I'm fine.. 🙂 ..didnt see you around, are you working hard lovely? :p
LeoFemale-CapMale-Chances? (Page 2)
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Posted by leowwwCool, dear! 😄 happy for you ... Lemme see for how long I can be patient and before I lose all my senses, if he'll say something positive and reassure that he'll be there... Lol, I want to think of him as one of those loyal, committed Caps. Don't know! I'll surely keep what you said in mind and concentrate on my world and take him outta my mind (then he'll pop up again, lol). Phew! I'm also an all-attitude woman, lol. I know that he loves me and hates me for the same! 😛Posted by InLoveWithLifeThe sharing part is gonna come up ...when hes ready.Posted by leowwwHe has said ily twice or thrice. When we meet personally, he's all sweet. But while chatting, I'm made to feel like a stranger half the time!
@inlovewithlife
But you know how he feels... He's told you he loves you.
There's a difference between doubt and not being told ily enough.
Now if you have reasons to doubt how he feels that's another story.
How can you love someone and not share anything about your past/present/future plans with them, not even bother to know how they are and what they are doing, ignore them for days, and not answer even one call or return any other, say that you're always busy while you have time for work and so many other activities like reading, writing, reviewing books, etc.? I can't act like that when I love someone, so I get all these doubts! Is that wrong?
Trust. I know how frustrated we leos get
when we want something...we want it.. YESTERDAY 😛
Is this man worth it?
Then you'll have to be patient ...
as for not caring how you are doing...chances are you are chasing after him
so he doesnt even have to do ask any of it or wonder
They do get distracted in their own worlds
All of that doesnt mean he doesnt love you
means you are 2 very different people
We all love in different ways, doesnt mean one way is better than the other
by nagging him about it youre basically telling him the way he loves is not good enough
if so...leave him girl..
otherwise
respect, understanding and patience
do your own thing as I said, go out, work out, read a book, go shopping, hang out with your girls
not to get back at him but simply to get busy yourself
When you meet hes better at showing what he feels because you are there
When youre apart he has to say these things..expressing feelings with words...not their forte.
Me and my cap:
hes the most patient person in the world
I am not
he's mellow and cheeky....and im all attitude, im all over the place
makes him laugh, finds it amusing, he enjoys teasing me and it drives me fcking crazy lol
we have highs and lows
so far the ups have always made up for the downs.
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Posted by RumiLPosted by InLoveWithLifeyou're welcome.. you're very kind :-)Posted by RumiLSweetheart! I don't know you, and I don't know about our Venus, Mars, Moon stuff either! But a sweet or positive reply is any day sweet. Thank you for your time. 🙂
IDK about LDR but my Leo cousin is married to a Cap! They are so cute together.. so much in love 🙂
But, sis is cancer moon/Virgo venus/Taurus mars
Bro-in-law is Virgo moon.. forgot his venus/mars ..sorry : D
...depends on your synastry.
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Haha, when I see someone sweet, they appear like chocolate to my eyes and I become a cub and pounce on them! You better be careful! 😉
I still think he's interested because he still talks to you. Caps don't usually waste their time on someone they don't like.
But I still do sense incompatibility. So I'm not sure what will happen in the future if you decide to stay with him.
But I still do sense incompatibility. So I'm not sure what will happen in the future if you decide to stay with him.
Ear Foreverloveme,
I decided to take it seriously, but then he said "I thought this meeting would be an opportunity to see if it would work out". Because he came back, I thought he still had hopes for the relationship.
Maybe that's where I made a mistake? Okay... Guess you're right. At the rate at which things are going, this relationship doesn't seem to be in his list at all!
I'll continue to stay away and maintain a distance and not get close to him anymore, till (if he ever will) he expresses willingness to commit. I'll try to forget him and focus on my own life.
You've been of great help. Nice of you, really. And if you need my help any day, I'm always there! 🙂
If this were not a public forum, I'd share my contact details with you. Lol, that's how I am. Like a kid, I develop a bonding and trust so easily if I like someone. 🙂
I decided to take it seriously, but then he said "I thought this meeting would be an opportunity to see if it would work out". Because he came back, I thought he still had hopes for the relationship.
Maybe that's where I made a mistake? Okay... Guess you're right. At the rate at which things are going, this relationship doesn't seem to be in his list at all!
I'll continue to stay away and maintain a distance and not get close to him anymore, till (if he ever will) he expresses willingness to commit. I'll try to forget him and focus on my own life.
You've been of great help. Nice of you, really. And if you need my help any day, I'm always there! 🙂
If this were not a public forum, I'd share my contact details with you. Lol, that's how I am. Like a kid, I develop a bonding and trust so easily if I like someone. 🙂
Posted by pinkbird03"I love you but I won't commit; I don't think there's a future." - he hasn't said this, but that's how things seem now... Sad, yeah. With support from a few friends and you ladies, I think I'll somehow overcome all this. Thanks a lot for being there! 🙂
I still think he's interested because he still talks to you. Caps don't usually waste their time on someone they don't like.
But I still do sense incompatibility. So I'm not sure what will happen in the future if you decide to stay with him.
Posted by InLoveWithLifeWell, it has been 7 months. I would get impatient too. Don't worry I know you'll move on happily and find the man of your dreams soon. Never settle for less! ❤️Posted by pinkbird03"I love you but I won't commit; I don't think there's a future." - he hasn't said this, but that's how things seem now... Sad, yeah. With support from a few friends and you ladies, I think I'll somehow overcome all this. Thanks a lot for being there! 🙂
I still think he's interested because he still talks to you. Caps don't usually waste their time on someone they don't like.
