A whole month?

I'm reposting this in here since I'm a leo. I also have it posted in the libra forum.

I like this libra girl, and I've been pursuing her for a year now. Today I called her to get coffee and she said she would be busy for the rest of the month, but to call her in October. So, thats what I'm going to do. Now I have to figure out how to keep my mind off her until then. Any ideas?

Ideas on how to keep your mind off of her? I hope I read that correctly.

Join a gym and get some excercise? I dunno. I think that's what I would do if I really liked someone but knew I wouldn't see them for awhile. I'd take the time to work on looking good lol

hmm... Or, stay occupied by hanging out with other people. You've already waited a year, just keep doing what you've been doing.

A month is an awful long time to wait for coffee. Will she be out of the country? Have you made any progress over the course of a year with her as it is? More details?

Sometimes I think I've made progress, or not so much made progress, but done something that she liked somehow by accident. So it's sort off and on, but never goes farther than only hanging out with our mutual friends, which doesn't happen anymore since things have changed with our mutual friends, and plus when we hang out with them, we sort of compete for the center of attention and turn on each other, and the fact that she knows I like her doesn't make that any easier. I think if we hang out alone we'll each be the center of each others attention, but I don't know. I'm doing all those things you suggested purrrfect. I'm hella working out, looking for work, and hanging out with other people. I'm a struggling comic so I'm gonna go to comedy shows every night even if I can't perform. Should keep me busy.

Yeah, I think her making you wait one month for coffee says a lot. Maybe you should try backing off for awhile. See if she comes to you. So far it doesn't sound like she wants more from you.

Umm...I hope that sex isn't important to you...

A friggin month for a coffee...I think I'd just send her a postcard with a coffee-mug on it saying......"forget that coffee love! - find yourself some other mug!!! - Ciao".

Come on banani......use that intelligent brain of yours....if she was into you, there wouldn't be that long insulting wait.

Alana x

Hey guys, I know perfectly well if she was interested we would be getting coffee like Friday or Saturday, because I KNOW she's probably going to be busy until then. But, if October comes along and I still want to get coffee with her, I'm calling. She's not going to care if I say, "find yourself some other mug" unless she actually cares about me, so it's just gonna be coffee that one time unless she shows that she is, and thats assuming I can even get her interested in the coffee.

banini, the Libra is not interested. She is trying to let you down easy, as Librans are non-confrontational creatures. Unfortunately, you layed your cards on the table way too early and are starting to sound pathetic.

Your only chance of any type of relationship, even just a friendship, is to break off all contact. If she has any interest at all, it will be piqued as Libras love to have many admirers even if they have zero intention of becoming romantically involved.

She will probably give you a call in late October, if only to give false hope. That's when you invite her to coffee. If she agrees, slip a roofie in her drink and drop her in the basement pit (think Silence of the Lambs) that you have spent the past month painstakingly excavating.

That will give you a few days to wine and dine her until the authorities move in. Not exactly a fairy-tale romance, but at least you got the girl. Hopefully she will have fallen in love with your inner child and wait out your 5-7 year sentence. 😉

LOL Softcookie. I don't care if I have to be a banana in order to get her to get coffee with me once. After we've done it, she can either realize she was stupid because she could have had this a long time ago but just couldn't see it, and feel bad as a result, or, she'll keep playing games and try to see if I'll keep being a banana, and I don't think I will.

banini, I was halfway serious. She isn't interested in you romantically right now, she might even see your relentless pursuit as borderline psychotic. Save your dignity and give it a rest for awhile. And definitely don't call her in a month.

Get your life busy. And then when you have something more to talk about with her other than how infatuated you are with her, make sure that you bump into her and be nonchalant. Who knows, maybe she'll be intrigued by your sudden mysteriousness and ask YOU to coffee.

Well I think we have lots of things we could talk about, but I feel weird talking about them when I know she's not interested. So the point is to get her interested first. I know I'm not going to call her like October 1st, that would be lame. I'll probably give it a few days. Maybe a week.

Well, Banini.......I can see you are man not to be deterred come hell or high coffee!! :-) - so I say.....go prove us all wrong in October.....I for one will be delighted if you get the outcome you desire...(As Del-boy would say....."he who dares...wins!!!" Good luck.

Alana x

I don't think it will seem like I'm obsessing if I wait a week into October to call her.

well she's making time in october.

*** she'll keep playing games

She isn't playing games. You are freaking her out. The more you persist the more you are going to freak her out. The poor girl has said no everyway possible.

Listen to Cookie and everyone else here.

