two scorpios dating.....

Go on a few amazing dates everything is effortless and easy then bam the male scorpio decides to make the relationship complicated at the peak of being great together....

random convo plays out

him: I'm not ready to commit yet

me: I'm not asking for commitment after 2 months, BUT I'm not dating just for the heck of it, I want to see where it goes, if it doesn't progress to a relationship after 6 months max then I'm out.

him: ok I understand

me: I think it will be a good idea to keep our options open until you are sure.

him: get's conflicted and upset and says "oh, I didn't think we were playing that game."

me: What game? there is none if you are unsure about me it is best to be honest and keep our options open.

him: ok (still upset but tries to hide it)

me: face palms dammit he just had to be "complicated" and now we are in limbo

Still continues to date but now we both are slowing things down, calls are less, hangouts are less, no sex anymore. I guess we are both paranoid now.

Sigh* when it's good it is great but when it is bad or my. Even though we continue to have "honest communication" the power struggle is full forced. Why must scorpios purposely ruin their relationships or potential ones—!!! I'm ready to walk away I don't have time for power games. What was so simple has become difficult and I'm done with that shit in my life.

@bittercupcake Yes I totally agree. I think everything was going well until we both caught feelings. I noticed he started assuming I was going to hurt him like one time I asked him to help me with something and he said that reminded him of people trying to use him 😢. He definitely became insecure which is why he says he not ready to commit but you can't expect me to not see anyone else while he make up his mind. Anyway he disappeared on me for a week after we had a seemingly great date. I will see him soon (it's been two weeks) and I will definitely let him know that he is just making things difficult and unless he can put his insecurities to the side I'm walking. I took a break dating before I met him so I worked out some of my past hurt and issues but clearly his is purposely ruining a good thing we have.

Posted by oxygenthief
@bittercupcake Yes I totally agree. I think everything was going well until we both caught feelings. I noticed he started assuming I was going to hurt him like one time I asked him to help me with something and he said that reminded him of people trying to use him 😢. He definitely became insecure which is why he says he not ready to commit but you can't expect me to not see anyone else while he make up his mind. Anyway he disappeared on me for a week after we had a seemingly great date. I will see him soon (it's been two weeks) and I will definitely let him know that he is just making things difficult and unless he can put his insecurities to the side I'm walking. I took a break dating before I met him so I worked out some of my past hurt and issues but clearly his is purposely ruining a good thing we have.

You’re dating and already sleeping with each other within this two month period without first establishing commitment. That’s a potential issue right there.

However, when he voices his concern over not feeling ready to commit to a relationship after two months you then state you want to keep your options open to see other people while still dating and fucking this guy.

He probably assumes you want to date and fuck other guys as well as him and it’s made him uncomfortable... as it would if boot were on other foot.

I think you pulled the rug out from under the feet too soon on this one. Possibly because you want to ‘protect’ yourself from wasting your time or getting hurt. Why do you feel the need to date others after already taking the plunge withthis guy for two months?

He was being honest with you. It would have been more helpful to ask him what his concerns were about commiting and working together to build on what you already have to make a good foundation for a committed relationship.

But you just prefer to date others and blame him for how things are.

Is he dating other women?

I’ve dated a lot and I’ve realized if a guy doesn’t want commitment it’s most likely because he wants to enjoy being free to do whatever and whoever he wants. Is that how you want to start a relationship with a man? Knowing he was fucking other girls while fucking you. Sounds shitty because it is.

Let me clarify

On our first date we both discussed what we wanted. We both agreed that we liked each other and wanted to see where it goes. When I told him to keep options open I clarified to him go on other dates and I told him let’s hold off on sex for that very same reason so he doesn’t think I would be fucking him and who ever else.

Yes he is concerned about his freedom but if we not exclusive then potentionally dating other people was best. I learned that putting your eggs in one basket too soon is never good.

After that discussion we were back on the same page. Please save your sex judgments. There are many people who slept together early and are in committed relationship. One of my friends slept with her husband on the first date. Another friend of mine was sleeping with her now bf for about 6 months (while she was dating other people) and he still wanted commitment. Some men only wants sex and some men see beyond that!!

Anyway so yeah we fixed that problem and everything was smooth sailing after that. I know he told me his November was busy his friends and family was visiting, birthdays etc. so when I called him after a week went by he told me a lot was going on and he had to go to a funeral. In his absence that’s when I started to think I should just walk away just by him being complicated.

There was actions he did that made things complicated that I left out but he did apologize. I think we are both Scorpio wussies who just add scared to be hurt. I have to be honest we both have been hesitant in thinking either one of us will repeat our past. I think the talk we need to have is to listen to understand each other not to just respond.

Yeah so when we went MIA I thought we were done and that’s when he called me to meet up in the next few days.

Posted by oxygenthief
Let me clarify

On our first date we both discussed what we wanted. We both agreed that we liked each other and wanted to see where it goes. When I told him to keep options open I clarified to him go on other dates and I told him let’s hold off on sex for that very same reason so he doesn’t think I would be fucking him and who ever else.

Yes he is concerned about his freedom but if we not exclusive then potentionally dating other people was best. I learned that putting your eggs in one basket too soon is never good.

