a Picses, I think you should know that most Pisces could care less about material things. I like nice things, but they do not impress me, in fact it is insulting that people place so much weight on money, when love is what we want. We beleive in love at first site, love struggles,lasting love. If you want to win a Picses, you have to give them something to work at or fix. Sounds stupid, but it's true for me and some other Picses woman I know. For now, I say let it go... If you see her again, don't say hello to her first. Then if she tries to kiss you or something, be sorta stand offish with her. Don't call her! She won't answer... She will call you wondering why you didn't call her, but she'll be very cool about it. If she asks to get together, say we'll see I'm busy, I got a lot of shit going on. We always have a lot going on and we love to think we have to make time for love. Don't be cold or rude because you will lose ground immediately. Be unresponsive, but only until she gives in and if she doesn't, there is something missing and she isn't interested. Don't take it personally though. I know that's easy to say, but its true. It is you, it's her... Your probably a great guy and as you said there are a lot of fish in the sea (no pun intended) 🙂

jennlynn13

Hell NO!

If you let her wander off, she will start to think that you are not interested with her and once she start to think like that - you're done. I know Pisces women from real life experience, so dude, you let her go, she will swim away and wont even tell you what the problem is. Confrontation is the key for success. She wont give you much weight unless she will know that her efforts in the first place havent gone for nothing. She left you because probably thinked that you are not that much interested in her which I think is 70% of the reason. Look at what you have written, you turned down her many times and those doesnt go unnoticed. The best thing would to show where you stand for her and let her decide. Without that, this is the fight lost without an effort.

I told you that, now this your choice.

It's because thats a very self-centered and unreasonable way to approach someone you supposedly like haffo.She wanted the date and so what if the guy says no because he's tired,it's actually more of a good thing to not sleep with someone while intoxicated with the dating senereo.Either they may regret it later because of the whole friend thing or they didn't really like the person when sleeping with someone while they're drunk.If thats what is going on in her head shes crazy and unreasonable when it comes to the reality of dating and seriously liking someone.Sex(which is what it looks like she only wanted) and being actually interested in someone for dating are two different things.Someone doesn't "need" to be tested at all in relationships,let alone before the first date.She's a need to get her head out of her butt person if that is the case.

Forget about that part Tiamat. It's kinda childish to think about everything like that. Oh you didn't touch me then I dont touch you etc etc etc. It's a love affair not business. If he want her he should act, now!

Thank you for taking the time to write such eloquent and interesting responses (Especially jennlynn13, you opened my eyes to a lot of issues).

At this stage i am not going to call.

Just out of interest, jennlynn13, why do you think it was a "big mistake" not to have gone home with her that night? Surely a female or otherwise would respect it if you didn't want to just use her as a sex object?

Gosh, i am seriously thinking about moving state. I don't have much going for me here, so it feels like a real option.

That is, "interstate".

So the typical pisces confusion is contagious? hmmmm? hee hee JK

Haha. Yes, you're right!

The answer to your dilemma is simple & sweet, green-eye. You turned her down a few times, she gets discourage, so she is holding her feelings back. She now becomes very caution, by keeping her distance. She wants to answer your phone calls, but her mood changes so rapidly that at that moment when you call, she may not answer because she recall how hurt she was when you rejected her requests. So, she is content with the situation & leaves it as it is.

If you want her back in your life, you have to get her to gain your trust and reassure her you like her & that you didn?t reject her because you didn?t like her.

I?m in a similar situation, like her. This guy said one thing and always does nothing. But he tells me to be patience because he going through a crazy time in his life. I?m content with his answer, so I don?t hope or push for anything further. I?ve learned to, ?Take it for what it is.?

I am Pisces girl myself.

Good luck.

Someone still in right mind.

Hello haffo,

I have to be, especially when I'm a Pisces with many emotions.... 🙂

Yeah

Greeneyes
"so i explained that i was tired and that i was going to go home and sleep but that i would see her during the week for our date. We had arranged the night and time and everything."


