upset cancer

Today my cancer man just lost in his custody hearing for his daughter it's been dragging on for months and His x is moving to another State with her new hubby it won't be too far about 3hrs away. Should I go to him or let him have alone time, I feel I need to be there for him but I don't want to crowd him. He's very upset and I want to support him and I'm just not sure what approach to take? any ideas from u cancer men and or ladies.

DEFINITELY do not leave him alone at this time...EVEN if he say's he wants to be you need to be there for him.

I KNOW he is in some serious pain and it would be best for you to use your wonderful Piscean skills of making people feel better right now.

Geez, I'm sorry for him! 😢

I agree, he needs you right now, you will be of much support and comfort to him during a time like this.

Cancerlady~ I want to be there and I will be, he's picking his daughter up right now he has her tonite and I don't know if he wants alone time with her or not.....it's hard to get him to spill it sometimes. His son was in the car when we were talking so I know he wasn't saying everything he wanted to say to me. I'm just not sure if I should go there tonight I'd have to bring my 2 kids along and you know kids can be when they are all together I don't want to make him stressed out more than he already is.

I suggest nudging him gently, maybe he needs you, but be ready for rebuttal too, it may happen. In that case, give him time. I'd want everybody to disappear for a while.

Damn, don't go.

Bring your babies too!

The more the merrier! He won't ever tell you that he needs you desperately...he will just expect you to be there and if you aren't. He might not forgive you, besides...we love the pitter patter of little feet! Most of us anyway.

Good luck!

Im calling when I leave work and Im telling him Im coming over and I'll see what he says he knows I won't let him be sad alone I can't take it I feel terrible for him. He won the 1st time now lost the 2nd, how much more can 1 person take? he has spent close to $ 40,000 for this and he must feel sick to lose. I wonder if he'll appeal or let it go.....in away I hope he just lets it go I can't take anymore of this myself it's so sad and draining of everything u have.

What a wondeful use of money. Parents are so thoughtful.

Yeah, he clearly loves his kids, some fathers dont give a f**k

Sarcasm doesn't work well on the internet.

Well Waterbaby

Especially in the "delicate" state I am in...it rather warms my heart to see a man fight so hard for his children. Can't he get joint custody or something?

well it is and he see it that at least he can show her he tried to fight for her and he wanted her with him she's only 3 maybe being with her mother is best he's a wonderful parent but works a lot of long hours and His X is going to be a stay at home mom with her new baby and his daughter. I'll see what happens.

Well that doesn't sound so bad...maybe you can help him see that point of view and he won't feel so bad.

Stay at home moms are the best for children I think, BUT not always the best for a relationship.

"Sarcasm doesn't work well on the internet."

Me, but nevermind.

oh, lol

Mr. Crabby was.

Whoooops guess I was a bit late on that one! Nevermind.

I got the sarcasm- it kinda made me smile halfways as I pictured you saying it in a dry manner. Anywho what I was really thinking was that my crab also battled for custody of his son, but he won it. The kids mom is a real cookiemonster who took off with some loser and partied a lot and gave him hell just to let him see his son. Anywho that was a long time ago, the kid is now 12 and I kinda like the little booger.

Not having kids with cookiemonsters would be better. THERE ARE GOOD WOMEN, DAMMIT.

cancerlady~ Last nite went ok I ended up not going over he was really tired and he took a long nap after 2 days of court he was exhausted. We talked for a long time and he'd do joint but it's hard when his daughter would live in New Jersey amd he lives in Pennsylvania. His X is a liar, and cheater, he hates her. I think it will all work out for the best in the end, Im proud of him for fighting for her but I kind of thought it might turn out this way.

Oh Mr.Crabby I did know u were being sarcastic about parents wasting money but U never know how You would feel or what you would do in the same situation. I don't know if I would go through if I was a man because the mother normally wins unless she's a real piece of Sh*t.

I feel misunderstood and accept my fate.

Waterbaby18, I hope thinks work out for the best for both of you.It must be a very distressing time for your cancer...but you know he's a lucky fellow to have someone like you beside him...it's much harder when you have to deal with this sort of thing alone.

"I feel misunderstood and accept my fate."

Aww, Mr.C, don't be SAD, that's how I feel most of the time...it's not all bad
after you get used to the idea, honestly! *hugs*

oops, typo..things*

Melusine~ yes it is a very hard time for my cancer, and just when I thought it was over now his Lawyer is calling telling him to appeal, I really hope he doesn't I can;t stand to see him get his hopes up and then is just disappointed yet again. Id rather he just let it go and let his X have full custody. Children should be with their Mother unless she's really no good. I'm not against fathers having custody but he works way too much to really do it right, plus i don't know if I want to be left with the responsibility of his child when we move in together, I have my own 2 kids. I like his daughter I do think she's really spoiled and he lets her get away with murder. But I guess I'll have to wait and see what happens.

Maybe the Lawyer needs more money?

I'm with you WB...after awhile, enough is enough. An ending needs to happen so one can have a new beginning. I know how hard this is for him and for the children involved. Ugh.... I hope for brighter days ahead for all of you.

Freebird

Well said, Freebird,an ending needs to happen so one can have a new beginning...I like that.

Waterbaby18, I hope your cancer man realizes that he has tried his best,now it's time to let go of something that looks like a dead end and start afresh.

Take care.