Explain this behavior please

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brianafay
@brianafay
19 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 2454 · Posts: 30581 · Topics: 372
Ok first off, I actually almost always get along great with cancers somehow so this isn’t hate

But here’s what I don’t understand...and maybe this could be useful feedback to someone willing to hear it...

Why do y’all think people want to sit around and hear about your numerous ailments and misfortune all the time ? It’s not nearly as interesting as you think and actually it’s quite depressing and draining.

I mean I get if you have something going on in your life and you want to share it with friends, seek support, etc and as a friend or loved one of course people want to be there for you...but to hear about every negative thing you’ve experienced day in and day out is truly exhausting.

There’s just more to you than these negative experiences and I think you have the tendency to latch onto them and let it consume you and it makes you quite unpleasant to be around.
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brianafay
@brianafay
19 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 2454 · Posts: 30581 · Topics: 372
Example

My grandfather’s in town with his cancer wife

I have heard about her back issues and spinal surgery not once, but at least twice a day every day since she’s been here.

Somehow every conversation turns into negativity and a pity party

I say “woo! It’s hot as balls outside, thanking the air conditioning gods today”

She goes into a 15 minute explanation about how she can’t deal with heat and it makes her sick and she’ll pass out and have to go to the ER...her sweat glands don’t work right...that’s why she couldn’t live in Florida...when she was 5 she got heat stroke and had to be sprayed down with a hose...she can feel her pulse in temporal artery every time she goes outside. 🤦🏼‍♀️

It’s exhausting af
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brianafay
@brianafay
19 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 2454 · Posts: 30581 · Topics: 372
somebody mentions my baby is the first great grand baby on this side of the family. She goes off about how she has a great grand baby that she’ll never get to meet because her grandson wrote her off and blah blah blah

And she has 7 grandchildren she hardly gets to see cause they all live in other states and it really hurts when your family is spread out like that

As if it’s personal. As if they weren’t the ones that moved away from their families (they were)

Maybe it is personal for her kids though idk I’m sick of listening to it day 3 I can’t imagine how they feel
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brianafay
@brianafay
19 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 2454 · Posts: 30581 · Topics: 372
Posted by Brillo_Pad
Posted by brianafay

Example

My grandfather’s in town with his cancer wife

I have heard about her back issues and spinal surgery not once, but at least twice a day every day since she’s been here.

Somehow every conversation turns into negativity and a pity party

I say “woo! It’s hot as balls outside, thanking the air conditioning gods today”

She goes into a 15 minute explanation about how she can’t deal with heat and it makes her sick and she’ll pass out and have to go to the ER...her sweat glands don’t work right...that’s why she couldn’t live in Florida...when she was 5 she got heat stroke and had to be sprayed down with a hose...she can feel her pulse in temporal artery every time she goes outside. 🤦🏼‍♀️

It’s exhausting af

Hook the hose up.
click to expand


😂thought of it more than once
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brianafay
@brianafay
19 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 2454 · Posts: 30581 · Topics: 372
Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Not really a Cancer thing. I get this from a Cap and a Gemini.

I realize it’s a generalization

Just a pattern I’ve noticed with cancer women in my family specifically and a few friends throughout the years

Funny you mention caps though cause my mother in law does this and she’s a Cap and I always thought she acted like a cancer 😂
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brianafay
@brianafay
19 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 2454 · Posts: 30581 · Topics: 372
Posted by LethalFantasia
Posted by brianafay

Example

My grandfather’s in town with his cancer wife

I have heard about her back issues and spinal surgery not once, but at least twice a day every day since she’s been here.

Somehow every conversation turns into negativity and a pity party

I say “woo! It’s hot as balls outside, thanking the air conditioning gods today”

She goes into a 15 minute explanation about how she can’t deal with heat and it makes her sick and she’ll pass out and have to go to the ER...her sweat glands don’t work right...that’s why she couldn’t live in Florida...when she was 5 she got heat stroke and had to be sprayed down with a hose...she can feel her pulse in temporal artery every time she goes outside. 🤦🏼‍♀️

It’s exhausting af

rofl at how your mind actually remembers all that unnecessary information

i just couldn't tbh

like my eyes are with you but my mind is suddenly somewhere else after 3 mins tbqh

https://i.imgur.com/O9bX1Ki.gif<div class="bqfade">click to expand



Lmao

😆 it’s obviously really getting to me

Had a nightmare already in which she was in my house complaining for hours

This will never happen in reality because she will never come to my house, sorry. My mom can have fun hosting that
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MyStarsShine
@MyStarsShine
9 Years25,000+ Posts

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Posted by brianafay
Posted by LethalFantasia
Posted by brianafay

Example

My grandfather’s in town with his cancer wife

I have heard about her back issues and spinal surgery not once, but at least twice a day every day since she’s been here.





