Why is it hard for me to accommodate angry/aggressive people?

I’ve recently come to the realization that I have trouble coping with angry/aggressive/spiteful people, and wondering if there’s anything I can do to open my mind and heart to these folks.

I just had a falling out with my Taurus bff of 9 years, because I feel like she’s stuck in concepts of revenge, anger, and self-victimization. I’ve felt like this for a while, but it just boiled over today, but now I feel bad because she was definitely hurt by me calling her out.

I have the same issues with my dad sometimes. He gets frustrated due to his own shame and embarrassment, and projects that on to the people closest to him. I’ve had to go no contact with him several times for this reason.

Is there a way to hang around and love angry/spiteful people, without letting their negativity affect you?

hot-tempered people actually have this odd effect on me.

they make me go very cold.

like i need to maintain some balance.

even in intimate relationships, like say someone i love or care for is very angry/aggressive even if I feel the same way but they explode it's like my temperature drops down and i quickly become very calm.

i just can't meet fire with fire, almost as if one of us has to stay 'awake' or we'll drown. this feels like a defense mechanism, probably from all those years of dealing with people who have bigger egos and bigger tempers than me. or maybe it's the combo of virgo/libra energies in me 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

My take: don't be around then when they're in a shit mood and love them extra hard when they're in a decent one.

If they are chronically in a shit state of mind, let them know is gently as you can and let them know that you'll be back if they choose to change their attitude around you because it's bringing you down, hard.

They have to want to change, you can nudge them in the right direction, but they have to realize that they can't live like that forever.

I’m a stoic individual. I know of someone who gets angry and has a terrible temper. I do not let it affect me and it is not that I am afraid, but standing up to this person about it honestly escalates his anger. He’s an escalator, so I just let it happen.

Honestly, this advice given here:

“My take: don't be around then when they're in a shit mood and love them extra hard when they're in a decent one”

☝️ best gold nugget this thread delivered to you. I never would have thought to do that.

Posted by Bluemoon86
I’m a stoic individual. I know of someone who gets angry and has a terrible temper. I do not let it affect me and it is not that I am afraid, but standing up to this person about it honestly escalates his anger. He’s an escalator, so I just let it happen.


Honestly, this advice given here:


“My take: don't be around then when they're in a shit mood and love them extra hard when they're in a decent one”


☝️ best gold nugget this thread delivered to you. I never would have thought to do that.

Some people react strangely to non-reaction.

My Libra sun/Scorpio moon uncle gets angrier the more chill or calm I am when he's trying to piss off everyone around him coz his life's not going the way he wants.

Then this Capricorn Sun/Leo moon co-worker I had who would antagonize another Capricorn co-worker who blew up on her eventually.

Not that I think those combos matter much because I think with tempers, it's all in the mars.

The thing that made both of them shut up was being violently confronted (my brother literally punching my uncle and that colleague being publicly, loudly called out).

These are rare reactions from what I've seen though.

Someone on here told me that I probably make my uncle feel like he's going crazy because I don't react.

Posted by TarvosTrigaranos
This is where a good friend let's the person know how their outlook is effecting them, and recommend they talk to a professional who is trained to help. They need a call to action. A real friend will tell someone the hard stuff to say, amd not try to enable it or brush it a way.

I think I should’ve done this from the beginning, instead of offering unsolicited advice.

When things finally did blow up yesterday, I told her that her outlook makes me uncomfortable, as do her stories of how she treats people. I mentioned how I’m currently undergoing a spiritual awakening and only want to be surrounded by people who share the same values as myself.

She blew up and accused me of going through spiritual psychosis, and then proceeded to try and leverage my own life circumstances (AND EVEN MY FIRST DOGS DEATH) to gaslight me into believing I’m angry. I sense she was trying to hurt me with those words, though the only effect they had was made me feel guilty for approaching things the way I had.

I have come to the conclusion I can no longer be friends with her, unless she ascends spiritually.

But now I’m scared because she’s been getting into witchcraft and I’m worried she may try to hex me (she mentioned she wants to get into hexing/cursing to channel her angry energy). If anyone has advice on how to protect oneself, it would be greatly appreciated. She is also bipolar with borderline personality, so I’m hoping maybe witchcraft is just part of a delusion for her and not reality.

