Heart break and death (Page 2)

lol

Posted by Rabbit

Posted by Impulsv

Posted by Rabbit
Early 20s

Hilarious rabbit!! Me too

Yeah but I totally convinced a Virgo i was actually worthy of her time lol.

That was a superhuman feat.

click to expand

lulz

pretty sure the convicing part never ended.

~hugs~

Let it hurt. It will come and go in waves. Eventually the waves get farther apart and smaller. Ending a relationship is a bit like losing someone to death, so it's totally normal to feel the hurt, feel the loss, etc. Add the feelings of disappointment and betrayal, and it's a cocktail of shitty feelings. It takes time to process it, so vent when you have to vent, and sleep when you have to sleep. Just don't fall to drinking/drugs to cope or numb yourself. That's a fast slippery slope.

Posted by Rabbit

Posted by Damnata

Posted by Rabbit

Posted by Impulsv

Posted by Rabbit
Early 20s

Hilarious rabbit!! Me too

Yeah but I totally convinced a Virgo i was actually worthy of her time lol.

That was a superhuman feat.

lulz

pretty sure the convicing part never ended.

It's a daily grind!

click to expand

Posted by MoonArtist
~hugs~

Let it hurt. It will come and go in waves. Eventually the waves get farther apart and smaller. Ending a relationship is a bit like losing someone to death, so it's totally normal to feel the hurt, feel the loss, etc. Add the feelings of disappointment and betrayal, and it's a cocktail of shitty feelings. It takes time to process it, so vent when you have to vent, and sleep when you have to sleep. Just don't fall to drinking/drugs to cope or numb yourself. That's a fast slippery slope.

I know. I want a drink so bad right now though... ugh

How have you dealt with it?

Posted by Rabbit

Posted by Damnata

Posted by Rabbit

Posted by Damnata

Posted by Rabbit

Posted by Impulsv

Posted by Rabbit
Early 20s

Hilarious rabbit!! Me too

Yeah but I totally convinced a Virgo i was actually worthy of her time lol.

That was a superhuman feat.

lulz

pretty sure the convicing part never ended.

It's a daily grind!

You act like I don't enjoy the torture.

Virgo please...

click to expand

You got the roles wrong in that gif.

Posted by Rabbit
Alcohol is never the solution...even if chemically it IS a solution.

It's also a SOLVEnt...

Fuck it.

Go have a drink.

Lol!!

Posted by Twodrinkminimum
It's taking a toll, can't lie. I'm very obsessive though. Idle time is my enemy. Staying busy is all I can do. Going out with friends takes my mind off of it but once I'm left alone again, the thoughts creep back in.

I've been through it before though so I know it's not going away anytime soon but I do know that eventually it will, so I guess I'm content in knowing that it's just a temporary state of mind.

I give myself a time limit to wallow and then when my time is up I have to move on until the next day.

I'm incredible obsessive. Scorp sun, Taurus moon, Virgo rising.... I'm built to let no little detail go...

*incredibly

Posted by Twodrinkminimum
Whassat mean? I'm an 8th house sun aries.

It's hard to explain. I appreciate what you're saying, but I can't just not think about it. It's like... eating my soul. I know that sounds stupid and dramatic, but it's what it feels like. If I could schedule a time I would, but I can't get away from it. It's all consuming.

Posted by Twodrinkminimum
My grandpa died 2 years ago and one of my clients asked me about it yesterday and I broke down like it had just happened. I'm not saying that I shouldn't still be hurt but at this point, I think I should be able to talk about it and keep my composure. But motherfuck...I could not. And she had lost her husband of nearly 50 years around the same time and she was okay. Not me. I had to excuse myself -_-

Wow, that's horrible, I'm so sorry.

Posted by Rabbit

Posted by KVZZMIR11
Go for beer, and I assure you will meet someone else who is heart broke.

Yeah but it might be another guy...

click to expand

Fucking Rabbit, lol!

Posted by ScorpioStarGazer
I'm so sorry to hear this. Good luck to you and may you soon be able to find some peace.

Thank you.

Posted by Impulsv

Posted by Shruikan

Posted by Twodrinkminimum
It's taking a toll, can't lie. I'm very obsessive though. Idle time is my enemy. Staying busy is all I can do. Going out with friends takes my mind off of it but once I'm left alone again, the thoughts creep back in.

I've been through it before though so I know it's not going away anytime soon but I do know that eventually it will, so I guess I'm content in knowing that it's just a temporary state of mind.

I give myself a time limit to wallow and then when my time is up I have to move on until the next day.

I'm incredible obsessive. Scorp sun, Taurus moon, Virgo rising.... I'm built to let no little detail go...

Mm almost like me scorp sun taurus moon n cap rising. I blame it on our moon. Just give urself time it's been years for me n finally have joy.

click to expand

Years... ugh... I figured.