Somehow every conversation turns into negativity and a pity party

I say “woo! It’s hot as balls outside, thanking the air conditioning gods today”

She goes into a 15 minute explanation about how she can’t deal with heat and it makes her sick and she’ll pass out and have to go to the ER...her sweat glands don’t work right...that’s why she couldn’t live in Florida...when she was 5 she got heat stroke and had to be sprayed down with a hose...she can feel her pulse in temporal artery every time she goes outside. 🤦🏼‍♀️

It’s exhausting af

rofl at how your mind actually remembers all that unnecessary information

i just couldn't tbh

like my eyes are with you but my mind is suddenly somewhere else after 3 mins tbqh

Image Not Found

Lmao

😆 it’s obviously really getting to me

Had a nightmare already in which she was in my house complaining for hours

This will never happen in reality because she will never come to my house, sorry. My mom can have fun hosting that
click to expand



Oh heck 😬

Pisces Moon?
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brianafay
@brianafay
19 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 2454 · Posts: 30581 · Topics: 372
Posted by MyStarsShine
Posted by brianafay
Posted by LethalFantasia
Posted by brianafay

Example

My grandfather’s in town with his cancer wife

I have heard about her back issues and spinal surgery not once, but at least twice a day every day since she’s been here.





Somehow every conversation turns into negativity and a pity party

I say “woo! It’s hot as balls outside, thanking the air conditioning gods today”

She goes into a 15 minute explanation about how she can’t deal with heat and it makes her sick and she’ll pass out and have to go to the ER...her sweat glands don’t work right...that’s why she couldn’t live in Florida...when she was 5 she got heat stroke and had to be sprayed down with a hose...she can feel her pulse in temporal artery every time she goes outside. 🤦🏼‍♀️

It’s exhausting af

rofl at how your mind actually remembers all that unnecessary information

i just couldn't tbh

like my eyes are with you but my mind is suddenly somewhere else after 3 mins tbqh

Image Not Found

Lmao

😆 it’s obviously really getting to me

Had a nightmare already in which she was in my house complaining for hours

This will never happen in reality because she will never come to my house, sorry. My mom can have fun hosting that

Oh heck 😬

Pisces Moon?
click to expand


No clue actually
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brianafay
@brianafay
19 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

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Posted by Black-Mamba
Posted by brianafay

Extremely loving and caring people

I want to love and care for them too but fuckkkkkkkk how does one do it?

Maybe it's an age thing

Older ppl do have way more health issues ama are generally ignore by society

Maybe they want your attention and to feel important
click to expand


I have mainly noticed this behavior in cancer women over a certain age

You are right

I wonder they’re mostly all divorced 😬

I mean obviously not my grandpa’s wife but he’s not all there
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brianafay
@brianafay
19 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 2454 · Posts: 30581 · Topics: 372
What is the proper response ?

Like the first couple times they complain about something I’m like “oh no, so sorry to hear that”

“Sheesh, you’re having a rough go at it”

“Well, it’s all up from here” ⛅️🌤☀️

What do you say when it’s like 15 minutes of complaints...hours and days of complaints?

Like how can one person have so many problems?!

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LIMM
@LostinmyMind11
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I hear this more in Scorpios (it's one of the things that actually turned me off of the Scorp I was seeing.. my God I wanted to stick knives in my ears but resorted to telling him to suck it up pussy instead 😂🤷), Virgos (guilty 🙋) and Leo's like to play on that as well...not as bad as the others and it's usually when they are being called out for something.

