In love with my best friend (virgo girl) but she is confused. Advices on what I should do?

I am a virgo guy in love a virgo girl whom i've known for 11 years.I was afraid of losing her so it was hard but I admitted my feelings to her a few months ago while we were out celebrating each other's birthdays (age difference of 8 days).I waited for like 2 years to tell her how I feel. She said that she needed some time to think about it and asked me not to pressurize her about it. She also mentioned that if we were in a relationship together sometime the future she would love it because she really likes me, respects me and trusts me the most. I gave her time to think about it but then around the end of December there was a death in her family. I tried being by her side but she wanted to be alone and the next day she suddenly said that it would be best if the two of us stayed friends. I told her that I felt for her and clearly its hard to stay just friends like this but I would respect her decision.Since then she started distancing herself, not picking up my calls, slow replies on facebook,made excuses every time I asked her to meet.Then suddenly a few days ago we started chatting on facebook again and she said that she missed meeting me as we used to and she started chatting in a way a girlfriend usually does but she calls it as 'just flirting'. I thought maybe she doesn't have much experience with relationships because she was never in one before.Suddenly today she said again that she wants some more time to think.Don't know what to do.Any advices?

She's being selfish and only concerned with what she wants or doesn't want. If she were a true friend, she'd consider your feelings as well, and put you out of your misery either way.

She needs to have a bucket full of ice water dumped on her, a big wake-up call. You don't treat like that someone you claim to "really likes me, respects me and trusts me the most".

This is hard to swallow but I would say go with the flow. Don't try to push her into thinking a relationship would be best. Her flirting might be just testing herself out. You can try to seduce her to try to convince her but don't pressure her. Be open and honest.

Ugh, I hate this state of Virgo.

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
She's being selfish and only concerned with what she wants or doesn't want. If she were a true friend, she'd consider your feelings as well, and put you out of your misery either way.

She needs to have a bucket full of ice water dumped on her, a big wake-up call. You don't treat like that someone you claim to "really likes me, respects me and trusts me the most".

You glossed over death in her family.

Posted by yupvirgoo
Then let her think.

She's had plenty of time to think. She's probably already made up her mind but she possibly doesn't want to lose the friendship by saying "no I don't want you that way", but she's causing damage to it anyway.

Sometimes a Virgo just needs to get off his/her ass and get things over with.

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
She's being selfish and only concerned with what she wants or doesn't want. If she were a true friend, she'd consider your feelings as well, and put you out of your misery either way.

She needs to have a bucket full of ice water dumped on her, a big wake-up call. You don't treat like that someone you claim to "really likes me, respects me and trusts me the most".

She needs to hear this but from someone else

Posted by yupvirgoo
Then let her think.

Yes, this.

Then state your case again and be blunt as fuck. Tell her straight up this gray zone thing isn't working for you at all and it might be better to end the friendship than harbor hope she might get on the same page with you.

If the second time doesn't work, drop her. Sometimes Virgo women need to be short circuited to see the potential in a friendship turning into romance (we usually stick people in one category and it's like siberian death camp, you aren't getting out ever). If you tell her again you are attracted to her and she's "tee hee" again and flirtatious while still saying you're friends, you don't want that. I now that type so at that point..go away and find someone willing to reciprocate because she isn't worth it.

Posted by Damnata

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
She's being selfish and only concerned with what she wants or doesn't want. If she were a true friend, she'd consider your feelings as well, and put you out of your misery either way.

She needs to have a bucket full of ice water dumped on her, a big wake-up call. You don't treat like that someone you claim to "really likes me, respects me and trusts me the most".

You glossed over death in her family.

click to expand

No I didn't. There's those 2-3 months between their birthdays and the death.

Posted by Lilianni

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
She's being selfish and only concerned with what she wants or doesn't want. If she were a true friend, she'd consider your feelings as well, and put you out of your misery either way.

She needs to have a bucket full of ice water dumped on her, a big wake-up call. You don't treat like that someone you claim to "really likes me, respects me and trusts me the most".

She needs to hear this but from someone else

click to expand

Nah. The direct approach sometimes is the best one. Works every time.

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy

Posted by Damnata

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
She's being selfish and only concerned with what she wants or doesn't want. If she were a true friend, she'd consider your feelings as well, and put you out of your misery either way.

She needs to have a bucket full of ice water dumped on her, a big wake-up call. You don't treat like that someone you claim to "really likes me, respects me and trusts me the most".

You glossed over death in her family.

No I didn't. There's those 2-3 months between their birthdays and the death.

click to expand

It's a process. Not everyone has Aries placements you know? Have to give these people a fighting chance to work through...whatever. Some move slow.

Posted by Damnata

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy

Posted by Damnata

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
She's being selfish and only concerned with what she wants or doesn't want. If she were a true friend, she'd consider your feelings as well, and put you out of your misery either way.

She needs to have a bucket full of ice water dumped on her, a big wake-up call. You don't treat like that someone you claim to "really likes me, respects me and trusts me the most".

You glossed over death in her family.

No I didn't. There's those 2-3 months between their birthdays and the death.

It's a process. Not everyone has Aries placements you know? Have to give these people a fighting chance to work through...whatever. Some move slow.

click to expand

3 months is Libra territory. That's BAD.

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy

Posted by Damnata

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy

Posted by Damnata

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
She's being selfish and only concerned with what she wants or doesn't want. If she were a true friend, she'd consider your feelings as well, and put you out of your misery either way.

She needs to have a bucket full of ice water dumped on her, a big wake-up call. You don't treat like that someone you claim to "really likes me, respects me and trusts me the most".

You glossed over death in her family.

No I didn't. There's those 2-3 months between their birthdays and the death.

It's a process. Not everyone has Aries placements you know? Have to give these people a fighting chance to work through...whatever. Some move slow.

