interested or not?

So tell me Cap experts, how to know if those mood swingers are interested or not? I have a rather weird situation going on...fallen for one of them online! We're too far away to meet so easy, not impossible but hard to manage situation. And I'm a Sag that needs to meet face to face to know the true feeling with the person I'm into. Although it's always just like I thought when I fallen for them already...My situation is complicated even more.I was in long term relationship when I started talking with him, I don't know why but I fell for this guy for first time in years. I'm not a cheater but when I fall for someone there is no going back, I have to get them and I'm definitely over the person I was with before. So in the time we were talking I was on and off with my ex multiple times, Cap knew about it, only thing he didn't knew is I didn't completely end it with first guy. So I know I come of as a player now with saying this but there is so many into this story that I can't all write here so please try not to judge.Person I'm with has cheated on me for years and I found it in my heart to forgive and stay with him after which he stayed loyal to me.So please disregard this part of the story and tell me what you think about my Cap's behavior. He comes of as very jealous person. Not very social, doesn't go out much etc BUT I have been suspecting for long time he talks to many girls like he does to me or at least similar or at least few more girls. Since I'm direct person I asked direct question which he just avoided. Every time something similar comes in question he will avoid it in some way but I won't get an answer. At some points he just disappears and doesn't talk to me for few days and every time has good explanation for it. From the way I see it, person interested in you doesn't disappear like that. Then, when I do the same thing he will come chasing after me. I'm really tired of this situation and playing cat-mouse game in which I'm starting to lose since I talk to him more than he does to me and overall started thinking I'm more into him than he is into me. If someone doesn't think about me whole day do I really need them? If they do think but don't bother talking to me, again, why do I need them? This is my way of thinking, so tell me what you think about this situation. Reason why I'm even talking about this is cause I'm planning a trip to visit him and thinking is it really worth to risk everything for him? I'm a huge risk taker, always follow my heart and fearless but I'm not an idiot either to risk everything for something that just isn't that much important. So what you think of his behavior? Jealousy to the max at some points, huge interest in me from the start, really caring for me but then just disappearing like that and avoiding tickling questions. He'll give some diplomatic answer to it in order not to lie but also not to answer my question. Lately he got mad at me in fact and has been colder and less talkative ever since.He won't say he's mad either...Now from my past experience I have dated shortly 1 Cap guy that I can described as literally the worst person I met and completely cold. He cheated on another girlfriend while she was in hospital with me(who he broke up with earlier after a really bad event in my life) and talked to few more girls all at the same time. Long story short we didn't even fight in the end, I wasn't that much into him but was impressed how someone can be so heartless and cold. As I don't want to judge one by another, I'd appreciate opinions of others on this and your experience and knowledge of Caps

Posted by clownloyal
they're like bunnies, hunt w/ precision and stealth DON'T MAKE ANY SUDDEN MOVEMENTS

Hm...he kinda started hunting me first since I'm rarely the one to make first moves with men. But there was a lot of sudden moves. I literally had to do something bad to make him react and show any feeling. I'm not someone who does bad things but he's so closed I can't get anything out of him unless I do something unexpected, then there is a reaction finally. But with that I'm afraid I'll chase him away if I continue doing it cause they don't like it and I'm actually not like that but he just won't open up a slightest bit.I'm not talking about expecting to tell me exactly what he thinks or feels but some hints might be more than fine.I'm a smart person, can read between lines, can understand hints easily but if there's nothing of that I'm just clueless and left to think whatever I want, good or bad...

Meet in person. Texting and all is just to pass messages not feelings. You might not have the courage to say your feelings in person but you can easily say in text.

Posted by Capricorn91
Meet in person. Texting and all is just to pass messages not feelings. You might not have the courage to say your feelings in person but you can easily say in text.

I agree with you completely and think the same way. I know where I stand at when I meet someone in person only BUT this is much easier said than done since it takes a lot for us to meet. I'm talking about hours away flights not just another town etc...

Posted by Malak

Posted by Capricorn91
Meet in person. Texting and all is just to pass messages not feelings. You might not have the courage to say your feelings in person but you can easily say in text.

I agree with you completely and think the same way. I know where I stand at when I meet someone in person only BUT this is much easier said than done since it takes a lot for us to meet. I'm talking about hours away flights not just another town etc...

click to expand

Oh.. I didn't read the post properly. Ya then that is the way. Also you can video chat maybe.

Thank you very much for sharing your thoughts, really appreciate it.

For video calls yes we had a few. I'm by nature quite impatient and having a really hard time controlling that sometimes but I try to more and more. The last part you wrote is like you described me and not them lol I came to realize that lately that it's literally what I'm doing so often and have done it with him as well. I come of with my defensive mechanism every time that I'm interested with someone, if I'm not I won't even bother much about them. Just our ways are probably quite different.They appear to be cold and I appear to put on some crazy temper so it's like if you can stand it you're ok for me....when in reality I'm such a calm person and really find it hard to show my emotions to someone. I can shower the ones I love with attention and would simply do anything in the world for them. But I think I went too far on the other side with my own defense mechanism and he probably doesn't see me the way I am now so in a way I kinda don't know how to repair damage I made.