I think it happens more when you just aren't happy in life... everything feels 10x worse than it really is and it feels like you against the whole world. But you're right...no one wants to hear that shit everyday. Once you realize that shit is gonna happen no matter what you do...you tend to just let it happen and learn to laugh at the ridiculousness. It's basically a state of depression...not full blown but borderline depression imo.
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LIMM
@LostinmyMind11
14 Years10,000+ Posts

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Oh we're talking about old people? Yeah, good luck with that 😂. They will never stop complaining...and honestly majority have the right to do so...I usually laugh about it...not at them but just the shit that comes out of their mouths but I love old people so 🤷

Tbh I didn't read the whole thread but did read what your cancer aunt wrote on FB...sounds exactly like my Aqua mom lol.
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RedQueen
@RedQueen
7 Years

Comments: 1 · Posts: 73 · Topics: 7
Posted by AnotherTaurusGuyReturns

Not really a Cancer thing. I get this from a Cap and a Gemini.


aaaamennnnn

my scorpio ex literally drove me away with his suffocating complaining...eveeeeeryDAYYYY . the world was to blame

didnt want to go anywhere. i would be so happy to go to him...but then the minue i stepped in............everything negative

and sex......just depressive and sex .......and I AM A CANCER AND I RAN

first time ever i broke up

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fishcrabscale
@fishcrabscale2
7 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 0 · Posts: 524 · Topics: 25
Posted by LethalFantasia
Posted by brianafay

Example

My grandfather’s in town with his cancer wife

I have heard about her back issues and spinal surgery not once, but at least twice a day every day since she’s been here.

Somehow every conversation turns into negativity and a pity party

I say “woo! It’s hot as balls outside, thanking the air conditioning gods today”

She goes into a 15 minute explanation about how she can’t deal with heat and it makes her sick and she’ll pass out and have to go to the ER...her sweat glands don’t work right...that’s why she couldn’t live in Florida...when she was 5 she got heat stroke and had to be sprayed down with a hose...she can feel her pulse in temporal artery every time she goes outside. 🤦🏼‍♀️

It’s exhausting af

rofl at how your mind actually remembers all that unnecessary information

i just couldn't tbh

like my eyes are with you but my mind is suddenly somewhere else after 3 mins tbqh

https://i.imgur.com/O9bX1Ki.gif<div class="bqfade">click to expand



😂😂😂 and a libras eyes would gloss over

OP is so good for paying attention to everything, even when she doesnt want to
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fishcrabscale
@fishcrabscale2
7 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 0 · Posts: 524 · Topics: 25
Posted by LethalFantasia
Posted by fishcrabscale2
Posted by LethalFantasia
Posted by brianafay

Example

My grandfather’s in town with his cancer wife

I have heard about her back issues and spinal surgery not once, but at least twice a day every day since she’s been here.

Somehow every conversation turns into negativity and a pity party

I say “woo! It’s hot as balls outside, thanking the air conditioning gods today”

She goes into a 15 minute explanation about how she can’t deal with heat and it makes her sick and she’ll pass out and have to go to the ER...her sweat glands don’t work right...that’s why she couldn’t live in Florida...when she was 5 she got heat stroke and had to be sprayed down with a hose...she can feel her pulse in temporal artery every time she goes outside. 🤦🏼‍♀️

It’s exhausting af

rofl at how your mind actually remembers all that unnecessary information

i just couldn't tbh

like my eyes are with you but my mind is suddenly somewhere else after 3 mins tbqh

Image Not Found

😂😂😂 and a libras eyes would gloss over

OP is so good for paying attention to everything, even when she doesnt want to

With that cancer sun & pisces moon, I'm sure you go on quite the mental field trips during these boring interactionuhnsz ~

😆 😆 x
click to expand



I feel guilty when they expect me to respond and i obvs spaced out and didnt hear their last few sentences 😂 The good thing is they learn to adjust, cut the monologues next time

I know Geminis, youre also similar. your eyes dart out of the window, or wander to general surroundings.
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fishcrabscale
@fishcrabscale2
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Posted by seraph
Posted by fishcrabscale2
Posted by Black-Mamba

I myself don't like being emotionally drained

But im stuck with caps, sag moons, and geminis

Shit almost every sign is draining

Except for Aries

Pisces are the worst

You can shake off these draining negatrons by going to the extreme. The worst case scenarios of their drama. theyd feel upset and wouldnt want to hear more 👻

Negatrons 😄

https://i.postimg.cc/wvZJb3k0/91-A1-CA1-B-60-CC-4950-BA4-F-4-F02-C2-D689-C0.jpg<div class="bqfade">click to expand



😅👍
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LatestTopic
@Sjess
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Posted by elllle
Posted by Sjess
Posted by elllle
Posted by brianafay

I’m going to share some actual posts from my cancer aunt on Facebook recently

Just so you really understand what I mean here



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lol...I use the "Snooze this person for 30 days" feature. 😂🤣😂🤣

Jesus that’s too much. I find that’s what most much older people are like though.