"If you want her back in your life, you have to get her to gain your trust and reassure her you like her & that you didn?t reject her because you didn?t like her."


He already did that!Unless shes a psycho and then thats her problem.

Sorry I like pisceseans but when it gets to this kind of stupidity it's unbearable.

"Sorry I like pisceseans but when it gets to this kind of stupidity it's unbearable."

Correction,the picseans I've met I like because they are quite a bit more realistic than this.

"Forget about that part Tiamat. It's kinda childish to think about everything like that. Oh you didn't touch me then I dont touch you etc etc etc. It's a love affair not business. If he want her he should act, now! "

It's childesh to think like daydreamer,they aren't in love yet!He doesn't owe her anything because she is just a friend up until the point that they start dating.If anything SHE is playing the "oh you didn't touch me I don't touch you." thing.

"She wont give you much weight unless she will know that her efforts in the first place havent gone for nothing."

Same goes for other people,he has nothing worth working for with this chick.She basically said she didn't want to date him by standing him up before they even dated.Expecting too much is the case with that,they aren't going to get the real thing that way.

Oh yeah,not you haffo,you've been misslead me thinks,get judgemental already women are evil especially ones that play those games.

Oh Daydreamner, thanks for your message.

Haffo, just to clear things up... We were not offically dating, and the contact we had had previously was purely casual and bi-yearly at most. It was litelly a case of me with some friends, seeing her sitting in a cafe with some friends, and me saying hello and motioning that i would call her, but i never did. It seemed pretty casual on both parts, so i don't think she was holding it against me after all those years. We had a really casual aquaintenship and met through mutual friends. Really, it was our mutual friends that probably bound us together in the first place.

Tiamet, you are funny! And right on the money.

I think she was after some attention and affection for the night and her standing me up was purely a way of saying she is not interested, which is fine.

I guess if she had have responded i would have pursued her and gone out of my way to make her feel wanted/desired. This would not have been a problem on my part!

Tiamat-

What I say is from experience. Scorpios I know are over dramatic & manipulative. So your feedback comes from experience too, which is from the receiving end.

It's not scorpio related,it's sagittaurius(+a leo mars) and earth sign(taurus) related coming from me so no,it's coming from being straightout BLUNT and direct HONESTY morals.Why did you think the truth was always Positve?

So you are also a Sagittarius, very blunt & rude. But, being blunt doesn?t mean being factual. I know some Sagittarius; they say things & do things without any knowledge of the actually truth?they think they know better, so they take it upon themselves to speak for other, which the words doesn?t correspond what the other person was really trying to express.

Wow,you really don't know as much as you think you know about astrology do you?lol.Okay,each and every individual starsign differs because there this thing called a NATAL CHART.Breakdown on what a natal chart is;there is 12 planets in each and every persons natal chart based on thier birthdate,birthtime and location of birth.Sun sign basics,moon emotions(for me taurus;very practical,stable and doesn't fall in love even half as easy as water signs do and funny,rarely have breakups because of that fact),venus how you fall in love(for me sagittarius;in other words if I was a dude and a girl tried to force me into commitment when I don't really love this person in honest and direct terms(meaning playing stupid games and not being direct with me),I will leave thier ass),Mars sex and business drive(for me leo;I hate singlemindedness and again GAMES and dishonesty) and finally rising sign how people see you again sag,people who plays games with me are going to have it thrown in thier face.And other planets I do have alot of analysing "virgos" in brain areas,theres no scorp except for sunsign and uranus which again is a brain and learning type planet which is very similar to virgo in analysing and nothing to do with "emotions".

