Confused Scorpio

So a gay Scorpio and I've been dating this cancer guy for a month, we met off a dating app and even before me met, we both had an instant connection.

It was also more intense on our first date, like instant connection everything is grand, we cuddle and kiss it was nice!! we text all the time and he tells me I'm the only one, we are going to get married etc etc.

Then it's been like a month and a week now and on past Wednesday we went on a date and then it seem to got weird. After our date my intuitive knew something was up especially because he didn't tell me goodnight and then in the morning no good morning. Finally I asked him what wassup and he told me "hey we're moving too fast, it's scary give me time to think" of course my life seem to stand still. So I gave him his space.

Then that night he text me and said I still like you and you make me very happy but we need to take it slow and I agree. But then Friday he didn't text me so I did and gave me one word response: I was told he still needs space then that night I seen he added some guy on Instagram and so my Scorpio self I confronted him and like "so guess we are over" "who is that guy" and he's like "no OMG were not over I'll broke him and he blocked him. I didn't even ask.

Then he said I don't want space anymore text me etc. etc.
But he was still be distant but on 4th if July he called me drunk adm was like I like you A lot, you're amazing. I asked him why he did that and he was lm scared to lose you. So I thought that was fine but even then he still was being distant so I started to be too and then he notice and I'm like well you're making me put my guard up because I don't wanna get hurt either. He's like well " I'm drop my guard so you can drop yours" " I want you to be confident"

So now last night he's been out of town and the guy he hit up message me and told me hey yeah he was asking to be in a relationship with me and tried hooking up me

So once again I confronted him and he finally told me he was scared that he was going to lose me and that I was going to lose Interest and I was like what made you think that and he's was like i don't know. I think it has to do with that Wednesday night when we hung it because he got an erection and I didn't but it's cause it wa public and that's not my scene so he felt me up and nothing so maybe he thought I wasn't sexual attractive to him which I am but in private matters. I get embarrass in public

So I NEED ADVICE
Should I be

Just out of curiosity, who is the assertive one in this, you or the Crab?

This Crab sounds like a handful.

Based on what you wrote he may be trying to get a back up in place before he gets more involved.
Probably too immature and insecure to handle the chemistry and level of intensity of this relationship.

That's what I thought because he totally started acting different after that nigh, even that morning of before hang out he text me "good morning to the man I love" and "I can't wait to be all over you" etc. then that happen and he just got distant.

He won't admit it was that I've asked him but I read a lot about cancers cause I'm very interested in him so I know they are seen rice and resentful... And should waited it out.

My question is do you think he talked to someone else because he got insecure and thought I was going to leave him (which I read cancers do to avoid rejection) or cause he's not interested? I don't wanna be the guy he strings along until he finds someone else cause my Scorpio mind thinks that...

Literally now every time I confront him about being distant he like lets his guard down and is like no don't leave ...

No one has been assertive quiet yet in the relationship
I heard crabs can be a handful but it's worth once you can get them out of their shell. And he's pretty amazing and don't wanna give up

Lots of insecurities and miscommunication from both of you. Both signs have the bad BAD habit of making assumptions based on subtle cues: tone of voice, what someone does or says, or doesn't do or say. Tell him straight up that you want clear communication without judgement. If he feels that your not getting a hard on in public was a form of rejection, you WANT him to tell you so you can clear the assumption up.

I do think his looking for other affirmations from other people was his way of protecting from the perceived rejection. Both signs can be a pain in the ass handful when immature, but when two people who aren't immature get together (cancer/scorpio), doesn't matter if it's just friendship or lovers, the connection is very worth it!

How old are both of you?

Posted by ScorpioAEF89
No one has been assertive quiet yet in the relationship
I heard crabs can be a handful but it's worth once you can get them out of their shell. And he's pretty amazing and don't wanna give up

Are you really attracted to this man or flattered that he is attracted to you?
Or is this just a comfy cozy feeling you get when you are with him?

Cancers like assertive partners, he probably doesn't know where he stands with you.
You won't get an erection, you won't pursue him.
Show some of that mythical, Scorpio passion and dominance; you may get a better reaction and commitment from him.

Posted by MoonArtist
Lots of insecurities and miscommunication from both of you.
Both signs have the bad BAD habit of making assumptions based on subtle cues: tone of voice, what someone does or says, or doesn't do or say.
Tell him straight up that you want clear communication without judgement. If he feels that your not getting a hard on in public was a form of rejection, you WANT him to tell you so you can clear the assumption up.

I do think his looking for other affirmations from other people was his way of protecting from the perceived rejection. Both signs can be a pain in the ass handful when immature, but when two people who aren't immature get together (cancer/scorpio), doesn't matter if it's just friendship or lovers, the connection is very worth it!

How old are both of you?

Absolutely could not have said this better, especially the bolded.
The miscommunication and assumptions are terrible.

Just recently got caught up in some nonsense between a fellow Cancer and Scorpio supervisor because of them misreading each other due to lack of and poor communication. Then the Scorpio comes to me with her screwball interpretation to what the Cancer poorly communicated and had me thinking the Cancer was talking mess about me. When in fact the Cancer had poorly communicated that she did not want to do what the Scorpio was telling her to do because she had already helped me do it. 😆

Posted by LunarMaiden

Posted by ScorpioAEF89
No one has been assertive quiet yet in the relationship
I heard crabs can be a handful but it's worth once you can get them out of their shell. And he's pretty amazing and don't wanna give up

Are you really attracted to this man or flattered that he is attracted to you?
Or is this just a comfy cozy feeling you get when you are with him?

