How do keep it casual with a Leo?

This guy has been coming on strong from the beginning when I thought he was trying to buy me. We get along about fifty percent of the time, the rest I am ready to kill him. He is the only person more stubborn than I am. Still, somehow, I found myself in bed with him and it was amazing. Honestly, I have limited partners, but it was the best ever. I tried to get rid of him. Somehow a few days later I find myself sitting down with him as he tells me we are in a relationship. I said I prefer no titles, but he tells me, "no, we are together." He is offering me the world. He knows I am separated, but still married. He asked if I have interest in anyone else. I told him I am in love with another man. He wanted to know a few details. He seemed fine, and blew the other guy off as "a figment of my imagination". He asked me if I thought I could ever love him back. I told him probably not. He is trying to pull me into his business. The thing is I love our physical chemistry and pleasant conversations, but I do not see this being long term. He says we are " forever ". Is there any way to still be together, but to force things to be a little more casual? I already feel the answer is " no", but any advice is appreciated. I mean, this guy told me his greatest wish in life is that I didn't get my tubes tied!!!

its all or nothing with a leo, if we love u we love all the wayyyy if u want something more "casual" and just want to hook up maybe you should try a different sign, it already does not look good...

also u seem disgusted by him in some way...im sure he did not get there on his own...

Posted by Ssupes
You can't. If he sets his sights on you and has determined he wants you. He will either have you or walk away. You can't be casual with a Leo male if he has the hots for ya. That's where he can't see a middle ground. You can't convince him an antelope dont taste good.

That holds true for Leo females too. :-)

Lol@ the Seinfeld clip.

I am not saying I want something casual in general. I just did not want to move this fast. Maybe, and only maybe, I would find him much more interesting in a serious way if we moved into things slower. I have casually known him for months. We had a handful of cconversations over the course of several months. We have only been dating a few weeks and he pulled out the L word? This fast pace scares the hell out of me. Yes, I absolutely slept with him earlier than I should have, in my opinion, not his. I told him I was never going to sleep with him one night and I swear he made it his personal mission to get me before the night was over. I honestly feel he is trying to punish me in bed for not wanting him the way he wants me. I like it. I am not going to lie, that is the reason I agreed to sit down and chat with him after I tried to end things. I was thinking of the sex. Not only is it amazing, I also know I am not going to go out and find a new f buddy. That is not my style. But I wonder if he just relaxed if I could gain more feelings for him.

Posted by Impulsv
Some signs know their feelings faster than others.

And that Leo ain't one of them.

I tell him exactly how I feel. I want to go slower. I like him, but can't feel that strong yet. I am not sleeping with anyone else. I ask him not to talk about relationships and love. This makes me laugh now, but he talks about it anyway and tells me I better not bring it up later. Yes, yes, he tries to fuck me into submission. I do admit, there have been a few times I have been a little more resistant to him in bed (he is a talker and asks tons of questions) than I needed to be just because I wanted to see how hard he would try to make me say what he wants. Ha!

I also can't help but wonder why he would think he loves me so soon. There has been a lot of turmoil. I don't like the idea that he may think he loves me because I am his personal physical ideal. I find in general I run into men that idealize me into someone or something I am not at all. I think he may know the person I am a bit, but he wants to "tame" me into the woman he wants me to be. It is like I should be submissive with him, but he still wants me to be a strong boss chick with the rest of the world.

And when I said I was done I meant it.it was not just talk at the time. He got mad at me for telling him "have a nice day." That was offensive because to him it meant I was not going to see him that day. That was not what I meant, but actually I did not plan on seeing him anyway. I told him I was done because I am not interested in tip toeing around my words like that

*sigh* got it. Thanks for the advice. We will see how this goes.....

The other person I am in love with is a cancer I have been talking to since last year. He lives in a different city. I have never even touched him. We have both admitted feelings, but I was married. When I met him he had a month old baby, his first. Started as friendship, but I realize now he always wanted me to fall in love. He feels guilty I left my husband and thinks my husband should come get him. He is still with his gf. He has been reaching out to me only when something significant happens. For example, I heard from him when I told my husband I was moving out, when I found a place to move to, when I actually moved out, and when I actually told him I loved him but that I needed to let him go for his sake.

