Breaking up.. Text or call?

Planning to break up with my cappy man.. I want to do it face to face but i knew him, we will not entertain this kind of "drama".. He might just sit there and look like a lifeless statue and me like talking to a concrete..

Definitely phone

Text it first. See if even wants to talk on the phone. He will say so if he does. Then decide whether you want to or not.

Posted by Virgiene
Planning to break up with my cappy man.. I want to do it face to face but i knew him, we will not entertain this kind of "drama".. He might just sit there and look like a lifeless statue and me like talking to a concrete..

Any Long term or serious relationship deserves face to face- if you have an iota of respect for yourself and for somebody who has invested time in you, it's basic manners.

Who cares what he will or will not tolerate. It's not exactly his call is it.

You are making the decision to break up with the man with or without his input. So supposedly his opinion is not a factor, just give him the respect any human being deserves.

Grow some ballsh 😎

And good luck! x

I'd say neither really, go face to face, that's what this generation with technology takes away from people, they do it the easiest way, phone text or call, while taking away all the experience and all emotions while breaking up face to face, in my thoughts it's a must, the truest experience, might not be the most plesant one but it's real, and doing it by phone you're missing it, all these emotions coming up, all those feelings, and you were with that cap man yes? you should atleast give him enough respect to part ways by telling face to face, that's what i think everyone should do, face to face experience, don't hide behind technology. 🙂 either way it's your choise, i just invite you to think about it. 🙂

Posted by AriesLove
People do things by phone or text to avoid unnecessary drama. Just like OP said.

Obviously there is a reason for her breaking up with him. She didn't state but she must be concerned about something.

Some people do not accept rejection or break ups in a mature fashion so sometimes it is in the best interest of the other party to do what they believe is the safest, fastest and most effective way.

It's not about having "balls". If she didn't have the balls she would do nothing but ignore him or the slow fade.

Well if you're with a person you know him, and you should know the best way to part ways face to face, as you also said she didn't mention while she wants to leave him, yes she might have a reason but that reason might be stupid one when you can put some scence into a person before he does a stupid break up, i've seen people break up because of misunderstandings , games and many other stupid things, problem with many couples they can't speak openly with each other, and if the person isn't mature enough to handle face to face, just meet him say goodbye and go away, no need to say anything more unless you want to make it as best parting as possible if the person is mature enough he'll do the part..in this world people lack the ability to part face to face, thats why they hide behind technology, but face to face is different experience, it's real, it grows you more and gives you more confidence in talking about bad things, things you don't like in realtionships and shit like that, i see many people discusing things on forums but they don't talk about that with the other half? why? because they don't know how to, technology has taken this away from them, it gives you something, but always takes in return, each technology that is, 🙂 Real experience doesn't matter good or bad, must be felt in real life, face to face i'd say, but that's just me, never done break up over phone and never will, it's harder to part because you don't really feel that it's over where face to face emotions run 10x harder and you can move on faster, you become stronger and many other benefits i'd say 😄

Posted by wagtail

Posted by Virgiene
Planning to break up with my cappy man.. I want to do it face to face but i knew him, we will not entertain this kind of "drama".. He might just sit there and look like a lifeless statue and me like talking to a concrete..

Any Long term or serious relationship deserves face to face- if you have an iota of respect for yourself and for somebody who has invested time in you, it's basic manners.

Who cares what he will or will not tolerate. It's not exactly his call is it.

You are making the decision to break up with the man with or without his input. So supposedly his opinion is not a factor, just give him the respect any human being deserves.

Grow some ballsh 😎

And good luck! x

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Agreed.

Whatever uncomfortable-ness you feel is NOTHING to what your former SO will feel getting that kinda news. Balls up and do it face to face.

If they are far distance then phone or text preferred. Thanks.

Posted by AriesLove
If I feel I have to break up with you face to face then I really don't want to break up.

If I'm ready to break up I DONT want to see you. I'm trying to end the sh1t. Not look your a $ $ !

Let's say you cheated, or verbally abused me, or lied to me, or are disrespectful to me. Why do I want to look at you?!?

So I can accidentally slap the sh1t out of you.

??

In person or phone, texting is immature imo. You invested (physically, mentally, emotionally, etc) time into this guy, so atleast be a woman about it.

Posted by Skye


Why are you breaking up with him?

Because, he is stringing me a long for 9 months —

Posted by Virgiene
Planning to break up with my cappy man.. I want to do it face to face but i knew him, we will not entertain this kind of "drama".. He might just sit there and look like a lifeless statue and me like talking to a concrete..

Do it by text



Breaking up with somebody is bad enough, to listen to it face to face is adding insult to injury

i would die, if somebody broke up with me face to face and telling me the reasons!

I dont need to hear your reasons, simple: if you dont want me, thats enough

Posted by lovinglioness1115

Posted by starlover
Breaking up with someone by phone or text is horrible

Text is colder

+10000000

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horrible is to just disappear, because the other person will think about what they did wrong and if they should reach out more or confess love more, etc

just a simple text: its not working

I am not sure, if "sorry" should be a part of a break up text...... or something patronizing, like: you are a good person, but....... now that is horrible

Texting is the cowards way out. No.