Posted by Whorpio
But now I’m scared because she’s been getting into witchcraft and I’m worried she may try to hex me (she mentioned she wants to get into hexing/cursing to channel her angry energy). If anyone has advice on how to protect oneself, it would be greatly appreciated. She is also bipolar with borderline personality, so I’m hoping maybe witchcraft is just part of a delusion for her and not reality.

Regarding this, she has sent intimate pictures of men to me (I never ask, and I never respond, hoping my lack of response would discourage her but in hindsight maybe I should have explicitly said “please do not send this type of content to me”). Anyways, should I tell her that if she hexes/curses me I will inform the men in the pictures that she distributed their nude photos without consent, which is illegal where she lives? Would this be a good way to prevent being cursed?

I've lived long enough to have learned some people cannot be loved for they do not love themselves to want to do better! We all got throguh trials and tribulations and offering a safe harbor for those in need during those times, sure. No (wo)man is an island after all! But those who perpetually choose to be emotional vamipers, I only have one thing to offer...





I was going to say staying around these types of people is only enabling their behavior... but Tarvos beat me to it with codependency. potato=photato!

As for the hex ... get a Nazar amulet! It's the most I can suggest.

So I can deal with some anger and spite, no surprise, im no hypocrite (or strive not to be)

But the extroversion aspect of it is sickening, frightening and draining to be around, especially since some blue collar (aries/mars-heavy) men think its the definition of a worthy man. Whoevers the meanest and loudest wins. And mfs be whistling tinnily and punching random objects as they walk by. Women can be similarly "toxic masculinity" ish (esp my mom, and some other butch libras) but they dont do the whistling and punching thing (they just punch their kids and husbands)

Meanness can be hot if you can back it up, if its not totally unfair and when it doesnt involve assaulting the senses of bystanders via shrill noises, constant interrupting and punching inanimate objects as a passive threat to everyone

Also you can try uncrossing candles and the "fear not to walk over evil" spell kit from luckymojo. Or huevo limpia as the cheapest option. Huevo limpia worked best for me, the most noticeable effect was no barometric pressure migraines for at least 2 years. They're back, I'm due for another round

Posted by MidAtBest
So I can deal with some anger and spite, no surprise, im no hypocrite (or strive not to be)


But the extroversion aspect of it is sickening, frightening and draining to be around, especially since some blue collar (aries/mars-heavy) men think its the definition of a worthy man. Whoevers the meanest and loudest wins. And mfs be whistling tinnily and punching random objects as they walk by. Women can be similarly "toxic masculinity" ish (esp my mom, and some other butch libras) but they dont do the whistling and punching thing (they just punch their kids and husbands)


Meanness can be hot if you can back it up, if its not totally unfair and when it doesnt involve assaulting the senses of bystanders via shrill noises, constant interrupting and punching inanimate objects as a passive threat to everyone

I've been waiting to see if someone mentioned extroversion. Cause that's the main thing I'm noticing here. OP is basically just talking extroversion.

I've seen quietly angry people do the worst things. And I can usually pick up shade pretty well. So in my world, I see all kinds of quiet angry and then I feel like OP.

Wonder if it's a moon thing.

Posted by FuelAirPropellant

Posted by MidAtBest
So I can deal with some anger and spite, no surprise, im no hypocrite (or strive not to be)

But the extroversion aspect of it is sickening, frightening and draining to be around, especially since some blue collar (aries/mars-heavy) men think its the definition of a worthy man. Whoevers the meanest and loudest wins. And mfs be whistling tinnily and punching random objects as they walk by. Women can be similarly "toxic masculinity" ish (esp my mom, and some other butch libras) but they dont do the whistling and punching thing (they just punch their kids and husbands)

Meanness can be hot if you can back it up, if its not totally unfair and when it doesnt involve assaulting the senses of bystanders via shrill noises, constant interrupting and punching inanimate objects as a passive threat to everyone

I've been waiting to see if someone mentioned extroversion. Cause that's the main thing I'm noticing here. OP is basically just talking extroversion.


I've seen quietly angry people do the worst things. And I can usually pick up shade pretty well. So in my world, I see all kinds of quiet angry and then I feel like OP.