But I still do sense incompatibility. So I'm not sure what will happen in the future if you decide to stay with him.click to expand
Posted by pinkbird03Thank you, Pinkbird03! I hope so. And I really want him to be happy (at present, he gives subtle hints on social sites saying that he's feeling lonely, but he'll never admit it). Hope future has something better for him, too.Posted by InLoveWithLifeWell, it has been 7 months. I would get impatient too. Don't worry I know you'll move on happily and find the man of your dreams soon. Never settle for less! ❤️Posted by pinkbird03"I love you but I won't commit; I don't think there's a future." - he hasn't said this, but that's how things seem now... Sad, yeah. With support from a few friends and you ladies, I think I'll somehow overcome all this. Thanks a lot for being there! 🙂
I still think he's interested because he still talks to you. Caps don't usually waste their time on someone they don't like.
But I still do sense incompatibility. So I'm not sure what will happen in the future if you decide to stay with him.click to expand
And may you and your Cap have a great future, dear!
That's very kind of you! Good luck! Let us know how it goes when you do finally talk to him!
And thanks for the kind wishes!
And thanks for the kind wishes!
Posted by RumiLI need a vacation friend. Haha what are you doing?Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428I'm fine.. 🙂 ..didnt see you around, are you working hard lovely? :pPosted by RumiLI am lovely just been resting and working same Ole and you?Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428Hey you 🙂 ..how have you been? : D
Earth and fire just needs to have the right balance without astrology play. It will be harder for easy for earth to befriend fire. They are magnetic together, as far as compromise and support it has to a right mix.
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@Op snap out of it. Get your shit together and focus on you. Cause when a decent guy comes and knows the morals, values, respect, and courtesy manners and actually knows how to treat a woman. A woman would know and so would the guy if he is mature, and a proper upbringing in his bloodline. And actually it is better to find a like minded long term partner that shares the same or almost ideal goals or interests.
Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428Thank you for the boost! I hope I will be able to do it. I'm known for caring for people even when they don't care for me. In this guy's case, because he's confusing and giving me mixed signals, I guess it's going to be difficult for me to overcome my own emotions. I'll try my best. Will need all the help and support of friends for the next few weeks to a month or so till I'm totally out of it. Thanks again! 🙂
@Op snap out of it. Get your shit together and focus on you. Cause when a decent guy comes and knows the morals, values, respect, and courtesy manners and actually knows how to treat a woman. A woman would know and so would the guy if he is mature, and a proper upbringing in his bloodline. And actually it is better to find a like minded long term partner that shares the same or almost ideal goals or interests.
What's your placements ?
What's his? I'm just curious now?
I'm a Leo Sun - Scorpio Moon. I know that his sun sign is Cap. I don't know the other placements, FDTW, sorry.
Posted by ButtWipePosted by InLoveWithLifeAnytimePosted by ButtWipeThanks for reading the post and leaving comments.Posted by rockyroadicecreamI like that slang you just used.
Oh gawd.
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Lol! The image - what a Cap guy wishes he could be but he can't be? "Expressive and open with what he wants to say"? Thanks for the laugh!
So I have an idea that maybe you can use someday. It's positive reinforcement! When he does something you like, reward him. Give him praise, hugs, kisses, pictures, or any other kind of token. They like feeling like they did a good job at making their girl happy.
Posted by pinkbird03Oh! That's cool! So far I've only given him genuine compliments, and you must've noticed it already, dear, I give generous compliments quite easily and naturally! That makes him shy and no reply! Lol! Now I'm coming to learn their ways, but I've always found his shyness SO cute!
So I have an idea that maybe you can use someday. It's positive reinforcement! When he does something you like, reward him. Give him praise, hugs, kisses, pictures, or any other kind of token. They like feeling like they did a good job at making their girl happy.
OK, I'll try sending photos (which is very unusual for me till someone asks me for it) and hugs when we meet personally. 🙂
Oh so double fixed as well and he is earth yeah earth and fire energy is good in the beginning for sure it's the are you compatible for the long run.
Posted by CAPLOCK
@ InLoveWithLife - In response from other thread . Since he just started his new job, his concerns maybe job security and performance.
1. Responds to text faster now = He's expecting your text. He's expecting it because even though he doesn't say so, he's glad to hear from you. It helps him get through the day/ new job which can be stressful.
Card #1 - Say this to him.
" You're such a hard working man. "
Lol ( I deserve $ 100 for this) This is like shooting a bullet.
Card #2 - Instead of calling him buddy, call him " Your Hero" lol ( Ca-Ching, another $ 100 please )
CapLock! Lol! I must say that you're CUTE (hope you don't stop talking to me now!😉 )
He never shares any work related stuff with me, so I have not had many opportunities to comment/praise his hardworking nature. I'll look for the right time and tell him so.
Lol! I'm a Leo, you know us, we're loaded with kiddish pride like we are the best! So I don't think I can ever call him (or anyone for that matter 'my hero')! 😄
But once, when I was genuinely impressed by his gentlemanly ways when we met in person, while texting, I said, "my gentleman" and all he sent was an emoticon but set my Leo spirit on fire!
And once, (that @ $ &% % *;*-/?(+!!!!!) When I asked him "are you the one?" (I was deeply into my feelings then and expected him to be a man and say, "yes, dear"), he was diplomatic and said, "what do you think?" Hmph!
Then I said, "I think, know, and feel that you're the one."
Hahaha, so this is how you guys deal with compliments? But we Leos give compliments in loads and expect them in return, too. So we are left disappointed at times...
