How to tell someone you aren't interested.

Okay, for the diplomatic librans and anyone else diplomatic (unlike us direct and straigt forward scorps). How do you tell a person you aren't interested without hurting their feelings. A Libra in particular?

A very persistant one that is...

I have no idea. I usually just tell them we aren't compatible because we want different things, list them, then disappear for awhile.

Admittedly? I am bad at this. I do find listing the reasons why the person wouldn't be happy works really well. They usually kick up a fuss at the time but usually go off, think about it, and are okay after.

oh, you're trying to not hurt a libra?? no way. their feelings will be hurt no matter how you put it.

if you can figure some way of making it their idea without pissing them off too badly, it might work.

Aaahhh. Perfect Kenny G, that is so much better than me saying something like, I really am not interested. You are a nice person though.

Libras can read body language quite well. If you're not interested, they'll usually get the hint. You don't have to say anything, but just avoid talking alot to them and give them the closed stance. That's a big hint.

***Libras can read body language quite well. If you're not interested, they'll usually get the hint. You don't have to say anything, but just avoid talking alot to them and give them the closed stance. That's a big hint.***

I know this is true for most of them, but this one.... Didn't get any hints. I totally ignore almost all his calls. I have a reason why we can't hang out everytime he asks and it is getting quite anoying!!! The stingers are peeping out and someone is going to get stung soon. Never known a Libra to annoy anyone so much and be so persistent when the other person clearly isn't interested.

***annoying***

I agree with KennyG.

QS, when you coming to Texas? I can't find the thread that you mentioned this.

HP, it looks like it will probably be at the end of the month. Progably the last weekend 10/27th? I will let you know. I am looking for tickets now... 😢 Soo expensive. I need two, one for my baby girl, now that she is 4 and has her father's height and talks like she is 12, I can't pass her for under 2 anymore and have to pay full price. LOL!!!

***probably***

Just say "I'm not interested....leave me alone".

LOL!!!

*giggles*

Or you could just take them out for a coffee and laugh at yourselves and tell em you're just enjoying your freedom for the time being??

Chatz, negative... There will be no taking anyone out for coffee... I will probably just tell him. "I am not interested." He is a nice guy and I have known him for awhile we just lost contact for quite some time... Oh well...

QS , sometimes they wont listen and a little too persistent .....Tell him you arent interested and if he wanna be friends then you can still see him , otherwise just disappear for awhile , he'll get the message eventually 🙂

Thanks exam. I am disappearing. He won't help but get the message.

Uhhh, gttommy. I have told him I am not really interested once... I don't feel I need to keep repeating myself. I haven't given him a reason to think otherwise since then... However, only because I have known him for awhile and he is a good guy. I was trying to find a diplomatic way to say. "Dammit didn't I tell you!"

As I am an staight forward scorp. I am trying to find ways to not hurt people's feelings so much with my bluntness. Even my girlfriends tell me my bluntness can be offensive. However, when they want an honest opinion I am the first person they seek out. I think this also has something to do with the personal improvement phase I am going through as well. So, this might be more for me than for him. I dunno.

You re doing it right , QS ! You told him but he ignored it , you owe him nothing , you two are friends and I think what you did is enough . Friendship is beautiful and precious so we have to try our best to preserve but it takes two parties to make it work , he obviously didnt want to honour that so stop seeing him is the best way now to save what 's left .
About personal improvement phase , I can understand that , I'm feeling it too and it feels quite good ... Very peaceful and clear ... It's like some burdens disappeared...no intense feeling... Just enjoys my own time and makes plans for my future 🙂

***Really? So you did say you weren't interested? Did you also giggle like a school girl and wiggled your ass afterwards? Or was it spoken clearly, unambiguously and firmly?***

gttommy. I am a grown woman... That should answer that. I am also a scorp.

exam thanks. That is it. I don't see him at all especially after the persistant inquiries. I won't either. I hate losing friends over things like this, but oh well.

We are creatures of reason so the most important thing to do is give him your reasons honestly and tell him that doing anything other than acting on these reasons would be doing it for him and not for you and that is not good for anybody. This is putting it in a way that a Libra would go "Oh, that sounds reasonable". However, with the not so well put together Librans out there that don't get the message, it could result in him trying to solve the problem for you. Comming up with ways you can fulfill your needs while still being in a relationship with him, a compromise of sorts.