The thing about just being fuck buddies, that is strange to me. Maybe that is what I want? But, I am not going to be sleeping with anyone else. Also, I want to talk with him for a couple hours before we get in bed. I also like going on dates and stuff too. Would this still be fuck buddies?

I like dating him, I just know that he is not the one. He is not forever. I have no problem not being with other guys, as long as my cancer does not decide to come around (chances are he won't.)

I am guessing it is also typical of Leos to be controlling? Last night he was very insistent that I drove straight home after seeing him. I made a joke about stopping somewhere else on the way and I just got stone face. This is the stuff that scares me away.

See, that is why you ask questions you think you know the answer to. I have been so focused in the leo's controlling ways, ego, and the fact that I thought he was trying to buy me. I never even considered that I was F'ing him over. It is so early in the "relationship" to me that I could not see it that way. Thanks for the new perspective everyone.

BTW, certainly not getting my emotional fill from the cancer. I was at one point. It has been months though. I have a difficult time moving on once I have set my mind on something. It has been becoming clearer to me lately that it may be time to open myself up to someone else. It is tough when I am stuck in my head and heart.

Why is she being pinned to the wall here when she's been as open and honest as can be with him? He is the cognitively impaired one assuming she means the opposite of what she's saying. Whatever is between them, there's certainly is a HUGE gap in the EQ/communication department since (a) he obviousely has zero respect for anything that she says and thinks, and (b) he "loves" her for all the ways he can make her dependent on him.

And don't hint or tell him you "need time" bc that in itself is a promise of something somewhere down the line, you said it yourself, you're not really interested in this guy. Don't sell him that he's more than a rebound. He's already doing it perfectly well to himself. Wonder what his Moon sign is.

Sag moon

" he tells me we are in a relationship."
'I said I prefer no titles, but he tells me, "no, we are together."'
'He seemed fine, and blew the other guy off as "a figment of my imagination".'
'He says we are " forever ".'
'this guy told me his greatest wish in life is that I didn't get my tubes tied!!!'

You guys are actually sticking up for this guy? WTF... tell that guy he's a F'ing psycho and get the hell out of there!

Maaaan, that would piss me off so much, who does he think he is like hahahaha

Exactly.

She clearly stated she wants to keep things casual. In fact it's the title of this thread. She's told him how she feels (or doesn't feel)?? about him, even said she had feelings for an other man! He's dismissed pretty much EVERYTHING she's said that doesn't fit his world order. We're talking a whole new level of retardedness.

All she wants is some nice D and a cup of coffee. "How do I go about getting that from a Leo? " seems to be the fine print here.

Ok yeah, I agree that continuing this is completely ridiculous, and she should stop contacting him... that's why I said to do so. ^^^

Doesn't change the fact that it is overly controlling behaviour and he has no right to tell her what it is and what it isn't.

And let's not even bring 'women can do no wrong' in to this because that's totally not what's going on here... and it's a tiring convo nobody really wants to get in to. V___V

Posted by Ssupes
There is zero way to get that from this Leo without a relationship. Dude is already love struck.

Ssupes is 100% on the money. This is Leo (male or female). FWB doesn't exist for us. If she wants casual, no games no fuss, Aquarius might be a better option.

Lost Bull, he can't be friends with you or a casual sex partner. If you don't want a lot of drama (doing what you're doing will provoke lots of it) and don't see yourself serious with this guy, you have to stop. Don't respond, don't flirt, ignore and evade, with NO trying to be nice about it. He'll keep trying for a while and then give up and move on.

The only way this will end is if you do that, or give him the commitment he's pushing for.

Leos are simple, right? 😉

Ha! Seems they are simple. You guys put it in black and white. It is all or nothing. I personally think everyone has a point. Dude is a little crazy. I have also been talking to him and visiting him daily. Now I know. Thanks!

Why doesn't this thread surprise me? Leos always always get used like that. We give our all and try to make people happy but then there's selfish people who just wanna use! U came on here wrote a whole novel about how gross and creepy he is but you've been seeing and talking to him daiky? Lool you and the cancer deserve each other because a Leo doesn't play games and if only everyone was that straightforward and honest...this is why leos don't give a dame about u once we've made up our minds and people cry lol smhhhhh

You slept with him.... heh.

