Advice needed on a FWB relationship with a Gemini

So I'm a Virgo man and was in a "friends with benefits" relationship with a younger Gemini woman who has now told me she just wants us to be friends....no more "benefits." So I am simply trying to see what I can do to get us back to where we were.

We have only known each other about 4 months. We didn't have sex too quickly (nor did we take too long either). But once we did start we had a lot of it. And it was great...better than most women I have been with. She told me often how great it was for her too...and without going into a lot of detail, I am sure she was sincere (not trying to boast or anything....just being honest and brief).

While she was away on a trip recently she would text me about how much she missed me and how much she fantasized about our sex (which of course I liked and said the same back). Though when she got back she distanced herself from me...which she had done before. So never really thought about it...I always just gave her her space. She told me from the beginning that she doesn't want a boyfriend and I accepted that. Though she also told me that she was falling in love with me and that she should probably run from me. But this last time, about 2 weeks ago, she was really drunk, and told me she didn't want to see me anymore because I was getting too serious.

Here are the bullet points (faster and easier to read maybe):

- I have always given her her space, but she has the impression that I am trying to be her boyfriend since I "pamper" her when she comes to my place. I do. But I do that because I want her to be happy and feel comfortable.

- 9 out of 10 times she contacts me first in the day. And I always reply (i.e. I don't play games and ignore her for a while). I never call her...she calls me. Not that I don't want to...it's just that I figure if she wants to see or talk she'll contact me, and she does.

- Even after telling me she just wants to be friends, we still talk or text everyday and hang out a lot...but of course no sex. I get a hug goodbye and sometimes a kiss on the lips.

- I think that she's met another guy. Can't really say anything because she's always had that freedom to do so. She just seemed so into me, with all that she said and as much time as we spent together, that I am a bit surprised. And I hate the thought of her with another guy...but I can't be mad at her about it.

So my question is what, if anything, can I do to get us back to being FWB? Any ideas on ho

So my question is what, if anything, can I do to get us back to being FWB? Any ideas on how to spark that again? For me, with any girl I have sex with, it's not about me getting off, I have to have a connection with the girl...and I just really love the connection this girl and I have.

Also, should I express to her how I feel? Or just play it cool....and see where things go?

(I realize, as I write all this out...in a forum....that I am going to a lot of effort for just a FWB relationship. Yeah...I probably do want something more...but for now just want to see what you guys think based on the above)

I think you should tell her! It sounds like you really like her, not just the sex part. She maybe had feelings too and that's why she's pulling away. Maybe there is another guy, maybe its just to distract her from you. you'll never know until you try.

I dunno if you should really pour you're soul out to her..don't be too heavy it might scare her away. But tell her honestly how you feel and what you want. Good luck 🙂

Do you know the rest of her chart?

Do you guys ever go out or just to each other's place?

Yeah...I don't think I'd "pour my heart out to her", I agree...but maybe just say something as simple as I miss what we had....and miss the affection. I do really like her...and more than just for sex. Based on all the things she said to me, I'd like to think that, yeah, she did start to have strong feelings for me (I mean can't get much deeper than "I am falling in love with you..") and that because of those feelings she's running away...she pretty much said that's what she's doing.

I don't know the rest of her chart. Though I will say that from everything that I have read online about Gemini women she seems very typical.

Since the "break up"...we just hang out at my place. One night we did go out to after hours though, but then I just drove her home (she made a comment about seeing how sad I looked that I was just dropping her off at my place...later she texted that she should have just stayed at my place). But I haven't actually taken her out on a date....and she even pointed that out. Not that I never wanted to...it was always just not know what her schedule would be like...so it was hard to nail her down and plan a date. But was thinking I would like to ask her out on an official "date"....I just don't want to look like I'm trying too hard, you know?