Wonder if it's a moon thing.

click to expand

Hm yeah I think we both have sag moon

I'm pretty numb to it, only because I understand human nature. Like if someone hurt someone I loved, or tried to physically hurt me I'd absolutely kill them, justify it, and never feel bad a single moment. I'd actually feel happy in a weird way. If someone is just doing things mentally because they have internal issues they want to vent, I completely understand and even accept it. Nothing they say or how they feel emotionally will ever physically effect me, so it means nothing. I'm like a brick wall to that external type of stuff.

Posted by FuelAirPropellant
I've been waiting to see if someone mentioned extroversion. Cause that's the main thing I'm noticing here. OP is basically just talking extroversion.


I've seen quietly angry people do the worst things. And I can usually pick up shade pretty well. So in my world, I see all kinds of quiet angry and then I feel like OP.


Wonder if it's a moon thing.

In my life, the people who show anger outwardly are more common, probably due to my upbringing with an outwardly spiteful father (our ego’s find comfort/predictability in the people who resemble our parents). I have met a few silently angry people, but their temperaments haven’t usually been the type I’ve gotten super close to- I guess you could say I’ve stayed away from those types.

But regardless, I’ve come to understand anger as mis-routed emotions: embarrassment, grief, shame, sadness. And spite to be a projection of people’s inward narratives. Aggression the manifestation of the inability to properly communicate oneself. A triad of low-vibrational energy fueled by self-hatred. Along those lines, I think I perceive such people to be so wrapped up in their own inner unpredictable worlds, that I don’t trust their ability to perceive reality, me, others, etc. I only wish to be around those whose perceptions I do trust.

But then I wonder if I’m a hypocrite, creating my own bubble of peace, love, and happiness, avoiding poison- I fear becoming ignorant myself.

Posted by Whorpio

Posted by FuelAirPropellant
I've been waiting to see if someone mentioned extroversion. Cause that's the main thing I'm noticing here. OP is basically just talking extroversion.

I've seen quietly angry people do the worst things. And I can usually pick up shade pretty well. So in my world, I see all kinds of quiet angry and then I feel like OP.

Wonder if it's a moon thing.

In my life, the people who show anger outwardly are more common, probably due to my upbringing with an outwardly spiteful father (our ego’s find comfort/predictability in the people who resemble our parents). I have met a few silently angry people, but their temperaments haven’t usually been the type I’ve gotten super close to- I guess you could say I’ve stayed away from those types.

But regardless, I’ve come to understand anger as mis-routed emotions: embarrassment, grief, shame, sadness. And spite to be a projection of people’s inward narratives. Aggression the manifestation of the inability to properly communicate oneself. A triad of low-vibrational energy fueled by self-hatred. Along those lines, I think I perceive such people to be so wrapped up in their own inner unpredictable worlds, that I don’t trust their ability to perceive reality, me, others, etc. I only wish to be around those whose perceptions I do trust.

But then I wonder if I’m a hypocrite, creating my own bubble of peace, love, and happiness, avoiding poison- I fear becoming ignorant myself.

click to expand

It may not always be about self-hatred. It may be people who are just too absorbed in their own fantasy to realize other people's reality.

Posted by Soul
I'm pretty numb to it, only because I understand human nature. Like if someone hurt someone I loved, or tried to physically hurt me I'd absolutely kill them, justify it, and never feel bad a single moment. I'd actually feel happy in a weird way. If someone is just doing things mentally because they have internal issues they want to vent, I completely understand and even accept it. Nothing they say or how they feel emotionally will ever physically affect me, so it means nothing. I'm like a brick wall to that external type of stuff.

On the flip side of this, I’d say I understand human nature as well, and have worked hard to understand, re-wire my own thought-processes (which is forever a work in progress), that I’d expect anyone over the age of 25 to have done the same or at least be trying to do the same. Those who aren’t doing the same- I can’t relate and therefore would rather have no involvement.

Posted by victoria-sakura
It may not always be about self-hatred. It may be people who are just too absorbed in their own fantasy to realize other people's reality.

I was going to pose the philosophical question of “to be absorbed in one’s own fantasy is indicative of despising one’s own reality, no?” buuut I can instantly think of someone who is like you said- too absorbed in their own fantasy to realize other people’s reality, with no sign of self-loathing.