But thanks a lot for the response, dear Caplock! Sweet of you! 🙂
Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428The long-term chances, that's what the whole discussion is about, trying to figure out. 🙂
Oh so double fixed as well and he is earth yeah earth and fire energy is good in the beginning for sure it's the are you compatible for the long run.
Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428Where do you wanna go for vacation? I can come along : D .. Thing is, I want to go to a nearby town for some work but it keeps getting delayed 😢Posted by RumiLI need a vacation friend. Haha what are you doing?Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428I'm fine.. 🙂 ..didnt see you around, are you working hard lovely? :pPosted by RumiLI am lovely just been resting and working same Ole and you?Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428Hey you 🙂 ..how have you been? : D
Earth and fire just needs to have the right balance without astrology play. It will be harder for easy for earth to befriend fire. They are magnetic together, as far as compromise and support it has to a right mix.
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Posted by InLoveWithLifeSend pictures a lot. Cute ones! Maybe sexy ones lol. What guy doesn't love that?? But don't expect him to do it back. It's about rewarding him. Not about you.Posted by pinkbird03Oh! That's cool! So far I've only given him genuine compliments, and you must've noticed it already, dear, I give generous compliments quite easily and naturally! That makes him shy and no reply! Lol! Now I'm coming to learn their ways, but I've always found his shyness SO cute!
So I have an idea that maybe you can use someday. It's positive reinforcement! When he does something you like, reward him. Give him praise, hugs, kisses, pictures, or any other kind of token. They like feeling like they did a good job at making their girl happy.
OK, I'll try sending photos (which is very unusual for me till someone asks me for it) and hugs when we meet personally. 🙂click to expand
Have you two made a home run ?? Sorry if I missed this. I think I have bad short term memory sometimes especially with reading
Posted by pinkbird03A home run? No, sweetheart! I think there's something really crazy going on... I'm waiting till the weekend (remember even you told me to wait?) To get a clearer picture! Seems like both of us are taking turns at confusing each other now! Phew!Posted by InLoveWithLifeSend pictures a lot. Cute ones! Maybe sexy ones lol. What guy doesn't love that?? But don't expect him to do it back. It's about rewarding him. Not about you.Posted by pinkbird03Oh! That's cool! So far I've only given him genuine compliments, and you must've noticed it already, dear, I give generous compliments quite easily and naturally! That makes him shy and no reply! Lol! Now I'm coming to learn their ways, but I've always found his shyness SO cute!
So I have an idea that maybe you can use someday. It's positive reinforcement! When he does something you like, reward him. Give him praise, hugs, kisses, pictures, or any other kind of token. They like feeling like they did a good job at making their girl happy.
OK, I'll try sending photos (which is very unusual for me till someone asks me for it) and hugs when we meet personally. 🙂
Have you two made a home run ?? Sorry if I missed this. I think I have bad short term memory sometimes especially with readingclick to expand
Will update you soon! 🙂
Posted by CAPLOCKHahaha, smart! 😄
@InlovewithLife - Thank you for the compliment my darling. You radiate like the sun....And Just like the earth orbits around it, your light is for the world to see 😄
Ok enough compliments 🙂 until next time...
Dear #ForeverLoveMe #PinkBird03 #Caplock
I hope you remember the gist of the novels I posted earlier! 😉
(Mixed signals, no clear yes or no to commitment even after 7 months, acts romantic/gentlemanly at times, but withdraws and/or gives crazy answers when we get intimate over chat or when I confront him, does he love me really or not, will he commit or not?)
When I confronted him 3 days ago, he said that he was busy then and would give me clear answers over the weekend. And during the weekend, we managed to get into further arguments (I bet this is one more of that clever Cap's ways of running away) and the questions remain unanswered! He accuses me of putting him through on-and-off cycles while he's the one who makes me mad when things are going good by pulling away, and then, yes, I yell.
The last time, I convinced him that I am not the ONLY one who's responsible for all the misunderstanding and problem. Then I deleted his contact details. Today I checked his blog in which he's posted a short poem (saying 'welcome back' sarcastically).
Tell me, would any of you Caps, or any sane human waste time posting a sarcastic poem on your blog on someone if you don't like them/consider them a nuisance? What's with him?
A friend suggested this possibility - that he may love me but is avoiding commitment because his parents may object (as we come belong to different cultures). If this is the case, what do you think he'd do? Will he leave me?
If he's gonna love me now and leave me years later, let him do that now! How can I deal with someone who is so tight-lipped and I have no clue what his silence means?
Help, please? What's going on and what should I do?
I hope you remember the gist of the novels I posted earlier! 😉
(Mixed signals, no clear yes or no to commitment even after 7 months, acts romantic/gentlemanly at times, but withdraws and/or gives crazy answers when we get intimate over chat or when I confront him, does he love me really or not, will he commit or not?)
When I confronted him 3 days ago, he said that he was busy then and would give me clear answers over the weekend. And during the weekend, we managed to get into further arguments (I bet this is one more of that clever Cap's ways of running away) and the questions remain unanswered! He accuses me of putting him through on-and-off cycles while he's the one who makes me mad when things are going good by pulling away, and then, yes, I yell.
The last time, I convinced him that I am not the ONLY one who's responsible for all the misunderstanding and problem. Then I deleted his contact details. Today I checked his blog in which he's posted a short poem (saying 'welcome back' sarcastically).
Tell me, would any of you Caps, or any sane human waste time posting a sarcastic poem on your blog on someone if you don't like them/consider them a nuisance? What's with him?
A friend suggested this possibility - that he may love me but is avoiding commitment because his parents may object (as we come belong to different cultures). If this is the case, what do you think he'd do? Will he leave me?