Posted by boxcarmirnta
Texting is the cowards way out. No.

I would take a break up text any day, rather than a face to face: I dont want you

you dont want me, okey, no need to dwell on it

my ideal break-up: simple and clear

Me: We could be madly in love, regarding our personalities

Him: I like and love you, but I think not how you would expect

Me: Okey, you know I can be a romantic as well..... pity, how our favourite team in fotball lost yesterday

and then I go out and drink until I could forget everything

or I am releaved and go out and drink regardless 🙂

Pretty lame how many women have said do it over the phone or text but god forbid if a man breaks up with one of these women that way...they would be all over dxpnet, bitching and damning the man to hell lol

Posted by malloryor
Pretty lame how many women have said do it over the phone or text but god forbid if a man breaks up with one of these women that way...they would be all over dxpnet, bitching and damning the man to hell lol

I dont know, if you read my previous posts, but in my case is definitely not true

what I wrote above is how my 6 months "relationship" ended now (but with him wanting to meet up repeatedly after that, why? no way, you said what you wanted, I reacted okey, thats it)

my 5 years relationship (we lived together, so it was necessary to have face to face) he said: I fell in love with somebody Me: okey, can you move out? Him: i could move to my friend, but I dont have money Me: I lend you for your first payment, could you move out today or tomorrow? No drama, no tears

I am not exagerating, true stories

I blame my Aqua sun and Cappy mercury for this (my cancer moon and venus in pisces are deeply hurt, but you will never know it🙂 🙂 )

All these posts about text or call or face to face is depressing. Break ups are horrible ?

Posted by Pandora101

Posted by malloryor
Pretty lame how many women have said do it over the phone or text but god forbid if a man breaks up with one of these women that way...they would be all over dxpnet, bitching and damning the man to hell lol

I dont know, if you read my previous posts, but in my case is definitely not true

what I wrote above is how my 6 months "relationship" ended now (but with him wanting to meet up repeatedly after that, why? no way, you said what you wanted, I reacted okey, thats it)

my 5 years relationship (we lived together, so it was necessary to have face to face) he said: I fell in love with somebody Me: okey, can you move out? Him: i could move to my friend, but I dont have money Me: I lend you for your first payment, could you move out today or tomorrow? No drama, no tears

I am not exagerating, true stories

I blame my Aqua sun and Cappy mercury for this (my cancer moon and venus in pisces are deeply hurt, but you will never know it🙂 🙂 )

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Well that's great but you still have another human being and their feelings to be mindful of. Just because you move on without emotion does not mean the person does, people should be conscious of that, breaking up with someone via text or phone, ESPECIALLY for a narcissitic reason like "they'll just sit there and not show any emotion...any heartbreak, any fire to fight for me," is fucked up.

FUCKED UP.

Posted by malloryor

Posted by Pandora101

Posted by malloryor
Pretty lame how many women have said do it over the phone or text but god forbid if a man breaks up with one of these women that way...they would be all over dxpnet, bitching and damning the man to hell lol

I dont know, if you read my previous posts, but in my case is definitely not true

what I wrote above is how my 6 months "relationship" ended now (but with him wanting to meet up repeatedly after that, why? no way, you said what you wanted, I reacted okey, thats it)

my 5 years relationship (we lived together, so it was necessary to have face to face) he said: I fell in love with somebody Me: okey, can you move out? Him: i could move to my friend, but I dont have money Me: I lend you for your first payment, could you move out today or tomorrow? No drama, no tears

I am not exagerating, true stories

I blame my Aqua sun and Cappy mercury for this (my cancer moon and venus in pisces are deeply hurt, but you will never know it🙂 🙂 )

Well that's great but you still have another human being and their feelings to be mindful of. Just because you move on without emotion does not mean the person does, people should be conscious of that, breaking up with someone via text or phone, ESPECIALLY for a narcissitic reason like "they'll just sit there and not show any emotion...any heartbreak, any fire to fight for me," is fucked up.

FUCKED UP.

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another human being, who is breaking up with me? I should consider his feelings? Should I cry or beg, to satisfy this another persons´s feelings? Or what you are saying, I am not sure, if I understood.

I dont move on without emotion, I just dont like the drama break-ups.... I show no emotion when breaking up, but....... I go and drink after and end up drunk sh*t-face so many times, until my heart stops bleeding..... just the other person will never know 🙂

I am just saying: break up with me (if possible) via text and dont be patronizing (you are a good person, its my fault,etc)..... be simple and clear (it doesnt work) and I will be (okey), thats it

I do this in my break-ups as well..... (break ups initiated by me, I mean)

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
If they are far distance then phone or text preferred. Thanks.

You mean to tell me that if you were in a long distance relationship for a few years for example and you wanted to split with them you would do it by phone?' you would not have the decency to meet them half way and end it face to face?

There are no excuses... Face to face is all I have to say. Anything else is cowardly another reason why I don't enter relationships at all often...

People have low standards and are disrespectful and weak.

