Cold... Distant... Not very affectionate

Hello fellow Aquarians!!!! So, as I was taking a little stroll outside today, I got lost in thought.

What brought this about? Well, I dropped a friend off at the airport yesterday, and I gave them a hug. They hugged me awkwardly, and said "thanks, you never hug, that was kinds weird". It was a sincere comment, but that is so true.

I hardly ever touch people or hug them. Do I want to, hell yes. There are times when I just want to give someone a tight bear hug, but something holds me back. I took a step outside myself on my walk today, and I feel that I am shut off, guarded and distant when it comes to displays of affection... at arms length of those closest to me. I'm not referring with people I've dated, but with family and close friends. What is my problem? How do I fix this?

Hi! Here is my chart:

Zodiac in degrees 0.00 Placidus Orb:0
Sun Aquarius 29.47 Ascendant Gemini 2.19
Moon Cancer 11.54 II Gemini 27.08
Mercury Aquarius 23.09 III Cancer 19.35
Venus Pisces 6.25 IV Leo 13.46
Mars Cancer 23.08 R V Virgo 13.34
Jupiter Gemini 26.04 R VI Libra 21.26
Saturn Leo 26.55 R VII Sagittarius 2.19
Uranus Scorpio 16.24 VIII Sagittarius 27.08
Neptune Sagittarius 18.05 IX Capricorn 19.35
Pluto Libra 16.27 R Midheaven Aquarius 13.46
Lilith Cancer 3.36 XI Pisces 13.34
Asc node Libra 6.29 XII Aries 21.26

Thank you for your insight Cancer! I will read the article in the morning when I am alert :-)

I have a hard time showing my mum affection and its pretty sad, choosing love over fear has become my mantra lately but its hard for me to open myself up to my mother....I'm very open and friendly to anyone else really considering how cynical i amI don't expect much from people these days and its made all the difference

I really don't know how to "fix" you its just something we learn along the way

Its odd coz I'm not that much of a hugger either but i love to... cuddling someone.. I don't hug my mum as much as I should. Its as if I become reluctant to getting close.. dont know why I do that.. i guess in my mind i want the other to make the move and hug me first?? dunno lol

But coming back to the Aqua.. When I would see my Aqua guy, he wouldn't really greet me with a Hug. When we did it was like those quick friendly ones..

this time was a lil different. Just few days ago I met at his place. When I was leaving i joked saying 'Oi where's my hug you idiot?' He had that cute smile and came towards me and gave me a hug..it was soo comforting and tight.. just wrapped my arms around him and loved it.. I kissed him on the neck and said bye.. but even his hug had an effect on me... aaaahhhh loved that moment lol.. *Shy face*

Well, Rachel, if someone you like reaches out and hugs you or grabs your hand, are you receptive and appreciative or do you tense up?

My aqua boyfriend is very receptive to it, but it's as if he doesn't think about it reaching out as often. He does occasionally, but I find myself reaching out more. But like I said, he is receptive and seems to enjoy holding hands and will massage my hand with his thumb when I grab his hand and will hug me tight whenever I iniate a hug.

I tense up, I touch or hug them back, but I feel like I'm totally stiff, creating an awkward moment for us both! I suppose I'm not use to receiving hugs either or much affection for that matter, so I suppose when I do, it's as if the tables are turned, and it piggy backs my being uncomfortable with it?

i used to be this way! i totally relate.

My friend who is also my old boss love hugs, even with guys, as his way of greeting. I always give him those shoulder hugs vs a full frontal hug. He laughed and said that isn't how you hug, its this way. So every morning instead of my usual happy go lucky wave an "Hello!" i have to give him a hug. Full frontal hug. No side. no pats. just a full hug. I was very awkward and he always made fun of me. Over time it just became a habit. Now i love hugging! i hug everyone! well not EVERYONE, my friends, my boyfriend..though when we are having arguments i like my 6ft of space. hahha

so i guess, dont think too much about it...think of it like a new routine...like excercising...make it into habit that it just becomes a part of who you are.

I would hug my Aqua friend all the time when we met up.

An old Aqua friend of mine had specific requests about how she wanted her hugs.
You could not add a pat to the hug. No back patting when hugging.
This would spark a huge arguments that got us kicked out of her apartment.
Then again she had an Aries man in her bed at the time we were visiting.
Perhaps she was showing off for him.

Anyway......
She struggled to maintain a friendship with a Taurus friend of ours.
She was very condescending toward her and it nearly turned into a physical fight. She would say things like, "okay you want your touchy feely time now? Let's sit down on the floor in a circle and just hug for 5 minutes."

She would complain about this Bull touching her body often.

Given the Bull is bi-sexual/gay and the Aqua was annoyed with that.

Oh man, I can relate to this! A guy I worked with used to cup my back alot and all I kept thinking is: "Why is he touching me like that, we're not dating or friends" It made me very uncomfortable.

If I am comfortable with you, then yes, I will hug you. Most people usually hug me first though.