Thank you for your input ladies! Really appreciate it 🙂

* I mean dropping her off at her place

Whats her bday? That's how you figure or the rest of the chart. Just curious is all


I've done similar things when I was into someone but trying not to get too into them you know. Trying to distract with other people. Of course, we are just assuming there's someone else right? You don't know that for sure. And I don't think you should ask either. That might turn into an argument.

Ask her out for a drink or coffee. Maybe dinner if you want, but just tell her you wanna talk and/or see her. Not full blown fancy date, nice and casual. But still, taking a fwb in public is kinda like the next step. Haha it's weird but I started as fwb and I've been with him for a year now. It does happen

What's your b day for extra shits and giggles? I bet you have a water moon 😛

If you don't wanna be that personal you can look it up yourself at cafeastrology.com

I wouldn't mind sharing it with you....but I just ran it myself...thank you though! Here are some of the readings....funny...seem pretty spot on...

50 Sextile Mars - Pluto

Positive aspect: Enormous physical passion. The sexual attraction is intense and insistent. They want to be around each other as much as possible. Their sexual relationship evolves with time, instead of dissolves.

43 Sextile Venus - Neptune

Positive aspect: Favorable union, they have the same artistic tastes in common, their life will sometimes be full of fantasy.

-107 Square Mercury - Mars

Challenging aspect: They can interrupt each other often. Problems can arise when one or the other finds their partner too blunt or too critical. When involved in a conversation, they can compete for the microphone. Conversations can be very lively, but may often escalate into arguments.

We do interrupt each other often...and what bugs me is I don't say anything when she does it to me, but watch out if I do it to her. It's pretty much been the only thing we ever argue about. And the only reason I even "argue" is because she's getting so mad at me for something she herself does to me all the time.

How do I know if I have a water moon?

Run you birth charts separately instead of the compatibility chart.

It sounds like you are probably coming off a little too weak for her, being so into her. I would back off and not tell her anything. In fact I would start dating other people and if she wants to be friends let her know no more lip kisses etc. I would just act like a friend to her but not be there 50% of the time when she calls or texts, don't answer, have your own life and wait for her to come back. When a gemini likes you they definitely come back. It sounds like she is chasing someone else at the moment but is keeping you hanging on a string, either that or she really wants to be with you and is testing you because she wants more than FWB.

I have thought that....that I am way too available for her. I think you're right. I can see that a lot of people seem to come and go in her life and it doesn't really faze her (it's so easy for her to find new and interesting people, so why care if someone opts out?), so my rationale has been why don't I be someone who's not going to just bail out on her. Which can either work in my favor....or get me taken advantage of...or maybe a little of both.

The thing is I am a nice guy that would do anything for any of my friends...not just her. So it's hard for me to say no to her. I think she does really still like me...but just doesn't want to. Her head and heart seem conflicted.

I'll for sure date others now...this girl isn't stopping me. It was more the mixed messages that this girl was sending that got me here.

Thanks GS 🙂

virgo415, with all due respect, the reason this girl is conflicted is because you both have gone down the wrong path in terms of developing a relationship.

I'll admit it, I'm older than you and grew up with the notion that when you want to get to know someone from the opposite sex, you take your time. You get to know them first as a person. You see what they like what they don't like. You have fun together on dates as going to a movie or a restaurant. You actually get to know "her" for "her" and develop the "emotional" connection first. If that is developed, then the other connections, as physical can be developed.

It's not just about her being a Gemini and you being a Virgo. It's about building the foundation for a long term, healthy and real connection that's more than based on a sexual connection. Trust me, I've been happily married for 17 years. The first thing that is challenged during a long term relationship is the physical aspect. You both work. Then there's the kids. And life is a real challenge. Physical connection and intimacy is vital to a healthy relationship. But you won't maintain that without developing the "emotional" attraction and connection first.

The other thing in play is this. When women experience sex with a man, they get a huge release of Oxytocin. This is the hormone that is released that gives people that "connection" feeling, the feeling of love. Dopamine is released and this brings about the feeling of being "high" and in utter bliss. Combine these two for a woman without that strong developed emotional connection first, and she will be conflicted.