No, I know you're right. I don't get over things quickly at all. I lie about it pretty quickly though.

Thank you for helping Impulsv. It means a lot. 🙂

Posted by Shruikan
My relationship with the woman I thought I would marry has ended. I feel empty and sad. I feel like I don't want to live anymore and it's strange feeling. I've only felt like this one other time in my life. Any advice?

When one relationship ends, another one is in the horizon. if you feel empty then its time to start filling it again. and what better way to celebrate being single again? getting back to what you love doing again or get a new hobby. Take out that bucketlist you have before and start doing all of it

Posted by chococream

Posted by Shruikan
My relationship with the woman I thought I would marry has ended. I feel empty and sad. I feel like I don't want to live anymore and it's strange feeling. I've only felt like this one other time in my life. Any advice?

When one relationship ends, another one is in the horizon. if you feel empty then its time to start filling it again. and what better way to celebrate being single again? getting back to what you love doing again or get a new hobby. Take out that bucketlist you have before and start doing all of it

click to expand

Well, music is my main hobby. But I feel so empty it's hard to find the motivation to do anything. I wanna play, but it's hard. I'm not sure how to start.

A German friend that I know he comes and visits me has a bullsh*t told me life is always worth living he says nothing is bad enough to take your life for, things always improve they never stay bad. He told me that when I was having a rough time in my life the economy was tanking I was a self employed contractor my work was disappearing, I had creditors on my back, stress from my other job piling on me. I spent many days and hours thinking how I could fail so miserably I don't like failing. My German friend was right, things have changed its better today then it was back then when I was having troubles.

Anytime I'm having a rough patch in my life I think of what my German friend told me I'm a believer now that things do get better.

Posted by Shruikan

Posted by MoonArtist
~hugs~

Let it hurt. It will come and go in waves. Eventually the waves get farther apart and smaller. Ending a relationship is a bit like losing someone to death, so it's totally normal to feel the hurt, feel the loss, etc. Add the feelings of disappointment and betrayal, and it's a cocktail of shitty feelings. It takes time to process it, so vent when you have to vent, and sleep when you have to sleep. Just don't fall to drinking/drugs to cope or numb yourself. That's a fast slippery slope.

I know. I want a drink so bad right now though... ugh

click to expand

I have a rule. Never drink when down, only to celebrate. It's a natural downer, and a mood amplifier. Then there's the nasty part of liking how it takes the edge off, and then leaning towards it more frequently. Slippery slope!

Posted by Shruikan

Posted by chococream

Posted by Shruikan
My relationship with the woman I thought I would marry has ended. I feel empty and sad. I feel like I don't want to live anymore and it's strange feeling. I've only felt like this one other time in my life. Any advice?

When one relationship ends, another one is in the horizon. if you feel empty then its time to start filling it again. and what better way to celebrate being single again? getting back to what you love doing again or get a new hobby. Take out that bucketlist you have before and start doing all of it

Well, music is my main hobby. But I feel so empty it's hard to find the motivation to do anything. I wanna play, but it's hard. I'm not sure how to start.

click to expand

You feel empty, play something empty. You feel pain, play pain. You feel rage, tear the fuck up out of the strings and play rage! This is art, it's the voice to emotion, and oddly enough, it's sometimes a means to healing, and working through things.

Posted by Shruikan

Posted by chococream

Posted by Shruikan
My relationship with the woman I thought I would marry has ended. I feel empty and sad. I feel like I don't want to live anymore and it's strange feeling. I've only felt like this one other time in my life. Any advice?

When one relationship ends, another one is in the horizon. if you feel empty then its time to start filling it again. and what better way to celebrate being single again? getting back to what you love doing again or get a new hobby. Take out that bucketlist you have before and start doing all of it

Well, music is my main hobby. But I feel so empty it's hard to find the motivation to do anything. I wanna play, but it's hard. I'm not sure how to start.

click to expand

I play the Cielo and Piano and since like you I am on a mend from heartbreak, and music has been my escape for most of it. Been playing over and over again. Imagine a sad version of head shoulders knees and toes for an example. Good thing my 5 year old think its awesome and dance with it or else I will agree with my friends that I am hopeless. 😄

I have a rule. Never drink when down, only to celebrate.

😄 I agree.. imagine that I thought the same thing when the day I went for drinks with my girls a week after the break up. Happy days are here... and I think I will celebrate 3 years more.