3 months is Libra territory. That's BAD.

click to expand

Lmao, I agree that anything Libra is bad.

Still OP is a Virgo. He might not have expressed it..ardently.

There is a world of a difference between "Hey, I am attracted to you do you want to go on a date with me?" and "Uhm..so...uhm...I like you?!"

Just saying. But if he tries again and she does that flirty bs too then drop her like a hot potato.

Posted by Damnata

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy

Posted by Damnata

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy

Posted by Damnata

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
She's being selfish and only concerned with what she wants or doesn't want. If she were a true friend, she'd consider your feelings as well, and put you out of your misery either way.

She needs to have a bucket full of ice water dumped on her, a big wake-up call. You don't treat like that someone you claim to "really likes me, respects me and trusts me the most".

You glossed over death in her family.

No I didn't. There's those 2-3 months between their birthdays and the death.

It's a process. Not everyone has Aries placements you know? Have to give these people a fighting chance to work through...whatever. Some move slow.

3 months is Libra territory. That's BAD.

Lmao, I agree that anything Libra is bad.

Still OP is a Virgo. He might not have expressed it..ardently.

There is a world of a difference between "Hey, I am attracted to you do you want to go on a date with me?" and "Uhm..so...uhm...I like you?!"

Just saying. But if he tries again and she does that flirty bs too then drop her like a hot potato.

click to expand

Well Virgos are better at show than tell so he might as well just club her over the head and drag her back to his cave by the hair. Can't misunderstand THAT.

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy

Posted by Damnata

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy

Posted by Damnata

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy

Posted by Damnata

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
She's being selfish and only concerned with what she wants or doesn't want. If she were a true friend, she'd consider your feelings as well, and put you out of your misery either way.

She needs to have a bucket full of ice water dumped on her, a big wake-up call. You don't treat like that someone you claim to "really likes me, respects me and trusts me the most".

You glossed over death in her family.

No I didn't. There's those 2-3 months between their birthdays and the death.

It's a process. Not everyone has Aries placements you know? Have to give these people a fighting chance to work through...whatever. Some move slow.

3 months is Libra territory. That's BAD.

Lmao, I agree that anything Libra is bad.

Still OP is a Virgo. He might not have expressed it..ardently.

There is a world of a difference between "Hey, I am attracted to you do you want to go on a date with me?" and "Uhm..so...uhm...I like you?!"

Just saying. But if he tries again and she does that flirty bs too then drop her like a hot potato.

Well Virgos are better at show than tell so he might as well just club her over the head and drag her back to his cave by the hair. Can't misunderstand THAT.

click to expand

I am all in favor of that and that's what I told him to do in his first topic. But people just don't listen.

You really cannot go wrong with that lmao.

Going off-topic for a minute

@aritrazzz

being a Virgo yourself, can you answer a quick question for me? I'm trying to get as many different Virgo views as possible: how would you generally behave around a gay guy friend who you're extremely comfortable around (the friend has already admitted he's attracted to you)?

*sigh*

i need a drink after reading this thread

Posted by Damnata

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy

Posted by Damnata

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy

Posted by Damnata

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
She's being selfish and only concerned with what she wants or doesn't want. If she were a true friend, she'd consider your feelings as well, and put you out of your misery either way.

She needs to have a bucket full of ice water dumped on her, a big wake-up call. You don't treat like that someone you claim to "really likes me, respects me and trusts me the most".

You glossed over death in her family.

No I didn't. There's those 2-3 months between their birthdays and the death.

It's a process. Not everyone has Aries placements you know? Have to give these people a fighting chance to work through...whatever. Some move slow.

3 months is Libra territory. That's BAD.

Lmao, I agree that anything Libra is bad.

Still OP is a Virgo. He might not have expressed it..ardently.

There is a world of a difference between "Hey, I am attracted to you do you want to go on a date with me?" and "Uhm..so...uhm...I like you?!"

Just saying. But if he tries again and she does that flirty bs too then drop her like a hot potato.

click to expand

I am a virgo guy with libra cusp (22nd sept).I told her how I feel very clearly face to face and honestly I think I was able to express everything better than I had hoped.Even on our way back home she said it was foolish to keep this to myself for so long and that I should have told her about it before.Its weird the way she talks to me sometimes nowadays exactly like a girlfriend does,she seems jealous when I hang out with my friends after work and more but she calls it as 'just flirting'.

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
Going off-topic for a minute

@aritrazzz

being a Virgo yourself, can you answer a quick question for me? I'm trying to get as many different Virgo views as possible: how would you generally behave around a gay guy friend who you're extremely comfortable around (the friend has already admitted he's attracted to you)?

I am not into gay men and I got no gay friends so honestly I got no idea.But I guess I would just tell him that I am not interested in it and would behave normally,I dont really get angry or irritated easily and believe everybody has the right to feel anyway they want.Unless he tries to ask for it time and time again I wont be irritated or angry and everything is gonna be fine.

Posted by Damnata

Posted by yupvirgoo
Then let her think.

Yes, this.

Then state your case again and be blunt as fuck. Tell her straight up this gray zone thing isn't working for you at all and it might be better to end the friendship than harbor hope she might get on the same page with you.

If the second time doesn't work, drop her. Sometimes Virgo women need to be short circuited to see the potential in a friendship turning into romance (we usually stick people in one category and it's like siberian death camp, you aren't getting out ever). If you tell her again you are attracted to her and she's "tee hee" again and flirtatious while still saying you're friends, you don't want that. I now that type so at that point..go away and find someone willing to reciprocate because she isn't worth it.

click to expand

I actually thought of the same.I guess i'll try a bit but if it doesn't work then I will meet her and tell her that I cant stay just friends this way.Maybe losing me will wake her up or something.