A man can have sex with a woman and not become emotionally attached. For women, that is not the case. So by having sex within 4 months, her body is telling her one thing. Her heart is telling her another. And she's deeply conflicted.

Honestly, the way relationships are designed is for the man to chase the woman. It's been that way since the dawn of time. Men are wired to hunt, women to nurture. Once you change that design, roles become confused. And anyone who is being chased too much will withdraw. It's human nature. If you pull back and let her live her life, maybe in time she can figure out what her feelings are and if she will be able to see you more than a FWB's. The more you try to reel her in, the more she will pull away. Same thing goes for a woman trying to reel in a man. It's the rubber band effect; the law of attraction.

Thank you Gemini64...I appreciate your thoughtful response.

Though if you were born in '64...you're not that much older than me. But you are right that we didn't start off as perhaps a typical healthy relationship might start. Though I was engaged to a woman who I was with for 7 years, who I slept with on our first date.

I've actually never had a FWB relationship before. I think I'm atypical of most guys in that I like building up an emotional connection first...I did that with this girl for the most part. We didn't have sex right away. I like building up a little sexual tension.

The bottom line is this girl told me before we even hooked up that she doesn't do relationships...she doesn't want a bf. So it's not like I wasn't warned, and I never tried to be her bf, at least consciously. But her actions and a lot of other things she said contradicted that....I just started to think that I must be THAT GOOD! Haha....totally kidding. But seriously though...I liked all the compliments and the sweet texts and the fact that she missed me so much...that's what I miss too. I feel like I just went "with the flow", but still always kept in mind that this girl doesn't want a relationship. I liked doing things to help her and make her happy (something that I am reading on here that some Virgos do)...made me happy to make her happy and comfortable. Even though she said she loves coming to my house because I take care of her here...she took that as me trying to be her bf. I told her that wasn't the case at all.

Anyway...thank you again for your thoughts 🙂

Well things took a horrible turn today...beyond my worst nightmare. I have been taking care of her cat because she was travelling. And since she's been back, I have still been taking care of it 1. because she would have another reason to come over and see me and 2. I like the cat. Not sure why she left the cat here so long after she got back...but she did.

But today she texted me that she's depressed and asked if I would bring her cat back to her. I said OK. She had a special carrier bag for the cat here. So I loaded up the litter box and bowls, and the bag. Then got the cat into the car and into the bag. The cat hated the bag....understandably. On the way to her I stopped at the grocery store to get her litter for the cat since she was out, and was going to get her some other things she likes to help cheer her up. I realized that I can't leave the cat in the car...it was over 100 degrees out today. So had to take the cat inside with me, in the bag (right?)

So I put the carrier bag with the cat in the shopping cart and just as we were about to enter the store he wiggled out of the bag and tarted out into the parking lot (I am 100% sure the bag was completely zipped up because he tried getting out in the car and I had to pull over to get him back in and realized that I have to zip the bag totally shut). I chased after him but he was moving under parked cars. I quickly lost track of him. There is a huge empty dirt lot (acres) next to the store, covered in bushes (and tons of trash and broken glass). So I just started frantically looking everywhere for him.

I was wearing flip flops and one of them broke in the rough terrain I was walking around in. So just had to go barefoot in the rocks and glass and hot asphalt. I told everyone I saw to keep an eye out for him. Offered $ 100 reward to any of the lot attendants and a few homeless guys that were around. She called me wondering where I was and I had to tell her. She freaked out. Screaming at me. Said if I don't find her cat she's going to kill herself and that she hates me.

Somehow she got a ride there to where I was (she doesn't have a car right now) and she looked. But not with me. She wouldn't come near me. We looked for hours. I almost passed out from dehydration and my bare foot was in a lot of pain...as were my knees. I didn't even want to stop to go into the store to get water, but eventually had to. As it got darker, she texted me and asked if I could give

....As it got darker, she texted me and asked if I could give her a ride home. I said yes. The whole ride home we didn't speak. I knew she didn't want to hear excuses from me...or probably not even my voice. At her place, she took the cat stuff and shut the door without a word. I did say that I am going to make flyers and go back.

