AND .... he walked by me on the street

So .... I may have just walked past the Leo-who-got-away on the street. He looks very different as he now wears glasses so I am only 85% sure it is him. I think I passed him last week as well.

So ... if it is him, I think he works 1/2 a block from me. (Or at least where I am working for the next two weeks. Business move.)

It makes sense that he would be working there because of what that building is.

I am 85-90% sure it was him cause we did a triple take at each other. Kinda of a I sort of recognize you but you look different thing. Weird. Weird. Weird.

AND I came home and had to call one of his best friends.

Weird. Weird. Weird.

Thoughts.

oh memory...lane

u planning to catch up with him for a coffee— Aries can get jealous real fast. 😛

This is such a long story about me and this guy.

Hard to say. I don't think it is finished yet.

We have been chasing each other around most of our lives without knowing it. When he was 13 he moved to the same small town I moved to when I was 15. A few years ago, his mom moved to the even smaller town where my parents where living. He asked me out once on a whim when we were in our teens. We didn't know each other. He just walked up and asked if I wanted to go to a party with him but I was really shy and said no. I remet him the night before my dad died. He asked me a question that changed my life and reminded me who I am. (It doesn't make sense to anyone else.) Then, with no warning or anything, he disappeared. Even though he disappeared, I kept running into people he knew or had met him a couple of times. It just kinda escalated until this summer I found myself at a cottage with his friend cause the Aries is friends with his friends. They invited me to the same party the Leo invited me to on our first date a year prior. And now, in a city of 4 million people, I am at work looking out my desk window at the building I think he works in.

There is way, way, way more to this story. That is the very weird shorten version.

LS, you already know my thoughts on this... 🙂 You two will probably always be connected in some way, or on some level.

I need to decide what to do and how to do it.

LS, it sounds like he's made a reappearance into your life for a reason - just like he has in the past. Don't ignore it.

But what should I do HP? that is what I am struggling with.

Well at this point you are 85-90% sure it was him. First things first - turn that into 100% or 0% . Stop wondering and just find out. It's going to eat you up inside until you grow them girl-balls and find out if it's him.

If it is him? Well he crossed your path again for a reason. Times change; people change. Stop him in the street the next time you see him and just ask "hey are you Johnny? Yes, it is you! Oh my gosh...how long has it been?" and give him a hug.

Disclaimer: the above conversation and action should occur if in fact it is Johnny or you might get maced! LOL 😛

It just kinda ended.

My dad died within hours of our first date. Things got really weird from there. I think he was trying to give me healing space and I didn't really need/want it. He also asked me question that really changed my perspective on life. We saw each other twice (?) after that.

Once I ran from the room and didn't even say good-bye. It was so intense. I didn't know what to do. So I just ran out. The other time was just as weird. He was really hung-over. When I went to leave we just kept hugging, and hugging, and hugging. We hugged for probably 30 minutes. It was like a normal hug either. It was something else.

He showed up at my mom's door in our hometown one weekend when he knew I was there but we missed each other.

We played phone tag and eventually last December he called me and asked me out. We finally seemed on the same page. He remembered everything I had said previous. He had been correcting some of the issues in my life that he had apologized to me earlier about.

We talked about the small town where I had lived until I was 15. His mother is now living there. (My parents had moved back for awhile as well.) He told me the last time he was there he couldn't stop thinking about me and took a page from my book and bought some photography of the place because he had decided that he wanted to wake up next to something that reminded of him of that place for the rest of his life. I made a joke of it and he said, "No. I am giving you a piece of my heart." And I said, "In that case, I will keep it close."

We talked for a long, long time, catching up. Then he invited me over cause he wanted to show me his new place and the art he bought for me. I said no cause it was late. He immediately clammed up and was crushed. I tried to back pedal but it didn't help.

I phoned him a few nights later and he said he was about to watch a movie and would call later. He never did.

I called him New Years Eve and had a bunch of people serenade him. It was so loud it took me a bit to realize he was on the other end and singing along. I gave him a hard time about not being there and his phone cut out. I called back but it went to voice mail.

I was so upset cause I was never certain if he hung up or not.

I called him and he was out of town for work. His phone had cut out. He said he would call when he got back. He never did.

I think I may have called him really drunk (I didn't realize I couldn't drink wine without blacking out at the time.) as several people (who knew I called someone) asked me who I had talked to that night and I couldn't remember. I called and asked him if it was him but he never responded.

I reached out a few times after that to no response.

The last real time I did it was the night before his opening. I just left a friendly VM saying that I heard he got into this festival and wishing him continued success. I knew at the time I wouldn't hear back. I was setting it up for future connection.

We haven't seen each other in over a year until last night. (If indeed it was him.)

I'm sorry about your dad.. my aunt just passed too. Hugs.
He isn't for you.. didn't seem like he ever was.

Actually, I have a lot to lose. I want to go into his field. We have contacts in common. In fact, through odd events, my BF's best friend is also a good friend of Leo's. Few things startled me more than realizing I was sitting around a campfire with the Leo's inner circle.

I have no desire to make a bigger fool of myself than I already have.

I am curious as to why you say that Spica. People who have been watching this story for the past year/year and a half are watching it closely because it is a really crazy situation.

We have lived in all the same places. We look alike. We talk alike. (intonation). We even shared the same giggle. We were on the same career path. I walked away for awhile ... now I am going back to that path.

LS, you need to take time out to mourn your dad instead of thinking about this guy, or even any guys for the matter. My aunt's sudden death came as a shock to me too, and she isn't that close a relation (i mean 2nd to my immediate).

