I've been talking to a leo for a couple of months now. We recently got back in touch after 10 years. He says he has had a crush on me all this while and is quite flirty. But when i ask about work or questions regarding his life, he's very evasive. It feels like a cat and mouse game. I actually have to dig answers out of him.
I asked him why he's so hard to get to know and his response was, 'haha, yes, many people have told me that' [see? not really an answer]
He also calls himself an introvert (but is quite free with the flirting)
My question is, is this shady behaviour or is this leo genuinely private? If private,how do i make him open up? i can't reciprocte his feelings till i get to know him better.
(He has a taurus moon, so he's crazy stubborn too.) (i'm a scorpio with a cancer moon, but not crazy, i promise)
Beware and be wary of a person who you have not seen in 10 years that is secretive and evasive.
Let me guess, he found you on Facebook or some other social network, right. So many women are getting played by old flames and crushes online.
I dunno, all the Leo's in my family are open books.
You'd think after 10 years he'd be open about his job, his prior love life and his family. For me it's shady behavior because there is no way you can get to know a man if he's unwilling to be available.
Do not trust him with your heart, you don't know him, he's unwilling to allow you to get to know him therefore you do not know if you can trust him with your heart, nor can you trust him with any sensitive/personal information about yourself.
Give it time but cut your losses if it's 6 months down the road and he's still playing Mr. Shy guy which is really code for cray cray/crazy.
Is he an August Leo or July Leo? August Leo's and Leo's born on the cusp of Virgo which are late August Leo's can be very secretive and evasive.
My aunt's a Leo and her birthday was on the cusp of Virgo and she was and still is an anomaly. Her dark side was unbearable and none of it was good. Her outside persona was very fun, flirty, full of passion and life and yet the side she displayed towards family/us and people she was close to was totally different, she could be mean, greedy, distant, never truly close to anyone intimately, I could go on and on. There's a couple more August Leo's in my family and honestly I love em at a distance.
I'm more attracted to July Leo's because what you see is what you get and they are much more open and transparent than August Leo's.
Disclaimer: I'm not painting every Leo with a broad brush, I'm speaking strictly of my own experiences with Leo's.
I am insanely private. I don't like the word secretive as it carries malice. For me it is a protection to my vulnerabilities. Plus I don't like just anyone in my life and business. If I am in an intimate setting and intimate relationship (whether friendship, family or my mate) if it is something I do not want to share or ready to share I will say now is not the time or I do not want to answer that.
My mate is also a Leo and he is also the same. There are things about each other we are still getting to know and it is slow in that manner. He has called me his best friend and I feel he is mine and I have given him the ultimate trust no one has ever held. We don't push for information, but when one ask we will give each other the truth. And if a situation occurs we will share those inner thoughts and feeling or experiences.
It comes down to being protective of our inner self and vulnerabilities because if given we they can be easily used to harm us. We are tough on the outside but that toughness only protects something that is amazing soft and easily pierced.
A Leo has his/her outside persona who is generally fun-loving and sociable. We can be terrific actors playing for an adoring audience.
But inside, we are shaped by life experiences. A Leo who has been hurt one too many times can often retreat and be wary of giving too much to the wrong people.
Perhaps try a different approach. Rather than asking about his life now, try asking about his life during the past 10 years. You just may find out the root issues.
Once he knows he can trust you, I'm willing to bet he'll open up.
Wow, First off, thank you everyone sooo much for responding. It's really nice of all of you.
I made a mistake, he's not a taurus moon, he's a gemini moon. I'm so sorry for screwing that up.
@darkfire @raindance88, you're right. i should let him open up about the things he wants to at his own pace.
@tiki33 thank you for the insight, he found me on gtalk, we were in the same class in high school. he was a total nerd, even then he was pretty quiet and awkward, now, ten years later we're in our mid twenties and in the same city (small city) and he has a high responsiblity/high visiblity government job. So he has to be a little cautious since his career has just started out. But i totally get what you're talking about, and i'm a very sensitive person, i think it's best to take your advice, and protect my heart 🙂
He's a july leo, quiet but intensely ambitious and hard working.
@thelioness79 yes, intuitively, that's what i think about him too, that he's just being tough on the outside because he's really vulnerable on the inside. (but as you can see, my sun and moon are both very emotional, i can't really trust my judgement 🙂) Any tips on how i can help him see i'm not going to hurt him?
@zelazeZ Thanks. He's an introverted july leo. (is that even possible?)
@missfisk 🙂 high unlikely. we're both in a small city and barely 25.
@spicensugar that's great insight. he hates talking about himself and just gives me really short answers (but wont stop texting or flirting). it's really confusing. but i will definitely keep eye out for any hints about why he is the way he is.