We can't tell you anything you don't already know.

You lunar LEOs are worse than we are... his obsession

with you has you positively intoxicated!

Enjoy yourself, and keep us posted. 😄

Montgomery - you remembered my Leo moon. You know too much. You are right, I am flattered by the attention, I just dislike the control. I will keep you posted.

Ssupes - I am a fixed sign too. I like all or nothing too, once I decide. I just didn't expect it so quick.


I have to admit, in the two days since I first posted this, this guy is growing on me. I decided to stop fighting him on EVERYTHING. In return, he has stopped trying to force his money on me and has been putting a little less pressure on me. It has become pretty comfortable. And the things he is still a little controlling about, he shared a very personal story about his family that helps me understand he is actually less controlling than I thought and more caring. So, I am going to ride this for a while in light of the changes and see what happens. I am not sure, like he seems to be about "forever", but it might be worth seeing where this goes, with a little caution.

Posted by LostBull
Montgomery - you remembered my Leo moon. You know too much. You are right, I am flattered by the attention, I just dislike the control. I will keep you posted.

I hear you.... whatever happens, I hope it's good. 🙂

This thread doesnt surprise me either ... I am in a relationship with my Leo .. after breaking up with the cancer guy (who by the way has been only using me for emotional support only n Im extremely happy to put an end to it) .. My Leo bf was too moving too fast for me .. obviously he developed feelings for me way earlier than I did ... I told him we should slow down .. and yes things got physical way too early ... but to be honest, eventhough I have doubted his intentions from the very beginning.. He proves me wrong everyday, I do know and feel that he truely cares and loves me.. yes Leos seem possessive and they are, but when they feel theres something from your side.. I honestly liked him alot from the very beginning and I guess you are too liking this Leo .. I'm not sure if this will grow into love for you, but for me it surely did, even after realizing his big flaws

Seems like you need to tell him exactly what your intention is.

Yes! That is it. Leo's interest does come off as infatuation or fake. That is so accurate. More and more it seems sincere. Last time I saw this Leo we were just sitting across from each other watching the news. He kept looking at me and asking, "why don't we just get married? We are perfect." (This from the man that told me on our first real meeting and at least ten times since that he will never marry) Although I enjoy him, I respond, " you know this isn't forever. " He just laughs at me, tells me I have too much going on in my life to recognize how deep my feelings actually are for him. Later that night he asks me to move in. I am not moving in. I guess at this point I have relaxed and just accepted this as a part of his personality. Now, I really only have one big issue with him, but it has nothing to do with everything else discussed.

Posted by LostBull
Yes! That is it. Leo's interest does come off as infatuation or fake. That is so accurate. More and more it seems sincere. Last time I saw this Leo we were just sitting across from each other watching the news. He kept looking at me and asking, "why don't we just get married? We are perfect." (This from the man that told me on our first real meeting and at least ten times since that he will never marry) Although I enjoy him, I respond, " you know this isn't forever. " He just laughs at me, tells me I have too much going on in my life to recognize how deep my feelings actually are for him. Later that night he asks me to move in. I am not moving in. I guess at this point I have relaxed and just accepted this as a part of his personality. Now, I really only have one big issue with him, but it has nothing to do with everything else discussed.

oh now you got me curious..

Well folks, just a little update. Things seemed to be going well with the Leo. He was being do sweet and dreaming way bigger than I was, but it seemed endearing. Still, there were a few things that he had said that were nagging me. Then, the last couple days I started to feel like he was testing me. Asking me to pick something up then complaining that I did not ask him what kind. Asking to borrow money when he has plenty of his own money. I basically gave him the heads up that I would like to meet to have a talk about the issues I saw. During our talk, I saw I was making no progress and started to feel he was trying to blackmail me. I told him things are over. He has threatened to "burn my life to the ground." Says he has videos of everything that happens in his house. Just when I thought I liked him. Trust me, I realize this is not typical Leo behavior (I hope). All my fault. My first instinct day one was to run, and I should have followed it. Now I brace myself and see if anything happens.