I'm not stupid. I know most of what you guys are saying is true, but I'm going to call her anyway.

Well, I wish you luck Banini. I really hope we are wrong. let us know when you call.

You know I got a story you should read banani, I receive these in email once in awhile to always remind me -- Its some advice site i forget but i'm not the person the letter writer sent this too -- just read it and decide which person you are in this story.

Dave,

You are a saint. A giant among insects... Ok,
maybe not, but it gets through the obligatory ass-
kissing since you have helped me so much. Let me
begin...

I've had my eyes on this particular girl for quite
some time, and I could tell she was already into
me quite a bit, but we had never made anything of
it. Last week, she decided to "be bold" and ask ME
out, instead of the other way around (you can see
I'm already doing something right). She asked if I
wanted to go see a movie some time; instead of
freaking out and jumping at the chance, I said I'm
rather tired of this whole 'movie date' thing. If
she wanted to get me, she was going to have to be
a little more creative. She was rather shocked and
felt somewhat rejected. Later in the conversation,
we were got to talking about this stalker (wussy
who needs a life) that seems to be in love with
her, and she hates him. He had asked her if she
wanted to accompany him to a football game the
next night that they both were already going to.
She said she really wished that I would come with
her so this guy would leave her alone. I thought,
"Ok. This will be my good deed for the year." and
said I would go. She ends up driving me to the
game. Upon arrival, she just HAD to braid her
hair, and asked me to wait around while she did
so. I stood there for a second, and then walked
off. She started yelling at me to wait; I simply
replied, "I'll see you inside the gate." waved and
walked off.

Once inside, I didn't see her come in,
but soon felt someone grab my butt (it was her).
We went on into the stadium, she soon saw someone
she knew and went to talk to them, dragging me
along. I stood around for a second, then wandered
off, since I had seen someone I knew as well. She
comes to find me soon, and we go off to our seats.
Her stalker had seen us as we were going to our
seats and decided to stay with us for part of the
night. She began talking to him, and I did my own
thing. I wandered off numerous times throughout
the night and generally acted very secure and like
I didn't need a thing in the world (especially
her!). Following the game, as we walked back to
her car I could tell that she wanted me badly due
to some things she had been saying. She drove me
back to where my car was waiting and we talked for
twenty minutes or so in her car. There was some
hand holding and such going on during the
conversation. She said, "You know we're just going
to end up making out-you're just delaying the
inevitable." Bingo. I shrugged it off, and we
continued talking. About ten minutes later, she
said, "It's getting late; I really should be
getting home." Obviously a ploy to get things
started, as it was only 10:15 PM. I shrugged it
off, again. A few minutes pass, and she says,
"It's late, I really need to go." I say,
"Alright." I open the door and get out of the car.
She says, "Where are you going?" I reply
nonchalantly, "I just don't think you want it
badly enough yet." Score #2. I walk off to my car;
she immediately jumps out of the car and begins
walking to my car as well. I get to the car and
put the key in the door and she sticks her leg in
front of the door with this defiant attitude. I
say, "You know, I've never been raped in an empty
parking lot before..."

You can imagine what went on from there?

Thanks Dave.

D. Knoxville, TN

I've sort of been both guys, but I haven't gotten nearly as far as either of them. And, I don't want to either. I just want a chance to shine for her, and yeah, I won't be able to if she only gets coffee with me to get me off her back.

I'm telling you dude if you want her you have to back off and be a challenge. you have to make her guess what is going on with you. Send mixed signals -- she will guess what the hell is going on with you and it will drive her crazy. Be a challenge and use humor. Be cocky but in a funny way, Don't call her, let her call you. Always have her call you next when you get turned down with a girl or else you will look desperate. She will think she can have you anytime she wants. Have a life. Be busy. Return phone calls 3 days. Don't jump at the first bait if any you get, wait for more good bait to come. And Please don't have the authorities get involved.

you say you have myspace -- my suggestion is to take her off your top 8 (im guessing shes your number one by the sounds of things) put some new girl there that you like or get a new gf. Sooner or later she will look back and be like what happened and might leave you a comment if shes into you. If not forget it she will never happen.

Girls don't like this kind of stuff dude... I gaurentee you will get no where if you keep doin this. I suggest you go to askmen.com and read articles. Or go buy the double your dating book by david deangelo. I know it sounds pathetic that I read a book but seriously it will clean you up on what to do. Do this. Im serious atleast go read some articles on askmen.com if anything.