And that's what I did. Made them at kinkos and posted about 50 fliers around the lot and strip mall. And went to surrounding complexes and homes with the fliers. It's 3 am now and just got back.

I feel so horrible. I am literally sick to my stomach. Obviously you guys see that I really care about this girl, but beyond that, I lost her cat, whom she loves more than anything. I keep replaying it over and over in my head. I had no idea that cat could get out of the bag. Once I zipped it up in the car it seemed like he couldn't. And obviously I couldn't leave the cat in the car. Though, I wish that I just left the engine running with the AC on and locked the doors.

I am going to go to the animal shelters in the morning with fliers. Someone suggested that I put out cat food around the area he took off, so I put out 10 cans of wet food. He has no front claws and no collar or tags...which only makes it that much worse.

I am just debating if I should send her an email or something right now? I know nothing I can say will cheer her up or fix this, short of finding her cat. But I want her to know how sorry I am and that I did and will do everything I can to get her cat back. And I will of course get her another cat...but that's not going to help. I feel like it's cold of me to not say anything....but at the same time I don't think she wants to hear from me.

I can't sleep now...so figured I'd post this event here.

C'mon, don't be such a Virgo. That was one of those days which is going to get stuck into your mind and make you laugh laud later on.

This is how I see your relationship, from the point of view of a woman who is not a Gemini, but mutable, and has had F-buddies in the past.

It's called FB for some reason. If she says she doesn't want a serious relationship, but none of you is moving town/country soon, there are two main reasons for it: she pins for someone else (a recent ex or someone she hopes to attract) or she doesn't consider you good enough to be her boyfriend. "Good enough" refers to her specific needs and does not mean at all you are not "good on paper". You are not her type, you lack something she wants or you have something she dislikes.

Of course, orgasms make women feel attached to the person providing them, even if she knows that this person is not "good enough" (or just a distraction from being with the man she really wants) and that is where her mixed signals are coming from.

Find her cat, give it to her and leave her alone.

I had a F-buddy falling for me, and it annoyed me, since he was a good fuck, but not "good enough" otherwise. He got dumped like as hot potato and I have no regrets.

Aww virgo! That's horrible 😢 you had good intentions, that's very obvious. But she's going to be mad no matter what you do until she decides on her own to get over it. You have done what you could, now I guess you gotta just leave it be.

The picture is starting to get a little clearer though. You are a very nice guy. Dare I say... too nice. She's gonna walk all over you and probably already does. Women will never really love a guy they can manipulate. Gemini or not :/

I'm sorry all that happened. And I'm sorry for what you must be feeling. But I think you should leave her alone. Move on

Being TOO nice is not a bad thing. I, for example, prefer nice guys. My Aqua ex bf was the nicest man I ever been with, and this is the reason why I miss him sometimes. I didn't walk all over him, I adored him.

The problem is Virgo415 hasn't found the right woman in that Gemini, although he appears to think so, despite the ridiculous situation.

Maybe it is the chasing instinct that keeps him going in the wrong direction. The "hard to get" woman may not be the great catch he think she is. Most often, it is what it is: a woman who is NOT interested. She may give in at his insistency, yet only half-assed, looking for an escape at the proximal occasion.

Also, unless she is sick, her depression and bad moods may suggest that she made some attempts to connect with another guy, yet not successfully.

Imagine her waiting for the new guy to call...the phone rings...her heart jumps with joy...but who is that?.....oh, not that loser again 😢!!! ...SMH!

Virgo415,

Wow, I'm sorry to hear about your day. That would be a very difficult scenario to go through, especially when you have strong feelings involved.

Here's the deal, and after reading my first post, you know that I mean well and it's coming from the heart.

