Virgo is at his "space time" at the moment, it will be his bday this Thur, should I contact him?

He was very distance about a month ago but things get slight better becos I gave him space... But not sure if I should do something about his bday. We had a plan for dinner before he became cold and distance but I have no courage to ask him in case he turn me down... Help please!

Posted by Eskilsdottir
Haha maybe we've been dating the same Virgo...? Just had a very similar experience and still can't get my head around it.

I would probably just text and ask if he still wants to do dinner for his bday, not in an accusing tone, just casually. A lot of people (including myself) get a bit weird about their birthdays.

If he turns you down, he turns you down and at least you'll know. You can't tiptoe around someone whims, especially if you had plans made. He obviously knows there was a plan in place so he shouldn't find it weird that you ask?

Our last conversation (txt message) he asked me to stop stalking him (becos I found out he went back to work at his day off)... I can't interpret he is serious or he is just joking, but I didn't reply him after that... So feel abit awkward if I ask him for dinner even he said "stop stalking"...

In my experience with Virgos, if you haven't annoyed him enough already to the point of being borderline rude to you, he'd disguise seriousness with a little bit of humor.

Did he include "lol" after "stop stalking me"?

If he didn't, he's probably a bit annoyed with you. If you don't want to intrude into his space time, send him a brief text wishing him happy birthday and love. Keep it short & sweet and don't make any suggestive comment about him getting back to you or anything. He might interpret it as manipulation attempt.

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
In my experience with Virgos, if you haven't annoyed him enough already to the point of being borderline rude to you, he'd disguise seriousness with a little bit of humor.

Did he include "lol" after "stop stalking me"?

Not with "lol" ... But I realised whenever I said anything emotional related he will either ignored me or said "ain't we said we give each other space?"

If I said (txt) something like a friend/co-worker, he would reply me normally and doesn't sounds like a jerk...

Again, mixed message which I made me confused... I just hope that he is not expecting me to text first but ended up I didn't make any move...

Posted by tiziani
No offence but it really sounds like this guy has beaten you down mentally to the most submissive position possible. He has you on task.

I think so too, that's why I try to stay at friend zone... I just don't get why Virgo man doesn't make it clear but just keep saying "I need more space"... Just hang you in the air and not giving you a definite answer? Is this tactic or natural Virgo trait?

Posted by Queenofsag

Posted by tiziani
No offence but it really sounds like this guy has beaten you down mentally to the most submissive position possible. He has you on task.

I think so too, that's why I try to stay at friend zone... I just don't get why Virgo man doesn't make it clear but just keep saying "I need more space"... Just hang you in the air and not giving you a definite answer? Is this tactic or natural Virgo trait?

click to expand

Sounds all too familiar lol. I'm a Pisces with Virgo moon and I'm more like a Virgo than a Fish. When I go quiet on someone and don't respond to their messages, it's because I simply don't want to. But I don't want to be rude about it, like snap at you "stop texting me so much" or "leave me alone".

Something must've happened to have made him react that way towards you. Have you been clingy? Usually what makes me behave that way is when the other person keeps pestering me with nonsense. And I do NOT like idle talk. So it's reached a stage where whenever that person shows up or contacts me, my initial reaction is a groan instead of a smile.

You either have done something to irritate him longterm or he just never took to you from the start. But if I were to be more final, I'd assume he doesn't have many romantic feelings towards you, if any.

Why would you want to do something for someone's birthday when they arent talking to you. You havent talked to him in a month but you wanna celebrate his birthday?

If you must, just text him to see if he wants to hang out.

Posted by DMV
Why would you want to do something for someone's birthday when they arent talking to you. You havent talked to him in a month but you wanna celebrate his birthday?

If you must, just text him to see if he wants to hang out.

We talked (txt) every 2-3 days and whenever we see each other at work (99% I initiated)... Just like friend... But I guess you are right... If he never initiate any convo which shows how he feels towards to me...