If he's gonna love me now and leave me years later, let him do that now! How can I deal with someone who is so tight-lipped and I have no clue what his silence means?
Help, please? What's going on and what should I do?
Can you share more about what he said to you? It's the only way I can kind of understand his perspective so I can try to help!
When I confronted him, asking for clear answers, he asked me if he can answer them over the weekend as he was busy then. I said "sooner the better" (because 'busy' is what he always says!). So for the moment, he said, "I've made myself clear before." As I asked what he meant by that, in context he said that, he said, "That we're incompatible". Here I got annoyed. Because he said that during the 2nd or 3rd month after which he said ily once, made some sweet romantic gestures and such! The next round of arguments started here. Earlier he used to run away from arguments. But over the weekend, he did actually argue, accusing me of saying/doing things he doesn't like, and defending himself. We argued about a lot of things from the past, too.
Finally, I gave him a clear explanation of what all made me angry (like being busy and not responding to my messages but having time for social media updates, reading books and drinking!), there was no reply. This happened on Saturday. I sent him a 'hope everything is okay on your side' text at night, because both of us are kinda sensitive (even if he won't admit) and i was genuinely worried. On Sunday morning, I pinged him to remind that he had said he'd answer my questions. No reply till now!
But now I noticed that on Saturday night, he's posted a short poem, a sarcastic welcome back poem, the gist of which sounds like "phew! She's back again!"
What does all this mean—
If a man is not interested, will he do all this? If he's interested, can't he simply admit it?
Finally, I gave him a clear explanation of what all made me angry (like being busy and not responding to my messages but having time for social media updates, reading books and drinking!), there was no reply. This happened on Saturday. I sent him a 'hope everything is okay on your side' text at night, because both of us are kinda sensitive (even if he won't admit) and i was genuinely worried. On Sunday morning, I pinged him to remind that he had said he'd answer my questions. No reply till now!
But now I noticed that on Saturday night, he's posted a short poem, a sarcastic welcome back poem, the gist of which sounds like "phew! She's back again!"
What does all this mean—
If a man is not interested, will he do all this? If he's interested, can't he simply admit it?
As a Cap I really dont like dramas......will avoid them at all cost
Posted by Jalent99That's what I remember reading about Caps in general, too. So what does all this mean? Is this his way of slowly ending the relationship?
As a Cap I really dont like dramas......will avoid them at all cost
Posted by InLoveWithLifeDepends from how much I like the person, but if its a repetition of drama I will avoid and run....Posted by Jalent99That's what I remember reading about Caps in general, too. So what does all this mean? Is this his way of slowly ending the relationship?
As a Cap I really dont like dramas......will avoid them at all costclick to expand
And I wont outrightly post sarcasm on the blog of someone I like. Caps are all about pride and would not put someone down like that....seems like he is pissed/had enough and made up his mind given his actions.....
And Caps rarely change their mind
And Caps rarely change their mind
It seems like the arguments are the issue. What's throwing you for a loop is the poem. are you sure it's about you? You never really went away so how can he be happy you're back?
There are few things that stand out for me that are red flags that you should not take lightly since you will be the one being vulnerable which can expose your feelings which means you'll be the one carrying all of the mental and emotional burdens that come with dealing with a self professed commitmentphobic man.
"(both times, I went to meet him). Before our first meeting, he confessed his love for me, and instantly I said I said I loved him, too"
I might nitpick this situation...
When meeting a man allow him to put in some of the leg work because the more work ie his time, his money, his energy he applies to a relationship the MORE mental and emotional investment he'll have towards you.
Screeeeeeeeeeeeeech those brakes. He's a stranger. You're a stranger. He does not love you. He does not know the REAL you, not the online you but the real you, your quirks, your fears, your dreams, your hopes, your failures, the first time you scraped your knee, your first kiss, your first anything.
Also commitmentphobes burn bright red hot, they just feel all of their feelings in a matter of seconds which is one reason why they can profess their love so fast but they burn out even faster and the whole situationship becomes one of those out of sight out of mind situations.
Commitmentphobic men RUN, they run and they run and they run. They tend to show a woman the VERY best side of themselves in the beginning and they just turn and run away, while she's stuck in love all by herself because what woman doesn't want to nest and build a life with a PERFECT MAN, she's so blinded by this PERFECT MAN persona that she's ignore the fact that she's being ignored, treated with apathy, can't be bothered until it's convenient for him to be bothered type of situation, she completely IGNORE the fact that she's being neglected mentally and emotionally all for the illusion of what she believes the relationship could be if he didn't have that darn pesky thing called commitmentphobia. She ends up loving a man that is only in love with himself and in love with his freedom MORE than her. Be careful!
http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/why-theres-no-point-being-with-somebody-who-blows-hot-cold/
First I recommend you LEARN (google if necessary) everything you can about the ambivalent man, then learn everything you can about the commitmentphobic man, then learn everything you can about the passive aggressive man before you decide that you're in love with him because what you'll notice is you're ALL ALONE in this loving him situation, all in love by YOURSELF which is a very weak and painful position to be stuck in and you will have to do the emotional work to get unstuck. Be careful.
Google: the ambivalent man
Google: the emotionally ambivalent man
Google: Commitphobic man--Tigress calls them Dream Chasers
http://commitment-phobia.com/signs_of_a_commitment_phobic_man.html
"(both times, I went to meet him). Before our first meeting, he confessed his love for me, and instantly I said I said I loved him, too"
I might nitpick this situation...
When meeting a man allow him to put in some of the leg work because the more work ie his time, his money, his energy he applies to a relationship the MORE mental and emotional investment he'll have towards you.
