Am I the other woman? This is whack.

I'm not into all these social networking things at all - can this girl see that you are watching her tweets?

As to your problem...

You are currently not going steady as you have said. That means he may well have other women he is not going steady with. His current set of friends may not even know his ex or even had the man talk to them about her. Male code means that we say anything to keep the woman happy that is with one of our friends. It is not our place to make her upset or tell her things that our friend is doing behind her back. We'd be more likely to make sure she has a good time with us because we feel so bad about the situation. I don't mean to unnerve you further however.

You say he went home for the weekend, what were her tweets like after this event?

You mention a 'baby' or a 'boo' i assume you mean that they may have had a baby together? If this is the case they may not be dating but he will see his offspring because this is the usual thing. This other girl may even be trying to get back with him if this is the case which is what these pictures are all about.

As to hints they can mean anything, i could hint to a girl she'll get a holiday off me and then not bother to arrange one at all because i plan to switch women i'm with in one months time. It's too up in the air to say definitively. However, you're stating that you think he has a 'secret ex-girlfriend' which is what confuses me. If she is the ex why do you care? You should only worry about the problem if it seems like he is messing you about.

I know you are considering detaching as you put it but you really should confront him first. If you don't you will never know, he will remain confused if he isn't actually doing anything wrong, and you could mess up something that is perfectly legitimate. If he does have a child with his ex you need to know because it will complicate things. If he is cheating you need to know because it will end things. You are at a cross in the roads emotionally and you should not fall in love before these suspicions are dealt with. Blind love is not good and neither is a relationship built on mistrust and worries.

You don't trust him if you are checking up on him. I try to give the benefit of the doubt also, but for me, it only lasts for so long, unless they have shown me that they are being genuine (or I perceive them that way). Honestly, it is hard not to bring past issues into new relationships (I.e. trust).

You are doing an awful lot of speculating here...
any chance you can't just ask him?
You are perfectly entitled to some personal clarity.

Are you interested in something more? If not, and you are having legitimate doubts then I would suggest you scale back and/ or end it all togther.
If yes, then what is wrong with asking him about being exclusive etc?

Right. So you want to be the bit on the side, bury your head, protect you heart and just carry on as normal do you?

This is insane.

I'd love to tell you he has a twin brother and everything will be alright but my leo senses are tingling. Sounds like someone is playing the fiddle - you did say he was a musician right?

Do yourself a favour. Talk to him about it. He may tell you its ended, he may deny everything all together. Or you may just have a much better college life with someone else that cares for you properly.

Also, none of this is your fault. We men are bastards. I should know, i am one and have been told enough 😛

"I honestly don't know why you even bothered posting this: did you expect people to reassure you of his fidelity when you've asserted you've gotten red flags and "put two and two together"? It sounds like you're pretty clear in your suspicions and convictions already so, the only thing left is to just leave."

To meekimoo: I posted this here because I didn't know where else to go. I don't expect anyone to sugarcoat anything and just smother me with reassuring words that my suspicions are absolutely ridiculous. I just wanted to have people assess the situation and assert whatever opinion they would like to give, whether good or bad, because sometimes I need a push, and sometimes I need a listening ear. Plus, I like this forum.

"Right. So you want to be the bit on the side, bury your head, protect you heart and just carry on as normal do you?

This is insane."

This does sound insane. I am a naive person. Relationship-wise I would consider myself to be inexperienced. So yeah, maybe I am dumb for choosing that route, but I don't plan on doing this forever--only until I come across more tangible evidence. At max, two more weeks. I just need to be sure and calculating before I make any real moves.

Although everyone's words are definitely making me reconsider this course of action. I'll keep you guys posted. Thank you!

And obviously I wouldn't be posting this if my Leo senses weren't tingling as well. I just needed to let it out somewhere. So to those willing to read my walls upon walls of text, I appreciate it.

Don't worry, leo's are a universal pride. Gotta look after each other.

Just keep in mind we all make dating mistakes. *raises hand* you have to sift through the "bad" to get to the good.

You guys are right. I was mulling over it in the shower and I think I'd rather just confront. Thanks for da input, all!

Posted by meekimoo

Posted by christinelovessnickers
Just keep in mind we all make dating mistakes. *raises hand* you have to sift through the "bad" to get to the good.

*raises hand too*

I'm happy I landed a big, good fish (pair of fishes?) at the end of the run 🙂

click to expand

I hope to say that eventually! *sigh*