I wonder if this is a global issue, or just western issue in cultures where TikTok, IG, X, etc are the biggest “hobbies”.

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by Bluemoon86
I’m a stoic individual. I know of someone who gets angry and has a terrible temper. I do not let it affect me and it is not that I am afraid, but standing up to this person about it honestly escalates his anger. He’s an escalator, so I just let it happen.

Honestly, this advice given here:

“My take: don't be around then when they're in a shit mood and love them extra hard when they're in a decent one”

☝️ best gold nugget this thread delivered to you. I never would have thought to do that.

Some people react strangely to non-reaction.


My Libra sun/Scorpio moon uncle gets angrier the more chill or calm I am when he's trying to piss off everyone around him coz his life's not going the way he wants.


Then this Capricorn Sun/Leo moon co-worker I had who would antagonize another Capricorn co-worker who blew up on her eventually.


Not that I think those combos matter much because I think with tempers, it's all in the mars.


The thing that made both of them shut up was being violently confronted (my brother literally punching my uncle and that colleague being publicly, loudly called out).


These are rare reactions from what I've seen though.


Someone on here told me that I probably make my uncle feel like he's going crazy because I don't react.

click to expand

Some equates reacting to caring.

Posted by Whorpio

Posted by Soul
I'm pretty numb to it, only because I understand human nature. Like if someone hurt someone I loved, or tried to physically hurt me I'd absolutely kill them, justify it, and never feel bad a single moment. I'd actually feel happy in a weird way. If someone is just doing things mentally because they have internal issues they want to vent, I completely understand and even accept it. Nothing they say or how they feel emotionally will ever physically affect me, so it means nothing. I'm like a brick wall to that external type of stuff.

On the flip side of this, I’d say I understand human nature as well, and have worked hard to understand, re-wire my own thought-processes (which is forever a work in progress), that I’d expect anyone over the age of 25 to have done the same or at least be trying to do the same. Those who aren’t doing the same- I can’t relate and therefore would rather have no involvement.

click to expand

You have to realize how much media, internet, and just living in today's time has manipulated human perspective. Millions literally just goon to porn all day. Others hate post on the internet just because it feels good. People are fucked. In weird ways I actually want AI to take over, because we humans obviously can't make shit work on our own. Fact is you are going to forever have to live with these degenerates and these chaotic people. Best thing you can do right now is focus on you, and how you react to the world, or ignore it. Don't let inevitable external chaos manipulate your internal framework.

Posted by Whorpio

Posted by victoria-sakura
It may not always be about self-hatred. It may be people who are just too absorbed in their own fantasy to realize other people's reality.

I was going to pose the philosophical question of “to be absorbed in one’s own fantasy is indicative of despising one’s own reality, no?” buuut I can instantly think of someone who is like you said- too absorbed in their own fantasy to realize other people’s reality, with no sign of self-loathing.

I wonder if this is a global issue, or just western issue in cultures where TikTok, IG, X, etc are the biggest “hobbies”.

click to expand

I've been in customer service for both eastern and western culture alike. I've seen anger and aggression from both, manifests as soon as reality doesn't fit into their world.

Posted by Whorpio

Posted by FuelAirPropellant
I've been waiting to see if someone mentioned extroversion. Cause that's the main thing I'm noticing here. OP is basically just talking extroversion.

I've seen quietly angry people do the worst things. And I can usually pick up shade pretty well. So in my world, I see all kinds of quiet angry and then I feel like OP.

Wonder if it's a moon thing.

In my life, the people who show anger outwardly are more common, probably due to my upbringing with an outwardly spiteful father (our ego’s find comfort/predictability in the people who resemble our parents). I have met a few silently angry people, but their temperaments haven’t usually been the type I’ve gotten super close to- I guess you could say I’ve stayed away from those types.

But regardless, I’ve come to understand anger as mis-routed emotions: embarrassment, grief, shame, sadness. And spite to be a projection of people’s inward narratives. Aggression the manifestation of the inability to properly communicate oneself. A triad of low-vibrational energy fueled by self-hatred. Along those lines, I think I perceive such people to be so wrapped up in their own inner unpredictable worlds, that I don’t trust their ability to perceive reality, me, others, etc. I only wish to be around those whose perceptions I do trust.

