Want vs Need

It is safe to say that if you are coupled, you *want* to be with your mate. But, do you feel that you *need* your partner? Both?

Is it unhealthy to believe that you need a man/woman in your life? Why?

Does it make you codependant?


Expound.

""No, that would make someone dependent. Codependency is something completely different. ""


I'm sorry. I should have wrote dependent.

Although, the issue of codependency can arise if the level of need is mutual.

You know, I'm so used to writing "codependent" like every other day. One of the clients has this issue. He becomes obsessed with anyone who shows him a hint of kindness. Sticks to their ass like glue.


::sigh:: I try so hard to be patient. I'm not made for this.

""Why shouldn't we acknowledge our emotional interdependence as well? I don't think there is anything wrong with it. People need people, just as the animals and plants need each other. We are no different. ""

Oh, I agree, totally.


Was hoping to get some anti-"howdoiconvincethismantoloveme?" dialogue going here. A change in pace. 🙂

lol MIA


Shut up.

Damn, my food tastes good!


I need to audition for Hell's Kitchen or something.

lol@MsP

I am about to make a pineapple-coconut cake. 🙂 They begged me.

I like the way you think, PFE. I'm going to dedicate a shrine to you.

If someday, heaven forbid, you happen to leave God's green earth, I think they should do studies on your brain and showcase it as an exhibit in the musean of natural history.

*museum

🙂 @ the love

""SS, I would like to put you in charge of the slicer, if you will do the honors. ""

- Why, of course!



""Just don't let those tauruses mistake it for lunch meat and turn me into sandwiches. I am counting on you.""

- lol You're crazy.

Are you wearing an apron?🙂

""Unless of course your comments were sarcastic,...""

No, not at all! I was just afraid I'd frighten you with my codependency. 😛

I am obsessed with your brain and will pique it to my heart's desire. 🙂

😛 @ M


You have jokes.


And no, I'm not wearing my apron. I do have one though. 🙂

ugh, enough now.

Inquiring minds wanted to know. Tis all 🙂

M

You're a comedian. An actual stand-up comic.

""I think there are goals that we can achieve ourselves and other goals we need people to achieve. It doesn't make you a weak individual to acknowledge that. I need a woman in my life to enhance the great things I already have in my life, so I can reach a level that I couldn't without her and she should need me for the same reason. I'm not here to create a life for her but to enhance what she already had, to hopefully make it better. No matter how strong and successful I can be as an individual, I'll be a fool to think that I'm better alone than without the right woman by my side.""


Well, hot damn!


What are you, a poet?! Artist of some sort? Cuz us regular ppl just aren't inclined to write like that.

""ugh, enough now.""


I smell jealousy. No need. I will pique yours too, at my discretion. With or without your consent. 🙂

You know, they say left-handed ppl are artistically inclined. Well, not in my case. My stick figures aren't even recognizable.

at least you're honest with yourself about not knowing. a lot of people fool themselves into thinking they know when they really have no idea.

^to sb

""lol @ us regular ppl ... you're funny SS""


At your service. 🙂

""at least you're honest with yourself about not knowing. a lot of people fool themselves into thinking they know when they really have no idea.""


Agreed. It took me up until my 3rd year of college, unfortunately, to realize that I didn't really know what I wanted. I let others make me feel bad about not knowing what I wanted. Finally, I allowed myself to accept that it was OKAY not to know exactly what I wanted to do with my life at 20 yrs old. That's when I threw up my middle fingers to the world, and haven't stopped since. I am currently exploring/contemplating all options. The world is my stomping ground.

Now, I tell young ppl all the time to relax and enjoy being young. Have a plan, but don't kill yourself if things deviate slightly from plan. That's called life.

hear, hear. i've recently come to this realization myself.

"Also, no one can complete you. If you think somoene else can complete you, then that does indeed make you a weak person. No one could possibly know you, or understand you better than you can understand yourself. there are those who can relate to you, there are even those who know where you are comming from. But no one in the world can see the world, and experience it from your eyes. And because they can't, that person can in no way complete you. You may learn more about yourself through other people, but they can never define who you are. That is only up to you.

Relationships should never be about depending on others. and I think that is the reason they fail many times today. Because people always depend on others to make themselves feel complete. It doesn't work out, no matter how great it seems, and how grandiose it sounds. You only truely need yourself, you only desire other people. You will not die if those people are not around, unless you allow them to influence you in those ways"

- sooo true. wow, branh, that is some of the most sensible talk i've ever heard. ever.