Screeeeeeeeeeeeeech those brakes. He's a stranger. You're a stranger. He does not love you. He does not know the REAL you, not the online you but the real you, your quirks, your fears, your dreams, your hopes, your failures, the first time you scraped your knee, your first kiss, your first anything.
Also commitmentphobes burn bright red hot, they just feel all of their feelings in a matter of seconds which is one reason why they can profess their love so fast but they burn out even faster and the whole situationship becomes one of those out of sight out of mind situations.
Commitmentphobic men RUN, they run and they run and they run. They tend to show a woman the VERY best side of themselves in the beginning and they just turn and run away, while she's stuck in love all by herself because what woman doesn't want to nest and build a life with a PERFECT MAN, she's so blinded by this PERFECT MAN persona that she's ignore the fact that she's being ignored, treated with apathy, can't be bothered until it's convenient for him to be bothered type of situation, she completely IGNORE the fact that she's being neglected mentally and emotionally all for the illusion of what she believes the relationship could be if he didn't have that darn pesky thing called commitmentphobia. She ends up loving a man that is only in love with himself and in love with his freedom MORE than her. Be careful!
http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/why-theres-no-point-being-with-somebody-who-blows-hot-cold/
First I recommend you LEARN (google if necessary) everything you can about the ambivalent man, then learn everything you can about the commitmentphobic man, then learn everything you can about the passive aggressive man before you decide that you're in love with him because what you'll notice is you're ALL ALONE in this loving him situation, all in love by YOURSELF which is a very weak and painful position to be stuck in and you will have to do the emotional work to get unstuck. Be careful.
Google: the ambivalent man
Google: the emotionally ambivalent man
Google: Commitphobic man--Tigress calls them Dream Chasers
http://commitment-phobia.com/signs_of_a_commitment_phobic_man.html
"Since the next day, it's been hot-and-cold cycles!"
This will be the cycle that will endure FOREVER, this will not end. Can you live with that understanding?
“Plus, we've fought several times, both of us are too stubborn, yet we keep coming back.”
You will never win. You will never beat the commitmentphobia. You will always lose and be on the losing end of the situationship. I call it situationship because the relationship will never progress because in order for the relationship to move forward there has to be fluidity and consistency and with a CP man he’s always disappearing and returning over and over again thus the relationship never expands and matures, his hot cold in and out behavior keeps the relationship stalled and forever in it’s infancy/beginning stage as if you’ve just met one another and this pattern endures over and over and over again.
“When I meet him personally, he's so different, all loving and the kind of romantic I'll always want - soft, gentlemanly, but not too flirty, poetic (both of us are poets), but when I try to contact him through texts, he hardly ever responds (though initially he'd text me day and night, not anymore). He doesn't answer calls. But for some reason, somehow I feel some sort of connection.
Read the above statement again and again until you acknowledge and grasp what’s happening to you. This CP dance is what goes on forever if you allow it to. He will make you feel you’ve met the PERFECT MAN and while you’re falling in love, he’s finding REASONS not to fall in love with you, so he’ll ignore you, he’ll be apathetic towards you, he’ll disappear and reappear, he’ll always be out of touch and out of reach but then he’ll pull you back in with the that PERFECT MAN persona/illusion that he’s so skillfully created, he will not want to be that PERFECT MAN PERSONA he’s created 24/7 with you, it’s exhausting and plus he has OTHER WOMEN to deal with so he must SAVE his energy. The connection feels real but it’s all just an illusion that makes the women feel it’s real but he feels NOTHING, you’ll see, eventually. The charm is used to CAPTURE women but not keep them.
“The problem is that whenever I bring up the commitment talk, he says he's confused”
Yes he’s confused. He truly can’t see how his lack of boundaries and elusive illusion behavior has emotionally captured another woman that he can’t, won’t, refuse to love. He’s wondering why you can fall for him but he can’t fall for you, he can manipulate the situation to create a space for a woman to love him but that’s where it stops.
Once you understand the PERFECT MAN persona is an illusion that is used to CAPTURE women and that it’s not meant to KEEP the women and that you really don’t know who this man is, you know this feeling he’s made you feel and that feeling feels absolutely real.
This will be the cycle that will endure FOREVER, this will not end. Can you live with that understanding?
“Plus, we've fought several times, both of us are too stubborn, yet we keep coming back.”
You will never win. You will never beat the commitmentphobia. You will always lose and be on the losing end of the situationship. I call it situationship because the relationship will never progress because in order for the relationship to move forward there has to be fluidity and consistency and with a CP man he’s always disappearing and returning over and over again thus the relationship never expands and matures, his hot cold in and out behavior keeps the relationship stalled and forever in it’s infancy/beginning stage as if you’ve just met one another and this pattern endures over and over and over again.
“When I meet him personally, he's so different, all loving and the kind of romantic I'll always want - soft, gentlemanly, but not too flirty, poetic (both of us are poets), but when I try to contact him through texts, he hardly ever responds (though initially he'd text me day and night, not anymore). He doesn't answer calls. But for some reason, somehow I feel some sort of connection.
Read the above statement again and again until you acknowledge and grasp what’s happening to you. This CP dance is what goes on forever if you allow it to. He will make you feel you’ve met the PERFECT MAN and while you’re falling in love, he’s finding REASONS not to fall in love with you, so he’ll ignore you, he’ll be apathetic towards you, he’ll disappear and reappear, he’ll always be out of touch and out of reach but then he’ll pull you back in with the that PERFECT MAN persona/illusion that he’s so skillfully created, he will not want to be that PERFECT MAN PERSONA he’s created 24/7 with you, it’s exhausting and plus he has OTHER WOMEN to deal with so he must SAVE his energy. The connection feels real but it’s all just an illusion that makes the women feel it’s real but he feels NOTHING, you’ll see, eventually. The charm is used to CAPTURE women but not keep them.