After that discussion we were back on the same page. Please save your sex judgments. There are many people who slept together early and are in committed relationship. One of my friends slept with her husband on the first date. Another friend of mine was sleeping with her now bf for about 6 months (while she was dating other people) and he still wanted commitment. Some men only wants sex and some men see beyond that!!

Anyway so yeah we fixed that problem and everything was smooth sailing after that. I know he told me his November was busy his friends and family was visiting, birthdays etc. so when I called him after a week went by he told me a lot was going on and he had to go to a funeral. In his absence that’s when I started to think I should just walk away just by him being complicated.

... "so when I called him after a week went by "...... hmmm

...."Some men only wants sex and some men see beyond that!! " ........ people who are ready see beyond that..... most people who are dating are hung up on their exes and are not emotionally available.... they want to keep their options open not to be free, but because they are really not ready... even if they say on the first date, what they want.... .but they dont know if they want it with you (not with you personally, but with the other person generally)

hard to say what will come out of this.... but 2 months is really early stages for big words about commitments, etc

many people had sex on a first date and many people got married after a short time, and its working for them..... it seems its not really working for you two..... sparse communication (like a week with no communication) is not a good thing, imho.....but you will see

dont do anything harsh or premature decisions.... you two are still getting to know each other

@Pandora101 thank you for your response. Yeah that was the first time that happened a week without Talking. Our usual routine was talking during the week and seeing each other at least once a week. If he needed to rethink about what he wanted then he could have at least let me know instead of going MIA. I never mentioned him to him I wanted full blown commitment after 2 months I told him that it is too early to tell and it should take no more than 6 months to know if you are ready to committ. Some opinions on here are saying I’m wrong for mentioning keeping options open but I disagree. You can’t tell a woman you not ready and then think she is just going to wait on you. I guess we should have clarified as if he meant like not at all or it’s just too early to tell. I took it as not at all which is why I said options open. At first we started acting like a couple and then I noticed he started acting insecure which is now why I think he said he’s not ready. He kept saying “I need to get my shit together” I think he meant his emotions. I never thought about asking if he has completely healed from his previous relationship but he said he took a 6 month break from dating after his last relationship and I took 2 months off prior to meeting him. When talking to him he has a round about way of saying things and I’m more blunt so I tend to pull the whole truth out of him. Anyway not that it matters but he is a Scorpio/Sag cusp (Nov 21) with a Taurus moon and I’m a Scorpio (Oct 30) with a Leo moon.

Posted by oxygenthief
@Pandora101 thank you for your response. Yeah that was the first time that happened a week without Talking. Our usual routine was talking during the week and seeing each other at least once a week. If he needed to rethink about what he wanted then he could have at least let me know instead of going MIA. I never mentioned him to him I wanted full blown commitment after 2 months I told him that it is too early to tell and it should take no more than 6 months to know if you are ready to committ. Some opinions on here are saying I’m wrong for mentioning keeping options open but I disagree. You can’t tell a woman you not ready and then think she is just going to wait on you. I guess we should have clarified as if he meant like not at all or it’s just too early to tell. I took it as not at all which is why I said options open. At first we started acting like a couple and then I noticed he started acting insecure which is now why I think he said he’s not ready. He kept saying “I need to get my shit together” I think he meant his emotions. I never thought about asking if he has completely healed from his previous relationship but he said he took a 6 month break from dating after his last relationship and I took 2 months off prior to meeting him. When talking to him he has a round about way of saying things and I’m more blunt so I tend to pull the whole truth out of him. Anyway not that it matters but he is a Scorpio/Sag cusp (Nov 21) with a Taurus moon and I’m a Scorpio (Oct 30) with a Leo moon.

I see... with your moons it will take time 🙂 Taurus moon will take forever to get used to a new situation,

your Leo moon will be more dramatic, in wanting attention and no nonsense (in a good way) - so, like in 2 years time it will be the real thing - fixed signs take forever to get into the situation and be comfortable..... 2 months? nah....

just be yourself (but give it some time, you know yourself how hard it is, when your sun and moon are a different element.... )

what are your venuses and marses? ascendant?

Me:

Sun Scorpio 6°49'

Moon Leo 12°41'

Mercury Scorpio 23°16'

Venus Virgo 20°19'

Mars Scorpio 9°31'

Jupiter Virgo 9°15'

Saturn Aquarius 0°44'

Uranus Capricorn 10°33'

Neptune Capricorn 14°20'

Pluto Scorpio 19°47'

Lilith Capricorn 20°50'

Asc node Capricorn 11°55'

Him:

Sun Scorpio 29°00'

Moon Taurus 27°18'

Mercury Sagittarius 21°01'

Venus Libra 13°34'

Mars Scorpio 24°52'

Jupiter Virgo 12°18'

Saturn Aquarius 2°02'

Uranus Capricorn 11°28'

Neptune Capricorn 14°51'

Pluto Scorpio 20°40'

Lilith Capricorn 23°18'

Asc node Capricorn 10°25'

unfortunately, our scorpio brothers are overemotional little thots. all feelings come from below, not the brain or heart. sorry bros. not all of you, but quite a few.

don't jinx our union though lol. i am a scorpio married to a scorpio. we are partners in crime. i actually have an "us against the world" kind of woman and it feels good.

Yeah well I’m just as emotional so he should no better. I think the union is great as long as it’s maturity involved. The way he has been acting is unpleasant.

I agree Warangel. I seem to be the one who is the most direct.