First, not all gemini women are like this one. Most of us are caring, expressive and loyal. We go out of our way to do for others and we love sharing our lives with people who "get" us.

I realize you have feelings for her. I can empathize. I've had feelings for a guy who I couldn't have. He was emotionally unavailable. While he was taken, in some ways, so too is this girl you are dealing with.

While your heart is into her, her heart is not into you. It's very obvious. Ever heard the saying, "we get the treatment we deserve?" People learn how to relate by how they act and what they allow in return. You have bent over backwards for her. Taking care of her cat at your home, buying it food, going the extra mile to find it etc. speaks volumes about where your heart is. Now flip the page. She is taking advantage of you. And now she can add making you feel guilty to the list. This is not love. This is control.

It's great you are around my age because then you have lived a lot of life to see just about everything. You are being used. Pure and simple.

I'm not judging you regarding your FWB choice although it would never be my choice. Now you can see, however, that if you pursue this option, you are going to get stuck with negative aspects of what this type of relationship will bring. You can't have a long lasting relationship that is based on love, admiration, affection, and integrity with someone you desire ONLY for sex. When the sex fades, what do you have? NOTHING.

Drop her. The sooner the better. Move on with your life and go find a real woman who can appreciate you for who you are, treat you with respect and can love you for the qualities you bring. In turn, love yourself first and cherish your self respect.

I think she got tired of the same person.. Its not your fault nor is it hers...

So just thought I would add a follow up to my original post and an update on this girl since I last posted about losing her cat!

So after losing her cat on July 4th she pretty much didn't talk to me the entire month of July. Though despite that I made every effort to find her cat, to which he was never found. At the end of July, I can't recall why, we did start talking again. She also got a new dog (to which she even let me take care of while she went away for a 5 days! Funny. But I was more careful with that dog than anyone else would be I think...considering what happened with the cat. That's how much she trusts me).

So we hung out as friends, ate meals out, went to movies, just hung out as friends. Then around August 8th or so, we started having sex again. Though after the first few times we did, she kept telling me afterwards that she did not want to have a sexual relationship with me. I just said OK...didn't really discuss it much. But then we'd hang out as usual, and usually the way I would initiate sex with her, seduce her, was by starting with a massage. Honestly, I really like giving her massages and would tell myself not to try and turn it into sex, because it was never (usually never) my original intent to seduce her when giving her a massage. I honestly didn't want my massages to only be associated with me seducing her. But sometimes I just couldn't help myself, in the way that I would touch her....and it would turn into sex. But she was always more than willing. And then she stopped telling me she didn't want a sexual relationship with me.

So we started seeing each other again and in my opinion it was better than it was before. Had sex regularly, we never fought, we got along great. She usually initiated contact with me if we weren't together that day. She'd come stay at my house for 3-4 days. I think she really liked hanging out with me...especially because of how much I would pamper her when she'd stay at my house (massages, breakfast in bed, dinner by candles in the bathtub while watching her favorite tv shows etc...)So for about 2 months now all was good...or so I thought.

After spending the whole day with her this past Monday, even having sex, after we went out to dinner and had a nice time, I dropped her off at home. She texted me later that night and said that we should hang out less and she needs space and that she never wanted a sexual relationship with me and that she's not into me romantically. Said she was going to be very busy this month. Truth is I think she met another guy. I know who it is, she's told me about him, he's a co-worker.

What bothers me about that is it's been a long while since she ever said she didn't want a sexual relationship with me, and now she brings it up when she wants to end things with me? Like I some how forced her to have sex with me and hang out with me? I think she's doing that so she doesn't feel guilty for wanting to stop seeing me when things are good between us. I dunno...

So given her history with me...I wasn't entirely surprised by this. But was just so out of the blue and bothered me that she did it by text...when she could have talked to me face to face. And we would normally talk or text everyday without fail this past 2 months, now nothing since Monday night. I haven't sent her anything...I'm giving her her space.