With the talking more part well that's always been my part in a way since he doesn't talk that much in general. About jealousy part I get that, I stated at the start that I'm not a fan of that situation and that I can't talk to him they way I want as long as I'm in relationship with someone else. He seemed like he understands my situation even tho I never really described, it was weird in a way like he already knew what I've been through with that guy. He said multiple times that I deserve better and that I should leave him. How could he possibly know that? Later I did tell him some details but what he said before was somehow weird.

Anyway, I'm trying to not push him much to open up, came to realize when he wants to he will, even if it's making it harder for me it's just how it is and I have to accept that. I'm trying to just be around and see how we get along further. For someone who likes to plan a lot ahead it takes huge effort to stay calm and not ask million questions lol

Your suspicions are likely true.

Posted by pinkbird03
Your suspicions are likely true.

I'm not sure what you meant to say here 😄 which suspicions you were referring to?

Posted by RooSagicorn

Posted by Malak

Posted by pinkbird03
Your suspicions are likely true.

I'm not sure what you meant to say here 😄 which suspicions you were referring to?

Oh & I think she means that he’s talking to others.

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Yeah I'm thinking that too, but regardless I don't really expect to be first and only person he talked to like that anyway, it wouldn't really be rational way of thinking. Somehow would simply like to be special to him if you can get what I mean. Time will show how things will go I guess

Posted by RooSagicorn
Lol. Patience is key with a Cap. Also, my Cap will not talk to me when I’m mad. He waits til I have calmed down and am acting like i can discuss things rationally lol. Hmm probably is a good idea.

I am very hesitant at first, and that caused a lot of problems in the beginning. So we went through some crap, he disappeared for 2 1/2 months & we got back together. I find he was far more ready to commit than I was actually. But things are good now, we are on the same page🙂 so we were committed, but probably short term, now it’s more long term.

Anyway, they are so future oriented. It is important to remember.

This is so true lol I act same way and he also disappears if I'm mad until some time has passed and I'm more calmed lol which annoys me cause I'd rather discuss but it really might be better what they do, people think better with cooler head lol

I'm glad they are future oriented, I'm like that too, I prefer to plan ahead then to live in a moment not thinking much about tomorrow. I noticed some characteristics at myself from them from time to time maybe cause my birthday is so close to Cap and at very end of Sag or I have something from them in my placements.

I was kinda incredibly impatient and ready to run away at the slightest sign of not getting along but I'm becoming more calmed and think we're more getting on the same page. In a way I show him myself in completely different light than what I am in reality so now I have to undo the damage lol

Oh I forgot one part in my story. At start he seemed somehow more open than later. Once he even told me after he was away for 1 day or so, something like: I thought I can do this but it turns out I missed you too much...later he stopped saying things like that, but I really was giving him some hard time with being on and of, running away then coming back etc so didn't really give him much reasons to trust me but it was all only cause our situation is so complicated and we can't even meet in person so easy. I want to get to a point to know where we stand at but I'm afraid to take that step to travel and see him yet

I've looked a bit about my chart now. Born on 20th. Don't know much about it tho but maybe you'll hve more insight in it lol so these are my results: Sun Sag, Moon Aries, Mars and Pluto Scorpio, Jupiter Aqua, Neptun Cap, Mercury, Venus, Uranus, Saturn all Sag..to not go further with all details lol so all in all I only have neptune Cap

After I posted this i read interpretation of it and kinda realized wgere our disconnect comes from-my damn Aries Moon lol way to impatient that comes to affect temper at some points so I really have to work on controlling that part of myself,regarding him or other aspects. It's just not a really good feature but at least nowI know where my problem comes from. On the same site there is a match calculator according to whic we should be quite good match actually. Not taking it as 100% accurate ofc but my chart was incredibly accurate in describing me to some fine details so this might be true as well. I've took off my foot from gas pedal now and not rushing anything anymore so hoping things work out well if it's meant to be with some efforts from both sides 🙂

I guess only time can tell?

As I thought the one I was telling you about lost interest, but he phone me unexpectedly.

We ended up talking and he was gonna ask me out like last minute for late lunch... but I already had plans, so it sounds like when he tried to call me last night he was also gonna do last minute invite. it was 7:30pm

I let him know when am I free next, he goes lest aim for that day and touch base the day before.

He soudned nervous on the phone at first. Somehow he seems a bit warmer than last time. Guess my decision to reach out to him was right.

I find last minute invite a bit odd. Don't we earth sign like to plan? LOL

anyway I think a bit of humor would help make them laugh. and be patient.

Posted by StrawberryJam
I guess only time can tell?

As I thought the one I was telling you about lost interest, but he phone me unexpectedly.