“The problem is that whenever I bring up the commitment talk, he says he's confused”
Yes he’s confused. He truly can’t see how his lack of boundaries and elusive illusion behavior has emotionally captured another woman that he can’t, won’t, refuse to love. He’s wondering why you can fall for him but he can’t fall for you, he can manipulate the situation to create a space for a woman to love him but that’s where it stops.
Once you understand the PERFECT MAN persona is an illusion that is used to CAPTURE women and that it’s not meant to KEEP the women and that you really don’t know who this man is, you know this feeling he’s made you feel and that feeling feels absolutely real.
You know that he’s given off the illusion of perfection and you’ve taken that at face value, the man seems real, feels real, smells real but if you’re absolutely honest with yourself, you don’t know him and he doesn’t know you and the kicker is he KNOW that you don’t know him, he’s fully aware that you are in love with the ILLUSION he’s created so there is a level of resentment and contempt that you fell for a man that is an emotional fraud, you fell for an illusion, you fell head long into loving a man via appearance and face value and honestly CP men don’t want naïve immature stupid women that take a man at face value, especially a Capricorn man. Some CP men will punish a woman for being gullible and naïve by using her at HIS convenience.
“The first time I met him, I asked "you'll never leave me, will you? When will you tell your parents?" and he replied, "no, I'll never leave you. I'll tell my parents after my submission." He recently finished his submission, but some time in the middle, he also said "I'm a commitment phobe"!”
He dumps you every time he ignores your text, he dumps you every time he doesn’t answer your calls.
With the CP man he’s in constant DUMPING mode. But they can be very small dumping methods like dropping her hand, dropping calls and not calling back, not answering calls for days, weeks even, ignore text messages, not answering questions, being super vague with answers and all of those little dumps eventually will make a woman feel insecure and dumped.
“Now after a lot of hot-and-cold cycles and fights, we're just having some casual chat, but I still feel some kind of strong connection that I've never felt before. And even after all this, I feel he loves me but he just does NOT open up! Where is all this going? Mixed signals”
You see there are women that go solely by connection and those women that place connection above all else are the ones that CP men go for because those women will put up with the unnecessary BS, they dumping and ignoring and ostracizing behavior, she’ll tolerate the pain just to maintain the connection and he’s not just doing this with you, he’s this way with every woman he comes into contact with old contacts and new contacts.
“The first time I met him, I asked "you'll never leave me, will you? When will you tell your parents?" and he replied, "no, I'll never leave you. I'll tell my parents after my submission." He recently finished his submission, but some time in the middle, he also said "I'm a commitment phobe"!”
He dumps you every time he ignores your text, he dumps you every time he doesn’t answer your calls.
With the CP man he’s in constant DUMPING mode. But they can be very small dumping methods like dropping her hand, dropping calls and not calling back, not answering calls for days, weeks even, ignore text messages, not answering questions, being super vague with answers and all of those little dumps eventually will make a woman feel insecure and dumped.
“Now after a lot of hot-and-cold cycles and fights, we're just having some casual chat, but I still feel some kind of strong connection that I've never felt before. And even after all this, I feel he loves me but he just does NOT open up! Where is all this going? Mixed signals”
You see there are women that go solely by connection and those women that place connection above all else are the ones that CP men go for because those women will put up with the unnecessary BS, they dumping and ignoring and ostracizing behavior, she’ll tolerate the pain just to maintain the connection and he’s not just doing this with you, he’s this way with every woman he comes into contact with old contacts and new contacts.
“He doesn't open up, or opens up very rarely to say a few sweet words and then disappear; he has said that he's a commitment phobe, plus we know nothing about each other's past; this is sort of an LDR. I'm confused! Should I continue to be patient or am I trusting someone who may not commit? (Right now, we're having only casual talk, but this is part of the cycle!) Help, please? What should I do?”
CP men 100% go for LDR, he can drop you without consequence, he can come in and out of your life without consequence, he can play the Mr. Perfect Man with multiple women without consequence and consequently he can go appear as if he’s never relationship needy because he’s moving through multiple women daily, hourly, weekly so he never appears as if he needs a woman and he doesn’t ever need any one particular woman as long as he’s able to rotate through as many women as he possibly can.
What you should do? Is learn as much as you can and then SAVE yourself from the impending heartache and emotional pain you’ll endure from holding onto a connection that you’re the only one feeling because believe If the feeling was mutual he wouldn’t be able to allow you to go so easily. He wouldn’t blow hot and cold if he too was enraptured over the connection that’s been created between the 2 of you.
Get out while you can. I can guarantee you that it’ll take you damn near a year to extricate the illusion of love and a connection he’s fed you. It’s not worth it. If you get out now you won’t turn bitter.
A little advice when it comes to online dating, be very conscious about LDR type of men, they usually make for the worst lovers. Stick with someone closer to you, someone close to you will not have the ability to emotionally con you by getting into your head for months before you meet, establishing a fake connection and dragging you along for years. At least if he’s in the same state you can meet after a few conversations and decide to move on without anyone losing time, effort, money, energy in the process
If you choose to remain in this CP situation just know that you will be the only one that will be in love ALONE, all by yourself and you will go through a lot of emotional and mental torment over his phobia and you will feel neglected throughout the connection you share with him and it will take you forever to get over The Perfect Man that loves himself more and chooses his phobia over you. It can take months, if not years to get over this kind of man because he's PERFECT, the connection is PERFECT, it's just that pesky phobia that's in your way and that will HAUNT you forever if you let it, it can get that bad.
