Libra - Libra

Hi
I think I fell in love with a Libra girl but I can't really understand her. We texted each other for some time and I asked her if she wants to go out for some cafe - refusal.
keep texting but no cafe 😢
I told that I like her but she says she doesn't want to give me hope and that she won't fall in love again because she hurt too much before... bla bla bla
Should I keep pushing?

I would think not...texting is addictive and it doesnt matter alot of the time who is texting, the fact that someone is thinking of you is fun. It feels harmless at times.

But she said No and also told you she didnt want to lead you on plus she isnt ready to fall in love again. Decisions she has made...love is not a decision, it comes and bites you without you realising alot of the time that it's hit you.

As a Libra I would make it clear if someone was pursuing me that I really had no romantic interest in them, if they were showing clearly that is what they wanted.

Yes I know, u cant decide to love, can you?
It's OK for me. I thanked her for her sincerity.

But I really thought she liked me too... we played two lovers in a short piece at uni. and both played very good. mhhh pity 😢

Posted by yesbutno
Yes I know, u cant decide to love, can you?
It's OK for me. I thanked her for her sincerity.

But I really thought she liked me too... we played two lovers in a short piece at uni. and both played very good. mhhh pity 😢

She's being very cautious. She probably likes you, but she is looking for stability and not romantic games... If you want to push it, then you got to prove some things. Thing is, will you stay interested long enough?

back off of course. she asked u to so respect her wishes.

feel lucky that she was straight up with u! that's a good sign of maturity on her part. that clearly lets u know that she is in no position to date right now. she pretty much admitted that she was an emotional train wreck so she needs time to sort herself out. remember, there's no set time limit for it either.

i'm with spica... will u stay interested long enough to find out?

Nope. You aren't the one.

You could force the issue but in a few months/years time you will be here complaining about how terrible libras are. Best to give this one a pass.

Oh she likes you and thinks you are a great guy. She just doesn't want to play with your nasty bits. 😉

I'm one of those Libras that can't date another libra, it's too passive for me. But like you, I like what I can't have..... we want what we want and usually takes a minute for us to give up. When she comes around (if she does), I think you will be into someone else.

Why keep pushing when she's literally already told you that no matter how good you are to her or for her, she'll never allow it to pass a certain level? Don't be the person or the guy that thinks you can change someone's mind. Only THEY can do that. And honestly, it's not YOUR job to heal her; only she can do that. She's told you upfront (and you're lucky she did considering most people aren't that honest) that your chances with her are slim to none. Her actions are backing up everything she's said too. And think about it. Are you sure that you want to be with someone whose got so much baggage? Friendships & relationships don't thrive off of just love/like alone. Both people have to be equally emotionally available & healthy before any sort of GOOD & long-lasting relationship came come from it all. When a woman tells you not to get your hopes up, she's not kidding or joking. She's being 100% honest & usually she won't change her mind. It sucks for you as a man b/c that means that regardless of how much you want, like or love her, it won't make a difference to her. BUT, you can't change people. All you can do is learn how to adapt to the situation OR move on to something or someone that WILL give you the fair chance that you deserve. After all, you're not the one who hurt her in the past. If you really like & care about her, you'll leave her alone. She'll never learn to heal & get over her trust issues & insecurities if there's always someone in her face pressuring her to supress them. Leave her alone. The fact that she was so upfront about it means that she's prob. had this mindset for a long time & wayy before you came into the picture. After all, if decides to let you in her heart when she's not really ready, you'll just end up having to pay for the mistakes that other men made! Where's the fun in that! That defeats the purpose of having a companion if all the time will be spent repairing the damage made from someone else instead of actually establishing something new. The answer isn't to cling harder. The answer is to show her AND yourself that you've got enough self love in the bank, enough to leave her be & hope that one day she'll realize that holding on to the past will only create future situations of hurt. BUT, you need to let her realize that. And clinging harder to her or pressuring her to give more than she emotionally can give won't get you anywhere. If anything, leave her be until she becomes the best woman that she can be for your sake