I agree. If you say she doesn't know why she lied then it sounds like those are lies that you get messed up in from being young and naive and troubled and selfish. How old is she? This is common in young folk. We all fuck up and do stupid shit when young. Sounds like you're the one who is messing up the relationship you guy could be having. Learn how to trust her and I hope she's still not lying though. I hope she's grown from that tho. If she hasn't just dead it. But if she has try communicating your fears and see what happens. Don't let your own fears stop you from the love of your life. Because if your reacting like this I know what your heart feels like and it's not worth going through just because she fucked up in the past and you can't get over it

Posted by Shruikan

Well, music is my main hobby. But I feel so empty it's hard to find the motivation to do anything. I wanna play, but it's hard. I'm not sure how to start.

I hear "Theory of a Dead Man" is good music to listen to after a break up...but only for the angry stage which comes after the heartbreak/sad stage you are in now.

Regarding the convo w/Rabbit about drinking...eat a big meal, (pretend that meal is the pain in your gut)then do shot after shot and regurgitate all that crap out and cleanse your soul! Cry, puke, cry some more, play this song:

Then in the anger stage play this one:

...and remember

EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON

Posted by chococream

I have a rule. Never drink when down, only to celebrate.

😄 I agree.. imagine that I thought the same thing when the day I went for drinks with my girls a week after the break up. Happy days are here... and I think I will celebrate 3 years more.

I tend to use it a crutch sometimes, which is definitely not good. :/ I should use the celebrate rule.

I'd like to be able to forgive and forget, but even when I try to forgive I can't forget and it eats at me. I don't know how to go about healing that so I could feel better again. How do you learn to do that?

Posted by LetltB
...and remember

EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON

I keep telling myself this. I just feel like I'm drowning.

Maybe crying and puking will help. Lol

You'd be amazed... 🙂

Posted by MoonArtist

Posted by Shruikan

Posted by chococream

Posted by Shruikan
My relationship with the woman I thought I would marry has ended. I feel empty and sad. I feel like I don't want to live anymore and it's strange feeling. I've only felt like this one other time in my life. Any advice?

When one relationship ends, another one is in the horizon. if you feel empty then its time to start filling it again. and what better way to celebrate being single again? getting back to what you love doing again or get a new hobby. Take out that bucketlist you have before and start doing all of it

Well, music is my main hobby. But I feel so empty it's hard to find the motivation to do anything. I wanna play, but it's hard. I'm not sure how to start.

You feel empty, play something empty. You feel pain, play pain. You feel rage, tear the fuck up out of the strings and play rage! This is art, it's the voice to emotion, and oddly enough, it's sometimes a means to healing, and working through things.

click to expand

Very true. I need to embrace the hurt and turn it into something constructive. I feel like I have no drive right now though. It's hard just to go to work.

Posted by chococream

Posted by Shruikan

Posted by chococream

Posted by Shruikan
My relationship with the woman I thought I would marry has ended. I feel empty and sad. I feel like I don't want to live anymore and it's strange feeling. I've only felt like this one other time in my life. Any advice?

When one relationship ends, another one is in the horizon. if you feel empty then its time to start filling it again. and what better way to celebrate being single again? getting back to what you love doing again or get a new hobby. Take out that bucketlist you have before and start doing all of it

Well, music is my main hobby. But I feel so empty it's hard to find the motivation to do anything. I wanna play, but it's hard. I'm not sure how to start.

I play the Cielo and Piano and since like you I am on a mend from heartbreak, and music has been my escape for most of it. Been playing over and over again. Imagine a sad version of head shoulders knees and toes for an example. Good thing my 5 year old think its awesome and dance with it or else I will agree with my friends that I am hopeless. 😄

click to expand

That's awesome. I play piano too. It's one of the best ways to let emotion out.

Posted by RainDancer88
Heartbreak is great place to discover who you are and who you want to be. It humbles us if we let it happen naturally.

I had wondered earlier is everyone needs a heart break to rid love of an ugly plague,

or is our real first heartbreak a loss of our innocence?

Either way. Resolution and new beginnings start with you.

I have to find out who I truly am alone now I guess. One of the things I miss the most was the feeling that I wouldn't have to face things alone anymore. It's hard to go back to thinking that I need to protect me and only me again.

Posted by tiziani
If you ask me forgiveness is a fool's errand 9 times out of ten. I agree use the time you have in a way that's true to how you feel.

I feel like it's fool's errand as well, but I feel like the vast majority of people don't see it that way. I want to improve as a human. If learning to forgive makes me a more complete person, I want to learn how to do it.

Posted by TwirlingStrawberry
oh...and crying and puking *does* help too 😉

Well, I've got the crying part down. I haven't eaten for like two days so maybe I should do that so I can puke too.

I lose my appetite completely. If I'm heart broken my body goes into this strange preservation mode. It's much worse this time. I don't want or crave anything at all.

Did she lie to you recently or are you putting yourself through self motivated torture?

Posted by StarChild63
Did she lie to you recently or are you putting yourself through self motivated torture?