So I know...I know....dump this girl and RUN! That advice aside for a minute. Just simply wondering if I should send her an email about how I am kinda hurt by this sudden "break up" in that I thought things were going well between us. I figured if I do sent an email I'd wait until early next week though.

All reasonable logic aside...should I email or text her if I don't hear from her? Or wait til I hear from her?

I'm sorry, but it sounds like she has serious issues. That or she's confused.

Virgo415, you sound like a really nice guy, and you've willingly set yourself up for emotional torture. Your arrangement with this girl is FWB. She is operating within the rules of that arrangement, but you are not. You are behaving as though you are dating. She hasn't met "another man", she's met "a man". She's looking for a partner, and your FWB relationship will, naturally, take a back seat to her romantic life. I don't think you're cut out for this arrangement. Perhaps you should start some dating of your own. It would do you both a world of good for you not to he at her beck and call all the time. I promise you that a Gem girl won't respect a guy that is so accommodating (unless she's already in love with him). She may care for you, but she won't respect you (and that means she won't date you).

I think she does have issues...AND is confused lol. I think you're right in that I did set myself up for emotional torture. I knew this day would come, but not as it did...so sudden, that's why it's bothering me a lot more than I thought it would. I thought I'd see it coming.

At one point she did say she was falling in love with me....so it had to be more than FWB at some point. I mean maybe I don't know the "rules" of a FWB relationship...but it sure felt like we were dating. Wasn't like she was seeing other guys (romantically), she would spend the night at my place days in a row. We saw each other almost everyday and if not talked everyday. Point is...for a while there seemed a lot more than FWB.

I just find it hard to believe (not that I am disagreeing with you) that if I am a nice guy who helps her out a lot when she needs it....that she'd lose respect for me. I mean you're probably right....it just doesn't make logical sense in my mind. And despite that...I'll always be that way....not going to change. Makes me happy to make her happy....though at the same time I do not let her walk all over me. I'm not that spineless...

But you guys are both right.

Still wondering if at any point I should reach out to her IF I don't hear from her. I just think it's weird, talking everyday with her....then for a week at least now...nothing. I did nothing wrong.

There is something that she is not getting from you and it has nothing to do with being a good guy. When she spoke about someone else what did she say or not say.

...and I don't think you did anything wrong.

She last texted me saying that she's in love with someone else and those feelings "have proven to not go away so easily." She told me this exact same thing last time we "broke up" about 4 months ago. My response to that, in an email that's been written, but probably won't send(?), is "you say that you're in love with someone else...OK. You've told me that before and not sure what the story with that is...none of my business. But I am the guy that's been there for you and it didn't stop you from being with me these past two months...why now?"

Her initial text to me bringing up the subject of not seeing each other anymore said that she is going to be busy this month and that I am a distraction. My response, in part was, how could I be a distraction when I am the one helping you get done (and pushing you to get done) the things you need and want to accomplish?. She then said it's not so much that I'm a distraction...but that she's in love with someone else. I think that other person lives in another state...but not sure. But she's not "seeing" him...I know that much as she's

As far as "not doing anything wrong" I mention that b/c last time we "broke up" we weren't getting a long perfectly. This time, these past two months, we got along great. Thanks for recognizing that though. But that's why I'm here...and confused...

Anyway...yeah...she's confused...has a lot going on in her mind...

Is sending her an email eventually (if we don't talk or I don't hear from her) a bad idea?

I'm not sure about the email thing, but I'll reiterate that being accommodating won't get you a Gemini woman. She's looking for someone that matches some ideal inside of her, and no amount of being nice will make you turn into that. It sucks, because you're doing your best to be a good guy. But, a good guy isn't always what a girl is looking for.

I could be wrong but it sounds like she is in an on/off relationship with someone.
I do think at some point she started to think of you in another way.
But the question is was she having feelings for you because she felt it genuinely or because she felt the other relationship was over and was going to try to move on.
It seems a part of her liked you but not enough to close the chapter on this other person.