Furthermore, college is a fucking scam, goddamnit! It's a money-making scam!


If you aren't trying to be a doctor or lawyer or some other profession that REQUIRES a specialized degree, save yourself the grief. If you really wanna get ahead in life, be an entrepreneur! Anything else is slavery.

There are lots of stupid lawyers.

I am forced to interact with stupid doctors weekly as well.

AND I work alongside a PhD who cannot do simple math in her head.

College is about expansion. I can do that at my local free library. In my opinion, a trade (coulpe with a knack for business) can carry you farther than a degree. Expecially in our dwindling economy.

When doctors are stupid though, it's usually because they don't do research in order to keep up with the developments in their field. They should be required to do periodic research.

coulpe = * coupled


lolol

I wouldnt advise against the institution though.

I would.


The shit is a scam.

Unless, of course, you are lucky enough to get a *full* scholarship. Otherwise, don't go.

Oh, yes!


I enjoyed my college experience and have no regrets! I'm just saying that if I knew then what I know now, I'd have skipped college altogether and spent those four years earning actual money by starting my own business and using my talents.

There arent many that can say they made it without the system; especially these days. When a bachelors degree is so fickle. You need more.

If you can make it on your own, by all means. BUT if your still lost and unaware of what the world has to offer and what you have to offer to it., college is a rest stop.

I thank God everyday for my experiences.

I also agree that Americans dont take their education seriously.

""Trust me, one day you will thank your stars you went to NYU.""

Oh, I do. Like I said, I have no regrets about going. I've built an amazing network there that is going to benefit me in the future.

I just see so many people with advanced degrees, who are out of work, or underemployed. 😢 It pains me to see them struggle...AND on top of that, be in so much debt.


""That's why you fear the Chinese.""

- Oh, God! Whisper! They might hear you.

::looks behind shoulder for approaching Chinese.::

""You went to NYU, SS?? ""

Yup.


My cousin graduated from UPenn and has a shitty job.

I also know a girl who went to Columbia and spent more than a year job-hunting. My cousin, on the other hand, who is also a Columbia alumn, is on Wall Street, stacking major dough.

Well, with a Bachelor's degree, you aren't really expected to follow up with a job that relates directly with your major. Many people end up working a job that has absolutely nothing to do with their degree. That's why I advised against feeling pressured to know EXACTLY what you want to do prior to your junior year of college.

""I also agree that Americans dont take their education seriously.""

That's because in America, you don't need a degree to be important. In other countries, you do.

""...and now works for Teach for America.""


lol! Everybody does that.

It also makes me sad that I work alongside people with advanced degrees, who I'm pretty certain don't make much more than I do. It does damage to their ego. If I were them, I'd kill myself.

I know a girl who is going to Colombia pursuing a masters in elementary education. She actually does want to teach little children. All of this with no scholarship, she will definitely be broke, BUT it was her decision.

Me leo bff will be attending grad school for creative writing, she has settled (for now) in becoming a professor.

The degree is just a paper after that you make what it what you wish. Its all about networking and BSing/ass kissing. Once you get your foot in a door/any door.

For some majors; there just isnt much hope.

MsP

How did you get into college if you didn't finish high school? Are you referring to AP courses?

well, of course having a college degree is not the only thing that will determine how quickly or IF someone finds a job. it depends on job availability and what type of the degree the person has, and if that degree works for the jobs that are available. location, luck, job market...all factors that can majorly ruin any hard-earned degree.

although i do agree with you notso, that college education is a very money-oriented business. it is ridiculous how much these so-called prestigious universities charge students, based on little more than their reputation. so, i am fighting it in my own way. i won't pay $ 40,000 a semester for my education, whether it be through scholarships, grants, loans, or out-of-pocket.

"I earn more than most of my friends who went to college, but I wish I were as educated as they."

then educate yourself. sometimes it's just as good.

(if not better. lol.)

""...which is funny because American degrees can certainly make you important everywhere else.""

I know, right? lol


I knew this guy who decided to go away to college in China. Everyone was like, "Why the HELL would you do something like that. You must not be planning to EVER return to the States." He was advised by many to kill himself.