It's been about a year or so since the last time I caught her in a lie.

Posted by KVZZMIR11

Posted by Shruikan
I lose my appetite completely. If I'm heart broken my body goes into this strange preservation mode. It's much worse this time. I don't want or crave anything at all.

That is great.
I turned down all my bad habits shortly after my break up (drinking, smoking, even lost cravings for fapping).

Video games, DXPing, and classic literature...do them!

click to expand

I'm just going through motions right now. I want to have a drink and a smoke, but I don't really want to. But I might. But I don't really want to. If any of that makes sense.

Posted by Shruikan

Posted by StarChild63
Did she lie to you recently or are you putting yourself through self motivated torture?

It's been about a year or so since the last time I caught her in a lie.

click to expand

This is the problem? This is it? That was a year ago! You sound like she cheated on you recently. Learn how to forgive and then forget it. Make a new future with her. Don't throw away a perfectly good relationship because of that. She also needs to assure you she is worth the trust too

Posted by StarChild63

Posted by Shruikan

Posted by StarChild63
Did she lie to you recently or are you putting yourself through self motivated torture?

It's been about a year or so since the last time I caught her in a lie.

This is the problem? This is it? That was a year ago! You sound like she cheated on you recently. Learn how to forgive and then forget it. Make a new future with her. Don't throw away a perfectly good relationship because of that. She also needs to assure you she is worth the trust too

click to expand

No that is not only it. I said that last one I caught her in was about a year ago. There's many more things that happened, but I don't feel comfortable airing what she did without her being here to defend herself. I find that disrespectful.

I understand what you're saying though. I want to just move on, but I get the sick feeling inside when I think about what happened. It's... I don't know. It eats at me. And if I ask her about it she gets defensive. It leaves me feeling even worse than before.

I read somewhere that the amount of pain/sadness/frustration/bitterness/etc. you feel after a relationship ends is directly proportional the extent you sold out or compromised yourself during the relationship.

Looking back, I'd have to say that rings true for me.

My advice would be to sit down and seriously ask yourself: Is it the loss of her you are mourning? Or the loss of yourself?

Wow.... I've never thought about that before. I'm so lost in my head I'm not even sure how to answer.

From the neighbour thread:

Posted by xy
... Scorpio sun with Taurus moon can be extremely resistant to change and that may be your biggest roadblock in life. ...

Avoid drugs and alcohol.

I hate assuming....you gave no real reason for the break up yet you seek solace here in getting over a heartbreak. Not sure why your heartbroken. I'm sure she since she is a Libra is out and about having a great time as they do. Your here talking about not eating, drinking, puking..WTH—

If she was the ONE as you put it the lie she told over a year ago wouldn't be still wearing down on you. You would have discussed it and let it the hell go because she had your heart. Love is unconditional you accept the good, the bad, the ugly and all that slimy crap in between if it can be worked out. It takes sacrifice and lots of compromises. Since you couldn't do any of these and a lie was eating at you for over a year..think about that a year...you made love, cooked, went out, slept etc..all the while you kept a wall up due to a lie she said...did you really love her or was it just for her to fill a void for something else wrong within you?

Get out of the emotional aspect of this and tear it apart logically. You will see what was going on and you will recognize that it was all for the best. So drag your head today...but tomorrow get a new outlook on your life and keep it pushing...

I think his problem is kind of similar to the oscillation Chris Brown has.

Shrui was aware of some lies (or wrong-doings?) right at the beginning of their communication. But he let the love grow.

So he has one personality which makes him act "carpe diem".

And he has the other personality which makes him check and feel fear and want to put an end to it all.

No wonder that the 2nd personality got active after he has spent much time with her. The 2nd wants to save us from losing ourselves to a partner. Even if she was a Cancer, even if she has not told lies, he'd had fear and would gotten panic. At least this is what we know from astro texts about Scorpio and from Holleywood movies about "getting cold feet".

on-off-generation.

Posted by TwirlingStrawberry
maybe puking is a scorpio thing. *shrugs*

when I'm heartbroken.....my stomach hurts. It's like this knot that won't go away for awhile.

I physically *feel* sick.

I agree... its also like when im in relationship i get fat and then when i get my heartbroken i lose all that weight in a week its weird.

Posted by Shruikan
I lose my appetite completely. If I'm heart broken my body goes into this strange preservation mode. It's much worse this time. I don't want or crave anything at all.

click to expand

its amazing how your body can endure.

Posted by tiziani

Posted by KVZZMIR11
...And delete all facebook, twitter, and etc.

Social media make break ups feel BILLION x tortorous no matter how much you want up to date.

Yeah I strongly agree with this, couldn't agree with it more if i tried actually

click to expand

+ 1 its a golden rule really... you do all of the deleting and everything when your working on letting go.