@kittyknitter thank you so much for all the replies. even i prefer listening to other people than talking about myself, so i guess that's where we're having trouble. unfortunately, his work is his whole life, so there's not much to talk about outside of work. maybe i should just keep it light and fun and let him be, right?
Nina have you asked him directly if he's in a long term relationship, living with someone and/or married or not married? It's important that you establish if he's single. Ask him straight out if he does not answer then yes he's taken and/or possibly married. This is the one question that has a yes or no answer.
Also if he's not opening up to you naturally then don't pry, what will happen is you'll probably get bored of the shallow vapid surface stuff ie flirting etc and things will naturally dissolve into the abyss of nothingness whence it came or he'll step up and begin to offer up information about himself or he'll lose his connection with you if he persist on being shallow and evasive.
I get an uneasy feeling about an introverted Leo, I've never met one and don't want to lol.
@seraph oh god you're so right. I do have this thing about total emotional security. I really need to loosen up and let people be. I am taking your advice and going slow, see where this takes us, trying to go with flow (it's really hard, but i'm working on it). Thank you so much for the insight.
@tiki33 i did ask him, and he's single. From what i gather he's just generally quiet. Luckily he's travelling abroad at the moment and i can finally put things in perspective. The 'chemistry' or the 'connection' was too much and was messing with my head! scorpios and leos don't have such a whirlwind connection do they?
Hm coming from a Taurus(female)with Aquarius moon and Taurus in Mercury. Love is a battlefield haha. I don't like PDA at all. So I am not a leo but I am intensely private.
Hm any Taurus period whether in sun, moon or whatever are always slow and steady and we don't rush. AND our emotions run deep at times. (I think if the connection is there right away, you should stop dating everyone else and focus on that one)Maybe too deep.
??Anyone one with Air or Mutable or Cardinals signs requires much more space, intellectual stimulation, and they don't show or talk of emotions. It's rare and I haven't seen it yet. They hardly are content in long term relationships. If you managed great for you.
They would rather have sex without strings attached. They are swingers. Apart from Gemini where I always think you may have two people in your life at one time. I don't share even my Aquarius side would turn possessive and then the jealous side peeks out. Damn.
Being a fixed I am always having a hard time with Sagittarius male. Why because the sexual chemistry at first gets me all out of sorts. Lol. Of course sex is mainly outside in the environment for the whole world to see they are not private, neither are Gemini. Very open.
Here's a little update, in case anyone's interested. The leo and I had been talking quite a bit and he started calling me pretty much everyday (night, actually). So, since he was calling me at, like, 1.30 or 2 in the morning, i got sleep deprived over time because i have to be at work by 8.00. One night, i was half asleep and mumbled something about a headache and hung up on him. He got really angry and texted me, asking me to never call or text him again. I called him the next day to sort things out and he wouldn't take my calls, i decided to be patient and texted him to pick up and he treated me quite badly (over text) and when he finally picked up,i asked him what's wrong, he hung up on me! (the whole thing lasted about an hour, from my first call to his hanging up)
By this time my patience (and self control) ran out and i stopped contacting him.
so i guess, that's that, scorpios and leos don't really get along, oh well 🙂
We are transparent yet we have deep dark secrets. We also have pride and never went to be rejected or judged so that's part of our reason for having such secrets. We also don't want your opinions or suggestions in how to handle our life. We tend to do pretty well making our own decisions.
@justaleo: I get what you mean, I'm a Scorpio if I could live *inside* my so I would. Creepy, I know. But life was hectic then and getting three hours of sleep on a daily basis was really messing with me. We worked it out for a while but due to some other circumstances, we are no longer together.
@salamandercandy @dontgetmewrong he's a quiet Leo, very protective of himself and those he considers 'his'. He opens up sometimes now because he sees how happy that makes me. He knows that's what makes me feel loved and trusted so he goes a little beyond for me. Well all that is in past tense, we're not together anymore.
I'm an August Leo. I can't speak for all Leos but I am definitely secretive. Not necessarily because I am hiding anything bad, I just don't like people knowing my business and if I do air it out it's typically to people who can't divulge it to anyone I know personally like on a message board for instance. 😉 Not entirely trusting of people.
Most Leo's I know are very secretive with things, I always thought it was because they like having an element of mystery. It's funny because most of the Leo's I know who are secretive, are also extremely nosy! 😉
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I asked him why he's so hard to get to know and his response was, 'haha, yes, many people have told me that' [see? not really an answer]
He also calls himself an introvert (but is quite free with the flirting)
My question is, is this shady behaviour or is this leo genuinely private? If private,how do i make him open up? i can't reciprocte his feelings till i get to know him better.
(He has a taurus moon, so he's crazy stubborn too.)
(i'm a scorpio with a cancer moon, but not crazy, i promise)