And since we are playing on starsigns as a "defense" method chosen by YOU BTW.You're proving the dreaded to pisces "jetjags" post correct by trying to make this woman look like a "victem" in this when she obviously just made a common mistake.Astrology isn't "factual" either,it's not a "science",it's a process of theorys based on what "month" someone is born,a really big HAH in terms of facts or reality.I read this post with the fact that this girl is a pisces being the LAST thing on my mind,unlike you apparently and seen it in a realistic POV,apparently again unlike you.I know what you are trying to correspond and I don't agree with it at all because it's not anywhere near a guy you chase around that doesn't respond to you so you "ignore" them.The dude showed he was interested,they weren't dating,they weren't anything.BIG difference in reality.Reread the post in a realtime POV because it isn't about "you" or take the full consequances of the "astrology" arguement if you want to continue with this.Greeneyes is a libra BTW,so what are you going to try to dog a "libra" in terms of a "pisces" too.The only problem with libras are they aren't extremist because of with KNOWING both sides of the coin therefore shallow people consider them "indecisive" which is a problem for pisceseans too🙂.

Oh hey aquiella,based on sag starsign people,don't worry about it and yes your doing the right thing to move on from it.He's probably a ho who got distracted by another female and is braindead to the fact that he even dated you or something,just because I have sag in my charts don't mean I agree with them in those areas fully with the leo and taurus being there also and in higher degree-age than the sag except for the rising which doesn't really effect anything by standands being the rising and my mercury sag isn't that high either,the virgos has higher affect in brain thinking pattern and scorp coving the curiousity to learn and research new things being a "nosey" sign.Basically I communicate like a sag even if I don't think like one except for honesty is the best policy.

And see daydreamer,a living person whos actually kinda been hurt being on the recieving end of it who YES it's more rude and inconsiderate of this chick to do it.Theres nothing in there that paints her being the victem and if she did feel rejected,she should've spoke up(still her fault)because people aren't mind readers and you end up being like greeneyes who has no clue he rejected her because she never gave him the chance TO reject her in the first place,IT'S HER OWN DOING in either direction.

Dear Greeneyes,

I haven't read most of the message, only the first post. So, I don't know if anything progressed since then. But, I'm going to tell you the truth and it might hurt a bit. It seems like that she was hurt that night and really just wanted to sleep with someone. She wanted to be a bad girl for that one night.

Good luck.

Timat--I don't know what you try to prove by telling me all your sun, moon signs, etc?
I was only giving my suggestions to green--eyes. But you don?t have to say other people opinions are childish or wrong. I think the more suggestions green-eyes get, the more he have a broader ideas about this girl. I think you can give your reasons without criticizing someone else?s. But again, you are a blunt & rude.

What I am is a hot head who turns idealistic when people don't use basics on morals and principles when it comes to treating other people badly and then plays victem or that it was somehow "justified" when it's not.Look at how doing that form of action affects the people who you think are neglecting you,thats what my point has been from the getgo,you changed it into the astrology stuff.So look at the post of the people who have been on the recieving end of it and then look at it,it is childesh and selfesh.I think you may find that when you speak up when you take things personally you may find yourself in alot happier relationships.There really is no way any of that is justified when you never speak up about it,try it you may find out you get what you want by being direct more than you do when you play "hurt" and go on vengeful methods of getting back at the person.Thats what it is vengeful,it's not anyone elses problem that you don't get what you want because you don't know how to speak up!We all are own worst enimies so what are you trying to avoid admitting about yourself?and again it's never anyones elses fault only yours.

This guy doesn't want that girl. That's all.

"This guy doesn't want that girl. That's all. "


The girl didn't want this guy.Thats all.Im really tired of this pisces being an immediate victem crap,it's old seriously.

There is enough information to say that this guy didn't wanted her. She just didn't follow the routine bereak up routine and cut it right in the middle of it.

YAWN.Whatever,she wanted the date,she set it up when she was DRUNK and then stood him up after lying to him that she'd be there later.If she was serious about it she would've had no problem understanding that he was seriously tired and just wanted to sleep that night and the phone call afterwards would've been proof enough that he was serious.Saying that it isn't her disregard to following through is condoning this in otherwords excusing it because just she's a pisces.SHE didn't want to take him on seriously in the first place so you can't make him out to be the bad guy who didn't care because he did do his part and theres no reason why he shouldn't take it as the disinterest in him from her.This conversation is actually proving something else I read correct by avoiding the facts that this chick isn't no victem.


