let go & move on from unresponsive cancer

it's been 6 months.
i have done all that i can.
i have offered all that i have.
i have been as patient as i could be.
he pushed, he pulled, pushed and pulled... i don't know what he wants.
he did not want to go out with me.
he did not want to hang out with me.
he did not really talk to me.
he would not even take up sleeping with me. lol.
i think this is enough.
i should move on.
i don't expect him to come running back to claim me... i'm mostly positive he won't.
he could be passive for years when i could feel he did like me.
i know he could live with being passive for his whole lifetime.
although i don't understand why he doesn't pursue.
so i have to let go and let go is my only choice.

he said he didn't feel it is right & that we might regret doing it. especially me. he didn't want me to hate him.

---this when i have decided to ignore him completely today & to move on---

i just replied "ok i understand"

i could've had so much to say, but i want to stand by my decision to let go and harbour no more hope in this or encourage this dysfunctional communication

T_T

Cancer men are very confusing. i am going through the same thing right now. I also don't know if i should move on or to wait until he gets his life together.

I could have written this same thing. Good for you moving on!

Ladies. .. this isn't a vent Hopefully? ... 'cause with behaviour like that, ain't no question. .. If u find yourself wondering, That's only on u. Men are just like other human beings, and I bet none of u would have thought twice if u got this behaviour from a woman. ... Just saying. ...

I have good insight that I'll post in another thread about this. I didn't want to hijack your thread.

Yeah, def a waste of 6 months for sure...but the blame isn't all on him. And I don't want to call it "blame" because it's not that you did anything very wrong, except perhaps for thinking there was more than there actually was. I absolutely know the feeling, I went through that push and pull in the early years with my Cancer guy. And the main reason is that he was invested elsewhere. So the message is pretty clear when he isn't responding to you AT ALL. I learned that lesson just as you are now.

Not to give any false hope...but when he was ready to give me his attention, it was after I had already decided to "let go". There's always a glimmer of hope...but you can't sit around waiting for it. Just don't hold against him what you are really mad at yourself for. Cancers are ultimately gentlemen and will never shut you down hard and cold unless you did something glaringly wrong (of which I went through with my Cancer at one point too...he didnt talk to me for a year -- before we were together). Just because he hasn't said he isn't interested in those exact words...his actions say as much.

On the other hand, you're probably missing out so many other opportunities, so welcome this new freedom you have from him!!

hey, thank you all for the support here! *hugs*

i have done all that i could in the past 6 months.
i think 6 months has been enough for me to show my sincerity, patience and seriousness in pursuing him.
but if he still could not be budged, i know i have to let go and move on.
exactly because i cannot wait forever.
it is not fair to me, and it will not be fair to him.

it is not easy for me to completely stay away from him.
i have a stubborn conviction when i choose to love someone.
i know it will not be easy for me to move on, to find love in another... but i have to try... what i can.
i have a warm, aggressive and compulsive way towards approaching the person i love.
but i need to restrain myself.
for the sake of both of us.

hopefully i will continue to be strong in my resolve.

Sometimes that's all you can do. As a Cancer when I've gone into an unresponsive state, I am no longer attached or intertwined in that relationship as you know what the repercussions could be for not responding and you still take that chance.. Heal your heart, and good luck. It's probably for the best.

just because I been where you are I'm going to said this about someone (I don't care which sign they are)

arrogant bastards!!!! people who cannot forgive a small flag of character, a moment of weakness, misunderstanding or a mistake and also became so close to see or listen to the other persons efforts after all that long and to choose not to see the other person is trying to fix their doing, they don't deserved to be loved, period...

some people are so arrogant that they feel so deep when someone does something to them, but usually are the ones that try to minimize when their actions are causing pain and no one in this world is exempt to do so...

sorry is not again cancer... is about people in general.

@cancan26

@canceronthecusp