We ended up talking and he was gonna ask me out like last minute for late lunch... but I already had plans, so it sounds like when he tried to call me last night he was also gonna do last minute invite. it was 7:30pm

I let him know when am I free next, he goes lest aim for that day and touch base the day before.

He soudned nervous on the phone at first. Somehow he seems a bit warmer than last time. Guess my decision to reach out to him was right.

I find last minute invite a bit odd. Don't we earth sign like to plan? LOL

anyway I think a bit of humor would help make them laugh. and be patient.

Maybe he thought you'd prefer him to be spontaneous? xD idk really but my ex Virgo was less into planning than me, Sag so never know how one will think lol I have a very bad aspect from my moon in Aries that makes me so impatient and want to know everything and right away...I even told him that cause he noticed I get temperamental lol and he clearly doesn't like it. So now I'm trying to control myself more, I'm aware it's a bad aspect of myself and can't really blame him for not liking it, even I don't like it about myself lol

I'm giving him some space now, he can contact me when he wants next, I won't put more efforts in it since I'm not really sure does he like it or not. He does question me why I didn't write to him when I don't but still, he can start reaching out first again, should know by now that I'm interested so I leave things up to him now. He's a man after all should take firsts steps (in my vision at least and how I prefer man to be)

Posted by Malak

Posted by StrawberryJam
I guess only time can tell?

As I thought the one I was telling you about lost interest, but he phone me unexpectedly.

We ended up talking and he was gonna ask me out like last minute for late lunch... but I already had plans, so it sounds like when he tried to call me last night he was also gonna do last minute invite. it was 7:30pm

I let him know when am I free next, he goes lest aim for that day and touch base the day before.

He soudned nervous on the phone at first. Somehow he seems a bit warmer than last time. Guess my decision to reach out to him was right.

I find last minute invite a bit odd. Don't we earth sign like to plan? LOL

anyway I think a bit of humor would help make them laugh. and be patient.

Maybe he thought you'd prefer him to be spontaneous? xD idk really but my ex Virgo was less into planning than me, Sag so never know how one will think lol I have a very bad aspect from my moon in Aries that makes me so impatient and want to know everything and right away...I even told him that cause he noticed I get temperamental lol and he clearly doesn't like it. So now I'm trying to control myself more, I'm aware it's a bad aspect of myself and can't really blame him for not liking it, even I don't like it about myself lol

I'm giving him some space now, he can contact me when he wants next, I won't put more efforts in it since I'm not really sure does he like it or not. He does question me why I didn't write to him when I don't but still, he can start reaching out first again, should know by now that I'm interested so I leave things up to him now. He's a man after all should take firsts steps (in my vision at least and how I prefer man to be)

click to expand

it's good that you have lots of awareness to work on yourself. this cap has the same moon as you. That's probably why he was asking for my instagram account for like 10 times on first date. I kept saying no lets get to know each other in real life first!

Yea I agree let the man ask you out, it's a gift to them they like it.

Posted by StrawberryJam

Posted by Malak

Posted by StrawberryJam
I guess only time can tell?

As I thought the one I was telling you about lost interest, but he phone me unexpectedly.

We ended up talking and he was gonna ask me out like last minute for late lunch... but I already had plans, so it sounds like when he tried to call me last night he was also gonna do last minute invite. it was 7:30pm

I let him know when am I free next, he goes lest aim for that day and touch base the day before.

He soudned nervous on the phone at first. Somehow he seems a bit warmer than last time. Guess my decision to reach out to him was right.

I find last minute invite a bit odd. Don't we earth sign like to plan? LOL

anyway I think a bit of humor would help make them laugh. and be patient.

Maybe he thought you'd prefer him to be spontaneous? xD idk really but my ex Virgo was less into planning than me, Sag so never know how one will think lol I have a very bad aspect from my moon in Aries that makes me so impatient and want to know everything and right away...I even told him that cause he noticed I get temperamental lol and he clearly doesn't like it. So now I'm trying to control myself more, I'm aware it's a bad aspect of myself and can't really blame him for not liking it, even I don't like it about myself lol

I'm giving him some space now, he can contact me when he wants next, I won't put more efforts in it since I'm not really sure does he like it or not. He does question me why I didn't write to him when I don't but still, he can start reaching out first again, should know by now that I'm interested so I leave things up to him now. He's a man after all should take firsts steps (in my vision at least and how I prefer man to be)

it's good that you have lots of awareness to work on yourself. this cap has the same moon as you. That's probably why he was asking for my instagram account for like 10 times on first date. I kept saying no lets get to know each other in real life first!

Yea I agree let the man ask you out, it's a gift to them they like it.

click to expand

There you go then, that's aries talking from him xD it''s really not a good feature at all, that impatience sucks a lot...

well unfortunately mine can't ask me out, we're way too far away for that so we have to figure things out online before we get into anything cause it would take a lot for us to be together if we come to that point. It's so much easier to meet in person but we just can't do that so easy