Wait... Are you guys even together? Or does he just see you as a friend/coworker?

Was there ever a definite "yeah we're dating"?

Because it seems like there hasn't.

You said that you always "initiate at work just like a friend", so this is a friendship.¿

Why bother? When we like someone we don't need that much space from them.

Posted by starwars

Posted by Queenofsag
I can't interpret he is serious or he is just joking

#Virgosproblems

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I feel great that I didn't contact him at all on his bday. He treated me like rubbish but whenever he appeared within 3m of my proximity (same company but different department), I can feel he is looking at me and checking me out (not necessarily want to get my attention but just check me out).

I didn't get reply the other message (in this forum) that the poster asked if we are dating, I think we are more than that, already slept together few times but he pull out all the sudden.

I thought Virgo really cares his image so he know that I would think he is a jerk. But he made no effort to just make things end nicer except said give him space and slow down abit.

Arghhhhh... Glad that I can pull myself back in one piece and live my own life.

Posted by starwars
@OP don't contact him ever again!

Will see him more often after I change department. Any tips for staying calm?

Posted by cheekyfaerie
This guy is so not interested.

Highly likely. Should leave this man alone from now on.

Posted by OmniVirgoFlirt

Posted by Queenofsag
He was very distance about a month ago but things get slight better becos I gave him space... But not sure if I should do something about his bday. We had a plan for dinner before he became cold and distance but I have no courage to ask him in case he turn me down... Help please!

What do you want to do? Answer that.

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Just be simple and not over complicating the situation. Dinner with nice wine and have a friendly chat. No mind game and no one should get hurt. Naive?

Posted by Queenofsag
He was very distance about a month ago but things get slight better becos I gave him space... But not sure if I should do something about his bday. We had a plan for dinner before he became cold and distance but I have no courage to ask him in case he turn me down... Help please!

Just curious, any Saturn or Pluto hard aspects to Venus?

Posted by GypsyInChains

Posted by Queenofsag
He was very distance about a month ago but things get slight better becos I gave him space... But not sure if I should do something about his bday. We had a plan for dinner before he became cold and distance but I have no courage to ask him in case he turn me down... Help please!

Just curious, any Saturn or Pluto hard aspects to Venus?

click to expand

How to find out? Just know the birthday that's all

Posted by Queenofsag

Posted by tiziani
No offence but it really sounds like this guy has beaten you down mentally to the most submissive position possible. He has you on task.

I think so too, that's why I try to stay at friend zone... I just don't get why Virgo man doesn't make it clear but just keep saying "I need more space"... Just hang you in the air and not giving you a definite answer? Is this tactic or natural Virgo trait?

click to expand

I'm not a Virgo, or a man lol, but I can't help but think when reading this that when I want space, and make it clear to Someone, that most likely means I feel annoyed or smothered by them. I need that space to think thingsover, reasses the relationship, just some me time without that person.

With enough time, and I think most importantly *how that person reacts to giving me the space I need/respects that* I can usually figure out if I want them in my life at all.

With all this said, I think you should respect his wishes. Most likely those plans he may not follow through with for his bday because he may not be at that place with you yet. Id say forget the plans and send him a nice birthday message.dont expect anything in return, and don't overthink it. Keep living your life. I can get back into doing things while I have space from a person and realize I don't even miss them and I now know it's not fair to the other person who is left hanging. In this case you.

Posted by aNEWday

Posted by Queenofsag

Posted by tiziani
No offence but it really sounds like this guy has beaten you down mentally to the most submissive position possible. He has you on task.

I think so too, that's why I try to stay at friend zone... I just don't get why Virgo man doesn't make it clear but just keep saying "I need more space"... Just hang you in the air and not giving you a definite answer? Is this tactic or natural Virgo trait?

I'm not a Virgo, or a man lol, but I can't help but think when reading this that when I want space, and make it clear to Someone, that most likely means I feel annoyed or smothered by them. I need that space to think thingsover, reasses the relationship, just some me time without that person.

