Frustrating...I need to scream..

I just don't understand my virgo man tonight..He texts and says he is off work this week and wants to see me, I say what day and he says any.. I say Mon or Tues are okay..Then I hear nothing back from him..for an hour..so I text and ask where he wants to meet...nothing back..I can see he is on IM so I ask him there..nothing..then he logs off..but is still online at a social networking site..
I call and get no answer...I mean I am through at this point and still don't know how to plan the week...

What is the deal? I want to hang on to this guy but i don't know if I can stand not having a normal conversation..The only thing that helps me halfway understand him is I have studied his sign..can any of you virgos tell me what is going on in his head?

Thanks

Weird... I don't think there is a logical explanation for it.

You sure you didn't tick him off somehow?
Some quirky remark?

No.. I just ask what day would be good and then told him Mon or Tues..
We generally meet halfway somewhere cause he lives 2 hours from me and we may get a place to stay or something so I also texted and ask if he wanted me to get a place or not..but still nothing..I saw he was online an hour later so I know he got it..I am not the chasing type and give him plenty of room to breath. I usually don't text or call unless he initiates because I understand how he is..but I feel this is a little disrespectful to ask and then not follow through..

Posted by LakeLady
No.. I just ask what day would be good and then told him Mon or Tues..
We generally meet halfway somewhere cause he lives 2 hours from me and we may get a place to stay or something so I also texted and ask if he wanted me to get a place or not..but still nothing..I saw he was online an hour later so I know he got it..I am not the chasing type and give him plenty of room to breath. I usually don't text or call unless he initiates because I understand how he is..but I feel this is a little disrespectful to ask and then not follow through..

sometimes with virgos u have to analyze our words cuz we are analyzing urs 24/7 u should ask and say hey in a calm way and say i wonder what happened abc and d u say i was looking forward to going out and just ask is everything okay. i dont kno if that will work i usually do dat with people i kno and always get a answer outta dem cuz im always considerate of others feelings.

good luck

Well it just seemed like everything changed in a matter of minutes..one minute he was texting and saying he wanted to spend time then...nothing and ignoring me to boot..

Yes I have considered this..I know he is this way..but it is frustrating to no end. I want to give him space but also feel like if he has any respect for me that he could give me a heads up on plans. If I didn't have strong feelings for him, I wouldn't put up with any of this..lol..Something in me wants to understand him and be able to communicate in ways that we both can understand..guess that is why I am on this board..lol Thanx

No offense but your too easy and available (easy as in I can have you anytime I want) that makes a man take a woman for granted, he's online HUNTING for a less available woman. Someone on your other thread told you to not do things on his schedule which means sometimes you have to send him the message that he doesn't have a choice with you, meet me on this day, this time or we will catch up later at another time. You have been conquered and there is nothing left to do but make you wait. And wait you shall especially if there are no other men around and a man can sense when he has you completely, has your full attention, has your whole body and mind and he will frustrate the hell out of you, not on purpose but moreso because you are allowing him to feel he has you 100% , he has no challenges, no obstacles, no way of exhausting his male energy to get a reward to be with you, to have you, your boring and predictable, your just there, all open, available and ready.

I don't say that to offend you but I see some predictable patterns that will kill a man's attraction, when men pull away they don't exactly know why, they just feel less attracted and shift there focus elsewhere (social networking site).

It's time to shift your focus back onto you, it's not about him, to make it about him is to allow him to DEFINE the relationship, to do as he wants when he chooses, that is not how you get the love you want, it's not about what is he doing, why is he doing it, he he he. Try having a new attitude, a more productive positive one, he's busy elsewhere so I am going to the new restuarant on Monday instead of going out with him, I will go out and have a good time on Tuesday with the girls, I will go and cocoon on Wednesday turn off my phone, get offline and watch a good movie, me me me, I I I and thus my schedule is full and when he confirms I will have to decline b/c he did not get back to me in a respectable time which is okay, no problem but I refuse to allow my life to stop turning because he doesn't confirm and this sends him a distinct message that if he doesn't get with the program he miss out ....when you make it about you he will too...

Your guy is focused elsewhere, busy with his life, busy with other women that don't require emotional connection, busy doing other things that he enjoy doing that requires less emotional connection/intimacy, he's busy being a loner, if he's a loner emotional connection is going to TURN HIM OFF (too much of it will destroy the relationship) so he's most likely running away from your need to connect with him right now.

Virgo men can be cold, hopefully he will pull out of his selfish loner ways but I would not suggest you try to convince him to be more available, that will just cause more problems.

thanx for advise..It all makes sense, but hard to follow through..I will make myself unavailable and see how it goes..I have other people that would really like to go out with me and I put them off to wait for him. It's not like he is the only one I can have.