Posted by LostBull
Well folks, just a little update. Things seemed to be going well with the Leo. He was being do sweet and dreaming way bigger than I was, but it seemed endearing. Still, there were a few things that he had said that were nagging me. Then, the last couple days I started to feel like he was testing me. Asking me to pick something up then complaining that I did not ask him what kind. Asking to borrow money when he has plenty of his own money. I basically gave him the heads up that I would like to meet to have a talk about the issues I saw. During our talk, I saw I was making no progress and started to feel he was trying to blackmail me. I told him things are over. He has threatened to "burn my life to the ground." Says he has videos of everything that happens in his house. Just when I thought I liked him. Trust me, I realize this is not typical Leo behavior (I hope). All my fault. My first instinct day one was to run, and I should have followed it. Now I brace myself and see if anything happens.

I'm sorry things turned that way ... this doesnt seem like a typical leo behaviour .. maybe he's got scorpio somewhere on his chart? .. can u post his placements?

Anyway it's better you took a stand ... always do whats good for you..

Sun Leo
Moon Sagittarius
Mercury Leo
Venus Virgo
Mars Scorpio
Jupiter Leo
Saturn Aries
Uranus Virgo
Neptune Scorpio
Pluto Virgo

Posted by LostBull
Sun Leo
Moon Sagittarius
Mercury Leo
Venus Virgo
Mars Scorpio
Jupiter Leo
Saturn Aries
Uranus Virgo
Neptune Scorpio
Pluto Virgo

You. Are. In. Deep. Shizzz

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by 037

Posted by LostBull
Sun Leo
Moon Sagittarius
Mercury Leo
Venus Virgo
Mars Scorpio
Jupiter Leo
Saturn Aries
Uranus Virgo
Neptune Scorpio
Pluto Virgo

You. Are. In. Deep. Shizzz

Nah! Scorps are all talk and no action!!

click to expand

I don't know... But I got a bad encounter with a revengeful scorpio.. who was by the way worked on back stabbing me in silence..

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by Ssupes

Posted by TxOgal
This thread doesnt surprise me either ... I am in a relationship with my Leo .. after breaking up with the cancer guy (who by the way has been only using me for emotional support only n Im extremely happy to put an end to it) .. My Leo bf was too moving too fast for me .. obviously he developed feelings for me way earlier than I did ... I told him we should slow down .. and yes things got physical way too early ... but to be honest, eventhough I have doubted his intentions from the very beginning.. He proves me wrong everyday, I do know and feel that he truely cares and loves me.. yes Leos seem possessive and they are, but when they feel theres something from your side.. I honestly liked him alot from the very beginning and I guess you are too liking this Leo .. I'm not sure if this will grow into love for you, but for me it surely did, even after realizing his big flaws

That's sweet! I liked reading it!

Leo gotcha!

We move fast and most see it as infatuation or fake. Once they realize that the Leo is sincere, and they give it a real chance.......then it's on like donkey kong

Do you think this is the same with a Leo rising and leo moon enhanced person?

click to expand

What's their mars?

After reading up on Scorpio mars, I am quite terrified. I can only hope busy it right about Scorpios being all talk. Certainly, if nothing else, he appears to hope I live in a state of fear of what he might do. Every other thing I read fit him perfectly though. Even the more obscure aspects that are just suggested as a possibility, that is this man. It is unfortunate that much of his Scorpio mars seems to be what attracted me to him the most.

Posted by busyeyes88
Mars in Taurus!

Probably? ... my Leo bf has Mars in Virgo though

Posted by LostBull
After reading up on Scorpio mars, I am quite terrified. I can only hope busy it right about Scorpios being all talk. Certainly, if nothing else, he appears to hope I live in a state of fear of what he might do. Every other thing I read fit him perfectly though. Even the more obscure aspects that are just suggested as a possibility, that is this man. It is unfortunate that much of his Scorpio mars seems to be what attracted me to him the most.

Don't be terrified .. Let his anger eat him up while you're doing your own thing. You are the winner here you just chose to be happy and mentally healthy 🙂 I'm proud of you

Let me advice you.

Scorpio sun might be all talk, but the mars is not. With Leo sun, we are the penultimate hunter, and we work excellently in the dark.

Do a little ego stroking and ask to be friends. It will help, or else one day, something crazy strikes you and leaves you reeling.

Besides being one myself, I was married to one. Do the damage control now.

Posted by 037
Let me advice you.