Be chickeny but in a funny way, Don't call her, let her call you.

meant to say be a lil too proud on some things but it bleeps out

c
o
c
k
y

whats chickeny? shy? hey, what if like towards the end of october I called her, and told her I was just calling to make sure she still thinks I'm obsessed with her, and if she says she does, then I'll just be like, okay cool, later.

no dxpnet blocked out the other word i wanted to say, its the opposite -- confident, boastful not chickeny. If you want a chance with her you have to forget about her at the moment, never call her again unless she talks to you. NEVER CALL HER AGAIN UNLESS SHE CALLS YOU FIrST. Take her off your myspace. If she ever calls you back -- depends what you want... let her ask you out never ask her for coffee again. If she asks you out you can either go with it or wait for something better. If you really don't talk to her again IM SURE SHE WILL CALL YOU SOMEDAY only if you do what i said and ONLY WHAT I DO. You cant do some of these and be successful, you have to do it all always. just do this, Im done explaining what to do, its your turn to do this if you want to be successful.

scorpio with leo moon

I'm Leo sun, Gemini moon, and Taurus rising. I should do a new post about that. And take your advice skippy. Well it's everyone's advice really. If you tip the libran scales one way really far, and then let go, do they tip just as far back the other way?

Hey, it's October now... haha.

yeah exactly, it'd be funnier than butter.

I mean, I guess I am still thinking about her huh. I don't think it's desperate. I think it's stupid, but I don't see it as desperate, because it's not like I'm thinking, omg I need her I need her what am I going to do omg. I don't even want to date her, just coffee.

I hear you Banini. You just want companionship.

yeah, but I'm not desperate for that either. I recently started living on my own actually, and some days I'm perfectly content to not see any friends at all, male or female. Getting coffee with this girl is just something I would do if the opportunity arose, and I think of it as mostly just a big joke because I've bugged her about doing it so much and I know rockchick is right about what she would be thinking. So IF I called her this month, I would just do it to be a jerk, and I would think it was funny.

Well, it's kind of a, I know what you think but I don't care so I'm gonna call you anyway. I probably won't call her though.

Yeah. Well I was thinking if I do it, I'll sarcastically say that I'm doing to maintain the pathetic image she has of me, it was the most pathetic thing I could think of, and she should have expected it since it's just the kind of thing I would do.

maybe she'd rather do something funner....
ask her if she wants to go bungy jumping or scuba diving or surf...
bet you she'll change her mind. get creative my braddah.
and remeber, libras are very spontaneous, so ask her just before you are going already. don't giver her a chance to say anything but.....um, ya.
coffee sucks anyways.

aloha

when you ask her, make her feel like she's about to miss the train....and you are there to make sure she doesn't get left out.

aloha

alright well lets wait until little_sparrow tweets in one this before we take any further action.

tweet! hee!

F if I know! Have you seen the mess of my dating life? lol!

Bungee jumping? That is terrible advice.

If you want a Libra, sometimes you need to just to be a little aggressive. I think your best bet is just saying, "I have had enough. We are going for coffee in an hour. Be ready." or just show up at her door and say it.

She will pout around and be all upset but secretly, if she likes you at all, she will love it.

Morning choco!

I have been snickering and chuckling about the situation with the Leo since yesterday. In the bath last night, I was laughing so hard my roomie had to knock on the door to make sure I was okay. I have seriously acted like a complete buffoon. HAHAHAHA!

Banini is a younger leo.

chocolate, yeah, I am a leo, and I'm, well, there's that TV show with that dude whos dad was in backdraft and stuff. And also the girl from next door...

yeah, not really. I'm learning though I think. I've learned a ton in the last year. I'm not really sure what I've learned, but I have to have learned something. I was trying to explain how old I was with the "24" reference. Oh wait, oops.

choco it is on the libra forumn under Annoying Leo Males.

no! I meant what I am laughing about is posted over there. I see the error of my ways. lol!

mmkay. I read somewhere that a good place for a libra and leo to go together is like an art museum or something. There are a bunch of those around here. But, I think the coffee would be better in this situation.

Haha, I ended up calling her... I could tell she was pissed and just trying not to be. I feel bad, because I know it must creep her out, but at the same time if she can't see how amazing I am, she deserves to be creeped out and annoyed. Maybe not, but thats what I think right now.

yeah... okay new topic.

Why was she pissed?

Why was she pissed?

I dunno, it just seemed like it from her tone. She was like, "dude... we don't even have any mutual friends anymore" and I said, "why would we need those?" and then she sort of sighed, and said "look, this is like a really busy time for me so thanks, but no thanks."

I guess so.

I really don't think this girl is into you Banini. I am sorry.

I think I've made myself too annoying to get stepped on.