Cancers like assertive partners, he probably doesn't know where he stands with you.
You won't get an erection, you won't pursue him.
Show some of that mythical, Scorpio passion and dominance; you may get a better reaction and commitment from him.

click to expand

I didn't wanna scare him off with my assertiveness lol so you think he will like it more if I show it? And I really am attractive to him so much!! He's my type of guy and I don't want to Lose him!! I tell him how I feel all the time is that not good enough? He wants to have sex but wants it to be romantic but I told him next time we see each other we're having sex and he's like haha ok not in the car and i took control and told him that it might just go with it haha and he's like "fine baby haha" should I do more than tell him I like him?

Posted by MoonArtist
Lots of insecurities and miscommunication from both of you. Both signs have the bad BAD habit of making assumptions based on subtle cues: tone of voice, what someone does or says, or doesn't do or say. Tell him straight up that you want clear communication without judgement. If he feels that your not getting a hard on in public was a form of rejection, you WANT him to tell you so you can clear the assumption up.

I do think his looking for other affirmations from other people was his way of protecting from the perceived rejection. Both signs can be a pain in the ass handful when immature, but when two people who aren't immature get together (cancer/scorpio), doesn't matter if it's just friendship or lovers, the connection is very worth it!

How old are both of you?

I'm 25 Scorpio he's 24 cancer, I think it's bad communication on his end. I even brought up the situation about not getting hard after and he's like ha that's not it but it could be him from not getting embarrass and I'm all about communication. Like I wanna talk about the situation and he's like I had enough of it...

Posted by LunarMaiden

Posted by MoonArtist
Lots of insecurities and miscommunication from both of you.
Both signs have the bad BAD habit of making assumptions based on subtle cues: tone of voice, what someone does or says, or doesn't do or say.
Tell him straight up that you want clear communication without judgement. If he feels that your not getting a hard on in public was a form of rejection, you WANT him to tell you so you can clear the assumption up.

I do think his looking for other affirmations from other people was his way of protecting from the perceived rejection. Both signs can be a pain in the ass handful when immature, but when two people who aren't immature get together (cancer/scorpio), doesn't matter if it's just friendship or lovers, the connection is very worth it!

How old are both of you?

Absolutely could not have said this better, especially the bolded.
The miscommunication and assumptions are terrible.

Just recently got caught up in some nonsense between a fellow Cancer and Scorpio supervisor because of them misreading each other due to lack of and poor communication. Then the Scorpio comes to me with her screwball interpretation to what the Cancer poorly communicated and had me thinking the Cancer was talking mess about me. When in fact the Cancer had poorly communicated that she did not want to do what the Scorpio was telling her to do because she had already helped me do it. 😆

click to expand

Ohhhh, don't get me started! Mercury retrograde had me and one of my dearest friends (scorpio) miscommunicating and making the worst assumptions about each other. It was full scale bullshit on both of our parts. Not sure either of us are completely settled from that mess, either (scorpio avoiding it like the plague, and both of us in a self imposed time out with sporadic "hey, you still alive? here's what's new in life. love ya, gotta go"). When things click, it's pure magic. When things don't click, it's hell! I currently want to throw bricks and give hugs. Bloody water sign drama. 😛

Posted by ScorpioAEF89

Posted by MoonArtist
Lots of insecurities and miscommunication from both of you. Both signs have the bad BAD habit of making assumptions based on subtle cues: tone of voice, what someone does or says, or doesn't do or say. Tell him straight up that you want clear communication without judgement. If he feels that your not getting a hard on in public was a form of rejection, you WANT him to tell you so you can clear the assumption up.

I do think his looking for other affirmations from other people was his way of protecting from the perceived rejection. Both signs can be a pain in the ass handful when immature, but when two people who aren't immature get together (cancer/scorpio), doesn't matter if it's just friendship or lovers, the connection is very worth it!

How old are both of you?

I'm 25 Scorpio he's 24 cancer, I think it's bad communication on his end. I even brought up the situation about not getting hard after and he's like ha that's not it but it could be him from not getting embarrass and I'm all about communication. Like I wanna talk about the situation and he's like I had enough of it...

click to expand

Ok, still young enough to need to learn some things in life, but not so young that you two are completely stupid (no offense....I'm a mom, I can say these things lol). Well, he definitely needs to communicate better. You need to stop being afraid of chasing him off with your intensity and interest. As a cancer, I find scorpio intensity to be sexy as hell. It's like catnip to a cat, or drugs to an addict....can't get enough of it! Talk to him, keep talking to him, try to get on the same page with communication, and do take some initiatives with sex, etc. Study him, too. I guarantee he's studying you. Doesn't sound like either of you have been in this together long enough to have everything figured out and squared away.

Also, both of you need to learn not to ever base your actions, etc. on fear of losing someone. As soon as you do base it on fear of loss you'll start compromising your own values and needs.

Nice advice, MoonArtist! 🙂

Thank you, Rapid ~bows~

Cancer's seem to confuse everyone.
Don't feel bad OP, it's these itchy Crabs. 😆

Yeah. Red hot. Cancer + Scorpio. Well those were the days **Sigh**..Didn't work out. We didn't have the right communication, we both have high egos, unforgiving..etc.. I hope yours work out well = ) . Don't be so mysterious.