Scorpio sun might be all talk, but the mars is not. With Leo sun, we are the penultimate hunter, and we work excellently in the dark.

Do a little ego stroking and ask to be friends. It will help, or else one day, something crazy strikes you and leaves you reeling.

Besides being one myself, I was married to one. Do the damage control now.

i like that .... being friends but with a distance

Hmmm, I tried suggesting we be friends. Pretty sure I can do some ego stroking though. Sucks, with this guy I really rather completely cut off contact, but my life us already in so much turmoil. I can't handle more and neither can thos around me.

Posted by LostBull
Sun Leo
Moon Sagittarius
Mercury Leo
Venus Virgo
Mars Scorpio
Jupiter Leo
Saturn Aries
Uranus Virgo
Neptune Scorpio
Pluto Virgo

Fck that noise and call his bluff.

Don't succumb for a moment... he may *do* something, but

nothing of the magnitude he's suggesting.

Because at the core, he's better than that and he knows it.

Better yet, don't even acknowledge it... at least not anymore

than you already have.

🙂

Call his bluff on what?

Next thing you know, your sex tapes will be on pornhub networks.

Leo sun, Scorpio mars. He will get you.

If you call his bluff, you declare war. If you attempt peace he will question himself.

But, of course, test him.

Monty, do you seriou. think Scorpio mars knows they are better than the base nature in us?

I'm seriously battling some of my latest 'misdeeds' so I'd like to hope I can still be considered good.

Yes, I am concerned about where said tapes may end up. Are there tapes? He won't show them if he has them. He certainly told me he plans on sending them to my soon to be ex husband. We aren't together, but he was always nervous I would take my ex back. Now he wants to show him this. Trust me, although I do not mind my ex knowing I have been dating, the tapes would destroy him. If there is a tape, it is not tame.

Last night I tried to call his bluff and sent him a message just telling him to go ahead and do what he wants to do. Destroy me, I have nothing else to lose in my life. After reading the input here I sent an apology and kissed butt, still letting him know that I can't be with him right now because I need to work on myself and my children. I need to put them first and that means not being with anyone right now. He has told me I need to focus on my kids, so I think he gets that.

He responded hours later. Asked me to meet him tonight. He has something important to show me and he told me it was very important for me that he accepts my apology. He also asked me to shell out for some expensive food he wanted to cook tonight. I told him the truth, that I can't afford to buy him food. I agreed to meet him. I feel blowing him off would be a bad idea. I am, however, very nervous about this meeting.

Don't meet with a person who threatens you. that is super dangerous .

Don't go. Make an excuse. Say your nether region is itchy. You can't be out in public.

This guy asking for your money confuses me. Are you sure he has money himself?

Maybe he is posing. He is actually broke.

Possibly he has less money than he claims? I do think him asking to borroe cash is just a form of control. I did meet with him. He seemed very laid back and nice. Then he very calmly told me he would be at my job the next day to talk to my soon to be ex husband and that he already told another of my family members. I told my ex right away. Met with him. Did not want him to.not be warned about the next day. Then, I asked the other family member of she saw him today. She told me she had not. He was bluffing! Will he even come tomorrow? I was played. I was played hard. In the end, it really should not matter. My marriage was already over. I just hope this is all he has. But, the fact remains, he won.

Posted by LostBull
Possibly he has less money than he claims? I do think him asking to borroe cash is just a form of control. I did meet with him. He seemed very laid back and nice. Then he very calmly told me he would be at my job the next day to talk to my soon to be ex husband and that he already told another of my family members. I told my ex right away. Met with him. Did not want him to.not be warned about the next day. Then, I asked the other family member of she saw him today. She told me she had not. He was bluffing! Will he even come tomorrow? I was played. I was played hard. In the end, it really should not matter. My marriage was already over. I just hope this is all he has. But, the fact remains, he won.

He hasn't won. If you don't play the game, its his loss.

Yeah, I am done. Received a text this morning to call him. I am not. He does what he does. If I find a video of me online there is not much I can do at this point. I have no clue what he might do. I should have followed my instincts and ran in the beginning. Instead, I choose to have fun and eventually open myself up to him. That is my fault. Our instincts are our best guide. I chose to ignore them, so this is my bed and I must lay in it.