With enough time, and I think most importantly *how that person reacts to giving me the space I need/respects that* I can usually figure out if I want them in my life at all.

With all this said, I think you should respect his wishes. Most likely those plans he may not follow through with for his bday because he may not be at that place with you yet. Id say forget the plans and send him a nice birthday message.dont expect anything in return, and don't overthink it. Keep living your life. I can get back into doing things while I have space from a person and realize I don't even miss them and I now know it's not fair to the other person who is left hanging. In this case you.

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I totally agreed, I love my space too.

Just turn out too weird that only happened right after we slept together twice. If it was a one or two night stand, just say it and don't hang ppl in the air. Or just be bold said I only used you for tree trunking.

Space will be granted if no sexual relationship involved. You think b4 you asking for stepping out of the friend zone and try to get intimate?

If I asked for space from someone, I wouldn't mind them telling me happy birthday and keeping it at that. So I think its cool to atleast tell him if you'd want but keep it short and sweet, let him start the convo up and if not he might still be in his "I need my space zone"

Posted by Earthboundfeline
If I asked for space from someone, I wouldn't mind them telling me happy birthday and keeping it at that. So I think its cool to atleast tell him if you'd want but keep it short and sweet, let him start the convo up and if not he might still be in his "I need my space zone"

It was his bday yesterday so is too late anyway.

Life is too short for difficult Virgo no matter how cute he is. Awwww

So, you sleep with a man without having a relationship with him, which means you were just fuck buddies.

After he got down your pantes, he pulled away and told you to give him space .. which you didn't do .. because now you think that he owes you a relationship.

so, he tells you to stop stalking him .. which means you must be up in his space wanting him to value you as being a lady, when really, you were just a piece of ass. If you have to be told to stop stalking, then that is a sure indication that you are over stepping boundaries.

then once asked by someone in here what you want, you say that you want to have a nice dinner with wine with him ... which translate to: you want romance from him.

You are seriously deluded. You fucked a man without terms. And he took you for the piece of ass that you presented yourself to be.

I understand that you want to be courted, and want romance ... but, you're not going to get that from a fwb.



Do yourself a favor and delete this thread, delete him, delete this ridiculous fantasy that is false ..... then grow some knowledge and wisdom about how people work, their nature, realize that a fwb isn't a respectful relationship and never will be.

Then after you've learned all that ... then find a guy ... and keep your goddam legs closed, for christ sake

Posted by aNEWday

Posted by Queenofsag

Posted by tiziani
No offence but it really sounds like this guy has beaten you down mentally to the most submissive position possible. He has you on task.

I think so too, that's why I try to stay at friend zone... I just don't get why Virgo man doesn't make it clear but just keep saying "I need more space"... Just hang you in the air and not giving you a definite answer? Is this tactic or natural Virgo trait?

I'm not a Virgo, or a man lol, but I can't help but think when reading this that when I want space, and make it clear to Someone, that most likely means I feel annoyed or smothered by them. I need that space to think thingsover, reasses the relationship, just some me time without that person.

With enough time, and I think most importantly *how that person reacts to giving me the space I need/respects that* I can usually figure out if I want them in my life at all.

With all this said, I think you should respect his wishes. Most likely those plans he may not follow through with for his bday because he may not be at that place with you yet. Id say forget the plans and send him a nice birthday message.dont expect anything in return, and don't overthink it. Keep living your life. I can get back into doing things while I have space from a person and realize I don't even miss them and I now know it's not fair to the other person who is left hanging. In this case you.

click to expand

He text me last night and asked me if I'm happier now. We have short and friendly respond back and fore. Today is the day we supposed to go for his bday dinner. He didnt say anything but just mentioned he is happy. Should I ask him if he want to grab dinner sometime next week or don't say anything unless he ask? I don't want to scare him away again.