CP men 100% go for LDR, he can drop you without consequence, he can come in and out of your life without consequence, he can play the Mr. Perfect Man with multiple women without consequence and consequently he can go appear as if he’s never relationship needy because he’s moving through multiple women daily, hourly, weekly so he never appears as if he needs a woman and he doesn’t ever need any one particular woman as long as he’s able to rotate through as many women as he possibly can.
What you should do? Is learn as much as you can and then SAVE yourself from the impending heartache and emotional pain you’ll endure from holding onto a connection that you’re the only one feeling because believe If the feeling was mutual he wouldn’t be able to allow you to go so easily. He wouldn’t blow hot and cold if he too was enraptured over the connection that’s been created between the 2 of you.
Get out while you can. I can guarantee you that it’ll take you damn near a year to extricate the illusion of love and a connection he’s fed you. It’s not worth it. If you get out now you won’t turn bitter.
A little advice when it comes to online dating, be very conscious about LDR type of men, they usually make for the worst lovers. Stick with someone closer to you, someone close to you will not have the ability to emotionally con you by getting into your head for months before you meet, establishing a fake connection and dragging you along for years. At least if he’s in the same state you can meet after a few conversations and decide to move on without anyone losing time, effort, money, energy in the process
If you choose to remain in this CP situation just know that you will be the only one that will be in love ALONE, all by yourself and you will go through a lot of emotional and mental torment over his phobia and you will feel neglected throughout the connection you share with him and it will take you forever to get over The Perfect Man that loves himself more and chooses his phobia over you. It can take months, if not years to get over this kind of man because he's PERFECT, the connection is PERFECT, it's just that pesky phobia that's in your way and that will HAUNT you forever if you let it, it can get that bad.
You said
And as I pushed him, he happily (not unwillingly) admitted that he loved me.Me thinks that is what happened. Do not push. He may have sounded happy but the next day he pushed his horns up a little.. Yes I'm a Leo but my moon is in Capricorn and I do this when I feel something is a bit forced. It has happened to me once or twice from other fire signs. He will become guarded if it continues.
Nevermind I just read more.. Guess it's too late.
Posted by CAPLOCK^^^^This. He's not serious about you Leo. Do yourself a favor and move on.
He's messing with your head and playing games. Using your attention to boost his ego. The "I'm busy" while having time to drink update social media is an excuse for men who aren't ready to committ.
Sometimes when you like someone, psychologically you'll ignore the truth that somethings wrong ....even when you know its wrong. That's why they say love is blind. Its like your walking with a cane because you don't even know whats ahead and if you're not careful you stumble.
People say love is a risk and you must take a leap.
I say F@ck that shit. Im not leaping no where if i don't know where im landing. I might land and break my funny bone.
BTW, fuck his little corny ass poems.
Roses are red, violets are blue,
I would leave if I were you.
Posted by ForeverlovemeOh! OK. Thank you, dear. Now I'm confused if he was ever really serious about the whole thing... But I'll remember what you said.
I don't like drama either & will avoid it. Sometimes I argue when I feel that's the only option.
I personally think you should go with the incompatibilities. & leave him alone & find someone more your speed.
If a Cap is genuinely with you, then no they most likely won't leave die to cultural differences later because they wouldn't have gotten serious with you in the 1st place.
Posted by Jalent99OK...Posted by InLoveWithLifeDepends from how much I like the person, but if its a repetition of drama I will avoid and run....Posted by Jalent99That's what I remember reading about Caps in general, too. So what does all this mean? Is this his way of slowly ending the relationship?
As a Cap I really dont like dramas......will avoid them at all costclick to expand
Posted by Jalent99He'd posted that on his blog. Alright. So he's pissed off? OK. I will leave him alone and not contact him at all.
And I wont outrightly post sarcasm on the blog of someone I like. Caps are all about pride and would not put someone down like that....seems like he is pissed/had enough and made up his mind given his actions.....
And Caps rarely change their mind
Posted by ParisianCappyOkay!
i like drama only if there'll rough sex after
Posted by tiki33Alright! It's just that I've never dealt with someone so reserved before. I can't put up with all this; I was holding on only because I had a feeling that I was impatient. Not anymore. Thank you for your response.
You know that he’s given off the illusion of perfection and you’ve taken that at face value, the man seems real, feels real, smells real but if you’re absolutely honest with yourself, you don’t know him and he doesn’t know you and the kicker is he KNOW that you don’t know him, he’s fully aware that you are in love with the ILLUSION he’s created so there is a level of resentment and contempt that you fell for a man that is an emotional fraud, you fell for an illusion, you fell head long into loving a man via appearance and face value and honestly CP men don’t want naïve immature stupid women that take a man at face value, especially a Capricorn man. Some CP men will punish a woman for being gullible and naïve by using her at HIS convenience.
“The first time I met him, I asked "you'll never leave me, will you? When will you tell your parents?" and he replied, "no, I'll never leave you. I'll tell my parents after my submission." He recently finished his submission, but some time in the middle, he also said "I'm a commitment phobe"!”
He dumps you every time he ignores your text, he dumps you every time he doesn’t answer your calls.
With the CP man he’s in constant DUMPING mode. But they can be very small dumping methods like dropping her hand, dropping calls and not calling back, not answering calls for days, weeks even, ignore text messages, not answering questions, being super vague with answers and all of those little dumps eventually will make a woman feel insecure and dumped.