But then I wonder if I’m a hypocrite, creating my own bubble of peace, love, and happiness, avoiding poison- I fear becoming ignorant myself.

click to expand

It sounds like a defense mechanism. I think similarly, I see the ugly and want to avoid it.

At least you're aware.

Posted by victoria-sakura

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by Bluemoon86
I’m a stoic individual. I know of someone who gets angry and has a terrible temper. I do not let it affect me and it is not that I am afraid, but standing up to this person about it honestly escalates his anger. He’s an escalator, so I just let it happen.

Honestly, this advice given here:

“My take: don't be around then when they're in a shit mood and love them extra hard when they're in a decent one”

☝️ best gold nugget this thread delivered to you. I never would have thought to do that.

Some people react strangely to non-reaction.

My Libra sun/Scorpio moon uncle gets angrier the more chill or calm I am when he's trying to piss off everyone around him coz his life's not going the way he wants.

Then this Capricorn Sun/Leo moon co-worker I had who would antagonize another Capricorn co-worker who blew up on her eventually.

Not that I think those combos matter much because I think with tempers, it's all in the mars.

The thing that made both of them shut up was being violently confronted (my brother literally punching my uncle and that colleague being publicly, loudly called out).

These are rare reactions from what I've seen though.

Someone on here told me that I probably make my uncle feel like he's going crazy because I don't react.
click to expand

Some equates reacting to caring.

click to expand

idk my family's weird asf my Libra moon grandma laughs and thinks it's hilarious when someone blows up over feelings (grief, sadness, anger, etc) yet she raises this annoying Libra sun uncle to torment people even more when they don't blow up. very odd observing this.

i'm happy to be free to be openly-emotional now with my Pisces sun/Scorpio moon husband who thinks i'm the biggest crybaby in the world.

Because they drain your energy. Their aggression demands so much attention, the energy of which enters their black hole/ shadow never to be seen again and you're always left reeling unconsciously wondering how you're going to get that positive energy back. Aggression is a form of energy vampirism. Best keep your boundaries high as possible.

These people are in your life to teach you the invaluable lesson of boundaries and protecting your peace.

Posted by virgoOPPP
hot-tempered people actually have this odd effect on me.


they make me go very cold.


like i need to maintain some balance.


even in intimate relationships, like say someone i love or care for is very angry/aggressive even if I feel the same way but they explode it's like my temperature drops down and i quickly become very calm.


i just can't meet fire with fire, almost as if one of us has to stay 'awake' or we'll drown. this feels like a defense mechanism, probably from all those years of dealing with people who have bigger egos and bigger tempers than me. or maybe it's the combo of virgo/libra energies in me 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Don't have much virgo in me and pretty much no libra, but I do exactly that. I go stone cold, and it's definitely a defense mechanism.

"Why is it hard for me to accommodate angry/aggressive people?"

It's you trying to protect yourself. That's probably a healthy approach.

Posted by clare
Because they drain your energy. Their aggression demands so much attention, the energy of which enters their black hole/ shadow never to be seen again and you're always left reeling unconsciously wondering how you're going to get that positive energy back. Aggression is a form of energy vampirism. Best keep your boundaries high as possible.

Do you have any recommendations on how to establish a solid boundary with these types, without making them feel scorned? @LadyNeptune I’d also like your advice on that, if you have any.

Right now I have a cancer friend who I’ve had an iffy feeling about for a while, but recently she forwarded emails to me between her and her ex-husband that really solidified what kind of person she is.

She’s currently recovering from a divorce and needs emotional support, and is trying to go on vacation with me in December. But after reading what I read and my own experiences with her, I don’t feel comfortable continuing a friendship.

How would I put an end to it, without being vilified? I’m not worried of her perception of me, but I would be worried about a potential smear campaign (since that’s what she’s doing with her ex husband) and also potentially her asking her clients/friends to write bad reviews that would inhibit my sw operations.

Posted by Whorpio

Posted by clare
Because they drain your energy. Their aggression demands so much attention, the energy of which enters their black hole/ shadow never to be seen again and you're always left reeling unconsciously wondering how you're going to get that positive energy back. Aggression is a form of energy vampirism. Best keep your boundaries high as possible.