If this becomes the case you can get a little more direct with him, in the sense this person is supposed to be your friend and they are not listening and accepting your feelings and needs in the situation. Just point out "this is exactly why we can't be together", you are asking me to compromise for you, and I am telling you I can not compromise myself and what I need for myself for anyone right now. Being in a relationship with you would hold me back, why would you want to do that to me?

Nic, you are right as usual. I just don't have the energy for all that. If I hear from him again. I will repeat myself once and tell him I am not interested and it is annoying that he is still trying to push the issue. NO.

I found the following online:

For the sign that's all about relationships, a breakup feels like true failure. Libra will often hang on until the bitter end, aiming for that elusive harmony. Be willing to attend couples counseling if you're asked. If that doesn't work, appeal to Libra's sense of justice by saying it isn't fair to either of you to continue in a situation that just isn't working.

When Libra is rejected she or he initially feels extremely demoralised, however, Libra will quickly take the action needed to bounce back from disappointment. Libra will do their utmost to make their loved one fall for them again. Should this fail Libra and rejection by searching out another true love. If Libra chooses to the end a relationship the break will be as orderly and dignified as possible. Libra is most likely to reject a partner who is too demanding on the emotional front.

Breaking up with a Libra can be a challenging and nerve-racking experience. It is the most dramatic sign out of the zodiacs and there might be nervous breakdowns and psychodramas at the end of a relationship. Libras are the most difficult sign in the zodiac to break up with because they always need a partner. They will always question and need to know why you are breaking up with them.

Step One - Leave. After you have broken up, it is not a good idea to stay in the immediate area because holding his hand through the break up will only make things worse. It is best to get up and make the break official.

Step Two - Call her mother or best friend and let her know you are splitting up. This action will give the Libra someone to lean on other than you and may help her recover more quickly from the relationship.

Step Three - Introduce him to someone that might be a possible match. Libras hate to be single and always want to have a partner in their lives. He will always want an immediate replacement. Give him someone to turn to when you leave.

Step Four - Act scattered and unstable. Libras are the sign of the scale and try to be balanced in life with relationships, careers and themselves. If you are here one minute and gone the next, she might begin to lose interest.

Step Five - Go away for some time. A libra wants his partner beside him at all times. Be distant, take off for business or to see family now and then. He will begin to feel neglected and search for attention elsewhere.

Hope this helps, the resident experts give great advice. All the Best QS!!! 🙂

Thanks MA, I think you are right...

So I had the party for my boyfriend this weekend and about half of who I invited showed up. Most people stayed until for about 6 hours - not a verylong time, but not a short time either. When the last person finally left, my boyfriend turned to his roommate and said "I'm disappointed that more people didn't show up". He said this as me and my best friend were cleaning up so I heard him say this. I spent close to $ 500 for this party and that's the comment he chose to make?

Also, during the party, he didn't stand or sit near me at all. I didn't expect him to hang on me during the entire party, but I would have hoped he would have hugged or kissed me once in front of his friends. When I walked up to him and a group while they were talking a few times, he'd walk off and start another conversation with another group.

When everyone left and after he'd made the comment to his roommate, he came to me in the kitchen and hugged me and thanked me for the party. I told him "Thank you. Im sorry you're disappointed that I coudn't get more of your friends to come to your party. Now if you excuse me, I have work to do to clean up the mess that the friends that DID come to the party made".

ahhh yes always the sensitive ones these Librans!!!

Oh and did I mention how grateful they are—

*rolls eyes*

*** strange are the ways of love, we know we love someone when they are able to cause pain to us,,,, and scorp have a tendency to cause pain, see people flinch and be sure that yes, he did love me somehow.

... I am a bit krazy at the moment QS, but I think you already KNEW the answer to the question you asked.****

Archer, huh? I don't need to cause pain to know someone cares for me quite contrary to my experience. Pleople who love me shows it freely and me being a scorp know when it is genuine... I am never one to intentionally cause pain. Read the thread this is a friend not a lover or anyone I ever dated... I just asked for a nicer way. As I know I am just blunt by nature.

Wow!!! HP, that did sound a little selfish. Sorry.

yup, i thought so, but i imagine there will be some people who will think i'm the selfish one.

I ended up telling him about the party last Tuesday. I even gave him 3 or 4 chances to let me know who else he wanted to invite to the party. Blah, oh well. 😢

How do you tell a Libra you're not interested: do what Libras do ignore them they'll get the hint. On a lighter note, I think your libra already knows we have a tendency to pickup the vibes, however we may not accept it right away.

Well.... I think he finally got it. Yay!!!