Honestly it's not about making yourself unavailable to get him to come around, it's about UNDERSTANDING men and being less available because you love your life and your life waits on NO MAN. It's more of an attitude of self love than it is about attempting to be something to get something. Don't neglect your life to have a bit of time with ONE man, enjoy your friends, your job, your life, your time, your other men. Sometimes women tend to like a man, love him even and then WAIT on him, bad idea, it creates neglect and opens the door to be mistreated and pushed to the side. If he don't want to talk, connect FINE, my life is so great I don't need him to be there especially when he doesn't want to be, if there other men around you, dating, playing, smiling, having fun, flirting, being open virgo shouldn't look all that attractive to you anyways.

Lets not making this a war between male and female..!


Understand the fact that sometimes people —don't feel like it?? and when it happen especially to Virgos it??ll takes us —x?? amount of time to get back inline again —sometimes we may never get back to the previous position as well, no one knows for sure even for Virgos analysing other Virgos?? male or female alike.

This behaviour is more obvious with the middle aged Virgos (as they are more independent and crave for personal freedom) than the younger Virgos, there are many things in this picture that one cannot summarize and accept it as the facts, people are different each individuals living in their own complex world!

Perhaps he is looking for kind of security for well-established relationship with you, his project maybe time consuming, and frustrating or perhaps the thought of it makes him frustrated to a degree that he wants to cut off the usual chitchat for sometimes.

Remember that fears and frustrations are always comes from imaginations and lack of correct information. If you stop exposing your feeling to the whole world and sharing it with the unknown people seeking for advice, you??ll find enough power inside your heart to deal with such.

Be brave, you are neither a first one nor the last one to hit the Virgo forum with this particular problem.

Posted by DyTryin

LakeLady,

I'm a middle-aged Virgo Man married to a Scorpio Woman - celebrated our Third Anniversary back in OCT...

IMHO, you are a "booty call" for this VirGuy...

Y'all hook up about once a week for sex, right?

And, he disses you, but stays logged on to a "social networking" site -- which to me means he's working other women.

You need to stand firm, be an Eagle, and confront him about what you two are... If you're a couple, then he needs to treat you with respect. If you are FWBs, then you need to know...

FWIW: Virgos don't handle "long distance relationships" very well.

You may need to forget about him, and look for a guy closer to home.

Listen to DY, he gives some of the best advice on the virgo board sbout male virgo's, I'm glad you chimed in DY.

"Shit! If I'd treated my Scorpio the way LakeLady has been treated, I'd still be single!"

LOL!

"A Virgo will try your patience, and test your limits, and if you have none -- if you roll over to him -- he will assume you're cool with being treated like shit."

Exactly DY, I couldn't have said it better

ooohhh great advice..I understand..Me and this guy have actually known each other a long time on a lot of different levels. When we got to the sexual level is when it got complicated. I guess more feelings involved. You guys have given me good insight on what he may or may not be feeling about me. I have not taken the "booty call" comments in offense. I mean I like it as much as he does so it isn't like it is one sided in that arena. I enjoy being with him on that level and would like to step it up to another level if at all possible. I will take this advice and use it..thanx

actually I am planning on moving closer to him because of work. We are 2 hrs apart now and that will bring me another hour closer. I don't like the long distance thing, so you are correct. We do have other interests besides sex. He is outdoorsy and I am too. We are planning kayaking trips and the like. I just have to take a lot of his actions with a grain of salt. He may act one way on a certain day and it is completely different the next day. I know when he works a lot and gets tired he withdraws a lot more than when he is off..

thanks again..

Well..our date night went well. extremely well.
I talked our situation over with him and he didn't think there was a problem. He said he was sorry for the miscommunication and that he was just tired from working 12 hour shifts. We agreed that we would communicate better from now on. He is planning a trip to see me and said we will work on going out more.

He knows I respect his privacy and down time. I will not push..If there is anything there between us..I am willing to be patient and wait for him.

excuse seems pretty lame, he ignored your text messages, he's online and still not responding so being tired from work seems to be hardly the problem, it takes but a minute to answer a text and maybe 2 minutes to say I'm tired let's catch up later. I wonder if he gave this excuse before or after sex, I agree with DY, observe changes if none are forthcoming then waiting would not be in your best interest.

I'd blow him off - to hell with waiting around for someone who's treating you like that. My advice is to ignore him and go occupy yourself with something else for a while. If he's in a mood about something, that will give him time to get over it...If not, then you might wanna consider moving on. Worst thing you can do is crowd a virgo, IMO you've definitely showed your interest but I wouldn't recommend contacting him any further - it's time to back off and see if he comes to you.

Good luck 🙂

Sorry just realised my opening line could be misinterpreted lol...I don't mean the dirty kind of blow 😉