“Now after a lot of hot-and-cold cycles and fights, we're just having some casual chat, but I still feel some kind of strong connection that I've never felt before. And even after all this, I feel he loves me but he just does NOT open up! Where is all this going? Mixed signals”
You see there are women that go solely by connection and those women that place connection above all else are the ones that CP men go for because those women will put up with the unnecessary BS, they dumping and ignoring and ostracizing behavior, she’ll tolerate the pain just to maintain the connection and he’s not just doing this with you, he’s this way with every woman he comes into contact with old contacts and new contacts.
Posted by leowwwThanks, dear!
@InLoveWithLife he told you you're not compatible— Explains his attitude. Leave him girl. Don't force it. Just let him go. He hasn't contacted you while you have plenty. Too much. Up to you but I wouldn't wait for the nail in the coffin.
Posted by tiki33Thank you, dear. It is just that I did not want to assume that he was a jerk and make decisions based on such assumptions! Well, I'll just leave. If at all he ever really loved me, let him come back and commit. Or it is all over. I'm done!
“He doesn't open up, or opens up very rarely to say a few sweet words and then disappear; he has said that he's a commitment phobe, plus we know nothing about each other's past; this is sort of an LDR. I'm confused! Should I continue to be patient or am I trusting someone who may not commit? (Right now, we're having only casual talk, but this is part of the cycle!) Help, please? What should I do?”
CP men 100% go for LDR, he can drop you without consequence, he can come in and out of your life without consequence, he can play the Mr. Perfect Man with multiple women without consequence and consequently he can go appear as if he’s never relationship needy because he’s moving through multiple women daily, hourly, weekly so he never appears as if he needs a woman and he doesn’t ever need any one particular woman as long as he’s able to rotate through as many women as he possibly can.
What you should do? Is learn as much as you can and then SAVE yourself from the impending heartache and emotional pain you’ll endure from holding onto a connection that you’re the only one feeling because believe If the feeling was mutual he wouldn’t be able to allow you to go so easily. He wouldn’t blow hot and cold if he too was enraptured over the connection that’s been created between the 2 of you.
Get out while you can. I can guarantee you that it’ll take you damn near a year to extricate the illusion of love and a connection he’s fed you. It’s not worth it. If you get out now you won’t turn bitter.
A little advice when it comes to online dating, be very conscious about LDR type of men, they usually make for the worst lovers. Stick with someone closer to you, someone close to you will not have the ability to emotionally con you by getting into your head for months before you meet, establishing a fake connection and dragging you along for years. At least if he’s in the same state you can meet after a few conversations and decide to move on without anyone losing time, effort, money, energy in the process
If you choose to remain in this CP situation just know that you will be the only one that will be in love ALONE, all by yourself and you will go through a lot of emotional and mental torment over his phobia and you will feel neglected throughout the connection you share with him and it will take you forever to get over The Perfect Man that loves himself more and chooses his phobia over you. It can take months, if not years to get over this kind of man because he's PERFECT, the connection is PERFECT, it's just that pesky phobia that's in your way and that will HAUNT you forever if you let it, it can get that bad.
Posted by GreenteaYep! You're right again, Caplock! That fellow was messing my head up. It's just that I haven't dealt with such a reserved guy before. He's quite reserved and never discusses anything personal or emotional even on social media. I was waiting, putting up, and dealing with all this nonsense only because I didn't want to make the mistake of hurting someone with genuine intentions!Posted by CAPLOCK^^^^This. He's not serious about you Leo. Do yourself a favor and move on.
He's messing with your head and playing games. Using your attention to boost his ego. The "I'm busy" while having time to drink update social media is an excuse for men who aren't ready to committ.
Sometimes when you like someone, psychologically you'll ignore the truth that somethings wrong ....even when you know its wrong. That's why they say love is blind. Its like your walking with a cane because you don't even know whats ahead and if you're not careful you stumble.
People say love is a risk and you must take a leap.
I say F@ck that shit. Im not leaping no where if i don't know where im landing. I might land and break my funny bone.
BTW, fuck his little corny ass poems.
Roses are red, violets are blue,
I would leave if I were you.
click to expand
Now that enough of you Cap guys have said that this fellow is worth a poetic goodbye and nothing more, sure! Will quote your two-liner, Caplock! 😉
Thanks a lot for helping me see things through, guys! 🙂
Posted by InLoveWithLifeYes sorry dear, give him spacePosted by Jalent99He'd posted that on his blog. Alright. So he's pissed off? OK. I will leave him alone and not contact him at all.
And I wont outrightly post sarcasm on the blog of someone I like. Caps are all about pride and would not put someone down like that....seems like he is pissed/had enough and made up his mind given his actions.....
And Caps rarely change their mindclick to expand
Posted by CAPLOCKOhkay! You're right about his messing my head up. I was sticking on with all this only because I didn't want to hurt someone genuine. But while I step out and look at things, you're right! I felt the same way, that the little 'hero' wanted my attention to just boost the most-of-the-time-down ego! Enough! I've done my bit of social service by responding to that brat's texts and stuff.
He's messing with your head and playing games. Using your attention to boost his ego. The "I'm busy" while having time to drink update social media is an excuse for men who aren't ready to committ.
Sometimes when you like someone, psychologically you'll ignore the truth that somethings wrong ....even when you know its wrong. That's why they say love is blind. Its like your walking with a cane because you don't even know whats ahead and if you're not careful you stumble.
People say love is a risk and you must take a leap.
I say F@ck that shit. Im not leaping no where if i don't know where im landing. I might land and break my funny bone.
BTW, fuck his little corny ass poems.
Roses are red, violets are blue,
I would leave if I were you.
Now it's time I pack up and leave! Thanks a ton, Caplock! 🙂
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