You may be using the leo guy as a distraction for something which you may not want to face.
Don't worry about the contacts. I have contacts of friends whom i made a fool of myself with. Its a six degree of sepearation, sometimes one. And things usually resolve themselves in time. Hugs.

Because I admit I am biased. I don't see him as the guy for you, never have..

Spica

My dad died over a year ago. I wasn't upset about it at all. I knew it was coming. I grieved it out the year prior to his death.

But why? I am just curious.

Psh, I had a virgo date and I find synchronicity in both of us.. me and his ex are doing the same course, we texted each other at the same time many times, we worked at the same place before, and alot of other boggling things.. he was convinced i was meant for him, i just thought we were meant to meet.

It wouldnt be nice to give a biased answer with no proper backup (what astrology does anyway? lol).. but he just seems like a good friend.

P/s: I may be wrong..

I don't know what he is. I really don't know. Perhaps if I met up with him now and had coffee, I would realize I don't really like him at all even AS a friend. I don't know.

* but he just seems like a good friend.

We didn't have chemistry, we had chernobyl.

Unfortunetly, it was all way too intense for both of us and we didn't handle it well.

Hmm, chernobyl sounds explosive. But is it good? Could you live with chernobyl exploding everyday when you live with him?
In silence, complete silence, who do you think about the most? Not from happy memories but from someone who speaks to you without speaking..

I agree Kenny. For a long time, I have needed closure from this. Maybe closure isn't the right word .... I've needed to fix this. I have made such a complete mess of this.

I do believe he is a soulmate. Maybe we aren't meant to be romantically involved but he certainly came into my life to give me a wake up call. He reminded me of who I really was. Kinda like stripping off layers of paint, layers of other people's expectations and took me down to the wood of who I was.

I have to have faith that I will know what to say and do when the time comes. Although I think the time is already here.

LS do it already!!! Don't wait another second.

Kenny

I am not sure if I will run into him on the street again. Do you think I should just email him? Should I apologize?

I am leaning towards emailing him and apologizing.

But do what? Email him?

LS, slow down. Dont let all memories blind your reason. There is no guarantee that it will work even if you ditch your current one and chase that lion down. Dont let you interpret your curiosity as symptoms of love or whatever. Dont let your emotions drive you. Once it fades away, you might stand wondering why you did what you did. Everything that goes through your head right now will only complicate your current relationship. You can choose to use this situation to strengthen your current relationship or you can choose to let it break apart and face the unknown. Fate is the consequences of your decision and thoughts. So decide very very carefully.

Libran

I am not sure what to say as I think you missed the mark. I am not thinking of ditching my partner.

I know I can never 100% commit to my relationship until I put this situation to bed, till I come to terms with it one way or another. It is a question of how. This situation has haunted me for over a year. Who knows whenever what ever happens ... perhaps it will lay it all to rest permanently and I can whole heartedly pursue my current relationship.

The Leo knows I am dating someone. He even knows who I am dating. He has even seen pictures of me with my partner at a Halloween party.

Should I apologize Leok?

no offense but this all seems so weird LS. Leo men aren't that complicated and they don't hold grudges forever, the sun burns too bright on them to let old issues damper a leo's mood, simply say hi, keep it light and keep moving. If you so happen to get some time with him, don't bring up the past, do lunch or a latte and let it be what it's going to be. He's more than likely only remembering the good about you anyway, bringing up the past may be a strike against.

(( I am not sure what to say as I think you missed the mark. ))

looks so. 🙂 i found u all excited and complicating urself in a days time. If you say Leo knows, what bothers you probably is a question of which one can be better. Nothing has to be sorted out unless there is a problem arises in future i guess. Just bcoz you think it was him, why shud u break ur head?? just let it go...

* You have to forgive yourself for acting in that moment. It is over okay LS—

You are right Kenny. I haven't forgiven myself at all. I am so terribly upset about the whole thing.

We only came face to face last night. The first time he was with a bunch of people and I didn't stare at him or anything to be polite. i just thought wow ... he looks a lot like Leo but I think he is taller. When we came face to face, we just did a triple take and decided it was the other. We both kinda hesitated for a split second before walking on. He wears glasses now so he looks different and I look very different as well ... plus I had a hat on, bundled up, etc.

Kenny ... I don't know how to make this easy. 😢

I have never done anything I have regretted before. 😢

I am afraid if I don't email I am missing a chance to put this right. I am not a good liar.

Yeah, I've got to agree with Chocolate. Email your heart away and get to the bottom of it. If you don't have to continue wondering, then don't. I agree with whoever said that Leos aren't that complicated. Just see what's up! :-)

e-mails are so ...not personal..can't u just call him and say "i can't stop thinking --was that really u on the street " ..and just see where the conversation goes from there

Others have mentioned this crossing of paths might be for a reason. I think it needs to be taken into account that the only reason could be to remind and push you to find closure in this and move on. Not saying you haven't considered that but I know from experience when you have strong feelings about something our emotions want to twist the purpose into getting back together, not finding security in being apart.

Calling is NOT an option. It is completely off the table. He never returns my calls. A huge part of that is because he is crazy busy, in other countries, etc. Email is much better cause he can get back to me in his own time.

It could very well be for closure so I don't always have this "what could have been" fantasy in the back of my mind. Or it could be for joint creative venture. Or it could be the beginning of a wonderful happy friendship.

I am writting an email now. I feel really good and positive about it.

this is a side of you i've never seen, LS. I'm surprised you are writing an email when you have always (IMO) been very straight forward and not afraid to confront.

(( when you have strong feelings about something our emotions want to twist the purpose into getting back together, not finding security in being apart. ))

Exactly. But then at times we start regretting. may be she have to go through this for an intellectual or emotional satisfaction.