Do you have any recommendations on how to establish a solid boundary with these types, without making them feel scorned? @LadyNeptune I’d also like your advice on that, if you have any.

Right now I have a cancer friend who I’ve had an iffy feeling about for a while, but recently she forwarded emails to me between her and her ex-husband that really solidified what kind of person she is.

She’s currently recovering from a divorce and needs emotional support, and is trying to go on vacation with me in December. But after reading what I read and my own experiences with her, I don’t feel comfortable continuing a friendship.

How would I put an end to it, without being vilified? I’m not worried of her perception of me, but I would be worried about a potential smear campaign (since that’s what she’s doing with her ex husband) and also potentially her asking her clients/friends to write bad reviews that would inhibit my sw operations.

click to expand

Somehow make it look like it's her idea that she needs to get away from YOU.

Posted by WarAngel79

Posted by Whorpio

Posted by clare
Because they drain your energy. Their aggression demands so much attention, the energy of which enters their black hole/ shadow never to be seen again and you're always left reeling unconsciously wondering how you're going to get that positive energy back. Aggression is a form of energy vampirism. Best keep your boundaries high as possible.

Do you have any recommendations on how to establish a solid boundary with these types, without making them feel scorned? @LadyNeptune I’d also like your advice on that, if you have any.

Right now I have a cancer friend who I’ve had an iffy feeling about for a while, but recently she forwarded emails to me between her and her ex-husband that really solidified what kind of person she is.

She’s currently recovering from a divorce and needs emotional support, and is trying to go on vacation with me in December. But after reading what I read and my own experiences with her, I don’t feel comfortable continuing a friendship.

How would I put an end to it, without being vilified? I’m not worried of her perception of me, but I would be worried about a potential smear campaign (since that’s what she’s doing with her ex husband) and also potentially her asking her clients/friends to write bad reviews that would inhibit my sw operations.
click to expand

Somehow make it look like it's her idea that she needs to get away from YOU.

click to expand

I’m trying to be on a journey of honesty and honoring thyself.

Would this be a betrayal to oneself, to passively manipulate a situation to gain the desired outcome?

Posted by Whorpio

Posted by WarAngel79

Posted by Whorpio

Posted by clare
Because they drain your energy. Their aggression demands so much attention, the energy of which enters their black hole/ shadow never to be seen again and you're always left reeling unconsciously wondering how you're going to get that positive energy back. Aggression is a form of energy vampirism. Best keep your boundaries high as possible.

Do you have any recommendations on how to establish a solid boundary with these types, without making them feel scorned? @LadyNeptune I’d also like your advice on that, if you have any.

Right now I have a cancer friend who I’ve had an iffy feeling about for a while, but recently she forwarded emails to me between her and her ex-husband that really solidified what kind of person she is.

She’s currently recovering from a divorce and needs emotional support, and is trying to go on vacation with me in December. But after reading what I read and my own experiences with her, I don’t feel comfortable continuing a friendship.

How would I put an end to it, without being vilified? I’m not worried of her perception of me, but I would be worried about a potential smear campaign (since that’s what she’s doing with her ex husband) and also potentially her asking her clients/friends to write bad reviews that would inhibit my sw operations.
click to expand

Somehow make it look like it's her idea that she needs to get away from YOU.
click to expand

I’m trying to be on a journey of honesty and honoring thyself.

Would this be a betrayal to oneself, to passively manipulate a situation to gain the desired outcome?

click to expand

Put that on pause and get this toxic person off your ass. Then you can turn it back on again. Whatever it takes.

Posted by Whorpio

Posted by clare
Because they drain your energy. Their aggression demands so much attention, the energy of which enters their black hole/ shadow never to be seen again and you're always left reeling unconsciously wondering how you're going to get that positive energy back. Aggression is a form of energy vampirism. Best keep your boundaries high as possible.

Do you have any recommendations on how to establish a solid boundary with these types, without making them feel scorned? @LadyNeptune I’d also like your advice on that, if you have any.

