When your friend’s friend is an asshole

Has anyone delt with this?

How do you cope?

As a 35 yr old with health problems I have realized that time is precious and I no longer want to waste it spending time with people who drain my energy or who don’t treat me well….

so I’ve started cutting people out of my life and distancing myself from friends who I actually like that are still friends and who regulalry hang out with the people who have been an asshole to me when they weren’t around.

I’m a little sad about it…but yeah just texted a friend today about how/why I can’t really go to group hangs anymore even if she’s there because I’m fed up with the passive aggresiveness and bullying from their mutual friends ( without naming names because I didn’t want to put my good friend in the middle but yeah

Really f*cking sucks.

When it’s a matter of respect and dignity you put that over everything

Posted by roti
When it’s a matter of respect and dignity you put that over everything

I really love that.

Posted by Adreamuponwaking

Posted by roti
When it’s a matter of respect and dignity you put that over everything

I really love that.

click to expand

You’re welcome

Posted by StubbornSag
You have way too many people if you atill have people to cut off at that age 😂 think I've had that stage when I was 20 up to 24 tops😂

Yeah I’m a late bloomer but to be fair the people I am referring to in this post belong to a new group of people I have been hanging out with this past year.

In this particular group there about 4 people that I have issues with.

2 out of the 4 are people who committed the most grave instances ( repeated emotional/psycholgical abuse and bullying) I have known less than a year.

The other two who had less offenses but were still jerks I have know for 7 and 4 years respectively ( though I have only seen and hung out with both of them less than a handful of times so I wouldn’t say we were close or anything. )

The 7 yr acquantaince was a bit racist / committed a few microaggressions when I last saw them and betrayed me in a few ways including throwing me under the bus by sharing how I felt regarding mistreatment regarding one of the two people I mentioned above to that person (because they were actively dating them although I didn’t know it at the time).

That sounds like about half the group. I learned lessons about how to handle bullies early on. I can't say it's all me cause once, LOL, Libra mom told me "you gotta draw blood baby." She meant that literally... and I did... everytime. That didn't help me in my adult life though. Besides,Libra was always self-employed... she didn't mind jail. Funny thing is she was more strategic than anything... And, I had to remember her strategies and how she navigates an entire community... She was/is masterful. Now, she's not quite like she was cause she's old...and I help her and remind her that it's what she taught me...LOL.

You need allies and advisors and the are best when it's "family."

All I see every time is 'when you your friends asshole'