How would you feel?

A good friend of mine told me that on Weds her friend text her to ask where a good first date spot was. Her date just so happened to be the Aries I’ve mentioned here a few times.

Just to clarify this again before I get rude messages. The things I say here are just a sounding board for me. I don’t even run these things past friends usually. I use this place as a tool. That being said. I never mentioned dating to the Aries. Never asked him his feelings. Never requested any information from him in that regard. Although it crossed my mind, I decided not to.

That leads me to Friday morning. He texts me right when he wakes up. “Hey, I need to be straight up with you. I really like you and I’ve developed strong feelings for you. It’s very intense and scary for me. I’ve freaked myself out. I found myself refraining from texting you yesterday and how I feel hit me. I think it’s cool, it’s been amazing, but I needed to tell you.” My response was “ Honestly, I feel the same but I’m cautious about developing feelings for someone who might be emotionally unavailable “........ He then switches the tone that “yeah, this might be too intense for right now.” Which I didn’t know if he was doing because of my reply. I was just being honest, but I wasn’t rejecting him. So, after a little more discussion I say “if this is too intense for you like you stated maybe we should take a timeout on hanging”....... he says he doesn’t want to do that but maybe us staying over at the casino will be too much and we should grab a coffee..... I say “Maybe we should just focus on ourselves for a bit and reconnect when it’s better timing to lead to less confusion” he goes “maybe a week? But I’m sure I’ll be texting you by tomorrow anyways haha.” I decline coffee and say I don’t know what a week will fix and that I feel confused by the conversation. Basically I say I want no part of it until he knows what’s up and can be emotionally available.



I have a few questions. One- if you were out on a date the day after seeing me. Why even open this up? Why go out of your way to tell me you like me more than a friend and basically complicate things? It just wasn’t necessary.

Two- I feel like my response changed his entire demeanor of the conversation. But it was a real concern I had. But perhaps the outcome was heading that way anyways? It just doesn’t seem like he needed to tell me all this if his intent was to not date. I never asked. I had planned not to, after bouncing ideas off this forum.



Three- it doesn’t seem straight up to not tell me about this date. Especially after telling me you’re falling for me. No, he doesn’t owe me that... but in a direct and honest situation I feel he should have mentioned it. Or am I wrong to feel that way? He has gone out of his way to tell me he isn’t dating actually.



I’m confused by the whole situation.

This was a little too long. I hate long posts. Sorrryyyyyy!

Hey, I don't know the whole story... are you guys dating? If yes, currently or used to?

Posted by Fragrance

Hey, I don't know the whole story... are you guys dating? If yes, currently or used to?

Just friends really. With a strong attraction to one another.

I didn’t know about the date until yesterday. He went on it Weds. Told me his feelings Friday. I can’t really bring it up because my friend divulged this information to me and asked that I not mention her. I also don’t know if I’d seem nutty for saying it.

He did say that he has strong feelings for you and your response made him feel rejected. Now he is playing like he doesn’t care much and He is making you pay for it.

Very Aries

Posted by nanobot

I wouldn't understand how he can allegedly have such strong and intense feelings for you, and then be dating other people.

To me, it sounds very contrived and like a cop out. "I'm feeling way too intense about you so I need to stop with you now and date other people."

Nahhh. I've never heard of anything like it before.

First of all- love your new picture.

Second- Right?! But the thing I don’t get is. He didn’t need a cop out. I never put him in a situation where he’d feel he needed to explain anything at all to me. We hadn’t really text in two days. Never discussed feelings. Never discussed us.

The way my mind works.... I don’t get this. Haha

Posted by heliumfiasco

Posted by Fragrance

Hey, I don't know the whole story... are you guys dating? If yes, currently or used to?

Just friends really. With a strong attraction to one another.

click to expand

Ok, my reasoning is probably immature but why not give my two cents... I think your communication is too vague.

I believe he likes you, you're not just any woman. you're a friend AND there's chemistry between you. but you know aries males, they can be honest yet lack integrity without being aware of it. Although I find your response to him poised and considerate, if I were you, I'd have implied about him dating other people in a playful manner. Show him you're not a fool... aries loves sweet talk, so make him understand he needs to be more convincing

I understand aries nature and I strongly doubt it he'd write something like that to a woman he doesn't really care about

As an Aries I usually can’t see anyone else when I’m really into someone. I try but I end up getting stuck on one person. I hate it. So I find him weird. Doesn’t sound genuine.

Posted by bkbella86

As an Aries I usually can’t see anyone else when I’m really into someone. I try but I end up getting stuck on one person. I hate it. So I find him weird. Doesn’t sound genuine.

Yeah he told me that night he was meeting a “friend” after going to his parents house. The text my friend showed me from the woman said “where is a good first date spot?”

At this point he has no idea idea I know.

My cancer friend seems to think he went out with the woman to try and see if he should be focusing on dating, but text me two days later because he realized his feelings. I don’t know if I buy this scenario. I’m sticking with my original plan of backing away for awhile which I told him prior. He’s obviously a mess.