No more benefits dude. It's obviously deeper than that to her; and with her being a Gem she's not about to tell you that again. She already told you once thar she was falling in love with you, if you didn't do anything about it, then she most likely assumed you weren't interested and is only interested in sex. I'm thinking that was her little way to tell you she wants more, without actually having to tell you because then she??d be going back on her own word. She's trying to maintain control of the situation it seems, and it's not going well because her emotions are all over the place. I'm sorry but lately I??ve caught nothing but these crazy, fun,sexy gems (no offense, gems.lol, but yall are nuts..perks of being an air sign I guess, sort of like me but not quite —wink) and they all seem to get a little distant and aloof or very protective and slightly demanding when they are falling for someone, almost like they are scared of what comes after they fall. In my opinion it's the commitment part that scares them the most. Mainly because when you commit to something or someone you are promising to see it through no matter what, which causes an air sign to be scared as heck. We are used to being able to come and go as we please, can't do that with commitment in the way. But then how do you stop the other person from dating other people?? You cannot!! LOL. See he problem now?

Seems like your gem is at stand still with herself. She's probably trying to figure it out on her own without bringing it up to you because she will seem crazy for not knowing exactly what it is that she wants. She enjoys the sex, you have a great time, she wants you for herself but she doesn't want to commit. She's trying to find the median here. The fact is feelings are involved now and it's clear as day on both ends whether you want to admit it or not. No more benefits until the two of you sit down and talk it out. Sex will only confuse things even more. Chill out and try talking to her, if she won't talk then you need to find a new sex buddy. A sex buddy is supposed to be just that, no feelings, no emotions and none of this —I hate to think of her with another man.?? Crap. That right there shows, this is going way past the fwb border line.

Posted by virgo415
She last texted me saying that she's in love with someone else and those feelings "have proven to not go away so easily." She told me this exact same thing last time we "broke up" about 4 months ago. My response to that, in an email that's been written, but probably won't send(?), is "you say that you're in love with someone else...OK. You've told me that before and not sure what the story with that is...none of my business. But I am the guy that's been there for you and it didn't stop you from being with me these past two months...why now?"

Her initial text to me bringing up the subject of not seeing each other anymore said that she is going to be busy this month and that I am a distraction. My response, in part was, how could I be a distraction when I am the one helping you get done (and pushing you to get done) the things you need and want to accomplish?. She then said it's not so much that I'm a distraction...but that she's in love with someone else. I think that other person lives in another state...but not sure. But she's not "seeing" him...I know that much as she's

As far as "not doing anything wrong" I mention that b/c last time we "broke up" we weren't getting a long perfectly. This time, these past two months, we got along great. Thanks for recognizing that though. But that's why I'm here...and confused...

Anyway...yeah...she's confused...has a lot going on in her mind...

Is sending her an email eventually (if we don't talk or I don't hear from her) a bad idea?

okay CLEARLY i missed this post.lol. Cut her off. She's in love with someone else, and her emotions are all over the place. This woman seems she doesn't know what she wants. Go find another fwb minus all the drama if thats what you want. Even if you want a relationship her situation is way to messy and it seems it was messy before you even came along, which means it will only get messier with you in the picture and she's knows that.

Thank you for all your thoughtful input...which all seems about right.

I'll check back in later with an update.....

It's been a week, Virgo! How's it going?

Geminis don't do emotions just like virgos don't do emotions. My brother is a Leo and he is obsessed with his ex gf that is a Gemini and she is doing the exact same thing to him the difference is he was in a relationship with her. This girl is avoiding her feelings for you by behaving immaturely. Oh and they like when guys put them in they place stop letting her walk all over you! Once again virgo you are being a service to her. I'm not sure what you feel for her is pure you trying to be a hero and save this girl from her confusing ways. It's a karmic cycle til you learn your lessons. Stop making the same mistakes if you want it to be different act different!