"They're mainly alcoholics, drug addicts, over eaters, sleazebags, liars, spineless wimps, leaches, self pitying and all that's wrong with human nature. They whine a lot about their sorrows to get others sympathy thus manipulating people that way. They are more two faced than Gemini. At least Gemini's don't take themselves so seriously and aren't jumping on their soapboxes every chance they get. Pisces does not like to accept responsibility for any wrongdoing. It's always somebody else's fault or circumstances.

One thing about Pisces that I notice is that many of them start out as sweethearts and when somebody f---s them up really bad they don't recover and display their bad side. They don't have the resiliency to bounce back from heartaches and hardships and move on like other signs. The Pisces seems to be stuck in a time warp reliving the event over and over again. They just don't seem to move on and accept things for what they are. Bitterness creeps in. Some learn their lesson temporarily until they fall in love again and get duped. They're so emotional and put on their rose colored glasses with the wrong people. When they meet nice people they don't appreciate them and treat them bad to precipitate mistreatment directed towards them. It sounds twisted but true. "

You are mostly talk on assumptions Tiamat. I talk about what happened there and I say "According to general air of situation happened between them, he turned her down many times, which she interpreted as 'no need to deal with losers' and left scense without any fuss".

Where did he turn her down,he turned her "sex" offer done.Thats only once and he talked to her on the phone afterwards to double check the date,she never asked him out before that night so it's not in there,it's not assumptions it's what is written in the post,theres nothing about previous "turn downs" in there.

Bieing it sex offer or not is irrelevant. That is your assumption (or whoever's who bring it here).

Saying "tired" could mean many things. Why do you jump right on possibility that he says "truth". He might just toy with her as well (speaking from her POV). She might didn't want to mess with him any further and gave him wash off.

+ all this telephone convos, SMS and stuff like that is BS. Many things could happen with phone. The best way to get info is to speak face to face in such matters.

Thats why the phone call is there,why assume this guy is going to use her when he's sitting here obviously confused about it-meaning he was going to date this girl if she had showed up.Why assume he isn't telling the truth?It's in her head,meaning if thats the case she's taking it out on new people who may be good for her because of other peoples mistakes.She isn't going to be reading this since she didn't show up for the date and therefore won't end up seeing this on his computer.People come here to ask questions so you do have to think of the other person as well as the poster,theres no reason this should raise suspecion on the posters side being as there'd probably be alot more hate thrown into it.You have to think of BOTH posters positions not just the one who shares your sign.You either try to figure out if this person is worth it to them and then give how to's.He has standards as anyone else and I don't blame anyone for not wanting to be with someone who makes decisions based on imagination.

"Some find Pisces' tendency to be late for appointments, spaced out behavior, and absent-mindedness amount to irresponsibility. Pisces would be shocked to know this, however. Who me? Pisces wonders. Irresponsible?"

^^It's one those those🙂

Think your aqua cousin,it's the SAME problem only this one IS defnately the other persons business.

I do think from both sides, and I dont see any action from side of poster to make sure that he speaks the truth. Just saying "I am tired" is enough to create many suspicions without any further assurance. You say "Why should she not trust him?", I say "Why should she trust him?". What makes us think that ballance of scales falls on one side of those two? His rejection without showing assurance is indicator of where the scales are going. She just didn't wanted to mess with this guy, since she thought he is a loser.

My couisin and me are on firm grounds about our responsibilities. He teamed up with my father and betrayed every moral limit that I could ever tolerate. I do not talk with my father at all and my father used my cousin to learn things about me like what am I doing, what is my plans etc. My father mistakingly send the message to me that actually intent to go to my cousin. This is a proof. Yet, my cousin was claiming that my father was just mind gaming and intentionally was sending those messages to me instead of him. However, according to our past relationship I saw he lies. He did lie to me many times. And I do not trust him. + the messages from my father stopped coming to me after I told him that he works behind me and to get lost. So, that is another proof for his treachery. I dont think I would ever forgive him.