And plus, she might've really started liking you too. And depending on how you look at things, someone bringing out their inner most insecurities & baggage at such a time when they realized they're starting to fall for someone, may be a good thing. When a woman starts to like a man alot, that's when she starts to examine her inner self. And I think what happend is that she realized that she's not yet emotionally available to give you what you're asking for or what you deserve. Does she know that her having this mindset will probably make her lose out on some good potential prospects? Of course, she knows this & deals with this more than you'll ever know. BUT that doesn't change the fact that her baggage & past hurts far outway & OVER-POWER any possibilities of a good thing coming her way. I do think that people can make the decision of who they love b/c love's foundation is not entirely based on emotions. It's based on logic too. People can see "red flags" & "signs" way before they fall in love that will allow them to make the DECISION of whether or not they'll allow themselves to emotionally proceed or not. If that person decides to proceed, even after knowing that the chances weren't good, then that means they made the DECISION to do so, thus it's true that we do have some sort of control over who we fall for. It may suck for your sake that she's not emotionally ready or available for you yet, BUT there's always a million ways you can look at any situation. The GOOD thing is that she told you these things up front, versus you falling head over heels for her & having to find out the hard way. She told you the truth b/c she doesn't want you to chase & get your feelings hurt. She probably doesn't want you to be one of many guys who DO NOT listen to what she's saying. She says what she means & means what she says. And with you being a Libra, it's prob. hard for you to walk away from something/someone that ACTUALLY caught your attention in ways that others haven't. When you Libras see a good thing (IF you're in the right mindset & emotionally available) it's a hard pill to swallow the min. you realize that you don't have a fair chance. But when a Libra is not in the right mindset & cannot let go of the past, they are the WORST b/c they'll invest all of this time in you & out of the blue spring the truth on you & make the reality of what they're saying hit you square in the face. But at this point, the ball is in your court. Only time will heal her, not you

i've done what she's doing. usually when i do it, i'm not into the guy, but i'm trying to let him down easy. nothing helps me get over a broken heart like a new romance. if i don't pursue it, it's because i'm not interested. but i always end up making guys think i am.

everyone's got something bad they do. and the worst things female libras do is lead on guys when we get sad.

leave her alone.

Thank you guys for sharing your advise. Can't say you aren't right. I stopped connecting her for a while but last night I called her. We talked a lot about life but not about our relationship. She was very nice (I know that its not a sign, its just her nature) Just wanted to calm down the situation. Usually I am not the kind of person who insist. In the other hand I don't want to let her go b/c these feelings don't come to me so easy. So, my plan is being passive and wait. Like you guys say: Only time will tell.

Posted by yesbutno
Hi
I think I fell in love with a Libra girl but I can't really understand her. We texted each other for some time and I asked her if she wants to go out for some cafe - refusal.
keep texting but no cafe 😢
I told that I like her but she says she doesn't want to give me hope and that she won't fall in love again because she hurt too much before... bla bla bla
Should I keep pushing?

Nope.

no, at least i wouldnt cuz libra women usually respond well to aggression it seems like she is just looking for a friend to talk to and nothing more, so you wont get anything outta her unless its platonic

texting will not get you anywhere with the girls yesbutno, its alwas better if you let her hear your voice and have a converstation thru Talkin not texting. well now that girls said she been hurt by her past relationship hmm i recommend you take your time with her and be there for her, time will change a girl heart.

"So, my plan is being passive and wait. So, my plan is being passive and wait. Like you guys say: Only time will tell."

Exactly. Patience and sincerity over time is a clear winner. Make it gradual, so in the meantime you can search your feelings as well, and decide if she is right for you. . instead of jumping right in and then when the fog clears you jump right out. That is not what she wants.
Librans are very good for each other, but the main key is to constantly work on themselves. . because the deficiency in one partner is also the same in the other. It can force an evolution like no other, BUT there is a huge barrier to cross; it is the barrier of the self more than anything.

I have been in your exact situation before with a Libra girl.

On both ends:

The mental connection was there.

The attraction was there.

The chemistry was there.


But like the girl in your situation she was not ready for a committed relationship. She needed and wanted to work on herself and issues that were tormenting her.


She did not want nor was she ready for the expectations that come along with an intimate OR committed relationship.

It sounds like the exact same situation you are in. Pushing her will only confuse her more and feel like she can't be close to you without you developing feelings that in turn make her feel obligated. If she gives in and this is the case you would be in for a more head and heartache than happiness and pleasure as you can't balance taking care of yourself and satisfying another when the taking care of yourself requires not being obligated to satisfying another.

When a Libra woman wants you there will be absolutely no room for confusion about it. With the way you feel about her, if she really wanted you she would have you already. If there is a possibility that she could give in it would be for your sake and a Libra woman who is in a position to do this is a Libra woman who really needs that space to figure herself out as it would be completely un-characteristic of a happy/healthy Libra woman to do so in the first place.