It's not only old folks. My libra/sag grandmother lived until 98....she never complained about anything. My scorpio/aqua dad....80....he didn't either.

I don't even think these people even really know they are doing it and that it exhausts other people.
click to expand



That’s called not being self aware.

Also just all around negative.
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LatestTopic
@Sjess
6 Years500+ Posts

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Posted by elllle
Posted by Sjess
Posted by elllle
Posted by Sjess
Posted by elllle
Posted by brianafay

I’m going to share some actual posts from my cancer aunt on Facebook recently

Just so you really understand what I mean here



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lol...I use the "Snooze this person for 30 days" feature. 😂🤣😂🤣

Jesus that’s too much. I find that’s what most much older people are like though.

It's not only old folks. My libra/sag grandmother lived until 98....she never complained about anything. My scorpio/aqua dad....80....he didn't either.

I don't even think these people even really know they are doing it and that it exhausts other people.

That’s called not being self aware.

Also just all around negative.

Not to be rude....but have you gone back and read any of your posts? You were on this roll for a bit too.
click to expand



Yeah I explained that a few posts up.

That’s what dxp is for
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SelenaKyle
@justagirl
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Posted by brianafay
Posted by nikkistar

I just think old people don't have anything serious going on with their loves, and because of this, their ailments are what they do have. My ex mom in law will go on and on about all of her illnesses to me and she's not a cancer.

When you have nothing else going in your life, you just talk what you know. Lol

Even more depressing
click to expand


It's true- all I hear about from my residents is what is wrong with them or how the mailman is an hour late or forgot the grocery ads. 🙄😐
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RedQueen
@RedQueen
7 Years

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Posted by Black-Mamba
Posted by bumboklatt

@brianafay thats just how they are. Youre a sag so it makes no sense to you just as it made no sense to me

Water signs or feminine signs in general are that way. Sometimes they just want people to listen to them they really appreciate that. They want empathy

Maybe cause ppl dump their bs on us

So we eventually want to also be taken care of

Its not like sags are great ppl

They're pretenders avoiders and depressives
click to expand


hahaha trueeee

i have aaamazing female friends that are saggy

dont cant me wrong...i love the sag men too

if only they could keep it in their heads AS FRIENDS

this is my experience with the three sag men that walked into my life

for some reasons (one even goes back to my childhood) we have an instant connection

we click. its funnnnn....its refreshing....its like meeting partners in crime. but as friendssss. nooooo flirting nothing

but then....the sag man starts chasing me

i mean....realllyyy chasing. everywhere you look...pops up

showing off...helping you....the whole "courting"trying to whooo me over

and its fine for them (annoying for me) as long as I dont return the favor pffffff

as soon...as I......do aaaanything remotely the same

the dissapear like snow in the sun!!!!

itsssssssssssssssssss soooooooooo aanoyingggg

cause

1:i loose a friend....when i didnt started the whole chasing game

2. why on earth would you start something and not finish it??

can someone explain this?

with two of them it was just really distant friends i lost

but one...

we had such a connection since childhood

and even after 20 years....he pulled one on me

i decided never to talk to him again

and i didnt

he tried....when we bumped into eachother two years ago

i just said i was in a hurry and walked away fast

either you are in....or out....and then stay out

i reached an age i dont have time for this behavior anymore
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brianafay
@brianafay
19 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 2454 · Posts: 30581 · Topics: 372
Posted by CancerAquaSagg

You need to tell them. I was told I was negative by my sister and it changed everything from there on. I didn't realise I was complaining a lot. That's when life got tough on me lol. I was a pretty positive person before that but yeah I needed to be told otherwise I don't think I would have realised because it didn't happen overnight it takes time and then you cant even realise how negative you have become.

My Scorp friend told me the same thing! She was like she needs some tough love
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tctaap
@tctaap
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I work with a young Cancer who is so annoying. Half the time she sounds like she's dying cause she whines so much. I try not to have conversations with her because it's like sticking a fork in my eye.

This is a thing that some people do and some people don't. I'm not sure it's a sign thing. My mother was Leo who was always dying . tennis elbow, her period, headache, us kids were literally killing her ... or it was her hemorrhoids or she was lying on the floor hemorrhaging to death because she was on her period. Even my best friend remembers that. We laughed our asses off. It's a joke to this day.

But my mother was an extreme narcissist and I believe this was some sort of attention stab. Or something. She would complain so strangers would help her. She was embarrassing and ridiculous.