Hello new Leo female here (Page 2)

***Do they ever seem surprised when the object of their affection eventually informs them that someone new came along and captured their interest while they were not maintaining their part of the relationship. Or that that specific behavior is the pattern that ruined their other previous relationships as well?****

They like to keep options open, so yes they will often act surprised and actually most times pursue more to see if there is still an interest in them. Sometimes they act as if they are hurt.

***What was the rest of the situation there? What happened when things got deep for him? Did he pull the disappearing thing and go off to be "in his head" for weeks at a time? How did you deal with it in addressing him about it? Or did you just let it him be and let him go off to be alone?***

At the time I wasn't looking for a relationship and was enjoying our casual one. He admitted he was getting emotional about us. I told him I wasn't and I enjoyed the time we spent together. He started acting like he wanted more for a little while then he pulled back. It backfired, cause when I was ready for more he wasn't. They hate rejection.

But of course after I got involved with someone else he started calling all the time again a vicious cycle I had to put to a complete stop.

So the basic theory is this. Don't be interested or don't ACT interested and..........they'll BE interested. Yea, I think I Got it!!! That and the fact that I'm about as slow as a Libra when you calculate all the time it took for me over the years and until now to come to this point and learn that.

I think it's natural though to want something you can't have. To long for it and desire it to lesser or greater degrees. ie: When you wanted him.....he wasn't available and you couldn't have him. As soon as you accepted that and moved on... Then he wanted you because you became unavailable. And it takes an enormous amount of maturity and strength to end it. It's a really hard and difficult thing to do. I admire your strength for doing it and can draw strength in knowing that it's always the smart thing to do. No less Painful but it's the smart thing to do for both of you.

I'm working in that direction to end the cycle before it becomes one. But my Libra guy only recently informed me his feelings and his intentions with me had changed. I'm not convinced that they have so I'm prepared to "end the cycle" in the event he can't get it together this time around. No drama. I just intend to be as vacant as he has been (and is being) with me and when I do get around to responding to him I'll tell him that the friendship will last much longer then a romantic relationship with him and therefore....I want to go back to just being friends.

I have no idea if he will accept just being friends but from what I have read from other posts Libra's seem to want that as well if things don't work out.

Oh and did I mention he was also in a new relationship too? Weird... It was best for us to be friends only. People come into your life for different reasons. Some for a season, some for lifetime.

No, you didn't mention that part about him being in a new relationship. That is weird. Puts a spin on things. It validates that you made the right choice.

Although I have no way to be sure that my Libra Guy is or is not involved with anyone else in his life, I want to believe he is being honest with me and therefore will give him the benefit of the doubt. But I leaning more strongly towards your line of thinking that we will be far better friends then lovers.

I dont know if a relationship needs to be that hard ? It feels like a game and I dont like games (unless they re PC/PS2/X-box games !) , even for friendship ...It needs both for the relationship to work , it takes true and genuine feeling , without mind games , push and pull moves ... If it's so hard , headache , wears and tears , why waste your time to stay , you could miss a great person ,a true friend, even a soulmate waiting for you...that's just my view 🙂

I agree exam, that is one reason if something is working out for me. I am the first to move on. Life is too short.

So true.. I have learned so much just by reading everyones stories. It gives me encouragement to stay strong.. 🙂

*** if something ISN'T working out for me***

Lola, always remember to put your happiness first. As women we tend to forget about the most important person. Us.