Right now I have a cancer friend who I’ve had an iffy feeling about for a while, but recently she forwarded emails to me between her and her ex-husband that really solidified what kind of person she is.

She’s currently recovering from a divorce and needs emotional support, and is trying to go on vacation with me in December. But after reading what I read and my own experiences with her, I don’t feel comfortable continuing a friendship.

How would I put an end to it, without being vilified? I’m not worried of her perception of me, but I would be worried about a potential smear campaign (since that’s what she’s doing with her ex husband) and also potentially her asking her clients/friends to write bad reviews that would inhibit my sw operations.

click to expand

Depending on the closeness of the friendship, I might do a slow fade-out, keeping super personal conversation minimal. Short but friendly replies, this kind of thing. If she's into witchcraft (unfortunately I've known someone with negative intentions like this), I'd protect by shielding and light energy. Increase your vibration and ask your guides for help. If confrontational just keep it friendly and short if you can't trust. Honestly some people you can't even trust enough to maintain openness with, you just can't work it out if they're spiteful and aggressive. I get it, I really do. I hope it works out ok for you, whatever you choose to do.

Posted by Whorpio

Posted by clare
Because they drain your energy. Their aggression demands so much attention, the energy of which enters their black hole/ shadow never to be seen again and you're always left reeling unconsciously wondering how you're going to get that positive energy back. Aggression is a form of energy vampirism. Best keep your boundaries high as possible.

Do you have any recommendations on how to establish a solid boundary with these types, without making them feel scorned? @LadyNeptune I’d also like your advice on that, if you have any.

Right now I have a cancer friend who I’ve had an iffy feeling about for a while, but recently she forwarded emails to me between her and her ex-husband that really solidified what kind of person she is.

She’s currently recovering from a divorce and needs emotional support, and is trying to go on vacation with me in December. But after reading what I read and my own experiences with her, I don’t feel comfortable continuing a friendship.

How would I put an end to it, without being vilified? I’m not worried of her perception of me, but I would be worried about a potential smear campaign (since that’s what she’s doing with her ex husband) and also potentially her asking her clients/friends to write bad reviews that would inhibit my sw operations.

click to expand

Divorces are very emotional and can devolve into spite real quick. I would typically give grace to a friend who is treating their ex like shit without automatically assuming the same treatment is in store for me from them.

That being said if you want to decouple yourself from the friendship, definitely don't plan a vaca together! If this person follows you on sm, create a separate group excluding her so that when you post stories she cannot view them. Mute her on sm as well. All that means is her posts and stories will not show up on your feed. Meaning you will not be interacting/viewing them.

When she bitches and moans bitch right back. Nobody wants to be around someone who is in crisis mode 24/7. This has definitely worked on me doing a slow fade from those who only want to trauma dump and use me for free therapy.

I have a friend who went full zio and I have done a slow fade because, gross. I was pushing back but she did not want to hear it. So now its just exchange those meaningless pleasantries every 6 months of, oh yeah we should get together. And then don't. Helps that she lives 2,400+ miles away.

IDK if this is all that helpful.

Posted by Whorpio
I’ve recently come to the realization that I have trouble coping with angry/aggressive/spiteful people, and wondering if there’s anything I can do to open my mind and heart to these folks.

I just had a falling out with my Taurus bff of 9 years, because I feel like she’s stuck in concepts of revenge, anger, and self-victimization. I’ve felt like this for a while, but it just boiled over today, but now I feel bad because she was definitely hurt by me calling her out.

I have the same issues with my dad sometimes. He gets frustrated due to his own shame and embarrassment, and projects that on to the people closest to him. I’ve had to go no contact with him several times for this reason.

Is there a way to hang around and love angry/spiteful people, without letting their negativity affect you?

Yes, there is. Just mind your own business and do what you wanna do. So get it, it's like wherever you wanna go to in any point you are seeing your future to where you are going and what you are about to face. But you also gotta remember what you did yesterday and the day before that would make them like that. Also, u gotta remember who you are inside (grounded). Ya basically your eyes can fool you.. anything anyone mention around your side, pick it up like trash on the surface of the ocean. Good idea, right?

Don't forget you will return back and check out how you go about your day to find out your results of the day. That is why my God told me to check in every 5 times a day. Your check-in is like your pitstop.