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I would but if we are breaking up and you are 2000 miles away. I don't want any memories or nothing. Out of mind and sight. Not meeting halfway because we didn't work it out. I would go if there was any means on saving my relationship and there was changes.

Posted by busyeyes88
As I can see from some of the responses here is another reason why this world is so fucked up!!!

Those weak cowards who can't be bothered to end a relationship face to face regardless of how the relationship ended or whether the relationship was good or bad etc, your turn will come.

We are all humans and should be treated as such regardless of the differences. Sure my relationships ended in a blaze of fire but they were all ended face to face.

Do what you will OP afterall self gratification and human decline is all we are seeing in the year 2016 where people lack any kind of respect for each other and morality is on a downhill decline and will get worse... A good reason to stay single these days as the majority of you on this thread have proved that relationships don't mean shite these days.

Have a good day OP.

Busy, from all the responses we can see, that we are all different. I really dont want to break up (receive break up) face to face, if I can avoid it. If I am breaking up with somebody and I sense they want to do it face to face, I do it.

But in my case: dont break up with me face to face, do it by text (or before mobile phones by handwritten letter) and leave me alone..... I dont want to hear your reasons (unless I can remedy them). If the reason is you dont love me anymore, then why I need to listen to it? so you can see my reaction? if I can have my reaction in private after your break up text, I would appreciate it.

Posted by Virgiene

will not entertain this kind of "drama"..

just sit there and look like a lifeless statue and me like talking to a concrete

Which means you've been very dramatic with your dealings with him ... to the point where he won't even respond to you when you talk to him.

You can break up with him, but, if you don't make adjustments to yourself in regards to you being overly dramatic, then you'll keep stepping in this same pile of shit over and over again.

Posted by Virgiene

Posted by Skye


Why are you breaking up with him?

Because, he is stringing me a long for 9 months —

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I have the sneaky suspicion that you dont' want to break up, rather, you want to impose more of your drama on him and that's why you want to text.

You want to continue to manipulate him, to make him believe you are leaving him with intentions of getting him to come chase after you.

Here's the Opening Post on the Cap board 3 weeks ago ....

Posted by Virgiene
i have been with a cappy guy for almost 9 months now and till now, it is not yet official.. So I don't know what are we, bff or fwb. I know he likes me coz he do these things for me like cook dinner, change oil my car, call me regularly every night, text me all day long , makes me laugh and to make the story short, he wants to make sure i am okey. My question, how will i know if i am the right girl for him? I like this guy a lot and i have read that cappy guy take it too slow..Does he like/ love me too or he is not decided yet if I am the one. Please help all cappies out there..

so, this means that you have no clue what is going on in your life, even as you live it.

You say he is stringing you along, yet, what you describe is your ignorance to his gestures.

If I spent 9 months showing you how much I care for you .. and you're sitting there with your thumb up your ass, not knowing what is left or right, not being able to recognize me and the things I do for you ... then yeah, I'd just be a brick wall to you eventually.

why should he pay any more attention to you when you are incapable of appreciating him? You even said that he called/texted everyday, and went out of his way to do things for you and spend time with you ..... and you never even noticed.

You have to ask other people if he likes you?

seriously?

You are really THAT clueless?

Virgo's are horrendous in relatinships, and here's an example. No matter what you do for them, or how wonderfully you make them feel about the relationship ..... you might as well be courting a stump.

People need to go read those threads that were linked ...... she says over and over about how nice, and attentive this cap man is to her, and has been to her the whole time.

so, for her to come in here and state that he's stringing her along is utter bullshit, and it's her manipulating you to play on your sympathies.

Or, maybe my first assumption is correct and she's just ignorant.

Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by malloryor
Pretty lame how many women have said do it over the phone or text but god forbid if a man breaks up with one of these women that way...they would be all over dxpnet, bitching and damning the man to hell lol

Didn't read your whole thread...isn't that how things ended with the aries that you were speaking to? Is it different because OP situation was longer or more of an established relationship...in either situation there is a human on the other side like you said right?

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No. A. We are still dating B. We were dating as in not even a month at the time, so why would I call him up, invite him out just to break up with him when we are not bf and gf.

Nice try.

Posted by P-Angel

Posted by Virgiene

Posted by Skye


Why are you breaking up with him?

Because, he is stringing me a long for 9 months —

I have the sneaky suspicion that you dont' want to break up, rather, you want to impose more of your drama on him and that's why you want to text.

You want to continue to manipulate him, to make him believe you are leaving him with intentions of getting him to come chase after you.

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I never been a drama queen to him.. I have been honest with him about my feeling/emotions which i think i scared him.. I told him i am not a psychic.. I don't know how to read minds and if he is not going to tell me how he feels will I know!? I know cappy man don't do that coz they are more of actions but i told him, once in a while he has to express emotions.. I reciprocated whatever he have done to me. Cook his tavorite dinner, massage him and support him in his studies and dreams. All i want from him is to label our relationship so my insecurities will go away but that one he won't give me..

Break up with them just like the way you prefer the other person to break the news.

to each it's own. I personally would rather a face to face but I have don't it via text and call before. Kind of depends on the love, respect and investment in the other person involved. IMO.

If he is statue just pack and leave in silence.